by Janie Crouch
He yanked her into his lap. “And with me. You and I belong together.”
She kissed him. “And with you.”
“Then show me around this city for a couple of days since I’m here, and then let’s go home.”
Epilogue
Five months later...
“Christina Billows.”
“Felix Bitterman.”
“Blake Bolling—”
The announcer didn’t get Baby’s name all the way out before the cheering started all over the auditorium as his friends and family made an obnoxious show of their love and support at his graduation.
There were so many of them that it had been impossible for everyone to sit together.
He could hear them scattered all over the large hall as he walked across the stage and shook hands with the college president, who handed him the paper that signified his diploma.
He’d done it. He had gotten his college degree.
The announcer kept calling names as he continued his way across the stage, stopping as he reached the edge to look over at one of the faculty members—the newest, full-time faculty member—sitting there beaming at him.
I love you.
They both mouthed it at the same time then smiled.
He’d take his ring being on her finger over the diploma being in his hand any day, but he hadn’t had to choose.
He stepped down off the stage and into his future.
Turn the page for the extended bonus epilogue
Extended Bonus Epilogue
Two years later
The Linear Tactical party was breaking up by the time Quinn arrived. But she’d driven over directly from the airport because she’d wanted to be here for her husband’s big day. He’d been finalizing the plans for this playground for months. She knew that seeing it actually come to life would be a big thrill for him.
Two years of marriage and she still loved seeing him get excited about stuff like this.
She caught Finn and Charlie as they buckled their two younger kids into their car seats. Charlie grinned so hard, Quinn thought her face might split.
“You look pretty happy. What’s going on?”
“Oh nothing.” Charlie’s smile didn’t get any smaller. “Just a little announcement you missed.”
“About the playground? Is everything okay with it?”
Quinn glanced in the direction of the elaborate play palace Baby had designed for all the kids who were now part of the Linear Tactical family. He’d worked so hard on it. She couldn’t stand the thought that something had gone wrong, although looking over at it now, it seemed to resemble the elaborate plans exactly as he’d drawn them up.
“Oh no,” Finn said. “My brother designed a masterpiece, and the kids have already deemed him the most wonderful person to ever have graced the planet.”
Quinn had to agree with the kids’ good taste. “Then what is the big news?”
Charlie closed the car door. “We probably shouldn’t tell you, but it’s not like you’re not going to hear it in a couple minutes anyway. You’re going to be an aunt again.”
Quinn’s eyes got big, and she pulled Charlie in for a hug. “You’re pregnant again? You guys are like rabbits! You do know how babies are made, right?”
Charlie laughed. “No, not me, dummy. Boy Riley and Girl Riley are having a baby. You’re going to be an aunt on that side of the family.”
“Oh my God.” Now it was Quinn’s smile that threatened to split her face.
“Yup. Evidently it was a big surprise to them, too. Anne knew and didn’t plan to say anything here at the picnic, but then Girl Riley shook her down.”
Quinn couldn’t stop smiling. Her brother was going to be a dad. If he thought he’d done scary stuff up until now, Phoenix had another thing coming.
“Those two left a while ago to process everything, but I’m sure you’ll be getting a call from them soon.” Finn smiled. “And as for us, I think three boys might be enough.”
Charlie shot Quinn a look that said that particular topic was still open for debate as far as she was concerned. Quinn wasn’t sure who would win that battle.
“Get over there and kiss my brother,” Finn said. “He still doesn’t like it when you’re away.”
She gave them a little wave and headed to where Baby was talking to the only two remaining picnickers, Zac and Anne. She didn’t like to be away from him either. She liked teaching the graduate-level workshop Harvard had offered, but traveling back to the East Coast twice a month, even in first-class on their dime, was becoming pretty exhausting.
Last month she’d been so tired, she’d barely recovered before it was time to turn around and fly back again.
She’d mentioned it to Anne in passing, and next thing she knew, she’d been bullied into coming into the hospital and having bloodwork drawn. Anne was concerned Quinn might be anemic.
Maybe some iron shots would help her feel better, because she had to admit she felt like crap. She didn’t want to let Baby know, but she was tired all the time.
She was forty-one years old. Her husband had turned thirty a couple months ago. Telling him she already couldn’t keep up with him did not bode well for their future. She thought she’d gotten over the age gap fears that had nested inside her brain, but evidently not.
Zac said something to Baby that made him cross his arms over his chest and nod. They both looked over at the new playground equipment, and Baby saw her walking toward him.
The smile that lit his gorgeous face was so big that every concern she had about any of their differences floated away.
More than three years together and he still looked at her like she lit up his very world. She understood that, because she felt the exact same way.
As soon as she reached his side, he yanked her against his chest and kissed her as if there was nobody else around.
“Baby.” She laughed when she could finally catch her breath and pushed at his muscled chest.
“Hey, Cupcake. You’re home early. Thank goodness.”
“I wanted to see your masterpiece. I’m sorry I missed the kids playing on it.”
“Oh, they’ll be plenty of kids to watch playing on it in the future, don’t you worry.”
“Including my brother and Girl Riley’s new little one, so I hear.”
“Charlie can’t keep a secret to save her life.” Anne laughed and rolled her eyes. “Although, I guess neither can I since Riley somehow maneuvered me into telling her private news in the middle of the picnic.”
“Pregnancy is happy news.” Zac wrapped an arm around Anne, looking over at their infant daughter, Becky, sleeping in the carrier on the table. “Gives them even more time to celebrate.”
“Yeah, I was happy to give some good news. It doesn’t always end up that way.” Anne shot a look over at Quinn, then looked away quickly.
Baby didn’t notice the look, thankfully; Quinn hadn’t mentioned her medical appointment to him.
But Quinn noticed.
The guys walked over to discuss something about the playground, and she knew had to pull a Riley and get Anne to spill her news also.
“Are you going to tell me what that look was about?” Quinn said as soon as the guys were out of earshot.
Anne busied herself tucking a blanket in around her daughter.
“Anne, it’s okay to tell me. Whatever it is, I’d rather face it straight on.”
Anne still didn’t turn. “How are you feeling? Still tired?”
Quinn closed her eyes for just a second. There was something wrong with her health. If nothing was wrong, Anne wouldn’t have led with that.
“You know if you don’t tell me, I’m just going to go home and research all the possibilities. I trust your medical degree more than what some random stranger is going to tell me on the internet.”
Anne finally turned to face her. The worried look in the quiet woman’s eyes did not reassure Quinn. “It’s late. You’ve traveled clear across the country. Why don’t you and Baby come
in on Monday morning to see me. We can talk.”
She went back to the unnecessary tucking of the blanket. Did Anne really not understand that at this point not telling Quinn was just making it worse?
Quinn walked over and stared down at little Becky sleeping peacefully. She and Baby had tried to get pregnant when they’d first gotten married since they’d known the window of opportunity was narrow. But it hadn’t worked out for them. After Theo and Savannah had come into Dorian and Ray’s lives, she and Baby had decided they’d definitely like to adopt, although not the same way as the Lindstrom family.
Nobody would ever adopt the way they had.
But Quinn and Baby had so much love in their hearts to offer a child that adoption had seemed like a wonderful option. Maybe older kids. Maybe foster to adopt.
Quinn had made her peace with never having a biological child. She was fine with it. But she’d never considered that maybe she was terminally ill or something and now any sort of family was out of the question.
She reached over and grabbed Anne’s hand on the baby carrier. “I’m not trying to wreck your weekend, Anne, really. But I want to know if I need to prepare myself, and Baby, for the worst.”
“I knew something was wrong.”
Quinn spun around at Baby’s words, not having realized the guys had walked back over
His green eyes were filled with worry. “I know you been trying to hide it, but I could tell. You’ve been exhausted all the time and quiet. I thought you were sad. I thought maybe being out at Harvard made you realize how much you missed it. But are you saying there’s something physically wrong?”
Quinn should’ve known he would notice. He noticed everything about her—wasn’t that one of the reasons she loved him so much?
She turned back to Anne. “I don’t know if there’s something physically wrong with me. Anne and I thought maybe I was anemic, so I had some blood work done last week.”
Anne rubbed her eyes with her thumb and forefinger. “Actually, it ends up you are a little anemic. We need to get you on some iron.”
“But there’s more,” she and Baby both said it at the same time.
She looked at him, and they both reached out their hands for each other. She stepped over until their hands grasped each other.
Whatever this was, they would handle it the way they had learned how to handle everything life threw at them: together.
He gave her a little nod that let her know he was thinking the same thing. She let go of his hand and wrapped an arm around his waist, feeling his arm come around her shoulders.
“Tell us.” Together, again.
“Fine.” Anne let out a breath and took a step closer. “But I want you to listen to everything I have to say before you react.”
This had to be bad. Baby’s hand squeezed her shoulder.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“Girl Riley isn’t the only one who’s pregnant.”
Quinn waited for the rest of the statement, but it didn’t come.
Shock flooded her system. Wait—
“Me?” Her gaze flew to Baby then back to Anne. “I thought you told me I couldn’t get pregnant anymore.”
Anne shook her head. “No, I just said that the older you got, the fewer eggs you release each month, which of course lessened your chance of becoming pregnant, and that you should make sure you’d come to terms with that.”
Quinn could hardly process what she was hearing. She leaned into Baby, staring up at him. Her rock. The one who had helped her make sense of anything she couldn’t seem to understand. “I’m pregnant?”
But there were still shadows in his eyes. He was remembering the rest of what Anne had said. That they had to get all the news before they reacted.
Right. She grabbed a fistful of Baby’s shirt. “Is the fetus okay?”
“Is Quinn okay?” Baby asked.
Anne gave them a tight smile. “Yes. You’re around thirteen weeks pregnant, so the good news is that you’re past the normal miscarriage stage. But getting pregnant at your age is considered high-risk. We’ll have to monitor you closely. Weekly visits. There are factors we’ll want to take into consideration–gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, which can lead to preeclampsia.”
High-risk. Okay, Quinn could handle that.
“You also need to know that women who get pregnant after the age of forty, especially for the first time, run a higher risk of having a child born with Down syndrome. When we ran your blood, it was standard practice to check certain proteins. Those levels weren’t normal.”
Quinn wasn’t sure how she was supposed to react. “Does that definitely mean the baby has Down syndrome?”
Anne shook her head emphatically. “No. It just means the chance is higher.”
“What does that mean?” Baby asked. “I mean, I know what Down syndrome is, but what does it mean? Will the baby die?”
Anne shook her head just as emphatically again. “No. No it just means you might have a kid with an extra chromosome. He or she will still be beautiful. Still be your child. Just might need some extra help in life.”
“I know all about needing a little extra help, and Quinn knows all about giving it.” He squeezed her shoulder.
Quinn nodded slowly. This wasn’t nearly the same thing. “So, what do we need to do?”
“On Monday, I’d like you to come in and get you assigned to a normal OB-GYN. We’ll do a normal prenatal work up. I can answer any questions you have.” Anne walked over and grabbed both their hands. “In two weeks, we can do an amniocentesis. That’s a procedure that will let you know more definitively whether the baby has Down syndrome.”
Quinn squeezed Anne’s fingers. “Will the baby having Down syndrome or not make any difference in my pregnancy?”
“No, not at all. Your pregnancy will be completely normal, subject to all the good and bad parts of a pregnancy. Your baby will be born and cry and coo and poop just like every other baby regardless of whether he or she has Down syndrome or not.”
“Then why have the test?” Baby asked. “Is there anything in particular we need to prepare for that the results will give us?”
Anne pressed her lips together. “No. Generally, the test is just for your peace of mind, and in case you decided you didn’t want to go through with the pregnancy.”
Quinn reached out to pull Anne into a hug. “Thank you. You’ve carried a heavy burden this weekend, but I appreciate you telling us now rather than making us wait.”
“Just know that I support you no matter what you decide. And no one else in Oak Creek will know you’re pregnant unless you decide to tell them. They never need to know you were ever pregnant at all.”
Quinn, a little numb, nodded and grabbed Baby’s hand as they both turned to walk toward the car. She put her other hand over her belly.
She was pregnant.
Two weeks later
Baby curled his hand over his beloved sleeping wife’s belly. She was fifteen weeks pregnant. According to the books he’d read, books she’d helped teach him to read two years ago, the fetus was roughly the size of an orange.
Her belly was gently rounded, soft, not much different than the way it had always been. The way he loved.
She’d been to see Anne three times since the day they’d found out she was pregnant. According to the doctor, everything about the pregnancy seemed fine, and Anne had referred her to an OB-GYN. Both doctors had said Quinn’s hCG levels were right on target for Quinn’s due date.
Her due date if she decided to carry the pregnancy to term.
Today was the day of the amniocentesis. Quinn probably knew more about that test than most doctors did. She’d studied it, studied Down syndrome, looked at all the ways their lives would change if their child was afflicted.
Baby was doing his best to support Quinn in whatever way he could. He knew how her mind worked. Knew she needed to surround herself with as much information as possible in order to make a decision. To an outsider, it might look cold a
nd calculated to consider their unborn child with such deliberate objectivity. Trying to decide the best course of action.
Baby already knew the best course of action. He’d known it the moment Anne had said Quinn was pregnant. The only thing that would have made a difference for him was if Anne had said the baby was jeopardizing Quinn’s life.
He reached down and whispered next to Quinn’s belly, “But you’re not, are you, tiny person?”
The child growing inside her was a part of both of them. Baby didn’t care how many extra chromosomes the little one had. He was prepared from the first moment to welcome him or her into their family.
But he knew his big-brained wife needed to work things through in her own way. And if she decided a child with this sort of special needs was more than she could handle...
Well, then she was about to be surprised by just how good of an academic he’d become. He had a plan. A way to assure Quinn that she would get the support she needed no matter what their child needed. He had charts and graphs and statistics, but most of all, he was ready to prove to her that she would be a wonderful mother no matter what.
And she would be.
No matter what.
He felt her fingers slip into his hair, scratching gently. “What you doing down there?”
He kissed her belly then slid up until he could kiss her lips.
“Just seeing if I could tell any difference. Still looks just as beautiful to me.”
“About the test today...”
He waited, then waited some more, but she never finished.
“We face it together, no matter what.” He kissed her again. “Together.”
“I…”
She trailed off again. Again he waited, but she never finished. He kissed her once more. “You better hit the shower. We’ve got to leave in an hour.”
“Roger.”
He went into the kitchen to make his coffee and her decaffeinated tea. He’d already finished his entire first mug; she was still in the shower.
She never took this long. He glanced at the clock. They were supposed to leave in just over thirty minutes. There was no way she was going to have time to get her hair up in her proper teaching/appointment bun—he’d given up on trying to talk her out of that as long as she kept her hair down and loose at home.
