I smile thinking about her watching me all that time as intently as I’ve been watching her. I can’t help but feel like maybe she had it a little easier though. No matter what she’s doing that catches my eye my mind keeps resorting back to sex. She licks her lips and I immediately want her lips on my cock. She shifts in her seat and I hope it’s because I’ve done something to make her feel hot and bothered. The thought excites me more than I realize. I adjust myself under the table as I feel my jeans become a little tighter.
I turn my attention back to my cards. Fucking relax, Conner. Shit man! You’re acting like a high school kid who just got his first handy. I try hard to focus on something else. Anything else besides her plump wet lips… her firm supple breasts… Damn it, Conner! Stop it! Is this what it was like for her all those years? No wonder she felt so torn apart inside! I’ll be lucky if I can hold out for a week feeling the way I feel and being this close to her. I don’t know how the hell she managed it for years!
“Hey, where’s Ian at?” Bobby asks, pulling me from my thoughts. Brooke answers immediately.
“He’s at a dinner with Chief Joe and the mayor tonight. He’s gonna try to make it after if he can.” She looks at me from the corner of her eye. She probably wants to judge my reaction. When I remain calm she offers me a small smile. Outside of my half-naked comment from earlier, I think I’ve been doing pretty well trying to play nice with that douchebag. A lump rises in my throat at the thought of them together.
That’s been the hardest part through all of this. I can pretend to be okay with being her friend. I can fantasize about her and keep my fantasies in check when we’re together. I can be around her for as long as she needs or wants me to. It doesn’t bother me to be around her. It bothers me to see her with him. And pretending it doesn’t has been the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. But it’s what she says she wants and all I want is for her to be happy.
****
We make it through our third game of Euchre and Bobby and I decide to throw in the towel. I don’t know how Brooke and Gabe beat us all the time but seeing her smiling and gloating makes me laugh. It’s worth the assbeating. I push my chair away from the table and make my way to the bar to get our next round of drinks. As I wait for Marcy, I hear it and a warmth rushes over me. Yes!
I spin around and Brooke is already looking at me from the table. A large smile spread across her face. She’s shaking her head no but her expression says something completely different. I make my way over to her, smoothly rolling my hips and swinging them from side to side as I cross the room to where she’s sitting. She throws her head back in laughter. God, I love that sound. It makes me laugh too.
I flash her a sexy smile, hold my hand out, and wait for her to take it. She rolls her eyes and shakes her head and I know she’s about to give in. She lets out a sigh then puts her hands in mine. I immediately yank her out of her seat and onto the dance floor. I spin her around. Into me and away from me and back into me again as I sing the lyrics back to her, “And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while. Cause girl you’re amazing, just the way you are.”
She smiles and laughs bashfully back at me. Then starts dancing to her own rhythm and singing along with me. To see her in her element like this is the highlight of my night. Our song, this dance, each look, each touch. All of it just seems so much more meaningful now that I’ve realized I love her, too.
Seven
Brooke
By the time the song ends I am completely breathless. And I don’t know if it’s from laughing so hard, singing so loudly, or dancing so much. Probably a combination of all three. Conner spins me one last time before releasing my hand and announcing, “Okay. I’ve gotta go take a leak.” I shake my head and laugh at him again. I haven’t felt that carefree in a while. Especially not with him.
It almost feels like now that I have Ian I don’t have to feel worried about mixed signals within my relationship with Conner. Conner knows where I stand with him. He knows I want to be with Ian and he is okay with just being friends. And for the first time in forever I’m finally starting to feel like maybe I can be okay with just being friends too.
I make my way back to my seat and fill my glass with the pitcher of beer left on our table. The rest of the guys are still sitting at the table and Andy has now shown up and is sitting too. Bobby is in the middle of retelling a story from one of Andy’s first calls he was ever on with us. It includes Andy being so nervous that he had to throw up on the street before following his orders.
This is pretty typical of an anniversary celebration. Everyone takes turns telling embarrassing stories about you when you first started but it's all in good fun. I smile and lean on the table as I listen to Bobby tell his story. Then I suddenly feel a tight squeeze on my arm. I turn quickly to see Ian staring back at me, eyes burning with anger. What the hell? When did he even get here?
“Get the fuck up,” he says quietly but firmly. And looks around the room to make sure he hasn’t made a scene. I try to pull from his grasp but he doesn’t loosen his hold on my arm. I can smell the bourbon on his breath. Is he drunk?
“Ian that hurts. Let go.” I tell him. Also trying to keep my voice quiet so as to not make a scene. He yanks hard on my arm and jerks me off of the table almost knocking me to the floor before finally letting go. I stumble a few steps before catching my balance. “Woah, there, Brooke. You okay?” Bobby asks, eyeing me curiously. I don’t think he saw what actually happened and I can probably play this off as if I fell.
“Yeah,” I reply, laughing softly. “Just one too many I guess. I’m gonna go grab some air.”
“Let me help you,” Ian says sternly, taking my arm again. His grip is even tighter than before as he leads me out the door. Once outside Ian uses his grip on my arm to rip me around to face him. My heart starts pounding hard in my chest. Oh shit. He’s pissed. I begin to panic. I don’t want to be out here alone with him.
“What the fuck were you thinking?” He begins screaming at me only inches from my face. I raise my arm in self-defense.
“I don’t know what you mean. Ian, what’s wrong?” My voice is trembling with fear. My body starts to shake as he leads me further and further from the front door. I need to calm him down.
“What’s wrong? What’s Wrong?! Are you fucking serious, Brooke?” He screams back as he slams my body against the brick wall of the building. I feel drops of spit fly from his mouth and land on my face as he continues screaming. I squeeze my eyes closed and listen as his words begin slurring together. “You come here and let him rub his fucking hands all over you after I’ve given you how many warnings. I told you I won’t deal with it. I told you that you are mine!” He growls at me while squeezing tightly to both of my shoulders. “What part of that did you not understand?”
My heart is racing. I just need to get back inside. I need to get to Conner. I start slowly trying to creep my way back toward the door. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” he growls.
“Ian, stop. Please. You’re drunk. Let’s just go back inside and talk about this.” I take another step back toward the front door and put my hands up at him in defense. I can feel the tears starting to build in my eyes. I can’t remember ever being this terrified before in my life.
“Talk about it?” A menacing laugh escapes his lips. “Now you wanna talk about it?” He starts moving toward me. “Yeah, we can talk about it. But not here.”
A pathetic squeal slips from my mouth as he grabs me hard by my hair and starts pulling me toward his car. “Ian, stop. Ian. Please. Please, don’t do this.” Tears are now flowing freely down my cheeks as I continue trying to resist him but he doesn’t seem phased in the least. It’s as if he can’t even hear me anymore. He simply continues his rant.
“And when we’re all done talking. I’ll be coming back here to beat the shit out of that fucking loser you can’t seem to keep your sleazy fucking hands off of.”
He gets me to his car door and turns his back to
me to open it. I am not getting in that car with him. I can feel my fear turn to rage and adrenaline in an instant. Like my fight or flight instinct has just kicked in. When he turns to face me again I take the heel of my hand and thrust it forcefully upward into his nose. He covers his nose and bends over slightly. I hear him groan and he releases his grip on my hair.
I try to move away from him quickly but as he stands he swings his arm around connecting his knuckles across the right side of my face. “You stupid bitch!” is all I hear before the world turns black for just a second. I feel myself spin and fall to the ground with all the force of his back hand behind it. All I can do is lay there on the ground holding my face.
****
Conner
I look in the mirror and smile at my reflection. I feel so good right now. And I couldn’t stop smiling if I wanted to. For a moment I think I might be buzzed but then I realize I’ve only had a few beers. No, it’s her. She’s the one making me feel like this. I wash my hands then fuss around with my hair for a minute. I push it one way then the other. Ugh, stop it! It’s fine.
I brace myself with both hands on either side of the sink and stare back at myself again. Not like it matters what my hair looks like. She chose Ian. A lump begins to form in my throat at the thought. She said she loves me but she can’t be with me because I’ve been tearing her apart inside. I drove her right into Ian’s arms. I shake my head at my reflection, “You fucking idiot.”
“Yo, Smoak! Are you in here?” Bobby’s voice echoes through the men's room. He’s probably ready to play more cards. I do admire him for that. No matter how many times we get our asses kick he never wants to quit.
“Yeah, Bobby. I’m here. I’m coming. Relax.” I call back waving a hand in the direction of the door.
“No, Smoak. It’s Brooke.” His tone sounds serious and I can tell already that I’m not going to like what he’s about to say. I feel my heart start to pound like a bass drum in my chest as I turn to face him. My eyes narrow toward his and I can feel my muscles tensing as my body already begins to shake. “Ian took her outside. He looked pretty pissed. I wasn’t really sure what to do. I mean, he’s our Captain and it just looked like they were arguing, but uh, Gabe said I should come tell you.”
Before Bobby even finishes what he is saying I am out of the bathroom and halfway across the bar. I burst through the doors and look around. The parking lot is pitch black when I first come out the door. I don’t see anyone. I check around the side and back of the building but I still don’t see anyone. My breathing is heavy and shallow. I can feel the adrenaline building in my system with every second that passes that I can’t find her.
“Brooke…” I call out cautiously but I don’t get a response. I make my way back toward the front of the building and am about to call out for her again but then I hear a loud, deep groan. It’s a man’s voice. My speed walk turns into a jog when I hear the groan followed moments later by a loud CRACK. I move quickly through the parking lot but stop immediately when I see Brooke lying on the ground holding her face Ian standing over her.
Suddenly a fire ignites inside of me that I never knew existed. I charge at him and as soon as he’s within reach I land my fist across his face. It must have caught him off guard because his arms fly up and he stumbles back into a car. By the time he turns to see what it is my other hand is already connecting with his jaw. He stumbles more until he eventually loses his balance falling to the ground.
In an instant I’m on top of him. I feel nothing but pure rage. I see nothing but his face growing more and more bloody with each blow. I hold on tightly to the collar of his shirt holding him in place and bringing his face up to meet my fists.
I dig my knee into his chest keeping his body on the ground. Not that he tries to get up. Not that he could if he wanted to. I repeatedly haul off on his mouth, his eyes, his nose, his jaw. Punch after punch, I release every ill feeling I have ever harbored for this piece of shit. I continue pounding on his face until I feel two sets of arms wrap underneath mine, pulling me backward away from him.
I can’t think. I can’t move. I want to charge him again. I want to beat him bloody again. For her. For Brooke. For what he did to her. I completely lost control. I wanted to kill him. It takes me a few seconds before I even realize who’s holding onto me. My eyes finally leave Ian and I glance to my left then my right. Andy is on my left still holding tightly onto my arm. His face is pale and he’s staring at Ian.
Bobby is on my right. He’s not holding me back anymore but has a hand resting on my shoulder. He’s looking right at me. Concern etched all over his face but he doesn’t say anything. Then I realize… Brooke! “Where is she? Where’s Brooke?” I ask as I rise to my feet and start looking around frantically. Bobby takes a hold of my arm again.
“Smoak, calm down. Just breath, man. She’s inside. She’s fine. Marcy’s getting her some ice.”
I let out a deep breath that it feels like I’ve been holding in since I first saw her on the ground. I need to see her. I need to be with her. Oh, God I hope she’s not mad at me. Andy looks at me like he wants to tell me I can’t go inside but Bobby shakes him off. “I’ll take him in,” he tells Andy. Andy gives him a disapproving look but steps to the side. I take one last glance over toward Ian. He’s sitting up and Gabe is sitting beside him checking him out. I’m a little disappointed that I didn’t at least knock him the fuck out. But I smirk as it all starts coming back to me. Fucking pussy didn’t even get one punch in.
Bobby and I both go through the front door and I spot Brooke sitting hunched over on a chair in a small room behind the bar. She has a blanket draped over her shoulders and she’s talking to someone sitting across from her behind the door. I can only see her from one side but my body physically relaxes when I lay my eyes on her. She’s alright.
I make my way around the bar and ignore all the people looking at me like they know I shouldn’t be back here. As soon as I make it through the threshold Brooke turns her head and looks up at me slowly. I spot her dark green eyes peering at me through long, thick lashes… and there it is again.
That look she has been giving me that I could never figure out. The one that makes me feel completely vulnerable all over and weak at the knees. And this time I have nothing holding me up. I drop to my knee in front of her and release a shaky breath. She’s heartbroken but this time it’s not because of me.
I take her chin gently in my hand and tilt her head slightly toward me. My eyes scan over the swollen mark just below her right eye that looks like it’s already starting to turn black and blue. I want to take her in my arms and squeeze the pain and hurt away. I reach up to grab her and pull her closer to me but she winces at my touch. I eye her curiously then pull the blanket off of her arms exposing the hand print shaped black and blues that are now banded around her biceps.
I feel tears start to pull at the corners of my eyes and my rage starts to return full force. If I get a hold of him again I’m going to fucking kill him. I shake my head as I stare at her markings. “I’m so sorry, Brooke.” I should have been there for her. I should have protected her. I feel her hands on my face and she pulls my head up to look at her. Her eyes are completely glassed over with tears that are just waiting to fall.
“Don’t you dare apologize to me, Conner. I should be the one apologizing to you.” She looks down at the blood on my hands and her hands fall to mine. She starts rubbing my knuckles with her thumbs as she continues, “I can’t thank you enough for what you did out there. I was so scared. And the only thing I could think was, I wish Conner were here.” She barely got the sentence out and the tears overflowed from her eyes. Being careful of her bruises I wrap my arms around her and hold her as tight as she can bare as she sobs against me.
Eight
Brooke
I’m finally able to catch my breath after my sobbing, ugly cry. I’m tired, I’m humiliated, and I just want to go home. I look to Conner who’s looking back at me intently as if he’s waiting for me to ask
him for something. Anything. I sniffle and wipe tears from my cheeks. “Do you think you could take me home?” I ask. My voice sounds small.
Conner sits up straight and looks around. “Uh…”
“What’s wrong?”
“Well, uh… I mean I beat the piss out of him pretty good. I wouldn’t be surprised if somebody called this in. I might have to stick around and answer some questions. You probably do too,” he answers, looking a little embarrassed as he rubs the back of his neck.
“Nah, you guys are fine.” My eyes flash to the doorway and find Gabe standing there. “I already spoke to the Chief’s deputy and filled him in on what’s going on. I also gave Ian some words of caution around how far he actually wants to take this and the things that could come up if he chooses to report any of this. Nobody called anything else in, so unless either of you want to file something tomorrow you’re both free to go.” He gave us a big smirk and a playful wink then turned out of the room.
“Welp, let's get you home then,” Conner says with a smile, holding out his hands to help me up. I take them without hesitation and he pulls me to my feet.
****
“Do you just want to stay with me tonight?” Conner’s question breaks the silence of the drive home.
“No. Thank you. I really just want to be in my own house.”
“Then I’m staying with you,” he responds without missing a beat. I shoot him a quick smile but don’t say anything. I knew he would offer to stay with me. And tonight I’m actually really glad that he did. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t still terrified that Ian would come to my house in the middle of the night to finish what he’d started. The thought causes a shiver to run down my spine. My movement immediately catches Conner’s eye.
“Are you cold?” he asks, snapping his head back and forth between me and the road as he continues driving.
“No. I’m fine. Just had a chill that’s all.”
There's Heat: A Friends to Lovers Romance Page 7
