by Sonya Jesus
So here we are now, Del dragging me over to this non-list game and trying to win me this obnoxious prize. At times, friends pass by, see the game, and keep on walking. We might get a wave, but no one is stopping. Laughing at all of this right now doesn't seem the best idea. The sweetness behind Del trying to win this for me has me on cloud nine and confuses the hell out of me all at the same time.
"YES!" Del screams so loud it scares the living crap out of me, and I'm standing right next to him. "Finally, finally I did it. I want the best stuffed dog you got." The pure happiness radiating off him was so worth the wait and who knows how much money he spent. Never have I ever seen this smile before. "What are you staring at, sweetheart?" he finally asks.
"I don't think I've ever seen you smile so big. Even with all that hair, I can still see like all your teeth." Stepping toward me, he puts his hand on my cheek and runs his fingertips down my jawline. Goosebumps coat my skin in one fluid wave of intense goodness. My stomach tightens, and my body is stalk still.
"Maybe I haven't had anything to make me smile like that before now." I don't know if he's going to lean in the last few inches between us and kiss me, but I know I want him to. His eyes keep moving down to my lips, but only for a second, then rush back to my eyes. Should I take the bull by the horns and lean in first, because his lips have never looked so good before now?
The crowd decides for us, and a man bumps into Del from behind, breaking the magical moment, bringing us back to now. Damn this crowd of people for ruining our first possible moment ever.
"Come on, everyone is on the move to the beach for the fireworks." He sounds grumpy now. Good, because I'm grumpy as hell too since I didn't get what I wanted, either.
"Really? They are having actual fireworks this year?" I am still trying not to get my hopes up yet over the fireworks because something always happens to cause the show to be canceled. I guess by now they would've canceled them, but I love them so much and always get bummed out when the cancelation happens. One year the equipment they needed to shoot them off into the air showed up a week late. The worst time was when the town committee plain forgot to schedule them in. That was last year, and no one was happy.
All year long they have been hyping this up and using No matter what, the show will go on as the slogan. No wonder we got bumped out of our moment, the horde of people walking toward the beach is crazy. They all seem to have a crazed look in their eyes over what is about to happen. You must give the people what they want, and for years this is all they have been asking for.
"Damn, this crowd is huge," Del says, putting me right dab in front of him with one hand on my hip while the other hand is working his phone to see where everyone is sitting. There are only a few actual walkways that get you to the beach, and that’s where the main congestion is. Del takes his hand off my hip, and I immediately feel the loss. But then out of nowhere, he slings his arm across my body almost like a seatbelt. His right arm goes from my right shoulder, crossing my chest and grabbing on to my left hip. We are now smashed together, my back to his front, and it feels simply divine. I can feel all of his solid muscle in his arm, chest, and abs.
He's always stayed in shape, and I think that helps with his endurance at work, but he was never too bulky with muscle. I've seen him shirtless before, yes, and it has always taken my breath away, but I've never actually touched his chest before. When I had the chance to grab his arm in any way, for whatever reason, I did. Sadly, these times only showed their face maybe once a year, if that. My hands demanded to stay wrapped around his arm as much as possible tonight. He seemed into it, and they longed to feel his solid muscle again. I had to give my hands what they wanted, right?
Del's mouth is by my left ear, so I can hear what he's saying on the phone. It's not much but a lot of grunts and "okays." Frustration is in his tone, and I'm wondering if we are separated from the group for good. I will not complain either way, surely not, but I am bummed a little that the first time in years we'll get to see fireworks, and we all won't be together. Sappy is not really a word that comes to mind or a word people would use to describe me, but when the time comes, that shit hits hard and spreads quickly.
Having older siblings, the bond isn't quite as strong as it would be if our ages were closer together. I went from the annoying little sister to their slightly older sister that they tell their married friends about. By the time I graduated, one was married and the other engaged. One time, my sister's wedding trumped my graduation, and I had to take it in stride. I could tell Mom felt bad but also felt trapped Fireworks bring families together with vibrant colors and sounds. My family while I was growing up is here but now all over the place, and it makes me sad.
"Fine, yeah." Del hangs up the phone, squeezing me against him more. "I told them where we are sitting. They can find us. I'm not pushing through this madness to try to find everyone. I'm not putting you in the craziness either." I must've been hardcore in my head because I didn't hear him say that at all or to whomever he was talking. "This looks like a decent spot and less people-y." He found a spot toward the back, right in front of the dunes. It was a little darker and a lot less crowded, so they would never be able to find us. Wonder if that was what he was going for. "Sorry I don't have a blanket; that was Sass's job."
"Hey, when did sand ever bother me? It's no big deal. At least this sand is softer and drier and will wipe off easier." Sand is the least of my worries. The main worry at this moment is how are we going to sit. Sit side by side? Me in front of him? Or sitting wherever with a lot of room in between us? "I am mad that they lost us, and we won't be watching the show all together. They drive me crazy at times," I say, trying to find a good spot for my stuffed dog and me.
"I know they've always done that to you." He chuckles a little like he's remembering a past memory, and then his hand reaches out to mine as he sits down in the sand. Linking my fingers in between his, I still don't know how we are sitting. Of all the things to stress me out, it's always the small minute situations that do it. He must sense my nervous indecision on where to sit because the next thing that happens seriously takes my breath away. He opens his bent legs up more, points in between them, and says, "Sit."
Demanding much? But oh my god, I'll obey no matter what he says. "Okay," I say all breathy back like we just separated from a hardcore make out session. The smug smile he shoots back at me says he knows what that demand did to me.
Of course, I sit but keep some space between us. Maybe one day our relationship will allow me to be comfortable enough to let myself go limp against his body. My back can mold to his front as if we are one person, and I can caress his calves mindlessly while we watch TV or whatever.
Right now, though, my back is ramrod straight, and I'm trying not to move a muscle. I probably didn't sit this straight in school. I wrap my arms around my bent knees to keep my hands from unconsciously touching his legs. I can feel how anxious they are to touch him, and my mind is having a hard time reining my hands in.
The ocean is a magical place to be, even in the dark. Hearing the waves crash along the shoreline hypnotizes you into a calm, peaceful state. The dark of night makes it that much more mysterious and calming. So, calming, in fact, that I never see the little kid barely pass us, while kicking up all kinds of sand in my face. Then he tries to take my stuffed dog away with him. Oh no, buddy, that was won for me with a ton of hard effort. "Mine," he says. "Sorry," the mother says at the same time. She grabs her son, and I grab my dog. She gives me a "I'm sorry, what can I do?" look and keeps on following behind the little brat.
"Jesus, are you okay? Let me see." Del grabs my shoulders, pulls me around and starts brushing off all the sand on me. "The mother at least could've said something or tried to stop him,” he says, still brushing away at me and not really talking to me, but to himself.
"I'm good," I try to tell him. "Don't worry about it. I saw him coming at the last minute and closed my eyes." Sand in your eyes is never a pleasant experience.
"I was
a little worried that he was going to start to fight you over the dog, and I was going to have to pull you two apart. The look you gave him when he touched the dog was priceless and made the mother worry for her son's life."
I start to laugh at his replay of events and how right he is. I would've thrown down with that little boy to keep what was won for me. Petty might not be a good look, but I'm owning it for right now.
"I know, but you won it for me," I sigh, lying on his front but in a sitting up position. Every time I try to move away or move in general, he moves a body part that keeps me right where he wants me to be.
Sweeping my hair off my left shoulder, he whispers, "I know. I'd win you a thousand more to keep the happy look on your face."
Smiling up at him, the need to have his lips on mine is so strong that I'm taking the wheel. Pushing off of him, I am now sort of on top. Now dominating him, the heat I see behind his eyes builds my confidence up even more. I want to rub my face up and down on his face and feel his skin right up against my skin. Figure out if this new hair everywhere on his face is soft or coarse against me.
"Someone might see us, sweetheart," he says, looking up at me. Instantly my confidence is gone, and the need to hide is at the top of the list. Heat coats my face from the neck up, and I can even feel my ears burning. Doubt is a serious emotion that can take over instantly and buries deep in your subconscious. It's spreading like wildfire in mine right this second.
"No, stop, sweetheart." There he goes again as he uses a word of endearment while saying he doesn't want anyone to see us kiss or whatever. "Do not pull away from me. I didn't mean it like that." Staring into his eyes, the worry I see calms the storm brewing inside my head. Not sure if I completely believe him, but he's never lied to me before. Why would he start now?
The fireworks must know we need a distraction from our stare down because, of course, they start lighting up the sky now. Too bad they didn't start five minutes before because this whole awkward exchange probably wouldn't be happening right now. Pretty, vibrant colors coat the darkness, and all we can hear around us are "oohs" and "ahhs."
"The ones that sound like they are crackling are my favorite," I say as they happen every so often. I love how they light up gold and then crackle all the way down. Always did wonder how they made that happen.
"I know, Mags. Even though we haven't been around each other much in the last few years, I remember everything, especially since you say this every time."
"I know, but it's true. What is your favorite kind? Don't think I've ever heard you pick one." Learning new pieces to his puzzle excites me. I would hold all his pieces if he would trust me enough.
"Seriously, I could take or leave fireworks," he says.
What? Is he kidding me right now? How is that even possible?
"Alright, don't have a coronary over what I just said. Good lord, woman, your eyes became twice the size of what they normally are. They don't really do anything for me. I like the family time and the colors, but I still feel eh about them."
"I don't know if we can be friends anymore. This really could fall under betrayal, a secret that should've stayed a secret." I start to pull away for added effect.
All of a sudden, he pushes me off of him, not hard, but I still fall back on my butt in shock. Didn't expect that. "Ah, so let's continue to watch the show. Sorry if I…"
"Mags?”
"Yeah?"
"Get back between my legs. I know how your jokes have a way of coming out poorly and almost sound insulting. Also, I think the grand finale is my favorite part with all the flashing lights and booms. Gets your heart revved up and leaves you on a nice high."
Another piece of him, all for me.
"I hate you, and my jokes aren't all bad; I was giving you a hard time. There's a difference," I say, shoving his leg with my upper body. I never expected any of this to happen tonight. Somehow the universe took my daydream from today and said, "Here, you deserve this night." At midnight our lives probably will go back to the way they were, and I might not see Del for another so many months, but I'm soaking up every, flirty-banter minute of it.
"You always give me a hard time, and it's one of my favorite things about you. Pay attention now, the finale should be coming up soon." As soon as he says this, the flashing lights start with intense, deep booms. The blasts are so great, I can feel them in my soul. The finale, of course, is one of my favorite parts too. Such a strong climax, and then it just ends, no sweet nothings to help you come down from your high of the night.
"Screw it," I whisper.
"What?" Del whispers back.
The noise right now is so intense that hearing anything seems impossible, but I guess if you are Del you would hear my tiny whisper. Turning my head up toward his ear I whisper again, "Screw it." Putting my right hand on his cheek, I graze my lips over his cheek and a corner of his lips. So lightly I'm not a hundred percent sure I even touched his face. This is the ride I wanted to ride from the beginning, and damn it, I'm ending this night on a high note.
When he angles his face down toward me, giving me more access to his lips, I thought my hormones were going to explode right then and there. They are soft, and I can feel the ends of his facial hair tickling me. I've never kissed a man with this much facial hair before, and I love it. The tickling is exciting a whole new level of sensory for me, or it could be because I'm finally kissing my long-time crush. It has nothing to do with that at all, yeah right. I don't think either one of us has moved since my lips fully covered his.
Is this very intimate? No, but I seriously could not stop my body if my brain wanted to. The beach is my absolute calm, peaceful place. No matter the mood I'm in when I arrive, I always leave calmer and way more relaxed. Most of the time I don't even care about my problems after sitting here in the sand by the water. So, it is kind of fitting for our very first kiss ever to happen at my favorite place in the world.
Light pecking is all he allows, though. Even when I try to separate his lips with my tongue, he keeps pulling away to not let it happen. Del is being one hundred percent a gentleman right now, and I'm loving it and hating it all at the same time. His kisses are chaste, with caring caresses over my lips, cheeks, and even my forehead a time or two. His hands, though, are being a bit bad in where they are touching--up and down, over my arms, down my back, and even my sides where his thumbs have brushed my side boob. The first time it happened, my mind deemed the move an accident. The second time, I moaned like a desperate woman in heat, needing to be touched.
Taking his breath and giving him, mine makes me feel like a queen. Yes, I've kissed guys before, but this is so completely different than kissing some hot guy for the evening. My body is alive like it's never been alive before this moment. How could anyone compare to this man, and how is he making me feel this way? Rubbing my hands up and down his back, I can feel how shallow and fast his breaths are coming now. I am making him come undone, and I want to unravel him until there is nothing left. I will be the only one who can put him back together.
"Sweetheart." The word comes out muffled as he continues to kiss across my face. "We have to stop, baby. I don't want everyone to see you excited and giving like this." He brushes the back of his hand across my face. "Plus, we need to talk. I will always respect you and try to treat you right." Sighing is all I can give back.
If he would ask me to marry him after that little speech, I would say yes, right here and right now. I understand how people can make irrational decisions while in the heat of passion, and all we have done is some light kissing, not even making out.
Grabbing my dog and my hand, he hauls us off the ground. "I'll call Sass and let her know I'll be driving you home. It's going to be a mess anyways trying to get out of here and to the cars. No need to try and track them down. I got you."
"Okay, I trust you; you know that."
7
"I am so glad to be riding in an actual car now, well, truck, but you know what I mean." I have always been a truck kind of girl
, and Del has always had a truck of some kind. Check off another reason why I've been into him for so long.
"I've seen you drool over a truck or two before, so I absolutely know what you mean. Wait until I get my new exhaust for this bad boy. You'll never want to leave it again," he says and then takes his eyes off the road to wink at me. Jesus, he knows me too well.
I try to scoff at him without laughing, but who am I kidding? A loud, purring truck has always revved my engine. See what I did there? I crack my own self up sometimes. "It’s not my fault that every man in my life has had a truck. Dad's truck is my favorite. It's so beat up, but he always took me for rides around in that thing. Drove my mom and sisters crazy with embarrassment."
Del proceeds to grab my hand that is lying on the middle console and starts stroking his over the back of it. Silence fills the truck up now, and I feel like I might have said something wrong. I'm still tingly all over, and my heart, I swear, is still beating at a higher rate than normal; but a little wedge of doubt has set into my belly.
He did grow up with my family and me, so none of what I say about them is new to him. My parents love Del's family and everyone in it. They even cheered George on at some of his baseball games, especially the big ones. Dad has followed George's career since he hit middle school and started breaking records. Let's also not forget, he lived in a house full of girls, so he needed male interactions from time to time.
I can feel my eyelids start to get heavy from the hypnotic motion of his thumb. The truck runs so smoothly on the highway; it's like we are running on air. "Did you ever believe you would own something so nice like this in your life?" Sort of a weird question, I know. Well, very random to say the least.
