Paige half nodded.
I wanted her to say yes, we did have more opportunities to do that, but she didn’t. That stung a little. I shook it off and smiled at Paige.
“So, we’re okay?” Paige asked.
I got up, and we hugged. “We’re more than okay,” I said. “We’re best friends and always will be.”
That made Paige grin. “I’ve got so much to tell you about break,” she said. “And I want to hear all about yours.”
“I want to hear every detail about yours, and I’ll tell you all about mine, but there’s something I have to do first.”
Paige gave me the you better spill face.
“I’ll tell you all about it the second I get back,” I said. “Promise.”
“You better,” Paige said.
I changed out of my wrinkled shirt and pulled on a cranberry-colored, v-neck, long-sleeve shirt, dark skinny jeans, and black wedges.
“Be back soon,” I said to Paige.
I walked out of the room, pulling my phone out of my pocket.
Meet u in an hr? ~S
I sent the text to Jacob.
My phone vibrated seconds later.
Perf. C u there.
Then I headed to the one place that would make me feel comfortable before my meeting with Jacob.
3
ESP
I WALKED TO THE BLACK AND WHITE STABLE, inhaling the scent of clean hay, horses, and sweet grain. Charm’s stall was exactly where I needed to be to calm down. Plus, not seeing him for a week was unacceptable!
I hurried past rows of box stalls, ducked around horses in crossties, and sidestepped muck carts.
When I got to Charm’s stall, I peered over the door. He was snoozing in the back, one chestnut leg cocked and his head down.
“Hi, gorgeous,” I said, my voice soft so I didn’t startle him.
Immediately, he lifted his head and turned his ears toward the sound of my voice. I unlatched the stall door and stepped into the sawdust.
When Charm and I reached each other I threw my arms around his neck. I hugged him hard, feeling him lean into me as if he was hugging me back. His coat was spotless and it gleamed like copper. Mike—my favorite groom—had taken perfect care of Charm just like I’d known he would.
I released Charm’s neck and stroked his blaze. Kissing his cheek, I squeezed my eyes shut for a second, just happy to be with my horse. Charm looked toward the door and our connectedness, through what I swore was ESP, told me what he was thinking.
“So sorry,” I said. “But we’re not going for a ride right now. I missed you so much that I wanted to see you. You’re also the best listener and I’m about to go do something in a little while that’s kind of scary.”
Charm’s attention left the door, and he looked back at me. I leaned against the stall wall in the back so I could see the door in case anyone approached. The last thing I needed was for someone to overhear my conversation with my horse. Charm turned toward me and nuzzled my ribs, making me laugh.
“Thanks,” I said, stroking his neck before grabbing his black leather halter. “I missed you too.”
Charm blinked, with what I was sure was understanding, and pointed his ears at me—like he was telling me to talk.
“It’s a looong story,” I said. “But over break, Heather hacked into my e-mail account and wrote to Jacob as if she were me.”
Charm put back an ear—he still had mixed feelings about Heather.
“At first, I freaked out. I thought I was going to pour a Diet Coke on her or something. I stayed up all night thinking about what she’d done. But even though what she did was wrong—she did what I didn’t have the guts to do—go after what I want.”
I swallowed.
“I want to be with Jacob,” I whispered. “I know I said I was swearing off boys. And I am! I think. But I have these feelings for Jacob, and I wish there were some way we could be together. I know we can’t because it would kill Callie even though they’re broken up. I just wish there was some way.”
Charm huffed a warm breath into my hand.
“What should I do?” I asked him. “Do I tell Jacob everything I told you? Or do I lie about it and tell him Heather sent the e-mails and I don’t agree with anything she said?”
Charm looked at me with beautiful brown eyes and I knew the answer to my question.
“I better go,” I said. “I love you so much. You’re my number one guy. See you tomorrow. You’ll definitely get your ride.”
Charm blinked and if he could smile, I knew he would have.
I kissed his black and pink muzzle, then left the stall. I was ready to face Jacob. It was time to talk.
I walked down the sidewalk, taking a right to the courtyard. That part of the campus was empty since everyone was probably unpacking or catching up with friends after break. I passed the stone benches and walked over the cobblestones.
And there he was. Waiting for me.
Jacob turned, his hands shoved deep in the pocket of his crimson hoodie. I almost couldn’t believe that I was staring at him in person after spending most of break imagining him and thinking about what he was doing. His light brown hair and green eyes made it difficult to talk. I semistumbled toward him and stopped, just feet away.
“Hi,” I said, my voice so quiet I barely heard it.
“Hey,” Jacob said, giving me an easy smile. He gestured toward a bench. “Want to sit?”
“Sure.”
We sat at opposite ends of a bench. I turned to face him, and he looked into my eyes.
“There’s no easy way to say this,” I said. “So I just have to.”
Jacob’s lips parted and he looked as if he was trying to prepare himself. As if he was readying himself for me to tell him that I’d thought about it, but wasn’t ready to be his girlfriend.
“It’s not what you think,” I said, immediately wanting to stop the hurt look on his face. “But it is a little complicated.”
Jacob looked at me, waiting.
I paused. “I didn’t write any of the e-mails. Heather hacked into my e-mail account and told you my phone was broken until the weekend. She was the one writing you.”
Jacob’s head dropped. “Oh my God,” he said. “Heather was e-mailing me? I thought it was you the whole time! I had no idea. I feel like such an idiot.”
“Wait, please don’t,” I said. “I was furious when I found out what she’d done. I mean, we’ve sort of become friends and then when I found out … I wanted to break her laptop!”
Jacob’s face was pink with embarrassment. “Every e-mail was from Heather. Every. One.” He sighed.
“You don’t understand,” I said. I had to say it now or I never would. “Heather … told you everything I couldn’t.”
Jacob looked at me—his green eyes flickering back and forth over my face. “What do you mean?”
“Every e-mail she sent was something I wanted to say to you, but was afraid. I was scared of the drama and what would happen if we started dating. But there’s not one thing in those e-mails that I don’t feel or mean.”
The tinge of pink faded from Jacob’s face. He looked at me—his head tilted. “Everything? Even about you wanting to talk about our options about … being together?”
“Yes.” My voice was a whisper.
Jacob seemed to relax and tense at the same time. He drew a leg under him and looked at me, his gaze intense.
“Before you say anything else, I need to tell you something,” he said. “If there’s one thing I regret about the entire situation between Callie, you, and me, it’s that I let you take the blame for what I did at your party. If I’d done the right thing, I would have told Callie the truth.” Jacob dropped his head. “I said nothing and let you lose your best friend. I don’t know if I’ll ever stop feeling guilty about that.”
“You only did it because I asked you to,” I said. “I saw your face that night—you wanted to stand up and tell the truth. But you respected what I wanted enough not to say anything.�
��
Jacob sighed. “I hated every second of you standing there and lying for me.”
Instinctively, I scooted closer to him on the bench. “I couldn’t let her or anyone else think awful things about you. I care about you, Jacob, and it was easier for me to have everyone hate me than to have them be mad at you.”
Jacob’s eyes stayed on mine. “Do you know how amazing you are?”
I blushed. “Yeah, so amazing that I’m here and wanting to talk about …” I let my sentence trail off.
Jacob didn’t press me to finish my sentence—he just waited.
“I want to talk about the possibility of us trying again. And after all I put you through—after I kept saying no, I would understand if you didn’t want to.”
Jacob reached over and slipped his hand into mine. “You have no idea how long I’ve been hoping you’d say that.”
I smiled—and felt the same way I had when I’d first looked at him—those clichéd butterflies, the sweaty palms, and a heartbeat I couldn’t calm.
“We never had a chance,” he said. “Too many things went wrong so early.”
“I know. But I don’t know how to do this! I want this—I really do. I just don’t know how I’d handle Callie and everyone looking at us and hating us. This sounds so selfish, but I want to work out things with us and have a drama-free semester.”
Jacob placed his hand on top of mine. “We’re going to figure it out and I promise you’ll have a drama-free semester.”
“How?”
He looked down, then back at me. “We’ll talk more this week. I know we can do this. And to start things right, on Friday, after the stress of the first week is over, I’m telling Callie the truth. She has to know what happened at your birthday party.”
“Jacob, no. No, no, no,” I said, my voice rising. “You can’t tell her the truth—I don’t want you to. We’ll come up with another way—something—to handle this.”
He shook his head. “I have to, Sasha. I’ve been making this huge mistake the whole time, and I’ve got to make things right. You’ll have a chance at getting your best friend back.”
He got up, his eyes never leaving me. “I want to prove to you that I care about you as much as I’ve been saying I do. And this is the best way to do that—I’m going to show you.”
And with that, he gave me a soft smile. It left me staring after him as he left the courtyard.
4
ONE OF THOSE GIRLS
I REACHED THE STABLE WELL BEFORE MONDAY morning’s riding team meeting. We had a meeting and lesson this morning to kick off our week of preparation for the schooling show on Sunday. Mr. Conner, my riding instructor, had e-mailed everyone last night to let us know to tack up our horses and meet him in the indoor arena.
All morning, Paige and I had chatted sporadically as we’d gotten dressed. She didn’t have to leave as early as I did, so she’d stayed behind in our room. Things weren’t bad between us, but they weren’t … right yet either. Maybe it was going to take time after our blowup at the Homecoming dance for things to be okay between us. But I wasn’t worried about my friendship with Paige. We’d bonded since the first night I’d been at Canterwood. I knew we’d get our full friendship back.
I thought back to our talk last night about break. I’d told her everything about how Heather had e-mailed Jacob as me. Paige had been furious. She’d asked how I’d made it through the ride back to school with Heather. I’d told her that I understood why Heather had e-mailed Jacob, even though I hated her methods. When the conversation had ended, I could tell Paige wanted to ask me the big question—if I wanted to get back with Jacob now that I wasn’t with Eric. But she hadn’t and I was relieved since I wasn’t sure if I would have been ready to talk about it yet.
I walked down the stable aisle, my boot heels thudding on the concrete as I went to the tack room. Rows of gleaming saddles straddled racks and bridles hung from golden hooks.
I grabbed Charm’s black saddle, bridle, and saddle pad, carefully balancing everything as I walked to his stall. Charm was probably still sleeping—he liked to snooze as late as he could.
I put his tack down on the trunk outside his stall and called to him, looking inside the box stall. “Charm?” Just like I’d predicted—he was sleeping in the back corner with his head down. He lifted his head, looking up at me and blinking.
“Time to wake up, sleepy,” I said. “We’ll get you all nice and shiny and go to our lesson.”
Charm’s eyes looked a little less glazed over at the mention of grooming. He loved any attention and being brushed was one of his favorite things.
I held his halter, leading him out of his stall and into the aisle. The pair of crossties in front of his stall was empty, and I clipped the ties to the side of his halter. He lifted his head, watching the activity around him. Other riders started to arrive—I saw Heather had crosstied Aristocrat a few stalls ahead of us.
Heather leaned down to rifle through Aristocrat’s tack trunk. She stood, saw me, and waved.
“Hey,” I mouthed, waving back.
We both got to work—there was never time to talk before morning lessons. I grabbed the dandy brush from Charm’s tack box and ran it over his withers, back, and legs. Dust whisked off his hindquarters and flew into the air.
“How do you get so dirty overnight?” I teased. “Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping?”
Charm huffed, turning his head to look at me with a look as if he wanted to roll his eyes.
I patted his shoulder. “Kidding, kidding,” I said.
I took the softer body brush and took my time going over his neck, chest, and barrel. The brush made his coat shine.
After I picked his hooves I combed his mane and tail and cleaned his nostrils and eyes with a wipe. Then it was time to tack him up.
He was awake now and all about getting to our lesson. He’d been away from the arena for a week, so he was probably ready to stretch his legs. Charm didn’t move as I smoothed the saddle pad onto his back, placed the English saddle on top, and tightened the girth.
As I tightened it I shook my head at the memory of our early days together. My parents had bought Charm for me when he was five and I was a fairly new rider. Supersmart Charm had taken advantage of me whenever he could. One of his first tricks after I’d taken him home was blowing out his stomach when I was tightening his girth. Then, he’d breathed normally when I put my foot in the stirrup to mount. The saddle had slipped sideways, and I’d ended up on the ground.
Not cool.
But he hadn’t done that in years.
I finished tightening his girth and picked up his bridle, slinging it over my shoulder. It took me seconds to unclip the crossties. I put the reins over Charm’s head and left them looped around his neck. I placed the bit on my palm—holding the crown piece of the bridle. Charm took the bit without hesitation. The crown piece settled over his bridle path.
“Time for a trim soon,” I said. Charm would need to be clipped and bathed before the schooling show on Sunday.
I took my helmet out of the trunk and snapped it on. I looked down at my fawn-colored breeches and royal purple shirt, checking for any bits of hay or dirt from grooming Charm. It was my first lesson in a week; I wanted to look ready.
“Let’s go,” I said to Charm, patting his neck.
Ahead of us Heather had already led Aristocrat away. Charm kept his head by my shoulder as we walked down the middle of the mostly empty aisle. The only riders here who had a lesson with Mr. Conner right now were Heather and I, since we were the only two middle school students at Canterwood on the Youth Equestrian National Team. The YENT allowed Mr. Conner to teach our lessons, but he had to report often to Mr. Nicholson, the head scout for the YENT. It was a team that Callie, Julia, and Alison all wanted to make—a decision that would be made at the next team tryout.
I stopped in midstep thinking about Julia and Alison. They’d been kicked off the advanced riding team and forced to miss YENT tryouts because of Jasmin
e. The former Canterwood student had framed them for cheating. With my help, the girls had proven their innocence and were prepping for the next chance at the YENT.
And Callie … I closed my eyes, thinking about my former best friend. She’d tried out for the YENT and hadn’t made it. More than anything, I wanted her to make the team this time—it was her dream.
Stop thinking about that now, I told myself. You’ve got to focus and show Mr. Conner that you worked hard over break.
I started forward again, and Charm followed me into the arena. We stopped beside Heather and Aristocrat. The darker chestnut Thoroughbred laid back his ears a fraction as Charm approached. The two horses had never gotten along and were in constant competition with each other—just like Heather and I had been.
“Back to lessons at this evil hour,” Heather said with a wry smile.
“No kidding. But I did miss it. Just not the getting up early part.”
“Me too.”
Heather looked at me and the look on her face told me what she was going to ask.
“How’d things with Jacob go?” Heather asked.
My blush must have given her my answer.
Heather grinned. “Sooo … you two are getting back together? I mean, I’m just assuming from your red face and grin that you’re barely able to hide.”
I shoved her arm. “Stop! We had a great chat, and we’re going to keep talking this week. We both decided we want to try.”
Heather’s eyes flickered over my face. “But what?”
Thinking about this part made my stomach hurt. “He’s going to tell Callie the truth on Friday,” I said. “He said he made a mistake this entire time by letting me take the blame and he wants to prove to me that he cares enough by talking to Callie.”
Heather nodded. “He’s giving you a chance to get your friend back. You have to let him go with his gut. If Jacob wants to do that for you, then let him. It’s obviously still weighing on him.”
“I know it is. But—”
I stopped midsentence when Mr. Conner walked through the entrance with a girl I’d never seen before. Her long black hair was in a side braid and her bangs came down just over her eyebrows. She led a tall gray gelding that looked to be part Andalusian with a thick mane and wavy tail. She smiled at us, her brown almond-shaped eyes warm.
Elite Ambition Page 2
