Lawrence laughed at himself. Lately, no matter if they were surprised or laughing at him, someone was there who would comfort him and help him see realities that he hadn’t noticed before.. they were his motivation to carry on.
“You.”
“Hmm?”
Holo was silent for a moment before raising her head to speak.
“I am very angry at what you just said, for two reasons.”
“..really?”
“And that look on your face makes three.”
“Well, you eat five times what a normal person eats, so it makes sense you would get twice as angry.”
After he took his shot, she elbowed him before sitting up straight.
“Firstly, what you said also implies that I, your partner, am also worthless.”
Lawrence could only remain silent at this.
“Secondly, you allowed yourself to be depressed over something this stupid. I can only assume it is because you are such a young pup.”
“I must be.”
“And finally..”
She knelt on the bed, placed her hands on her hips, and looked down on him from above. It showed her unhappiness, but it was her face that Lawrence found most disconcerting. He soon realized that feeling went both ways.
“You are a coward over something so silly, showing such dependence.. so why would you even show such a face?”
“Such a.. face?”
Lawrence couldn’t help but repeat her, but she froze for a moment before nodding.
“You spoke with such depression..”
She then looked away.
“..yet your face looked like you still wanted to carry that weight alone.”
Lawrence finally understood why she wasn’t laughing. But he was too late. Her face was red, possibly from the wine, as she raised her ears and gnashed her teeth. But he still replied calmly.
“But if my face showed the opposite, wouldn’t you scold me?”
That didn’t seem to satisfy her, and she sat there whispering to herself for a while. Then she nodded, bent her waist, swished her tail, and sighed.
“Of course I would. But when you follow me despite being scolded and played for a fool, I feel so very happy.”
“I.. don’t want to be so pathetic.”
“Fool.”
Lawrence managed to find just the right time to move his arm so her light body fell into his arms. He understood her anger, and watched her as she continued to bare her teeth while in his arms.
“Should I say I’m sorry?”
“That should be an instinct by now, given how often you are wrong.”
“..”
She was his partner, and he was hers. Neither belonged to the other, they were just there to support each other. That was the way it should be.
Even if he made her angry, that anger wasn’t her only reaction. It felt strange to him, but he needed to be brave enough to show his weak sides to her. He did want to tell her that he was nothing without her support, but..
“Well now, isn’t this strange?”
“Hmm?”
“Somehow I became the one cheering you up.”
She flicked her ears, brushing across his cheek and making it itch. She raised her head and showed a wily smile that came from the bottom of her heart.
“It is my special privilege.”
“Oh jeez.. well, I like it this way too.”
“Oh ho..”
She chuckled, leaning into him more closely.
“Hey, you aren’t planning to use Cole to toy with me again, are-”
But he swallowed the rest of his words.
“Humans are strong.. strong enough to never look back on the past.. but I have had enough.”
She was in tears, yet still managed to speak clearly. She was too wise.. she even knew when to show her weak sides to him. Now wasn’t the right time, he thought, but to show his appreciation he still stroked her head gently.
“I’m a coward.. you’re well aware of that, aren’t you? I always look on the past with fear.. so you have no reason to worry about this.”
After he spoke, she nestled her face into his chest and rolled her head as though drying her tears.
“I do not want to be this pathetic either.”
She was so capricious.. how could he possibly answer that? He simply shot her a wry smile and spoke softly into her ear.
“I’ll talk to you before I make any decisions, alright?”
“..you always give me offerings, but never stay to hear my advice.. I cannot stand it.”
Was she trying to explain something? Indeed, Lawrence’s heart always became an offering when he saw her in this condition.
“Then my kindness is simply an offering?”
“It is a necessary ingredient for a prayer.”
Lawrence smiled as Holo flicked her ears.
“A prayer for what?”
She sat up tall and answered curtly.
“The return of Cole.”
“What the..”
He never wanted to admit it, but he truly couldn’t win against her. She closed her eyes and smiled. For her to open her heart to him this way was significant, and Lawrence now realized why.
Indeed, Lawrence hated being ignored and excluded in business decisions. And as the god of harvest of a village, Holo had grown to hate it as well.
She had also been excluded from the talks about her homeland and the Moon-Hunting Bear.. it must have been terribly lonely, so of course she would have had enough of it.
Lawrence would have eventually figured this out, but it would have taken a while. And that’s exactly how Holo would answer if she was asked why she decided to reveal her feelings this way.
“It is always difficult to find the right moment to spring my traps. But that only makes it all the more worthwhile.”
She beamed her cunning smile at him while her ears spun around towards the hallway as if she had detected new prey. Lawrence could appreciate her methods; such a wise wolf would never use the same trap twice, she simply wasn’t that careless.
“I won’t fall into every trap, you know.”
She silently flashed him a toothy grin, then stood up and made her way back to the window sill. His mouth still had a sweet aftertaste from the honey, but it was replaced with bitterness as she left him.
“Sorry to keep you waiting so long.”
Without fail, Cole had returned.
“Too slow! I am out of patience.. where is the wine?”
“Uh.. right here. Oh, I got some for Mr. Lawrence too!”
“What is the point in that? It is just wasted effort.”
Listening to their exchange made Lawrence laugh, but it was mostly at Holo’s incredible ability to change her mood and expression. She could trap anyone easily with that skill.. it was truly terrifying. It made him decide to bite into some spicy jerky.
“So, what useful information did you gather?”
Holo didn’t even bother thanking Cole, so Lawrence took a moment to do so instead of answering. The boy’s efforts demanded appreciation. He had slung his ragged jacket like a bag over his shoulders to haul quite a lot of food.. Holo had clearly been demanding, and yet he managed to complete her task beautifully.
For her to not thank him meant that she was either unwilling to do so, or had even expected him to fail. If this boy became an merchant’s apprentice, he would surely be one the other apprentice’s couldn’t compete with.
“Did you not hear me!?”
Lawrence was watching Cole skillfully set the food on the table, but Holo’s unpleasant shout finally forced an answer from him.
“Yes, I heard you.”
“..well?”
“It’s a matter well worth investigating. To build this market, the landowners borrowed money but couldn’t return it. Moreover, D’Jean Company, who turned out to not be as powerful or evil as we expected, is just being used.”
Holo was eating some roasted clams, so Cole continued the conversation.
> “..their profits are being taken from them?”
“Exactly. D’Jean’s once profited from the copper trade of the Roam river, but now their profits are being siphoned away by the rulers of the north. And-”
Holo interrupted him with a loud hiccup after washing down the clam meat with some wine.
“Someone got angry about their plan to make great profits from the Church, right?”
“Indeed. And also..”
Lawrence popped a piece of fish into his mouth. He didn’t know what kind of fish it was, but they hadn’t removed the silvery scales before frying it. It was fresh and tender.. the oil they used to fry it was probably of a high grade. Holo freely spent a whole silver coin on just apples once, and now she was disrespecting another coin by spending it on such luxuries.
“I suspect Reynolds is to blame.”
“Hmm, indeed, he was lying to us.”
Cole looked at Holo’s surprising interjection.
“It’s easy to guess the details. We asked him about the wolf-god’s bones; what would he hide if he didn’t want to disclose everything?”
“He could not hide his tail even if he covered his ears, correct?”
Holo waved her ears and tail as she answered. But Reynolds was a merchant.
“The wise do not show their wisdom.. that’s a saying, right? He might have been hiding horns, not ears.”
“He also made sure to shake your hands before you left.”
Holo was very attentive. Lawrence nodded, and picked out a scale lodged between his teeth.
“He asked me to greet Eve. But I’ve no idea if he’s interested in her money, business, or network of contacts.”
“That fox spent all of her money on fur. And even if he was unaware of her situation, he would know where she would go for money, correct?”
Holo smiled as if the situation was all a joke. It reminded Lawrence of his own attitude when he nearly went bankrupt.
“So he was interested in her business and network. In any case, the actors and stage are set, aren’t they?”
Holo smiled in silent response and looked outside, while Lawrence continued eating. Cole held a cup in both hands and alternated glances between the two of them. He wasn’t a bad kid, in fact he was clever enough to figure out their intention. Given their conversation, he would understand that they wanted him to listen and compare his own ideas with theirs.
“Ah.. question!”
He raised his hand. No matter how strict and odd a teacher was, they would appreciate and spoil such a serious and hardworking student. Cole might even have been lead to his downfall by the jealousy of the other students around him.
“Is Mr. Reynolds still looking for the real bones?”
Holo kept her mouth shut. But it was beyond doubt that Cole had been under the tutelage of a harsh teacher; he wasn’t at all timid.
“If he wanted to hide that he was still looking for the bones, then he should have just sent us away with some sort of excuse.. but he eagerly offered us a meal because of Ms. Eve’s letter? If that’s why, then he must have shaken Mr. Lawrence’s hands because..”
He became lost in thought. He was unaware of Eve’s ability or influence, so he was judging based on his impression of her.. what did he see?
“..he wants help to do the searching?”
He moved from question to question, but they were all connected. Holo sipped her wine while watching Cole. She then smiled and turned to Lawrence.
“What do you think?”
Lawrence waved his hand in agreement. Whether Cole was correct or not, it was logical.
“This also explains why Ms. Eve gave you the letter so willingly.. she probably knew Reynolds wanted help. But he was still being careful.. he didn’t tell us any important details. Maybe he just didn’t trust us? But in any case, he wanted her help, and then suddenly we appeared.. Ms. Eve is as wily as a wolf isn’t she? She must have thought Reynolds’s scheme was ridiculous, but when we showed up she started thinking it might be true.. but it wouldn’t be smart to just ask him directly.. so what would she do? Such useful people were right there in front of her..”
“Stop, stop..”
Holo halted him like an elderly woman, then laughed. Following his logic, Reynolds must have believed Eve was somewhat interested. That would explain why his attitude changed when Cole asked him if he had actually found the bones.
He probably thought it would be unprofessional to ask her himself, so he probably offered them a meal to determine whether Lawrence was her messenger. And he wasn’t, he was effectively being used by Eve. As such, he didn’t have to say anything important. He could just end their conversation with a meal, like skillfully carving up a fattened goat.
“So, what will you do?”
Holo’s question to Lawrence was to-the-point. Her amber eyes seemed redder than usual. D’Jean’s was a disappointingly poor company, but Holo was wrathful when she considered that they were still searching for the bones. She was surely thinking “this time I must take action.. my fangs, claws and mind will resolve this, I will not simply let it go.” As her partner, Lawrence made up his mind.
“I’ve decided.”
He was about to continue, but noticed two more eyes coldly staring at him. Cole remained silent, but he surely felt the same way Holo did.
“We’ll investigate this, even if we end up with nothing.”
This wasn’t just one person’s business trip.. it wasn’t even just a simple traveling contract between two. A decision reached by consensus was always the most satisfying kind.
They weren’t an army, but they were a bit like a noble’s knights. However, people would grow tired of carrying such weights. Holo had carried the weight of an entire village on her shoulders, so she knew this pain well. And Lawrence was never even thanked.
Thinking in these terms, it dawned on him that the only thing he could really do for Holo was cheer for her when she cried or felt depressed. He stopped smiling, took a deep breath, and assumed the role of a military commander.
“Now, I shall announce each of our responsibilities.”
They listened to Lawrence, Cole taking it seriously and Holo pretending to.
Chapter 3
After Lawrence settled the extra fees Holo had racked up on wine, he left the inn and discovered her and Cole trying to step on each others’ feet. Cole stopped as soon as he saw Lawrence, giving Holo the chance to land a step.
“I win.”
Cole faced her with a humble expression of defeat as she proudly stood tall. Lawrence honestly couldn’t tell which of them was the real child. But he’d heard that as people aged they became more childish, so maybe this was normal.
“Alright.”
Holo and Cole were nearly the same height, and they played together happily like twins. When Lawrence spoke, they turned to face him at the same time.
“So, do you remember your missions?”
“Yes.”
“Mmhm.”
Cole beat her to the punch. An image of him studying in Akent, the city of learning, entered Lawrence’s mind. Holo gave a fearless yawn as if to declare her impatience, but Cole continued.
“But this is making my heart beat faster.”
“That’s fine.. my advice is to not think of it as lying. Considering that you can make it come true, in that case it won’t be a lie anymore, will it?”
Lawrence spoke in part to ease Cole’s conscience.. even though he was smiling the boy was still plainly nervous.
“Mmhm.. it- it’s alright. I’ll gather as much information as I can.”
He gathered his courage and replied, like a knight preparing for his first battle. Lawrence smacked him on the back in encouragement before continuing.
“I look forward to your results.”
Lawrence believed Cole would grow if he was given an important mission. He wasn’t just a kid wandering around Akent with a stone tablet, all covered in chalk. He had experienced what it was to be cheated and to be expelled
. He also knew what it was like to live in poverty. Lawrence wasn’t lying when he said he was looking forward to Cole’s results.
“Then, I’ll see you later tonight.”
“Of course.”
Cole’s face was different from the one he wore while playing with Holo. He seemed energized as he left them. Despite his small size, they could still feel his determination. Lawrence didn’t have the time to wonder if that was how he looked when he was Cole’s age, because at that moment someone grabbed his sleeve. At least it wasn’t a prostitute, but in a way it was worse: it was Holo.
“Let us go.”
“Ah.. ahhh!”
Holo walked briskly, and when he didn’t immediately follow she turned back to him making a noise of confusion.
“Hmm?”
He sighed in his heart and began walking. If she loved Cole, why did she put him to task like this? Did she simply think that highly of him? Lawrence liked Cole, but he wasn’t sure to what extent he could trust him.
* * *
“Will you be alright on your own?”
Holo and Lawrence boarded a ferry that would take them from one part of the delta to the next, closer to the south side of Gerube. It was pointless for the three of them to move together, so they had opted to split apart and collect information separately.
Cole would blend in with the northern beggars and ask them for information about D’Jean Company. Holo would go to the Church on the south side, acting as a nun traveling north, and request information about the Church’s influence further north along the Roef and Rome rivers. Lawrence would head to the branch of Ron’s Company on the delta and inquire about D’Jean’s activities relating to the wolf-god’s bones.
Since Holo and Cole were smarter than Lawrence, he knew he didn’t have cause to worry. But Holo was a wolf-god herself, ears and tail included, and she was basically spying on her enemies. She may be the most intelligent of the bunch, but he still couldn’t put his mind at ease when he considered her doing it alone.
“I really think I ought to join you-”
Holo, who was weaving her way through the crowded ferry with him in tow, turned around and looked him in the eyes.
Spice & Wolf VIII (DWT) Page 8
