by Debbie Mason
Jack turned to see his wife leaning against the door frame, holding on to her IV.
* * *
Grace held up a hand as Jack came to her side, shaking her head when he suggested she get back into bed. She’d heard everything her mother had said. Skye was right. It was time for Grace to deal with her mother once and for all. What had happened to their son was as much Grace’s fault as Jack’s. If she hadn’t been trying so hard to make everything perfect for her mother, she wouldn’t have told him to take little Jack out for the day. She would’ve gone for that walk with them like Jack had wanted her to, been with him when he went to help Maria.
She smiled at him to temper her rejection. She imagined her refusal to see him earlier had hurt him. He was suffering as much as, probably more than, she was. It wasn’t until her visit with Sawyer and Jill that she’d learned what had happened at the lodge.
Facing her mother, Grace said, “You’ve never been able to forgive me, have you?”
“This is not the time or place, Grace. We do not air our private affairs in public.”
“Moot point, mother. You already did.” She cleared her throat, her gaze moving from Jill to Sawyer to Jack. “When I was twelve, my sister, Faith, drowned. My mother blamed me. Until today, I thought it was my fault. Because of what happened to little Jack, I know now it was an accident.” She took Jack’s hand. “I’m sorry I turned you away earlier. I just needed a little time to get myself together. It wasn’t your fault, Jack. You saved our son. You saved Maria.”
He kissed her temple. “Baby, you don’t have to listen to her. Let me—”
She caressed his clenched jaw. “Yes, I do. I have to do this for me, for us.”
“Faith’s death was not an accident. You were the best swimmer on the swim team. You could’ve saved her if you’d wanted to—”
“My God, Helena, how can—”
“No, Daddy, please let her finish.”
“How, Frank… How can I blame her? I’ll tell you how. I heard her that day. I heard her tell her seven-year-old sister, who followed her around like an adoring puppy, that she was sick to death of her. That she hated her and wished she’d never been born.”
Tears welled in Grace’s eyes and spilled down her cheeks. It was true. She’d yelled the words in the heat of anger and frustration. Words she’d regret to her dying day. “Children say cruel and hateful things. I loved my sister, but I didn’t want to spend every waking minute with her. I was twelve, and it was the summer holidays. I wanted to spend time with my friends, and I wasn’t allowed to because I had to look after Faith.”
The edges of her mother’s mouth whitened. “Are you blaming me?”
“No, it was an accident. I didn’t know she’d followed me when I snuck out of the house. And I didn’t know you were…” too drunk to pay any attention, she silently finished. There was only so much dirty laundry she’d air in public. “And I didn’t know she’d gone in the river until I heard her screaming for help. And I did help her, Mother. I almost died getting her out of that undertow. We’d just started our CPR course, but I did my best. It took the ambulance thirty minutes to get there, and I never stopped trying to save her.” She was crying now—so were her father and Jill—and the last words came out garbled. Jack had left her side a few moments ago and returned now with a wheelchair. “Sit down, princess,” he said, helping her into the chair.
Her father came and crouched in front of her, taking her hands in his. “Never, not once, did I blame you.”
“You sent me away.”
He bowed his head and briefly closed his eyes before raising his gaze to hers. “I did what I thought was best for you. Your mother…” He gave a weary shake of his head. “We should’ve talked about this before now.” With a squeeze of her hands, he stood up. “I have to do something, something I should’ve done a long time ago. I’ll be back. You take care of my baby girl, Jack.”
He went to Grace’s mother, who stood clutching her purse in a grip as tight as her face, and took her by the arm.
“I hope your son is all right,” Helena said stiffly.
“Thank you,” she said quietly as her father led her mother away. Grace didn’t know if her mother would ever forgive her, but she thought she’d finally be able to forgive herself.
* * *
Grace woke up in the middle of the night to the steady beep of the monitors. Since she’d refused to leave her son’s side, Dr. McBride had had a bed brought in for her. She reached through the bars and touched little Jack’s small hand, startling at the sound of Jack’s voice. The room was dark enough that it made it difficult to see him sitting in the chair across from their son’s hospital bed.
“Matt checked him an hour ago. He’s happy with his progress. He’s going to be fine, Grace.”
They’d spent the day and most of the evening talking about little Jack and her sister, and why Grace had never confided in him. Jack seemed to understand that the topic had been forbidden in her home, her guilt so difficult to deal with that she’d followed the course her mother’d mapped out all those years ago.
“I thought you were going home to get some sleep.”
He smiled as he came to her side. “I tried. Got to the front doors of the hospital and couldn’t leave. I grabbed a coffee, talked with Nell, Ted, Fred, and old man Murray for a bit.”
She patted the bed, and he lay down beside her. Curving his arm around her waist, he tucked her against him, resting his chin on top of her head.
“He looks so small,” she said, stroking little Jack’s arm through the bars.
“Yeah, but he’s a fighter.”
“Just like his dad.”
“Just like his mom.”
She turned her head to look at him, and he kissed her nose. “Are you okay?” After going through a similar experience, she knew how those images remained burned in your brain.
“Getting there. How about you?”
“Same. Did Sawyer tell you about the time I lost little Jack?” He shook his head. “It was the night we found out you were alive. I was making a sugar plum cake in honor of your birthday and little Jack was helping. He smushed a flag into the wildflower garden, and I couldn’t let it go. I couldn’t stand that the last cake I made for you wouldn’t be perfect. While I was fixing the flowers, he escaped through the back door. If it weren’t for Sawyer finding him in the alley, who knows what would’ve happened.”
“It’s good to know I’m not the only one he takes off on.”
“I’m going to work really hard to relax, Jack, to not worry so much if everything isn’t perfect. Now that I’ve come to terms with my guilt, it should be easier, but…” She shrugged. “I’m going to try.”
“So am I.”
She frowned. “You’re not controlling or a perfectionist.”
He laughed, low and deep. “Yeah, you’ve pointed that out to me occasionally. The perfectionist part. But in talking with Skye tonight, I realized I’ve got some control issues of my own. I’ve made things harder for you by not deciding what to do with my life.”
“You don’t have to—”
He gently pressed a finger to her lips. “Let me finish.”
“No.” She kissed his finger before removing it from her lips. “Since you’ve come home, you’ve bent over backward to make me happy. Even though you hated the bakery, you kept it. Same goes for the house on Sugar Plum Lane. The only reason you bid on it was to make me happy. It’s my turn, Jack. You’re going to take your time and figure out what you want to do. To figure out what will make you happy. And if that means you want to move back to the base, we’ll move. If you… What?” she said as he looked down at her, an unreadable emotion in his eyes.
“Grace Flaherty, I adore you,” he said, brushing his lips over her hair. “And I appreciate what you’re trying to do. But part of my problem with Christmas and the bakery, even buying a house, was tied up in the past. To be honest, the idea of having our own home was starting to grow on me. And the bakery’s doi
ng well, better than well. Our future is the only thing that matters, baby—yours, mine, and little Jack’s. So what do you think about living in Christmas?”
“Are you sure, Jack? I need this to be as much about you as it is about me.”
“Yeah.” He smiled. “Half the town showed up today to check on you and little Jack. We’ve got a good support system here, lots of friends and family.”
“We do. We’re very lucky.”
“Yeah, we are. And, princess, I have a job if I want it. Sawyer talked to the head of search and rescue. They’re looking to hire.”
“That would be perfect…” she began, then decided to banish that word from her vocabulary. Life wasn’t perfect. It wasn’t meant to be. If you didn’t go through the bad times, the sad times, you wouldn’t appreciate how incredible the good times were. “I mean, it sounds like something you’d enjoy. What do you think?”
“I get to come home to you and little Jack every night and keep flying—can’t get much better than that.”
She was about to agree with him when little Jack’s fingers moved in her hand. “He’s waking up.”
Jack was off the bed and to their son’s side before Grace had pushed herself upright.
“Hey, buddy,” he said gruffly as he lowered the rail and took little Jack’s other hand.
“Da, me want cake.”
“Okay, we’ll see what we can do about that.” Jack looked at Grace, his eyes glassy. “I think we’re all going to be just fine.”
“I think so, too,” she said and kissed her son’s head. “Hi, baby.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
With his son in his arms, Jack stood among the spectators crowded near the starting line and anxiously scanned the triathlon participants for his wife. Dr. McBride wouldn’t let him take part because of his sprained knee. Grace had been hoping he’d tell her she couldn’t participate, either, and wasn’t too happy when he declared her good to go. “There’s Mommy,” Jack said when he spotted her honey-blonde head. He smiled at the sight of her in the purple bathing suit that showed off her incredible long legs and toned body.
A hand clapped him on the shoulder, distracting him from thoughts of what he planned on doing to her gorgeous body later that night. “Hey, Jack,” Grace’s father said, taking little Jack from him. He frowned. “Why’s he wearing a leash?”
Jack ignored the general’s question. He’d argued with one Garrison about the harness already today. Grace now worried they might be harming their son psychologically by using the leash and thought a good compromise would be using a stroller. Jack heartily disagreed.
“Grace’ll be glad you made it. She was worried you weren’t going to be back in time.” His father-in-law had put Helena on the plane and stayed in Christmas until he was sure his grandson and daughter were going to be all right. He’d returned home four days ago to start divorce proceedings, something he and Grace had talked about before he did.
“Wouldn’t miss it. Now, where’s my baby girl?”
Jack pointed Grace out just as the starting pistol went off. Everyone surged into the water, everyone except his wife. After what she’d been through, Jack knew this was the part of the race that worried her most. But this morning she’d seemed determined to conquer her fears, excited even to get back in the water. It was as if she needed to do this one last thing to be able to move forward. Jack went to duck under the barrier. He didn’t want her to face this alone. His father-in-law’s hand on his arm stopped him.
“No, son, she’s gotta do this on her own.”
Jack’s hands balled into fists at his sides as he watched her stand on the water’s edge with her arms wrapped around her waist. “What’s wrong with her?” a few people behind him asked. Jack was about to ignore Frank’s directive when Maria glanced in Grace’s direction.
He’d seen Maria a couple days ago in the hospital. She’d been teary-eyed and apologetic. She’d asked his permission to speak to Grace and see little Jack. It hadn’t been an easy meeting for either of the women.
Maria ran back to Grace and tugged on her hand. He held his breath, releasing it when his wife entered the water.
Ten minutes later, he watched in awe as Grace’s powerful strokes cut through the white-capped waves, and she took the lead.
His father-in-law chuckled. “Guess I should’ve mentioned that Grace had Olympic times the last swim meet she participated in.” Frank sobered. “If she weren’t as strong a swimmer, I would’ve lost them both that day.”
“Mamma,” Jack shrieked, pointing at his mother, who ran onto shore.
Jack and his father-in-law, along with the crowd, cheered. Grace waved, then gave Jack that dimpled smile he adored and a thumbs-up. He returned both, his chest tight with pride. His wife was one amazing woman.
Since the bike trails they’d be taking next weren’t easily accessible, they decided to head for the finish line instead. Gage and Madison were there with Annie and Lily. “How’s she doing?” Madison asked.
“She’s in the lead after the swimming event,” Jack said, unable to keep the proud smile from his face.
Madison threw up her arms. “Is there anything she’s not good at? Please tell me there is, because I’m seriously thinking about not being friends with her anymore. It’s too hard on my self-esteem.”
Two hours later, his wife crossed the finish line just ahead of Nell, Mrs. Tate, and Mrs. Wright.
Grace fell into his arms. “Please tell me I beat them. I’ll never live it down if I didn’t.”
“You beat them by a nose.”
Madison came over and pinned a ribbon on her. “I love you, and I’d miss being your friend, so I’m glad you suck at biking and running.”
“You wait until next year,” Frank said, handing a sleepy little Jack to Grace. “I’m going to take over her training, and you’ll be pinning a first-place ribbon on her.”
Grace glanced down at her purple ribbon. “One hundred and fiftieth. How many participants were there?”
“You don’t want to know.” Madison grinned.
“How did Maria do?” Grace asked, bouncing their now-wide-awake son on her hip.
“Twentieth overall, first in the women.”
Grace smiled. “That’s great. I hope someone took her picture for her book.”
Madison waggled her brows. “Dr. McSexy did.”
Jack rolled his eyes and Gage did the same.
“I’m thinking of having him deliver my baby.” Madison patted her stomach. Gage shot her a not-going-to-happen look.
“Me, too. No, I’m not pregnant yet,” Grace said when they all looked at her. “At least I don’t think I am. Come on.” She took Jack’s hand. “Ceremony’s in two hours.”
Jack slanted her a look as they headed to the truck. Caught up in his conversation with Nell and her friends, her father trailed behind. “Just so you know, Dr. McSexy is not delivering our baby. Dr. McBride is.”
“We’ll see. I have to get pregnant first.”
“How about we work on that tonight?”
* * *
Maybe they should’ve held off on the baby making until tonight after all, Jack thought with a grin. They had ten minutes to spare before the ceremony.
“Grace, are you guys ready?” Jack asked as he walked into the living room, tucking his uniform shirt into his pants. Grace knelt on the floor wearing a white sundress, looking from the framed picture of her sister that she’d set on the bookshelf yesterday to little Jack, an odd expression on her face. “What is it?” he asked.
“Did you tell him who this is?”
“No, why?”
She turned the picture to their son, pointing at the cute little blonde with the gap-toothed smile. “Tell Mommy who this is again?”
“Fafe.”
“You’re right, baby. It’s your auntie Faith.”
“Fafe kiss Jack.”
“Oh.” Grace covered her mouth, blinking back tears.
Jack crouched beside her, sliding a supportive
arm around her shoulders. “Where did you see your auntie Faith, buddy?”
“Pool. Fafe love you.” He threw himself at his mother, wrapping his arms around her neck. “Fafe say…” His brow furrowed. “Jack kiss Mama for…”
“Your auntie Faith told you to kiss your mommy for her?” Jack asked him.
His face brightened, and he nodded, then frowned when his mother started to sob, burying her face in his neck. “Mama sad.”
“No, baby.” She lifted her head and sniffed. “Mommy’s happy.” She looked up at Jack. “Do you think it’s really possible?”
He wiped her tears away. “Yeah, I do.”
“The hardest part of losing her was not being able to tell her that I loved her, that I didn’t mean what I said.”
“She knew that, princess. She saw you coming to save her that day, didn’t she? Saw you risking your life to save hers.”
“Just before she went under that last time, I told her to hang on and not panic. I told her I’d get her out, but…”
Little Jack framed his mother’s face with his small hands. “Fafe loves Mama.”
Smiling through her tears, Grace nodded, then whispered, “I love you, Faith.”
* * *
Beneath a cloudless blue sky, Grace stood toward the front of the crowd gathered in the park. Her husband, looking so handsome he could’ve stepped off the big screen, released a surprised laugh when his three crew members, Josh, Quinn, and Holden walked up the two steps to the stage. Grace met Jack’s gaze and smiled. He gave his head a bemused shake and mouthed, Thank you.
“What is it about a man in uniform?” Skye, who came to stand beside Grace in her Sugar Plum Cake Fairy costume, mused. “I mean, Jack’s hot, but today, wow, just holy fricking wow.”
“He’s mine, get your own.” Grace laughed. “And where were you today? I didn’t see you at the race. In fact…” She looked at each one of her friends standing in the row. “Where were all of you? I didn’t see any of you at the triathlon. I know there were lots of people, but I should’ve seen at least one of you.” And she would’ve heard Sophia.
