by J. J. McAvoy
“Hmmm.” He chuckled at first before he broke out into full laughter, neither sound I had heard from him in months.
“A divorce?”
“Yes.”
He took a step back, looked at me, and then laughed again. “Odette.”
“Sir?” I did not understand why he was acting this way.
“Pardon me.” He held up his hand and tried to regain his composure. “Tell me what she said exactly—word for word.”
“She said, ‘I’m not trying to make him feel anything. I just need his signature so we can divorce,’” I repeated her words to him.
“What does she mean she is not trying to make me feel anything?” he questioned, more amused than I had seen in such a long time.
“The princess and Wolfgang were under the impression she came here to be with you and were hoping she would help lift your spirits.”
“Ahh.” He nodded, understanding now. “And what did Eliza say when she found out that was not the reason she came?”
Did he want a record of the whole conversation? From the look on his face, that was exactly what he wanted. He stood, waiting for me to tell him everything, so I did. He did not say anything until I finished.
“She does not change,” he whispered, taking the gloves out of his pockets and sliding them onto his hands. His shoulders were relaxed, his eyes soft, and the corner of his lip turned upward into a smile.
“So, when she calls—”
“She will not call tonight,” he replied, looking over at me.
“Sir?”
He put his hand on my shoulder. “That woman really is hot and cold.” He let go and walked to the doors, knocking for them to open.
What had happened?
Was this not supposed to be bad news?
Why did he seem grateful for it?
I did not understand.
I did not understand at all.
But I did have the urge to smack Wolfgang.
Chapter 4
“The evening commenced when His Royal Highness Prince Galahad entered the state dinner with his mother, Her Royal Majesty Queen Elspeth, on his right, and the Austrian prime minister, Christoph Leon, and his wife, Amelie, beside him. This, of course, was following the royal protocol of entrance. Everything about state dinners is always highly orchestrated; not a single fork is to be out of place,” the female news anchor explained.
I understood most of the words, but I still needed the subtitles. The camera panned over the ornate, white peonies spread across the U-shaped tables. I remembered when Gale gave me those flowers and told me they meant prosperity and good fortune. Everything seemed to sparkle and glisten, from the red drapes behind them to the crystal glasses to the chandeliers hung from the ceiling. But nothing looked as regal as he did standing in the center, speaking.
“Prince Galahad gave the keynote speech in which he mentioned the long history between Austria and Ersovia. This was on the heels of the Goldberger Treaties' renewal, something the late Prince Arthur had highlighted in previous speeches. Many have been worried about whether Prince Galahad would rise and fill his brother’s role as Adelaar. This, along with rumors of the king’s illness circling and the king’s notable absence since his son’s funeral, Prince Galahad was a welcome sight of stability tonight. Sources close to the palace have remarked that the days of the party prince are long gone—”
Flipping the channel, I searched for a movie to watch. I was trying not to focus on him. I tried to relax and just get back to where I was this morning before Eliza, Wolfgang, and Iskandar came and messed up everything. Now look at me. I was sitting in bed, watching him on television with wine. Iskandar had told me to call, but I couldn’t. It was too soon and—
“No, it is fine. Do not worry about her.” A voice came from the living room.
Rising from the bed, I slid open the double doors but didn’t see anyone. However, I still heard another voice.
“Sir, this is—”
Turning the corner, I saw him. “Gale?”
There he was at my front door, dressed in the same suit, minus the sash, gloves, and medals on his chest. His hair was still the same color brown with the same curls, his eyes still the same blue-green, his jawline now clean-shaven, and he stood tall and proud as ever. He looked even more handsome than he had on the television and also more tired. But still, it was him. He was standing right in front of my now partially opened door. Still outside of it was Iskandar, and one other man I did not know who was dressed similarly to Iskandar, so I assumed he was a guard, too. He gave me a strange look but didn’t say a word.
“That is all for now,” Gale said to them, but his eyes never left mine.
Iskandar and the other man bowed before closing the door. Gale turned fully to me, his eyes looking from my naked feet before getting back to my eyes. I had so many things I wanted to say. But I couldn’t comprehend how he was in front of me right now.
“Is there wine?” he asked, stepping in farther.
And that was when the words came back to me. “We haven’t seen each other in months, and the first thing you ask me about is wine?” I couldn’t believe it.
“You’re right. That was rude,” he said gently, walking up to me.
“Being rude isn’t the point, Gale. How could you—”
“My first question should have been, how are you, Odette?” he whispered, placing his hand on my cheek, and it was like he had shocked me. Electricity flowed throughout my veins, and the hair on my arms stood up, so I had to step back away from his touch.
“What do you think you are doing?” I snapped.
He dropped his hands, his gaze softening. “Can we save our argument for the morning? It has been a very long day, and I really need some sleep.”
“What?”
He didn’t answer me; instead, he took off his jacket and walked to the bedroom.
“What are you doing?” I rushed to stand in front of him. “If you want to sleep, go back to your palace!”
“My wife isn’t in the palace. She is here, and I can hardly let her spend her first night here alone, now can I?” he said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Like oh, of course, you shouldn’t look directly at the sun.
“So, there is the wine.” He snickered and walked around me again into the bedroom, tossing his coat onto the ottoman at the end of the bed, grabbing my unfinished glass to drink from it.
“Gale!”
“Hmm?” He looked at me, still drinking.
He—I—What was he doing right now? Breathe, Odette. Breathe. “Gale, you cannot just break into my bedroom, demand to sleep, and drink my wine like nothing has happened—like we don’t need to talk.”
“I know we have to talk. I would just prefer to do that after I have slept,” he stated, taking a seat by the side of the bed, already kicking off his shoes.
“I do not care what you prefer!”
“Yes, I am well aware.” He snickered now, lying back on the mattress. “Which is why you flew thousands of miles to divorce me.”
“Exactly! Now, please get off my bed.”
“Our bed,” he corrected, closing his eyes.
“No, my bed! As in, I paid for the room.”
“Our bed as in, husband and wife, what’s yours is mine.”
I bit my lip and stretched out my fingers to keep from strangling him. “If you agree to a divorce, we will not be that anymore. And what’s mine is mine again.”
He did not answer.
“Gale?”
“ZZZZzzz,” he pretended to snore.
Marching up to him, I pinched his nose and put my hand over his mouth. His eyes snapped open, and he ripped my hands away.
“Hey! Attempted murder of a royal is considered high treason here! It is the only law that still carries a death penalty!” he said seriously.
“Even for the wife of a royal?” I shot back.
“Yes, you can only be shown mercy by the sovereign.” He held my hands tighter and pulled me onto the bed
beside him. “However, that can get complicated, so let us handle this ourselves.”
“Brilliant, I want a divorce.”
His eyes narrowed, and he eyed me carefully. “Fine, but how much are you giving me in spousal support?”
I felt my jaw detach from the rest of my face. “How much am I giving you? You are a freaking prince.”
A wicked grin spread on his face. “And so? You are a billionaire heiress. You cannot just expect me to take nothing. I am at least entitled to half.”
“You—You gold digger.”
He shrugged. “I will tell the judge you knew that before you married me.”
I yanked my arms away, wanting to smack the hell out of him. But I took another deep breath. Maybe he was drunk already. Maybe I was dreaming. Maybe I had fallen asleep in front of the television, and this was just my mind playing tricks on me. Either way, I wanted to keep as calm and rational as possible.
“Gale.”
“Yes, Odette,” he said my name with a smile.
Ignoring him, I went on, “When we got married, it was a spur-of-the-moment thing. Everything was different. We were just going to be a duke and duchess. Come out for the press, then hide away. But then the world shifted under our feet. It is not our fault. These last few months, I have been thinking and—”
“The vows I made,” he interrupted me, taking my hand back into his. “Has the time apart made you forget them?”
“Gale—”
“‘Odette, because of you, I laugh, I smile, and I dare to dream of a future that is worthy of poets. The reasons that brought us together weren’t the best or the most romantic, but I am glad for them nevertheless, and I swear to you, from now until the day I die, your dreams are my dreams. Your joy is my joy. Your pain is my pain, and I will never betray you. You are now my body, my mind, my soul, and my heart. You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars,” he repeated, gripping me tighter. “I told you I would send for you when things calmed down. But they never did, Odette. Every day, every hour, and every second, something was calling for the Adelaar’s attention, and I was the one everyone was looking at for answers. I followed your advice and took it one problem at a time. Why? Because I trusted you would keep your promise. Do you remember what that was?”
I didn’t answer.
“I asked you, ‘Promise me you will be patient with me on the days I am not so romantic,’ and you said?”
I hung my head. “I said, ‘I promise.’ But I promised to moments not months.”
“Months are just a measure of time to record moments.”
“Gale. I’m serious.”
He frowned, sighing. “And I am serious as well.”
“It’s been months. It’s not like we can just pick up where we left off.”
“Why?”
“What do you mean why—”
“Nothing about how I felt about you, how I still feel about you, has changed, Odette. Nothing.”
“Well, my feelings have changed!” That’s a lie. “And my feelings are what matters to me. I’m moving on from all of this. From you. I want my life back now.”
He stared at me for a long time. Was it a long time? I wasn’t sure. Staring into his eyes, I wasn’t sure of anything but the fact that my heart kept shaking. And the more he stared, the more I felt...weak.
“So,” I went on as he was silent, “please don’t make this hard for me, Gale. We will just go as we have been going on for the last few months. Our own way. You’re a great guy, so I’m sure you’ll find—”
“Are you running because you are scared?”
“I am not scared!” I said quickly, even though that wasn’t completely true.
“Odette,” he whispered, frowning slightly, shifting to move closer to me. “I know you are scared because I am also scared.”
Our eyes met again, and now, because we were so close, I could see the lines under his eyes. Now that he was this close to me, he looked like a completely different man on the television.
“I am sorry I did not call or write. Truly, I am sorry. It was wrong of me. I should have done better. I will do better. I swear,” he said and placed his warm hand on my cheek again. “The world might not know you are my wife, but you are, and I am thrilled you are here with me again.”
“You cannot just say that and make everything go away.”
“Then tell me what to say or do, and I will say and do it.”
“You...” My throat burned all of a sudden, and the words were stuck, struggling to come up for some strange reason. “When I married you, I was just barely okay with the idea of being some duchess of a country I did not know. Now you are a future king. I want to say the world is made of rainbows. I want to say sure we can just go on like we were. But we can’t—”
“So you are not against me. You are against my title?” Gale replied, placing his forehead on mine. “So that means you know there is still something between us, Odette. You feel it—even after so long. I feel it, even if I do not understand it entirely. I do not understand you entirely, but I want to. I want you here. I know your fears. And I know if you truly wanted to leave me, if you truly did not want me, you would not be looking at me with such sad eyes right now.”
He was touching my face, but I felt as though he was holding my heart. And it wasn’t fair. I had spent months building the strength, securing my emotions so that I could do this. Yet in minutes, he was breaking down all my walls and efforts.
“We have spent more time away from each other than we have spent together—”
“That can change.”
“Gale, what if I am a different person from who you—”
“It has not been that long. People do not change easily, even if they want to. You are still the same you that I remember. I feel it.”
“There are other people you could—”
“If I wanted to be with someone else, I would not be here.”
I sighed in frustration, hitting my hand against his chest. “At least give me a chance to finish.”
“Why, so you can lie to yourself and me?”
I didn’t speak.
“Odette, tell me your fears.”
“What if it’s just you?”
“It’s not,” he said so confidentially it was annoying.
“I don’t feel anything for you anymore! Sorry! I’m Odette the Coldheart—”
He kissed me before I could finish, and I felt my hand shake. Before I could push him away or kiss him back, he pulled back. “That was a lie, Odette, but it still hurt to hear, I must admit.”
“Gale, please...” Please, don’t pull me back to you. Why couldn’t I just say that? I hung my head, whispering what I knew to be true. “They will rip me apart, Gale. I am not a queen.”
I bit back the tears in my eyes.
“They will try, but I will not let them close enough to do so,” he replied, gently lifting my chin back up. “Because you are my queen,”
“My parents weren’t royal, yet I grew up watching as people who did not even know us tore into my mother. Every time we went someplace, people gossiped. That is why I have stage fright. When I was a kid, I didn’t understand. But then I got older, and the constant judging, the constant comments, the constant attacks, and every time cameras flashed in my face, I froze. Every time I got on the stage or spoke in public, I could hear their comments. Sometimes, I could handle it, and other times, it paralyzed me. That was the side effect of being around my parents. What happens when I am in the center of everything? It is going to be worse.”
“It is.” He let go of my face and leaned back, looking me over. “I do not know what to say to that because you are right. It will be chaos. But at least we will be in the center of it together, and we can make it our eye of the storm, so when it thunders, when the skies darken, and the winds howl, we will be calm and will find peace there, blissfully ignorant of everything else.”
“I can’t—”
“Odette, do you want to look back one day and see that y
ou did not do what you wanted to do or be with who you wanted to be with because of the comments of others?” His eyes were glazed over...damn him and his stupid eyes. “I do not want to.”
“Gale.” Ugh, he drove me crazy. “I thought you said you did not know what to say?”
“It came to me,” he said, wiping the tears from my eyes. “So, do not give up on us yet. We have barely even started.”
Why?
“Why can’t you just let us go? Why do you want to do this?”
He looked me over, his eyes filled with something else now—sadness. “Since my brother died, every second of every day, I have been the Adelaar to everyone, even my mother. I’ve wanted to be just Gale again. I have been trying for months to be me in this role, only to be beaten down. And then you just show up, and all of a sudden, I feel like me again. Even now, as you try to run away from me, as you lie and tell me you do not care about me, I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time. When I found out you were here, it was as if fireworks had been set off inside me. I rushed through the dinner tonight, as you were all I could think about. I would have run through the palace and into a taxi if Iskandar didn’t talk some sense into me. I could not wait to come and see you. So, I am holding on, Odette. I will not let you burn to keep me warm, but I will burn everything else so you can stay. So stay.”
He did not give me a chance to answer. His lips met mine, and I found myself melting into him. The little fight I had vanished, and I could still taste my wine on his tongue. His arms wrapped around me, pulling me toward him. Turning us both onto the bed, he kissed down the side of my face, his lips on my neck.
“Say you will stay with me?” he whispered into my ear before biting the lobe. “Promise you will stay with me.”
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I hugged him.
I’m so stupid.
This was totally not a breakup.
The one thing I’d come to do and I’d failed...just like my mom thought I would.
When I got attached, I really didn’t know how to detach myself.
“You have to say it, Odette.” He hugged me tightly. “I’m begging you; please say it.”
