by Diana Jean
Yuriko's stomach didn’t untwist and her heart felt a little bit heavier. She wasn’t sure what she had expected from Kathleen. In fact, she might have expected worse. That Kathleen would be disgusted by her or hate her. Maybe she should be happy that Kathleen didn't remember it well. Sometimes Yuriko felt like she had imagined it all in some drunken hallucination. It was probably for the best they move on.
She ignored the ache in her chest. “Yeah, that sounds good.”
Kathleen’s lips twitched into almost a smile. Then she sank back into her pillow, closing her eyes. “You know, Medical can make this super high-tech brain scanner that can read your mind and make you a perfect match. But maybe they should put their efforts towards killing stupid colds.” She took another sip of the water and put it aside. She hadn’t even drunk half of it. “Of course, their cortex scan seems lousy too.”
“That would hurt Ai’s feelings.”
Kathleen snorted. “Computer programs don’t get hurt feelings. They only pretend to.”
Yuriko kind of felt like her own feelings were hurt. It was ridiculous. She knew Ai looked like her and acted like her. That didn’t mean she was … It was as Kathleen said, constantly, the cortex scan was wrong. Ai had been a mistake. Now maybe Yuriko had gotten her own feelings a little mixed up, because she felt like Kathleen was saying she was a mistake too.
She grabbed the jelly drink and handed it to Kathleen. “Try it, it’s good for you.”
Kathleen looked at it dubiously. “Looks like a kid’s juice box.” She tasted it. “Is it Jell-O?”
“For decades businessmen and women have been swearing by them. Supposed to be healthy.”
Kathleen grimaced. “Kind of tastes like grass.”
“That means it’s healthy.”
Kathleen pushed it aside, lying back down. Her eyes were closing. “Japanese are crazy. It tastes bad, so that means it’s healthy.” She yawned and shivered. “Ai even said she would need to tie some leeks around my neck.” She looked at Yuriko, eyes unfocused. “I think she was joking. I’m not even sure what leeks are.”
Yuriko smiled, reaching over to help pull up the covers on Kathleen’s bed. “My mom used to do that to me. Don’t worry; I’ll keep Ai away from the leeks.”
Kathleen reached out, touching Yuriko’s wrist. “Hey, thanks for coming over.” Her voice faded, eyes closed. “And for the medicine and gross jelly … ”
She was asleep. Yuriko took her hand, warm and clammy, and tucked it under the covers. Kathleen didn’t even stir as Yuriko stood up, arranging the water and jelly drink to be in closer reaching distance. She pushed the trash bin next the bed and looked around the room. There were a few pieces of garbage, which she picked up and threw away. She folded the few clothes lying around and stashed them in the closet. On the shelving in the closet, she spotted a few brightly colored magazines. Impulsively, she picked one up, surprised to find it was a girls’-love dōjinshi.
Yuriko glanced over to confirm that Kathleen was still sleeping, then she started flipping through it. It was littered with broken English translations written on sticky notes. It was a fairly tame story, nothing too raunchy or exciting. However Yuriko was surprised to see it. Was Kathleen into manga or anime? Did she ship these two characters?
Yuriko looked at the front cover. She had read some popular manga before, but she hadn’t read the one these characters came from. She had the sudden impulse to pick it up and give it a try.
Yuriko stood, taking the dōjinshi with her. In the kitchen, Ai was standing at the stove, watching a pot of boiling rice. She looked at Yuriko and the dōjin in her hand. She raised an eyebrow.
Yuriko pretended to not be affected by her look. “I saw Kathleen was practicing translation. I figured I could give her some input.”
Ai grinned. “I see.”
Yuriko ignored her and sat at the table, fishing in her purse for a pen. Kathleen, like all beginners, was a fairly literal translator. However, from the little she had done, it was a pretty good job. Yuriko just made a few notes to clarify strange phrases or vocabulary that Kathleen was obviously confused by.
She started when Ai sat next to her, pushing a bowl of okayu toward her. Yuriko frowned. “Shouldn’t you be giving this to Kathleen?”
Ai shrugged. “She’s sleeping and I needed to practice making it.” She nodded. “Come on, tell me what you think.”
Yuriko stirred it, watching the steam curl off it. “Why would you need to practice? Can’t you, like, download the recipe?”
“Just because I know exactly how to make it, doesn’t mean I can execute it. I’d think you’d understand that, Quality Control.”
Yuriko took a small bite. It tasted fine, not too salty, and the rice porridge was very soft. It wasn’t something she’d eat unless she wasn’t feeling good. “Yeah, but this is okayu, not teaching a robot to walk for the first time.”
Ai just smiled, looking to Yuriko’s corrections in the dōjin. “She’s a quick learner, isn’t she?”
Yuriko nodded, hesitating. “Does she … read stuff like this very often?”
“I got them for her, if that is what you are asking.” Ai paused, touching the edges of the papers. “I didn’t know she had been trying to read them. Must have done it while I was recharging or something.”
Yuriko tapped on her wrist. It was after ten. She hadn’t realized so much time had passed. “When was the last time you recharged?”
Ai sighed. “Well, considering Kathleen woke up at 3 AM to vomit, my last cycle was cut a little short.”
“You should power down. I’ll stay here for a bit in case she needs anything.”
Ai blinked. “You wouldn’t mind?”
Yuriko didn’t much like that look. It was too innocent. “It would be much more trouble if you overheated or had another breakdown from too much data input.”
Ai laughed. “Well, since you insist so nicely.” She stood, making her way to the corner of the room. There she knelt, closed her eyes, and went silent. If Yuriko didn’t know better, she would say Ai just looked like she was resting. Yuriko knew that it would take an emergency or a voice command from Kathleen to rouse her again.
Yuriko decided she would turn on the TV, keeping the volume low. She thought that maybe tonight she would watch a little anime.
• • •
Yuriko woke up to the sound of retching.
She rubbed her head, ear hurting from lying on the table. The TV seemed too bright in the dark room and she hadn’t even realized that she had fallen asleep. Yuriko stood up, trying to shrug off her drowsiness, and walked into Kathleen’s room. She turned on the light and saw that Kathleen was kneeling on the floor, hiding her face in the trash bin.
“Hey, how are you feeling?”
Kathleen coughed. “How does it look?” Her voice was low and she shivered. Her hair looked lank and greasy and she leaned against the side of the bed, clutching the trash bin.
Yuriko, a little more awake now, went to grab some more anti-nausea medication. Returning to the room, she knelt beside Kathleen, taking her shoulders. “Come on. Let me help you into bed.”
Kathleen moaned. “ … feel gross.”
Yuriko moved aside the trash bin. Kathleen hadn’t vomited, so she must have been dry heaving. Yuriko wrapped her arms more securely around her, helping her back into the covers. “Is it just your stomach?” She handed over the pills, but Kathleen only gripped them loosely in one fist.
“Just … ” She winced. “Head hurts. Hot.”
Yuriko touched her forehead. She didn’t need a proper thermometer to feel that Kathleen was burning up. She handed over the water. “Here, drink this and take those. I’ll go find something to reduce your fever.”
Kathleen knocked aside the water, sitting up and pressing her head into Yuriko’s side. “No … just … stop moving, the room is spinning.”
Yuriko bent to pick up the water, making Kathleen moan. “Okay, I’ll stop. But you have to take the pills and drink this, at least.�
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Kathleen sighed heavily, moving her head enough to take a couple sips of the water with the medicine. Then she buried her face back into Yuriko’s side. It didn’t look very comfortable, neck at an odd angle, body curled and tangled in the sheets. One of her hands gripped Yuriko’s shirt.
Yuriko sat there in silence for a minute, just posed on the edge of Kathleen’s bed. Then, because it felt strange to be doing nothing, she lifted one hand and ran it through Kathleen’s tangled hair, moving it from her damp face.
This simple contact felt good. She had missed Kathleen the past few days. Missed her more than just drunken kissing or groping. She sighed, letting herself enjoy Kathleen’s hair between her fingers. Even sweaty and tangled.
Kathleen opened one eye to look up at Yuriko.
“I’m tired.”
“Then you should sleep.”
She grimaced. “Can’t. Room spinning, too hot.”
Yuriko, careful not to move too much, reached over and angled the fan to hit Kathleen more. “Better?”
“Yeah. Can you … talk to me … or something. Distract me … ”
Yuriko shrugged. “What do you want to talk about?”
“I dunno. Your family?”
Yuriko smiled. “My family is not that interesting.”
“Doesn’t matter.” Kathleen rubbed her face into Yuriko’s side. “Just talk.”
Yuriko looked around the room, as if it could give her inspiration. “Well, my dad was born in Milwaukee and works at a water treatment plant. He met my mother when she came to America to finish her PhD in environmental studies. She actually wanted to research the way his company used green algae to filter the water.”
“Hmm, sounds romantic.”
Even a little delirious and sick, Kathleen still managed to sound sarcastic. Yuriko smiled, running her fingers through the fine strands of hair. “My dad used to tinker with vintage cars. So that’s where I learned my love of mechanical engineering. When I was twelve, my parents got a divorce. My mother wanted to move back to Japan, to Osaka where her family was. My dad wanted me to stay in America, since I had always gone to school there. I had always spent my summers in Osaka. I decided to move with my mother.”
“That sounds rough.”
Yuriko touched the edge of Kathleen’s ear. Her eyes were still closed, voice softer. “It was very difficult, at first. While my dad tried to hide it, I think he was disappointed that I chose my mother over him. To this day, we still don’t talk that much. But I’m glad I was here for my mother. She … she always tried to give me the best, even when she was hurting.”
“She still lives in Osaka?”
“Yes. We try to call, but we usually send each other emails to stay updated.” Yuriko petted the shell of Kathleen’s ear, appreciating the softness. “She was my only friend for a long time. I think she sometimes worries that I can’t make friends on my own.”
Kathleen sighed deeply. “That’s stupid. You’ve got lots of friends and girlfriends.”
Yuriko smiled. “I don’t have lots of girlfriends.”
“Well, maybe not at once.”
“It’s been a long time since I’ve gone on a date.”
Kathleen moved, tilting her head, looking up at Yuriko. Her face was red and a little slick. Yuriko wiped her forehead with the edge of her sleeve. “How do you know?”
“Know what?”
“That you want to date a girl?”
Yuriko knew that Kathleen was a little feverish, very tired, and probably dehydrated. It couldn’t be a serious question. She pushed Kathleen away, pressing her into the pillows. Kathleen sighed, but didn’t seem to have any fight. When Yuriko put the bottle of water into her hands, she drank it automatically.
“How do you know when you want to date a guy?”
Kathleen shrugged, eyes closing again. “Dunno. I guess he would be cute or something. Or he would make me laugh and I’d think I’d want to be around him more often. Or something like that.”
“It’s not so different for me.”
Kathleen yawned and Yuriko tossed the empty bottle of water into the trash. “Well, maybe. But I feel like … it feels different to me … ”
Yuriko stood to turn the lights back off. Kathleen’s voice drifted back to her.
“Yuriko?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m glad you came over. I feel like … I dunno. It’s been a while … but it’s nice talking to you.”
Yuriko smiled. “Go to sleep.”
“Will I see you in the morning?” Her eyes were open again, looking at Yuriko like she was pleading.
Yuriko had a powerful urge to go back to the bed, touch her hair or take her hand. She stayed by the door. “If you like.”
Kathleen closed her eyes. “Good.”
chapter SIXTEEN
Kathleen had the strangest dream that Ai had managed to clone herself. That there were two of her, coddling and teasing. They both embraced her as she slept and all Kathleen could say is Who is the real one?
They didn’t answer.
Kathleen stepped from the shower, feeling a little lightheaded. However she was miles better than she had been just yesterday, or the day before that. Ai was waiting for her outside the bathroom and Kathleen begrudgingly let her take a temperature scan.
“Hmm, normal.”
Kathleen rolled her eyes and stepped away from Ai. “You almost sound disappointed.”
Ai snorted, pushing Kathleen to sit at the table where a bowl of rice porridge waited for her. It was all Ai insisted on feeding her for nearly three days. “I am happy that you are well. I am not happy that you wish to go into the office today.”
“Japanese business waits for no woman. I think Fukusawa is going to have a panic attack unless I come in and settle the updates with him.” She sat at the table, picking up the spoon from the bowl and browsing through the morning’s emails. The porridge, okayu, as she learned, was fairly unexciting in terms of flavor and texture. Even though it had been a full twenty-four hours since Kathleen had vomited, she still didn’t want to test her stomach. Yet, she couldn’t help dreaming about eating something more substantial, like a greasy hamburger.
Ai hovered in the kitchen, cleaning dishes. “You know, we only have ten more days left for the trial.”
Kathleen stopped, spoon halfway to her mouth. She did know that, considering how much work she needed to catch up on and all the reports and presentations she would soon have to give once Ai was disassembled for research. She had never heard Ai bring it up before. She looked over her shoulder to find Ai looking at her from the kitchen counter, as if assessing Kathleen’s reaction.
“Yes?” Kathleen answered, knowing she sounded a little meek. She just didn’t quite know what to feel at this moment. It wasn’t like she was in love with Ai or anything, but she had gotten used to her being around as someone to talk to or eat dinner with. Ai was useful, in terms of making meals and keeping Kathleen’s apartment clean. She didn’t know what it would feel like when she was gone, but then, she still had over a week left.
Ai leaned over the counter. “Well, we should do something fun this weekend.”
“Fun?”
“Yeah, go somewhere!”
Kathleen frowned. “I don’t know … ”
Ai grinned. “It doesn’t have to be far, maybe somewhere just outside of Tokyo. Like Kamakura or even Nikko.”
Kathleen turned back to her computer. She trusted Ai enough to know that she could behave properly in public and was an excellent navigator, but the truth was she had simply never left Tokyo since arriving to Japan. She still felt uncomfortable here, the place she was the most familiar. She wasn’t sure how she could handle leaving the metropolitan area and going to somewhere even just slightly more rustic.
Her silence wasn’t enough to deter Ai, who came to kneel beside her, leaning just a little too close. “Look, I’ll plan everything, okay? And we won’t have to stay overnight if you are afraid.”
Kathleen glared.
“I am not afraid. I am just very busy after being out of work for a couple days.”
Ai smiled reassuringly. “Work will understand. Obviously, you need to gain back your strength by going somewhere with fresh air. It’s totally natural!”
Kathleen bit her lip. “I didn’t make you to be some travel agent.”
“But you did make me to be able to initiate and plan dates.”
Kathleen rubbed her forehead. “Look, Ai … ” The doorbell rang and Kathleen was very grateful for the interruption. “Come in!” She ignored Ai’s pout.
Yuriko stepped inside. “Hey, ready to head out?”
Kathleen stood up, shutting down her computer and grabbing her bag. “Am I ever.” She turned to Ai, who stood and crossed her arms, glaring. “We will talk about this more later.”
Ai sighed. “Will you at least give me a kiss goodbye?”
“Since when have I ever kissed you?”
Her eyes were oddly harsh, lips tight. “Since when have you ever treated me based on the way you programmed me?”
Kathleen sighed, waving an arm. “Whatever. You know the rules.”
Ai turned away, sitting back down. “I know. Don’t leave, don’t call, don’t move, don’t breathe … ” She continued to mutter and Kathleen decided to ignore her by pushing past Yuriko to get outside.
Yuriko stared at her while she locked the door. “Is Ai supposed to throw fits?”
Kathleen sighed, walking down the stairs and away from the apartment. “Yeah, I mean if you ignore them or something they can get snippy like that.” Some of the sims Kathleen had programmed could actually get so upset that they would stop interacting with the user. While the public liked that the sims could get frustrated, they didn’t appreciate that their virtual lovers would leave them if they forgot to check in for a couple of days. Ai could throw a little tiff like that, but she was programmed to always come back to Kathleen and forgive her no matter the circumstances.
