by S. J. West
Clark stares disbelievingly at Levi’s dead body on the snow beside him and then looks up at Lucifer in trepidation.
“Boo,” he says to him.
Clark immediately phases away.
Lucas quickly moves away from Levi and Lucifer to kneel down beside Malcolm, yanking on his shoulders in a desperate attempt to wake him up. Desmond phases to Malcolm and rolls him over onto his back to check his pupils. Daniel and Brutus phase over to Millie while Jered phases us over to Malcolm and Lucas.
“He’s just been drugged,” Desmond tells us. “I’m sure Levi knew he wouldn’t be able to control Malcolm any other way, especially if his plan was to kill Lucas in front of you.”
I sit down on the snow and bring Lucas into my arms. He buries his head against my shoulder and begins to cry.
“Are you ok?” I ask him. “Did he do anything to you? Are you hurt anywhere?”
Lucas shakes his little head.
“I want to go home, Anna,” he sobs. “Can we please just go home?”
“If you want to leave, I would do it before Levi wakes up,” Lucifer advises me.
I look up at Lucifer. He’s watching me closely but his expression is indecipherable.
“Why did you help us?”
“Still so naïve, Anna,” Lucifer says with a shake of his head. “Who said I did this for you?”
“Then who did you do it for?”
“Myself, of course,” Lucifer says. “I couldn’t let Levi free his brothers. If I do it, their allegiance stays with me and I have plans for them.”
“What plans?” I ask.
Lucifer grins. “You’ll know soon enough.”
He bends down and grabs a handful of Levi’s hair before standing back up with Levi firmly in his grasp.
“Feel free to phase anywhere you want. It’ll take Levi some time to wake up.”
“Wake up?” I ask, totally confused. “I thought you just killed him.”
“No, I did not kill him. I need him for my plans too, even if he is a pain in my ass. Is that close to the same thing as being a boil?”
Lucifer smiles down at me like he expects me to laugh at his little play on my joke. I have too many things on my mind to find it amusing.
“Then he’s still alive?” I ask.
“In a manner of speaking,” Lucifer answers. “I’m sure your friends can tell you more later. I would suggest you all leave from here. I’ll take care of Levi for now so he doesn't bother you. Until we meet again, Anna.”
Lucifer phases, and this time when I see the black void his phase trail leads to, I know he’s taken Levi directly to Hell.
I tighten my hold on Lucas.
“Where should we go?” I ask, not really talking to anyone in particular.
“Let’s go back to New Orleans,” Jered says. “It looks like Lucifer has Levi under control. I don’t think he’ll be bothering us anytime soon, and we can regroup.”
I nod and place my hand on Malcolm’s arm. Lucas is still clutching me to him. I hug him tightly and phase us all to Malcolm's bed in his New Orleans home. I look over at Malcolm and worry over how still he is. I feel an urgent need to do a more thorough inspection of him.
“Lucas,” I say gently. “I think we should check your father to make sure he’s ok.”
Lucas lifts his tear stained face from my chest and looks over at his dad. He sniffs and nods his head in agreement. We both get off the bed and walk over to the side closest to Malcolm. He’s lying on his back, so I gently roll him over onto his left side to check it. To my relief, most of the damage done by Levi’s whip has healed itself. There’s still some bruising which looks bad, but I’m sure it will fade in record time.
I roll Malcolm back and study his face. I want to kiss him on the lips and have it act like it does in the fairytales where the one sleeping is instantly awoken by true love's kiss, but I know if I pressed my lips against his it would most likely have the completely opposite effect.
“Will he be ok, Anna?” Lucas asks me, taking hold of my hand closest to him, needing my reassurance that his father will be all right.
“He’ll be fine, Lucas. I think he just needs some rest.”
I tear my eyes away from Malcolm’s face and look down at Lucas.
“Lucas,” I say. I wait until he looks up at me before I continue. “Are you sure Levi didn't do anything to hurt you while you were in Cirrus?”
Lucas shakes his head slowly. This slight hesitation is a hint to me that he isn't telling me the entire truth.
“You need to tell me if he hurt you,” I say.
“He didn’t hurt me, Anna. He just killed Vala.”
Lucas’ little shoulders shake as he begins to cry again.
I bend down in front of him and take him into my arms. He rests his head on my shoulder and cries his little heart out.
“It’s ok,” I tell him, feeling my own pain over Vala’s loss unite with his. “There was nothing you could have done to save her.”
“I yelled at him to stop, but he wouldn’t,” Lucas sobs. “I really did try to be brave, Anna.”
“Oh sweetie, I know you did. I never had any doubt that you didn’t try to stop him. He’s just an evil man, Lucas. Bad people do whatever they want no matter who it hurts.”
“He was going to do the same thing to me that he did to Vala, wasn’t he?”
“He was going to try,” I admit, seeing no reason to lie. Lucas is old enough to know what almost happened. And he's smarter than most six year olds. So, lying to him seemed pointless.
“Who was the man who saved me?”
This question was far harder to answer. How much of my connection to Lucifer should Lucas know? How much about Lucifer himself should I warn him about?
“His name is Lucifer,” I tell Lucas, finding it hard to expound much beyond this simple fact.
There’s a knock on the bedroom door which saves me from having to come up with more of an explanation.
“Come in,” I say.
The door opens and Millie, Jered, and Desmond walk into the room. I stand back up just as Millie rushes over to me for a tight hug.
“Oh, my sweet, we were worried sick about you.” Millie pulls back. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t able to save Vala. That devil had her in his hands before either of us could react.”
“We’ve taken Vala to someone who might be able to save her,” Jered says, even though I wish he had kept that little bit of information to himself for the time being. I didn’t want to get Lucas’ hopes up over something that was far from a certainty.
“Do you think this person will really be able to help her?” Lucas asks, his voice filled with newfound optimism.
Jered looks down at Lucas, and I can see he realizes the mistake he just made saying what he did in front of him.
“I think he will try very hard to fix her,” Jered says. “But there’s no guarantee that she can be.”
“When will we know?” Lucas asks.
“Well, I’m not completely sure. I suppose I could go see if he knows anything yet though. Would you like to come with me?”
Lucas looks up at me like he’s asking for my permission first.
“You can go with Jered,” I tell him.
Lucas lets go of my hand and walks over to Jered.
“We’ll be right back,” Jered says to me. “Hopefully with good news.”
I nod, not voicing my worry that Vala was simply too far gone by the time we were able to get her to Travis.
After Jered and Lucas phase, Desmond walks over to Malcolm and does a brief examination.
“Is there anything we can do for him?” I ask Desmond.
“No,” he replies after looking into Malcolm’s eyes again. “He’s merely in a deep sleep. I’m not sure what medication they gave him, but I would wager it shouldn’t last more than another hour or two, perhaps less.”
“Where are Brutus and Daniel?” I ask.
“Down in the kitchen with Giles preparing something to eat,” Millie t
ells me. “Would you mind very much if I went to help them? I haven’t seen Giles since he was a little boy. We have a lot of catching up to do.”
“No, go ahead. You should both get something to eat. I’m going to stay up here with Malcolm until he wakes up.”
“Like I said, it could be a couple of hours,” Desmond warns.
“I understand, but I’m not leaving him.”
Desmond grins at me with understanding. “Ok. Come get me if you need me.”
After Millie and Desmond leave the room, I pull off Malcolm’s boots and tuck him under the covers. I take off my baldric and lay my sword against the wall on my side of the bed. I quickly slip my jacket off and toss it onto a nearby chair. Then, I crawl underneath the comforter with Malcolm. I lay my left hand against his chest and feel the steady tempo of his heartbeat. Its rhythm brings me comfort and reassures me that he’s still alive. As I lie down next to him, I can’t help but stare at his perfect profile. Even after all he’s been through, he still looks as devilishly handsome as ever. I lift my hand from his chest and run my fingers through his hair, noticing that it’s matted with blood in spots.
I let my hand drift down the left side of his face and marvel at the man I love. I feel tears threaten, but this time it’s not because I’m sad. I’m simply having a hard time believing someone like Malcolm is mine. My life has been a lonely one for the most part. I was only allowed to see certain people and had almost given up hope that I would ever meet a man I could give myself to completely. Then, Malcolm came into my world at the exact moment I needed him to. His touch was the only thing that brought me comfort after killing Amon and absorbing the first seal. As my memories travel back to that moment, I can clearly remember the first time I saw Malcolm's face. It was a moment permanently etched into my memory.
“I will do everything within my power to make our life a happy one,” I whisper to him. “Please, wake up, Malcolm.”
He doesn’t wake up of course, but his continued slumber gives me an idea.
I lay my head on his chest and let the sound of his beating heart lull me to sleep, transporting me to the land of dreams. It’s a place where I hope to reunite with my soul mate.
When I enter Malcolm’s dream world, I feel out of sorts. It’s almost like the drugs inducing his slumber are affecting me as well. Various memories from Malcolm’s past swirl around me with no obvious coherency. Flashes of people, some I recognize and some I don’t, float in the maelstrom of his thoughts, but no image or scene stays long enough for me to make any sense out of them.
I decide to attempt something to help him, but I have no way of knowing if it will work.
I take control of the dream.
I close my eyes to block out Malcolm’s dream world and focus my thoughts on one single moment in our shared past. It’s the moment Malcolm was in my room waiting for me to phase there. I had just gone to his bedroom in Cirrus the night of the wedding celebration because I felt his pain through the connection of our souls. Afterwards, I tried to phase back to my own bedroom but was unable to. Malcolm instructed me to follow his phase trail to make it easier to learn how to phase on my own.
When I returned to my room, I found him sitting on the side of my bed waiting for me. The look in his eyes then told me that he wanted me as much as I wanted him. I walked over to him, and he pulled me in close to his body, resting his head against my breasts and closing his eyes as if holding me brought him some much needed peace. I focus on that moment hoping to recreate it again within this dreamscape.
Large, warm hands caress the small of my back, and I feel Malcolm’s head come to rest between my breasts.
When I open my eyes, I see that what I attempted to do has worked. Malcolm’s incoherent thoughts have been pushed aside, and I’m now in control of what we see.
I pull away slightly which makes Malcolm lift his head and look up at me.
His eyes are slightly unfocussed from being drugged. When a lazy smile appears on his face, I know he can see me and knows who I am.
“Are you all right?” I ask him, concerned not just for his physical well-being but mental stability as well. I can’t imagine what he went through during Levi’s torture. I’m certain Levi wouldn’t have just tried to break Malcolm physically, but mentally and emotionally as well.
“Better now,” he answers, his voice sounding tired. “Is Lucas safe?”
“Yes, our son is safe.”
Malcolm lets out a deep sigh in relief.
I lean down so my face is only inches away from Malcolm’s.
“What can I do to help you?” I ask. “Just name it and it’s yours.”
“Kiss me, Anna.”
I hesitate but then realize there isn’t any reason to. We’re in a dream, not reality. There’s no way I can poison him in this world.
I gently push on Malcolm’s shoulders until he’s lying on his back. I have to pull the hem of my nightgown up to my thighs before I can climb onto the bed and straddle his waist. I lean over and rest my forearms on either side of Malcolm’s head until our faces are only inches apart. He watches me with a look of amusement on his face.
“I almost feel as though I’m being taken advantage of,” he tells me, the corners of his mouth lifting in a smile. “Please tell me that I am.”
I smile back at him and shake my head.
“No,” I tell him. “I would never take advantage of you.”
Malcolm sighs in disappointment. “And here I thought I was about to get lucky.”
I laugh and lower my lips so they hover just above his.
“You are about to get lucky but with only a kiss.”
“I suppose that will have to do…for now.”
I tentatively touch my lips to his, kissing his upper lip gently before pressing my mouth over his completely. The sensation is pleasant, but I can instantly tell something is missing. Our physical contact feels buffered in some way. I can feel the warm, wetness of his mouth and the play of his tongue against mine, but something vital is absent.
I pull back and look down at Malcolm.
“Why doesn’t it feel real?” I ask.
“Because it isn’t,” he tells me. “We’re still in a dream. Nothing compares to reality.”
I’m the one who sighs in disappointment this time.
“I was hoping…” I begin to say but can’t quite make myself finish.
“That we could be physical with each other here because it’s safe,” Malcolm finishes for me.
I nod my head. “Yes. I’m sure the poison is still in my system, and we have no way of knowing when it will go away.”
“Then kiss me again, Anna. I would rather have a phantom kiss from you than nothing at all.”
I lean down to Malcolm again and continue our kiss because he’s right. Even this minimal physical contact is better than nothing. I decide to try and make the most out of what we can do to one another.
I run my hands across his shoulders and up his muscular arms until our hands meet. We twine our fingers together like neither one of us wants to let the other go. If it’s within my power to control, I plan to make sure we’re never separated again. I can’t stand not being near him and in my heart, I know he feels the same way.
Malcolm swiftly rolls me over onto my back, pulling my arms higher over my head as he straddles my hips. He kisses his way down one side of my neck, and I tilt my head to give him better access to that part of my flesh. His hands slowly slide down the length of my arms until they come to rest on either side of my breasts. His lips kiss a path down to the valley between my breasts as his thumbs begin to circle their peaks.
“Malcolm…” I sigh. “Will you make love to me?”
Malcolm doesn’t answer right away because his mouth is otherwise occupied. He teases one nipple with his tongue through the thin fabric of my nightgown. Apparently, he doesn’t want to make the other breast jealous because he slides his lips over to lavish it with the same adoration.
He kisses his way back up to m
y lips and murmurs against them, “Not here. Not yet.”
“Why?” I beg, feeling as though I’ll crawl out of my own skin from want if Malcolm doesn’t satisfy the burning need I feel to have all of him.
“Because this is just a dream,” he says, lifting his head so he can look me in the eyes like he wants to make sure I understand what he’s about to tell me. “When I make love to you, I want you to feel everything I do to your body. I don’t want to do it here because you would only be feeling a small portion of the sensations. It will be the first time for you, right?”
I nod. “Yes.”
“Your first time making love shouldn’t be in a dream, Anna. I want you to feel my love physically and know in your heart that you are the only woman I will ever want. If you thought seeing me for the first time made the earth quake beneath your feet, then making love with me will make it seem like the planet itself has exploded all around you.”
“You’re not making my wait any easier with talk like that,” I groan in frustration.
Malcolm chuckles and I feel his hips move against mine.
I gasp slightly at the feel of him between my legs as he proves to me that the wait won’t be any easier on him than it is for me.
“Maybe we should stop,” I say, albeit reluctantly. “Because this is beginning to feel more like torture than pleasure.”
Malcolm kisses the tip of my nose and sits up. He scoots over to rest his back on the headboard, and I go to him, resting my head on his chest while his arms hold me close.
“How are Millie and Vala?” He asks. “Did Levi do anything to them?”
“Millie’s fine. But…”
I find it hard to tell Malcolm about Vala. The uncertainty of her fate is almost more upsetting than if I knew she was dead. A small piece of hope lives in my heart that Travis will find a way to save her.
“But what?” Malcolm gently prods, gliding his left hand up and down my arm in a soothing manner, silently letting me know that I can tell him anything.
“Levi ripped Vala’s head from her body in front of Millie and Lucas.”
