I smiled to myself. “You should be.” I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, already regretting my decision. “Okay. I’ll be there.”
“Thanks, Maddie. I owe you one.”
“You owe me a lot more than one, little brother.”
“Eh, add it to my bill.” I could hear the smile in his voice.
“Okay.” I giggled.
I heard the sound of glass breaking through the phone. “Uh, I gotta go. I’ll see you later.” He hung up before I had a chance to say good-bye.
I dropped the phone down on the couch beside me. The thought of seeing my family filled me with dread, but I had to face them for Liam, even though I knew that in my world brunch was code for family shakedown.
***
“I just don’t understand why you couldn’t make it work,” my mother said for the fifteenth time that morning. I groaned and rubbed my temple. I turned my empty glass with my fingers, all while I trying to search for the waiter without being too obvious.
“I told you, Mother. We are colleagues.” I sighed. “We were never dating.”
“Maybe I should give him a call, arrange for the three of us to have lunch. I’m sure we can smooth things over.”
I caught the eye of the waiter and raised my glass to him. He nodded and scurried off toward the bar.
I took a deep breath and tried once again to explain to my mother that Bryan and I would never be together without telling her the real reason why.
“Mother, like I said before…” I started.
Her face spread into a polite smile as she glanced over my shoulder. “Michael,” she sang through her teeth.
I turned around as Michael weaved his way toward us in a crisp linen suit. The bruising around his nose and eyes had faded, but it was still visible. He smiled and came to a stop behind my chair, resting his hand on the back as he addressed my parents.
“Good morning,” he said. “I heard you folks were in town and thought I’d pop in for a surprise visit.”
He made his way around the table. She presented her cheek to him and he leaned in, pressing a kiss to her cheek. “What a wonderful surprise,” she said with only the slightest bit of annoyance in her voice.
Daddy got to his feet to shake Michael’s hand then he made his way back around the table. “Mind if I join you?” he asked.
“Of course,” my father said. He didn’t notice the glares coming at him from the rest of us at the table.
Michael pulled up a chair and squeezed in between Liam and me. He draped his arm along the back of my chair once he was settled.
“So, what did I miss?” he asked.
My mother smiled. “We were just discussing Madison’s new beau, Bryan Townsend. Have you met him?”
I gaped at my mother. A strange sense of pride came over me.
“Townsend, huh?” Michael said. “So that’s his name.” Michael sat up and snapped his napkin before he laid it in lap. “Now I have a name to put on the lawsuit I’m filing.”
“Lawsuit?” Daddy asked, his interest peaked.
“Yes, sir. He assaulted me, broke my nose.”
“Bryan Townsend broke your nose?” my mother asked, unable to keep the smile from her face.
I rolled my eyes. “Bryan didn’t break your nose,” I said.
“Would you like to see the X-ray’s? Your boyfriends going to cost me several thousand dollars in reconstructive surgery.” Michael stared at me then his eyes softened and he smiled as he placed his hand on top of mine on the table. “I don’t blame you, Maddie bear. I hurt you. You were only trying to even the score. I forgive you.”
Forgive me? He forgives me? I wanted to punch the smug prick myself, cost him a few thousand more in reconstructive surgery.
My mother’s voice interrupted the ranting in my head. “I find it hard to believe that Bryan Townsend would punch someone without cause.”
“Oh for the love of God.” I tossed my hand in the air. “Bryan Townsend did not punch him.” Michael opened his mouth to object. “Sean punched you because you called me a whore.”
Everyone at the table and a few at the table around us who were listening in gasped. Liam and Daddy clenched their fists and glared at Michael. They looked like they both were about ready to clock him themselves.
“Who is Sean?” Mother asked.
“He’s…he’s someone I was seeing.” I dropped my head and studied my fingers. I fought back the tears that threatened to fall whenever I thought of him.
“What about Bryan?” she asked again, and I groaned.
Michael glared at me. “So what, you’ve been fucking both these guys?”
“Language, Michael,” my mother scolded. “You’re making a scene.”
“Damn right I am. My wife has been sleeping with half the God damn city!”
“She’s not your wife,” Liam, Mother, and Daddy chorused.
Michael tossed his napkin down on the table in front of him. “So what? You’d rather spend your life with some kid barely older than Liam.”
My mother’s eyes bored into me from across the table. “What is he talking about?”
“Oh? They don’t know?” Michael said. An evil grin spread across his face. He laughed. “Her little boyfriend, Bryan, Sean, whatever his name is, he’s Liam’s age.” Michael sat back in his seat, looking more than pleased with himself.
All eyes at the table were on me. My parents gaped at me in shock and Michael watched me, his expression smug.
I took a deep breath, wiped a tear from my eye, and then opened my mouth to speak.
“I bought a bar,” Liam blurted.
Suddenly all the attention shifted to him. He shrugged and shot me a sympathetic look.
“Absolutely not,” My father said as he slammed a heavy fist down hard on the table. The silverware jumped, and my mother squeaked and pressed a hand to her chest.
“It’s done. I signed the papers the other day. I am now the proprietor of The Den, a popular downtown pub.”
“If you think for one second that we will be giving you a dime…” My father started and pointed a finger in Liam’s direction.
Liam cut him off quickly. “I won’t be asking. I had a little money saved, got a small business loan and an investor for the rest.”
My mother and father both turned their attention to me, and I shrank under their cold glares. “You did this,” she spat. My shoulders ached as the tension settled deep within my muscles. “You encouraged this? Have you completely lost your mind? You have done some hurtful things to this family, Madison Sinclair, but this one takes the cake.”
That was when I snapped. “How is helping my brother ensure his future hurtful?” I spat back at her. My eyes narrowed as rage coursed through me fueled by years of her dictating how I should dress, speak, act, and love.
My mother matched my glare as we faced off across the table. “His future had already been decided. He was to get this nonsense out of his system, finish law school, and take his place at the firm.”
I shot to my feet and slammed my hands down onto the table. “It’s not what he wants! Liam doesn’t fit into your perfect little image of what you deem is appropriate for a Sinclair and neither do I. We are different, Mother. We want a life of our own choosing, not one that has been chosen for us. When will you get it? We have the right to choose our own happiness.”
I froze as Sean’s words flew out of my mouth. He was right. I’ve spent my life doing everything to please someone else, to make someone else happy. First my mother, then Michael, each of them manipulating me to become their version of the perfect daughter, the perfect wife, but I’m not perfect. No one is. Only one person in my life has ever encouraged me to be myself, to love myself, and I did nothing but push him away.
“You are making a scene,” my mother hissed. “Sit down before you embarrass yourself.”
“You mean before I embarrass you. I’m not an embarrassment to this family. I have an MBA from Duke. I have a high profile position at the top investme
nt firm on the east coast. I am finally free of this lying, cheating bastard,” I said, pointing at Michael beside me, then turned back to my mother. “And now I am free of you, because your opinion, Mother, no longer concerns me.” I grabbed my bag and pushed my chair back. “I’m choosing to be happy.”
I turned and headed toward the door with a huge grin on my face and a little extra spring in my step. I’d almost made it to the door when Michael grabbed my arm. “Madison, wait!”
I sighed. “Why, Michael? Give me one good reason.”
“Because,” he said, “we can make this work. We can start over.”
“Can you honestly remember a single day that we were ever really happy together? Michael, you were just as trapped in our marriage as I was. This is an opportunity for you to find someone to take your breath away, someone you can spend your life with, but that’s not me. It never was.”
Michael looked at me, his eyes sad, but I could see the acceptance there. “What about you?”
I smiled. “I think I’ll be okay.”
Chapter 28
Sean
So there I was, parked on that same bar stool, staring into my empty glass of scotch while Papa Jack stared at me, drying off the bar glasses one by one.
“Didn’t you retire?” I asked.
Papa Jack just shrugged. “Figured you could use someone to talk to.”
“You figured wrong.” I pushed my glass across the bar toward him.
Jack shook his head and leaned his elbows on the bar top. “You ain’t findin’ the answer in the bottom of that glass,” he said as he pushed the empty glass back toward me with a flick of his fingers.
“Won’t know until I try, will I?” I pushed the glass back toward him as the bell above the door jingled, announcing someone’s entrance.
I looked over and sighed.
“Hello, son.”
Jack refilled my glass with a wink. “What the fuck do you want?” I asked as I drained my glass.
“I wanted to talk,” he said.
“A little late for that, don’t you think?”
“I hope not.” He took a seat on the stool beside me and nodded to Papa Jack for a drink. He tilted his head toward my now empty glass, and Jack poured his drink and shook his head when I held out my still empty glass to him. Who do I have to fuck to get a drink around here?
My father stared down at the bar, swirling his drink around in the glass. “I know I made a lot of mistakes.”
I laughed. “You think?”
He sighed. “This isn’t easy for me.”
“Neither was being your son.”
He nodded. “I deserve that.”
I frowned, studying him while trying to figure out his angle. “What do you want from me?”
“A chance,” he said. “To be in your life, in Emily’s life.”
“Are you kidding me? Are you dying? Is that what this is about? You’re trying to reconcile with the kids you abandoned before you kick the bucket.”
He laughed. “No. Let’s just say I met someone who made me realize that the mistakes I’ve made in my past don’t necessarily have to define my future.”
I winced and squeezed my eyes closed tight to fight off the pain that had clawed its way up my throat. “Guess you can add her to the list of things you’ve stolen from me.”
“I was a lousy father, but I’ve never stolen anything from you. I thought I was preparing you for the harsh realities of life. I wanted you to succeed. I didn’t want you to grow up bitter and resentful like I did, but look at you, Sean. That’s exactly what you’ve become.”
I ground my teeth and tightened my fist at my side. Who the fuck did he think he was? Coming in here, judging me and comparing me to him. I don’t abandon the people I love. I don’t bend them to my will, like puppets.
“I’m nothing like you,” I spat.
“Keep this shit up and you will be.” He sighed and ran a hand down his face. “You’re a good man, Sean, and you got there on your own. You live a full life, you have good friends, a family, and a good woman who loves you.”
I scoffed at that last one. “She doesn’t love me. She left me…again.”
“Trust me, son. She loves you. She’s just afraid.”
“Afraid? Of what? Of what other people think?”
“Maybe,” he said. “But I think she’s more afraid of living her own life, making her own decisions.”
I dropped my head, hating that he was right.
“If you love her, give her time. She has to choose for herself.”
I raised my head and narrowed my eyes at him. “Did we just…?” I shook my head.
“Bond?” he said, attempting to finish my sentence.
I made a stink face and leaned back from the bar. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
He laughed and drained the rest of his glass. “Can’t blame a guy for trying.”
I chuckled, feeling a weight I hadn’t realized was there begin to lift off my shoulders.
“I’m sorry, Sean. I’m sorry for not being the father you needed. For not being there when you needed me the most. For everything. I’m sorry.”
“I wish that was enough,” I said. He looked at me. His face fell, and he nodded.
“Well,” he said, getting to his feet. “I’m headed over to the restaurant for the next stop on my apology tour. Wish me luck.”
He headed toward the door. “Dad?” I said. He turned back to face me with hope in his eyes. “Give it time.” He nodded again and gave me a small half smile. “Oh, and watch out for Gran. She’s old but that rolling pin still packs a mean punch.”
He laughed. “Thanks for the heads up.”
I smiled. Maybe there was hope for the old man yet.
***
I left The Den and headed home. When the elevator doors opened on my floor, I stopped cold.
“Madison?”
She looked up at me from her seat on the floor beside my door. She tried to get up and adjusted her neck that was probably stiff from sitting on the hard ground.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
“I wanted to see you.”
I shook my head. “No, I’m not doing this again.” I pushed my keys into the lock and opened the door, slamming it behind me.
A soft knock came from the other side, and I ran my fingers through my hair. I growled in frustration. I hated that her sweet floral scent hung in the air around me.
“Sean?” she asked, her voice muffled through the door.
I leaned back against it and sighed. “Go away, Madison.”
She was quiet for a moment. “I just want to talk,” she said.
I couldn’t do it. I knew that if I opened that door, she’d pull me back into that fucking cycle where she comes back into my life only to break me all over again. Fuck, I’m the girl, again. Jesus Christ! Can’t I just once be in control and break her heart instead of always ending up an emotional heap on the floor?
“Sean? Please?”
I growled and turned, whipping the door open. She stepped back, eyes wide.
“What do you want?”
“You.”
I laughed and nodded my head, feeling a little crazy at the moment. “You want me,” I said, repeating her words to myself. I hated how much I wanted them to be true.
“I’m done running.”
“I’ve heard that one before,” I said, stepping back into the apartment and shutting the door again.
I started down the hall when her voice stopped me. “I’m not going anywhere,” she said, her voice stern. I stopped and turned, looking back at the door. “I’ll stay out here all night if that’s what it takes.”
I marched back down the hall and flung open the door. “Why?”
She crossed her arms across her chest and fixed me with a defiant glare. “Because I love you.”
“You…”
“I love you, and I’m not going anywhere until you talk to me.”
“Jesus, Madison, you left me…twice!
Now you show up here saying you love me and the bullshit you put me through is just supposed to magically disappear?”
“No,” she said then took a step toward me. “But I’m not leaving until you hear me out.”
I shook my head slowly and watched her as she stared me down, waiting for the moment I would break. I sighed. “Fine, talk.”
“Here?” she asked, still standing in the doorway.
I shrugged. “It’s as good a place as any. Easier access to the elevator.”
“I’m done running, Sean.”
I scoffed.
“You were right. I was never going to be happy until I chose it for myself. I’ve wasted so much of my life letting other people make my decisions for me, and I’m done. I have a good life. I love my job, my friends, and I love you.”
“What about your ex? Your parents?”
“Michael needs to figure out his own life. He’s no longer a part of mine. You made me realize that we never really loved each other. I never felt loved or cherished until I met you. And my parents? Well, they will always be in my life, but their opinions no longer matter.”
“Come on, Madison,” I said. “It’s just a matter of time before Margot or your parents convince you that we shouldn’t be together.”
She stepped forward and rested her hands on my chest. “None of that matters any more. I can be happy without you, but I’m choosing to be happy with you.”
I looked down at her. Her eyes were bright, full of joy and hope. It nearly took my breath away.
“I love you, Sean.”
“Say it again,” I said as I brushed my fingers against her cheek.
“I love you,” she whispered.
“No,” I said. She pulled away and looked up at me with a frown. I smiled. “The part about me being right.”
She smiled and slapped at my chest as I leaned in for a kiss.
This kiss tasted of possibilities, of a future filled with ups and downs and choices, but as long as we were together in the end then we’d always be choosing happy above all else.
Choosing Happy (Madison Square #2) Page 28
