by Jyoti Singh
The fights were initially quiet arguments about how Sid needed to move out of his slacker mode and become more assertive. Gauri had been contemptuous of Sid’s obsession with coding and thought he could use his time better by moving up the management ladder. Sid, on the other hand, was happy the way he was. He saw a different picture, where his code actually answered a need people did not know they had. He toiled away, late into the night after work, to create a new paradigm for social interaction in the virtual world. It was a world in which Gauri had no place and soon the arguments became fights.
Sid was not one to give up easily, so he made every effort to salvage what was left of their relationship but it was not enough for Gauri. He still had the e-mail in which she had detailed his failures and told him she had met someone new. Sid had never quite understood why Gauri had not told him in person. It had been a thorn in his side.
‘What would you do if you ran into her?’ asked Tanya.
‘I would be civil and polite, Tanya. I have no bones to pick. She made her choice years ago and I have moved on.’ Sid truly believed he had.
The Gauri he had fallen in love with had been very different from the Gauri who had broken up with him and Sid was cognisant of the fact that it was not a reversible change. It had taken a lot of hard work to get over the pain of rejection and the void Gauri had left in his life. He still carried the scars of her berating not just his dreams but him as a person. Sid was now in a place where he was at peace with what had happened but it had come at the cost of his loss of trust in women in general. He was wary and did not want to be in a position where a woman had that much power over him, his choices or his life, again.
‘So, is there someone else?’ Tanya asked.
‘Not right now and, honestly, I’m not really looking. I have a lot of things on my plate. But who knows, if the right person comes along…’ Sid trailed off. Fate had taught him a valuable lesson today.
Niki had left the table not because she needed to use the ladies room but because she had, as usual, embarrassed herself. First things first, she was still quite shaken by the coincidence of meeting the elevator man again like this. Secondly, Sid got to her, but that was no excuse to call him a sexist pig or to doubt his orientation towards money. She had used ‘capitalism’ as a pejorative and he did have a point… She would not want to work for free, at least not right now.
As she reached the loo, she smacked her forehead, muttering, ‘Stupid, stupid, stupid.’ She washed her hands and took a deep breath while looking at her reflection. Her eyes were bright and glittering and there was more colour in her skin than usual. She thought she had handled herself so well until the last part of the conversation but Sid had ruffled her. He’d been sitting so close and each time he’d reached for his drink she could see the muscles flex in his arm under the short-sleeved shirt. His long legs clad in low-slung jeans were within a hair’s breadth from her knee. She was so aware that a slight change in her position would result in contact and it had, sparking an awareness with which she was not comfortable. He hadn’t shaved and she liked the shadow of the stubble on his very attractive and strong chin. The wide forehead, the aquiline nose and his even teeth when he smiled made her feel all hot and bothered. When he had used her name for the first time, she felt goose pimples rise. ‘Get it together, girl,’ she told herself.
Taking another deep breath, she left the ladies room with the conviction that she would be careful about what she said this time. Sid had the capacity to rile her and it did not have as much to do with what he said but how he made her feel.
She felt Sid’s eyes on her as she walked to the seating. It was a frank appraisal that made her blush. He stood up as she reached them. A gentleman. Tanya and Sid had been recounting their days at graduate school in her absence and, once she settled back into the wing chair, they continued. The flow of drinks and snacks ensured the conversation became free and light.
‘How come you don’t have any stories to share?’ Sid asked Niki.
‘I do but you had to be there. Moreover, you know what it’s like when you are studying engineering – it’s all about getting from one semester to the next. Most of my batch was so obsessed with code and gaming that they forgot they were human,’ she said.
‘That’s not quite true. We had a lot of fun during our engineering and did some really stupid things to boot,’ Sid replied.
‘Care to share?’ asked Niki.
‘It’s highly confidential. If I told you I’d have to kill you.’ Sid winked so she knew he was joking. Niki returned the warmth she saw in his eyes with a smile. Something flared in Sid’s eyes in response.
Niki’s mobile rang and she excused herself to take the call. It was the cab service. They could not honour her booking for a pick-up from the Karma Lounge. Niki had a long and aggravating conversation with the agency, then went back to join Tanya and Sid.
‘I’ll need a ride back home, Tanya. My cab service just cancelled,’ she promptly said as she sat down again.
‘No problem. My driver’s here. Only thing, I need to get dropped off first because I have a Skype date with Tushar,’ Tanya said.
‘Allow me,’ Sid volunteered. ‘I would be happy to drop you home.’
‘Great! There you go.’ Tanya looked happily at her sister. Niki could actually see her mentally rubbing her hands in glee.
That was settled. The anticipation of driving back with Sid was both exciting and nerve-racking, making it difficult for Niki to concentrate on the conversation that followed.
Tanya called it an evening by asking for the check. As they walked out, she firmed up the plans for dinner in a couple of days and asked Niki to join them.
The valet brought the car to the foyer. It was the Jaguar minus the driver. ‘I gave Venky the night off,’ Sid said before she could ask.
Tanya hugged Sid and Niki before leaving. Sid then opened the passenger door for Niki, before getting into the driver’s seat of the Jag. Niki took some time to appreciate the leather car seats and the dashboard that resembled an aircraft’s cockpit. There was complete silence in the car until Sid said, ‘It would help to know where I need to go, you know.’
‘Oh! I’m so sorry. Just got a little distracted by all this opulence…’ Niki said as she gave him her address.
As they drove off, Sid spoke. ‘It was really nice to catch up with Tanya and you today. Didn’t feel the lapse of time at all. The way she always speaks of you, I imagined a little girl in pigtails…’
‘And?’
‘I am pleasantly surprised.’ He smiled, watching the road. The traffic was still heavy and they made progress slowly. ‘You weren’t there in any of the wedding pictures she shared.’
‘I was… just behind the camera.’ Niki looked at him as she replied. His profile seemed at ease, with none of the firmness she had seen in the elevator. Despite the enclosed space, the seats created enough distance so as not to be too close for comfort. The sheer luxury and the smoothness of the drive gave an artificial sense of privacy, which made Niki shift in her seat.
‘Are you always this fidgety?’ Sid asked.
‘Not really… I’m just so used to being on my bike in the midst of the traffic, with the honking and fumes. I’m not accustomed to this level of luxury. It just feels strange,’ she replied.
He chuckled. ‘It’s one of the easiest things to get used to and, like your bike is for you, it is my guilty pleasure.’
‘You should feel guilty. This thing costs as much as a house!’ Niki regretted saying it as soon as the words escaped.
‘What do you have against my money, Niki? I earned it fair and square and I share it with others. Why should I not enjoy some of the privileges it allows me?’ The tone of his voice had changed, the warmth ebbing.
‘Nothing and I’m sorry; of course you have every right,’ Niki said, biting her tongue.
‘Spit it out, Niki. I know you have something to say,’ Sid persisted.
‘All right, I do. How much time do
you really spend in your car? And what does it do? Take you from A to B. You could do the same in a car that cost a fraction of this one. It just seems inappropriate in our context to have these huge luxurious monstrosities, especially when parking and traffic are such big issues.’ Niki couldn’t help herself.
Sid’s jaw tightened and then he laughed, surprising Niki. ‘I do see your point but I am going to ask you one question… If money was no object, which car would you buy?’
‘A Bentley Ghost,’ Niki replied almost instantaneously.
‘Gotcha! You have double standards, my dear. You see, money is no object for me and I always wanted this car. Like I said, I am within my rights to enjoy the privileges money allows me.’ The good humour had returned but with an underlying steel.
‘If that is the case, explain your watch. It’s old and looks like a hand-me-down. Why haven’t you upgraded that too?’ Niki asked.
‘It was my grandfather’s. He gave it to me when I became an engineer. He passed away soon after. I wear it as his blessing. There are some things money cannot buy, Niki,’ Sid replied.
Niki was confused by the contradiction between material and non-material, the western sensibility and the Indian values… She fell silent as she wondered if he would ever make sense to her.
‘Cat got your tongue?’ Sid asked.
‘No, the alcohol. Guess it’s finally hitting my system,’ she prevaricated as she realised they were turning into her complex of flats.
Sid stopped the car at the foyer and switched off the engine. ‘I’ll walk you to the elevator,’ he offered.
‘There’s no need. I really appreciate the ride. Thank you,’ she said as she opened the door.
‘Give me your mobile,’ Sid ordered.
Surprised, Niki immediately asked, ‘Why?’
‘I want to punch in my number, silly,’ he said, smiling.
Niki obliged and heard his phone ring, letting her know he had her number. She quickly thanked him again and walked into the lobby. She didn’t hear the engine start until after she had entered the elevator and the doors began to close.
Niki let herself into her flat. She looked out at the Gurgaon skyline with its twinkling lights from her window and wondered at the strange day she had had. Tanya would need a complete debrief tomorrow. Till then, she could sleep and dream. She had a nasty suspicion that a tall, handsome man would definitely feature in some of them and, surprisingly, she welcomed the thought. Of all the candidates Tanya had found for Niki, Sid was the only one to get under her skin.
She kicked off her sandals and changed out of her dress into her pyjamas. She threw herself on her bed and recapped the day in her mind, wincing at how she had let her words run away with her and the elevator incident. Her mobile beeped to say a message had come in.
It was from Sid and it said: Goodnight!
She messaged back—Goodnight!—and smiled as she went to sleep.
Chapter Three
‘So, what did you think of Sid?’ Tanya called first thing in the morning.
‘I am not quite awake yet. Can I call you back after I’ve had a cup of tea?’ Niki said sleepily.
Despite the amount of alcohol she had consumed, she did not have a hangover but her sleep had not been restful. Just as she had expected, Sid had invaded her dreams and some of them were not exactly kosher. She blushed at her naughty thoughts.
She got out of bed, knowing that if she didn’t call Tanya back in another ten minutes she would be standing at her door. That would be too much to handle in her current state of dishabille.
Her flat had two bedrooms, one of which she used as a home office, a spacious hall, which held her seating and dining areas, and an open kitchen. The sun poured in through the windows that lined the entire flat. The décor was a warm mix and match of some family heirlooms with modern furniture. This was her home and Niki believed it reflected her.
She made a cup of tea in the kitchen, then sat on her father’s favoured armchair and called Tanya.
‘Okay, spill all,’ she said, bypassing any greeting.
‘What do you want me to say? I liked him. He’s interesting and very different from the others you have tried to set me up with…’ Niki was non-committal.
‘Anything happen in the car when he dropped you home?’ Tanya didn’t hold back.
‘No… he did give me his number and texted me goodnight.’ She gave the bare bones, just enough information for Tanya to back off.
‘Hope you didn’t get onto your high horse again. Really, what was that about?’ It was a rhetorical question and Niki could imagine Tanya shaking her head in disapproval.
‘Come on, Tanya. He’s a big boy and if he can’t handle a woman with strong opinions, so be it.’ Niki was defensive. The emotional distance returned. She had promised her parents she could look after herself and no one, not even Tanya, could make her believe otherwise. Sid might have got under her skin and invaded her dreams but he was still a long way from becoming the central pillar of her life. If he found her opinions difficult to deal with, he was not the man for her.
‘I worry about you, you know. You have to make it easier for people to like you, Niki.’ Tanya went into her maternal mode. ‘Such hard views can put men off.’
‘Let it go, Tanya.’ Niki hated this lecture; she’d heard it a million times before. Each time it was about what was wrong with her that needed fixing, never about the candidate. The challenge for Niki was to make herself vulnerable enough to actually like someone. None of Tanya’s selections had connected with her at that level, so Niki found it easy to be logical and practical, not emotional. There was no denying that part of Niki’s resistance to being happy was rooted in the fact that she did not feel she deserved it, especially since she had been instrumental in the loss of two of the most important people in her life. Tanya did not really understand this part of Niki, although she tried.
‘I really don’t want to start my day like this. What you should be doing instead is ferreting information from Sid whether he liked me!’
‘I have something to admit,’ Tanya said sheepishly. ‘He didn’t know it was a set-up. As he understands, we were just catching up and you joined us.’
‘That’s good, isn’t it? Then there is no chance of my strong opinions putting him off.’ Niki was a little disappointed.
‘But wasn’t it a great coincidence that you had already met? I just knew that you both would hit it off… In a lot of ways you are very alike and in others you are perfect foils for each other,’ Tanya said, ignoring Niki’s sarcasm. ‘This could actually work. He does tend to be a little reclusive, though. Now, remember, dinner at our place tomorrow. Come early and help me get organised.’
There would be no opportunity to help her get organised but Niki was in no mood to argue. ‘I’ll come straight from work and change at your place,’ she said.
They said their goodbyes and disconnected.
Niki would have gladly slept in but she had to be at work in another hour. She picked out her clothes, as always mindful of the fact that she rode a motorcycle, and pulled out a pair of skinny black jeans, teamed them with an ivory silk camisole and a sand-coloured linen jacket and black wedge pumps. Then jumped into the shower.
Purvi was waiting in her chair when she arrived at the office. The elevator had behaved, thankfully.
‘Purvi needs to know.’ Third person again. Purvi was a sweet girl from a small town in Maharashtra, a westerly state of the country. She reported to Niki but treated her like her friend because Niki had taken her under her wing and helped her adjust to big city life and work. She was curious about Niki’s life because it gave her a window into what could be and she wanted to learn.
‘It was very nice. The Karma Lounge delivers on its promise,’ Niki averred.
‘No, who did you meet? Your sister found someone new for you…’ By virtue of sitting right next to her, Purvi could listen in on most of her conversations and she unabashedly took it as permission to ask very personal q
uestions. Niki was at fault too. On many occasions, in sheer frustration with her sister, she had leaned over and vented to Purvi.
‘Remember, we spoke about boundaries, Purvi? But yes, he was an old friend of hers and he was nice,’ she said, giving just the basic information.
‘Is he good-looking? Will you see him again?’ Purvi asked.
Niki hesitated, then replied, ‘Yes, and it looks like we will meet again at my sister’s dinner tomorrow.’ It was always easier to be honest with Purvi because she remembered everything Niki said and would call her on any discrepancy.
‘Is Samar in yet?’ she asked. ‘I have a few things I need to clear with him.’
Purvi understood that this was the end of the conversation. ‘He’s coming in around eleven a.m. Something about taking his son for his immunisation.’
Purvi returned to her desk, while Niki pulled out the documents she needed and got down to work. Her mind wandered to Sid and what he had said about Samar. Samar was very good-looking but he was a nice guy too. When Niki had joined, she had the most precious schoolgirl crush on him and almost misunderstood his warmth for something else, until he started speaking about his wife and son during a conversation one day. Niki had been gutted for a few days, but had quickly got over it.
So, Sid did have a point about how Samar’s looks and demeanour affected the workplace. It was always a pleasure to walk into the office and see him. Over the course of the two years that she had worked with him, Niki had grown both as a person and as a professional. She counted him as a mentor and a friend.
Niki didn’t realise the passage of time. A conference call, paperwork and team meeting later, she decided to check in with Samar. She gathered her laptop and papers in her arms and walked to his office, smiling at her colleagues on the way.
She knocked on his door and marched in with familiar ease. ‘Good morning, Samar. I need to discuss the Wave project with you,’ she said.
