by Sid Holt
A programming language has at least two jobs, then. It needs to wrap up lots of algorithms so they can be reused. Then you don’t need to go looking for a square-root algorithm (or a genius programmer) every time you need a square root. And it has to make it easy for programmers to wrap up new algorithms and routines into functions for reuse. The DRY principle, for Don’t Repeat Yourself, is one of the colloquial tenets of programming. That is, you should name things once, do things once, create a function once, and let the computer repeat itself. This doesn’t always work. Programmers repeat themselves constantly. I’ve written certain kinds of code a hundred times. This is why DRY is a principle.
Enough talk. Let’s code!
2.5. The Sprint
After a few months the budget is freed up, and the web re-architecture project is under way. They give it a name: Project Excelsior. Fine. TMitTB (who, to be fair, has other clothes and often dresses like he’s in Weezer) checks in with you every week.
He brings documents. Every document has its own name. The functional specification is a set of at least a thousand statements about users clicking buttons. “Upon accessing the webpage the user if logged in will be identified by name and welcomed and if not logged in will be encouraged to log in or create an account. (See user registration workflow.)”
God have mercy on our souls. From there it lists various error messages. It’s a sort of blueprint in that it describes—in words, with occasional diagrams—a program that doesn’t exist.
Some parts of the functional specification refer to “user stories,” tiny hypothetical narratives about people using the site, e.g., “As a visitor to the website, I want to search for products so I can quickly purchase what I want.”
Then there’s something TMitTB calls wireframe mock-ups, which are pictures of how the website will look, created in a program that makes everything seem as if it were sketched by hand, all a little squiggly—even though it was produced on a computer. This is so no one gets the wrong idea about these ideas-in-progress and takes them too seriously. Patronizing, but point taken.
You rarely see TMitTB in person, because he’s often at conferences where he presents on panels. He then tweets about the panels and notes them on his well-populated LinkedIn page. Often he takes a picture of the audience from the stage, and what you see is an assembly of mostly men, many with beards, the majority of whom seem to be peering into their laptop instead of up at the stage. Nonetheless the tweet that accompanies that photo says something like, “AMAZING audience! @ the panel on #micro-service architecture at #ArchiCon2015.”
He often tells you just how important this panel-speaking is for purposes of recruiting. Who’s to say he is wrong? It costs as much to hire a senior programmer as it does to hire a midlevel executive, so maybe going to conferences is his job, and in the two months he’s been here he’s hired four people. His two most recent hires have been in Boston and Hungary, neither of which is a place where you have an office.
But what does it matter? Every day he does a fifteen-minute “standup” meeting via something called Slack, which is essentially like Google Chat but with some sort of plaid visual theme, and the programmers seem to agree that this is a wonderful and fruitful way to work.
“I watch the commits,” TMitTB says. Meaning that every day he reviews the code that his team writes to make sure that it’s well-organized. “No one is pushing to production without the tests passing. We’re good.”
Your meetings, by comparison, go for hours, with people arranged around a table—sitting down. You wonder how he gets his programmers to stand up, but then some of them already use standing desks. Perhaps that’s the ticket.
Honestly, you would like to go to conferences sometimes and be on panels. You could drink bottled water and hold forth just fine.
3. Why Are Programmers So Intense About Languages?
Many conferences are organized around specific programming languages or specific communities (PyCon for Python programmers; the Strata conference for big data; Oscon for open-source coders); these are ritual events for the people in those communities. Attendees gather, talk, and post the videos on YouTube. Language matters.
Programmers track the success of computer languages the way other people track sports rankings, commenting on web forums such as Reddit (where many languages get their own “subreddit,” and reddit.com/r/programming currently has 620,202 readers), or Hacker News, run by the venture capital firm Y Combinator (a company named after a special kind of function that operates on other functions), or Lambda the Ultimate (named after a series of papers written mostly in the 1970s about the influential programming language Scheme—the more inside-baseball the name, the nerdier the subject matter).
There are hundreds of programming blogs. Many large corporations let their engineers blog (a generous gift, given how many recruiters are hovering). Discussions about programming go on everywhere, in public, at all times, about hundreds of languages. There is a keen sense of what’s coming up and what’s fading out.
It’s not simply fashion; one’s career as a programmer depends on demonstrating capacity in one or more languages. So there are rankings, frequently updated, rarely shocking. As of April 15, the world’s most-used computer languages, according to the Tiobe index (which uses a variety of indicators to generate a single ranking for the world of programming), are Java, C, C++, Objective-C, and C#, followed by JavaScript, PHP, and Python. The rankings are necessarily inexact; another list, by a consulting firm called RedMonk, gives JavaScript the top spot, followed by Java. There are many possible conclusions here, but the obvious one is that, all things being equal, a very good Java programmer who performs well in interviews will have more career options than a similar candidate using a more obscure language.
If you code, by the time a language breaks through to the top ten or twenty, you’ve heard of it, read blog posts about it, heard people lament how terrible or wonderful or misguided it is, possibly watched a few video tutorials, or played with it a little. Taking new languages out for a spin is a good thing for a programmer to do. Often all you have to do is download some files and write a couple lines of code, then decide if you want to go further. Most languages are free to download and use.
Why do people construct and then give away free languages? Well, the creation of a good computer language is the work of an apex programmer. To have produced a successful language is acknowledged as a monumental effort, akin to publishing a multivolume history of a war, or fighting in one. The reward is glory.
Changing a language is like fighting that war all over again, and some languages have at times been trapped in a liminal state between their old, busted selves, and their new, promised version. Perl 5, released in the mid-1990s, was a language uniquely suited to the World Wide Web, and it grew as the Web grew; Perl 6 was supposed to be better in every way, and a redesign began with grand pronouncements in 2000. But after fifteen years of people working continually and often for free on a project they consider in the public interest, there’s still no official Perl 6. (Latest ETA: Christmas 2015.)
The Python language community, keenly aware of the Perl community’s problems, decided to make necessary but difficult changes to the language as part of the transition from Version 2 to Version 3. They would modernize, clean up rough edges—but avoid grand reinventions. Development of Python 3.0 started in 2006; the first working version came out in 2008; and in 2015, the transition is ongoing.
Making a new language is hard. Making a popular language is much harder still and requires the smile of fortune. And changing the way a popular language works appears to be one of the most difficult things humans can do, requiring years of coordination to make the standards align. Languages are large, complex, dynamic expressions of human culture.
3.1. The Beauty of the Standard Library
The true measure of a language isn’t how it uses semicolons; it’s the standard library of each language. A language is software for making software. The standard library
is a set of premade software that you can reuse and reapply.
Take Python, which is “batteries included,” meaning that it comes with tons of preexisting code, organized into “modules,” that you can reuse. Its standard library has functions that let you copy webpages or replace words in a document.
What does that mean, to process text? Well, you might have a string of text (The Quick Brown Fox) and save it in a variable called my_string. So now you can call standard methods on that string. You can say my_string.lower(), and it will make all the words lowercase, producing “the quick brown fox.”
Truly understanding a language’s standard library is one of the ways one becomes proficient in that language. Typically you just visit webpages or read a book.
But the standard library is only the beginning. For many languages—and Python is exemplary—there’s an enormous library of prewritten modules available for nearly instantaneous download, using “package manager” software. A module (or library or package) is code that is intended to extend a language’s capabilities.
Let’s say you work for an advertising agency and need to process through 100,000 pictures and scale and sharpen them.
You type one command: sudo pip install Pillow, and the Pillow module is downloaded, compiled automatically, and placed into the correct directory for later reuse. You have to know, of course, that most modern languages have modules for image processing; you also need to know that Pillow is the most commonly used image-processing toolkit. Knowing how to find that out is part of the job of coding. You might learn it by Googling. You might ask a friend. You might get that information out of a book, or a website like The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Python.
A coder needs to be able to quickly examine and identify which giant, complex library is the one that’s the most recently and actively updated and the best match for his or her current needs. A coder needs to be a good listener.
But what a payoff! Now that Pillow is installed, you have, at your typing fingertips, dozens of routines and functions related to image processing that you can use in your code: change colors, rotate by a number of degrees, scale, convert GIF images to JPEGs, and so forth. Or if you need to do very complex numerical analysis and statistics work, you can download NumPy, and suddenly an enormous range of mathematical algorithms are available to you, hundreds of years of science and research boiled down. Audio processing, interacting with peculiar hardware, speaking to databases—there are packages for all of these things. But you need to know how to find them, what they are called. Code isn’t just obscure commands in a file. It requires you to have a map in your head, to know where the good libraries, the best documentation, and the most helpful message boards are located. If you don’t know where those things are, you will spend all of your time searching, instead of building cool new things.
3.3. The Importance of C
C is as big a deal as you can get in computing. Created by Dennis Ritchie starting in the late 1960s at Bell Labs, it’s the principal development language of the UNIX operating system. Unix (lowercased now, to refer to the idea of Unix instead of the branded version) is a simple operating system—basically it’s a kernel that manages memory and runs software, a large collection of very small utility programs, and a “shell” that helps you knit programs into “shell scripts.” If you couldn’t do what you needed with shell scripts, you might write a new utility in C and add it to the utility library. This was a nice and practical way of working, and it coincided with the rise of various kinds of networks that today we refer to collectively as the Internet. So Unix spread from Bell Labs to academia, to large industrial systems, and eventually leached into the water supply of computing until it was everywhere. And everywhere that Unix went, C was sure to go.
C is a simple language, simple like a shotgun that can blow off your foot. It allows you to manage every last part of a computer—the memory, files, a hard drive—which is great if you’re meticulous and dangerous if you’re sloppy. Software made in C is known for being fast. When you compile C, it doesn’t simply become a bunch of machine language in one go; there are many steps to making it really, ridiculously fast. These are called optimizations, and they are to programming what loopholes are to taxes. Think of C as sort of a plain-spoken grandfather who grew up trapping beavers and served in several wars but can still do fifty pull-ups.
C’s legendary, lucid manual and specification, The C Programming Language, written by Ritchie and Brian Kernighan (known by its nickname, K&R), is a quick and simple read—physically light in comparison with modern, heavy-stock guides to programming on bookstore shelves. This recommended text was published in 1978, when personal computing barely existed, back when a computer was a large piece of industrial equipment used to control a refrigeration system or calculate actuarial tables. It was in K&R that “Hello, world!” became the canonical example program for any language. By convention, almost every introduction to any programming language since then starts with a variation on “Hello, world!”
The Linux kernel is written in C. The software that connects your printer to your computer could be in C. The web servers that serve up your webpages are often written in C. It’s also a good language for writing other languages—Python, PHP, and Perl are written in C, as are many others. C is a language you use for building systems; it has the same role in computing that Latin did among Renaissance academics. You won’t often meet a serious practitioner of the digital arts who doesn’t have at least a passing familiarity. The more serious scholars are pretty fluent.
But remember that list of popular languages? C++? Objective-C? C#? Java? What many people code daily is not actually C, but one of the many Vulgates. Advocates of these languages make various arguments in their favor; they are better for large groups, for “programming in the large.” These languages, they say, organize code into libraries that are shareable, reusable, and less likely to cause pain and suffering. These are object-oriented adaptations of C.
3.4. The Corporate Object Revolution
If you’re going to understand how code works in a corporate environment, you need to understand what object-oriented programming is.
There are many definitions. I’ll wade in and provide my own and face the consequences. Object-oriented programming is, at its essence, a filing system for code. As anyone who’s ever shared a networked folder—or organized a physical filing cabinet—knows, without a good shared filing system your office will implode. C, people said in the 1980s and ’90s, is a great language! An excellent language! But it doesn’t really let you organize things. You end up with all these functions. It’s a mess. I mean, we have this data structure for our customers (name, address, and so forth), and we have all these functions for manipulating that data (update_address, send_bill, delete_account), but the thing is, those functions aren’t related to the data except by the naming convention. C doesn’t have a consistent way to name things. Which means it’s hard to find them later. Object-oriented programming gave programmers a great way to name things—a means of building up a library. I could call (run) update_address on a picture of a dog or an Internet address. That approach is sloppy and dangerous and leads to bugs (our forebears reasoned, and not without precedent), and it makes it hard to program with big teams and keep track of everything.
So what if, whaaaat if, we made a little box called Customer (call it a “class,” as in the taxonomical sense, like a Customer is a subclass of the species human, which is a subclass of mammal, etc.), and we put the data and methods relating to customers into that box. (And by box, it’s literally just “public class Customer {}” and anything inside the {} relates to that particular class.)
I mean, you wouldn’t even need to look inside the box. You’d just download a large set of classes, all nested inside one another, study the available, public methods and the expected data, and start programming. Hey, you’d say, let’s put some data into our object, take some data out. Every time we have a new customer we make a new instance of our class. Code ca
n be a black box, with tentacles and wires sticking out, and you don’t need to—don’t want to—look inside the box. You can just put a couple of boxes next to each other, touch their tentacles together, and watch their eldritch mating.
This works out very well, in theory.
4. Why Are Coders Angry?
There’s a website dedicated to language benchmarks, to measuring how fast certain languages run compared with others, and it includes this preface to stave off riots: “These are not the only compilers and interpreters. These are not the only programs that could be written. These are not the only tasks that could be solved. These are just 10 tiny examples.”
It sometimes appears that everyone in coding has a beef. You can feel it coming off the webpages. There are a lot of defensive postscripts added in response to outrage. “People have reacted strongly to this post,” they’ll read. “I did not mean to imply that Java sucks.”
Languages have agendas. People glom onto them. Blunt talk is seen as a good quality in a developer, a sign of an “engineering mindset”—spit out every opinion as quickly as possible, the sooner to reach a technical consensus. Expect to be told you’re wrong; expect to tell other people they’re wrong. (Masculine anger, bluntly expressed, is part of the industry.)
Coding is a culture of blurters. This can yield fast decisions, but it penalizes people who need to quietly compose their thoughts, rewarding fast-twitch thinkers who harrumph efficiently. Programmer job interviews, which often include abstract and meaningless questions that must be answered immediately on a whiteboard, typify this culture. Regular meetings can become sniping matches about things that don’t matter. The shorthand term for that is “bikeshedding.” (Who cares what color the bike shed is painted? Well…)
