by Amber Heart
“Hey, Vanessa. Yeah, I picked her up early this morning. We tried not to wake you up.” The sour expression on Blaze’s face could have curdled milk.
“We just thought she was being lazy.” The girl couldn’t resist getting a dig in at Rosalie. Eric’s face went stark white and he rounded on her. He was so angry that his words came out between clenched teeth.
“That girl is so far from lazy you don’t even know what you’re talking about. She actually goes to class, unlike you, and she passes those classes, unlike you. She is the sweetest person you’ll ever meet, and all you want to do is tear her down. For what? For me? Please. There is nothing in the world that you could do that would make me choose you over her. That girl,” he had to take a breath and point towards Rosalie’s closed door, “Is going to be my wife one day. I’m not sure when yet, or where, but it’s going to happen. The next time I see you disrespect her like you just did, I’ll bury you.” His eyes blazed with anger as he left the dorm room. Blaze stared after Eric like she’d lost the most important thing in her life. Vanessa, meanwhile, was staring at Blaze with a look of satisfaction. It had been Vanessa who had told Eric exactly what was going on. She’d warned her friend to leave Rosalie alone, and even though she hadn’t done anything per se to sabotage Rosalie’s relationship, she was tired of hearing Blaze put her down. Now she’d been put in her place by the one person she actually cared about. Vanessa hoped that would be enough to teach her a lesson.
Eric drove home, where he was instantly confronted by his mother. He cursed himself for letting himself get lost in thought, because it always put him on autopilot when he drove, and autopilot meant home.
“Where have you been? Don’t tell me that you’ve been with that little gutter mouse the whole time.” His mother was fuming, and he didn’t care. He loved her to death, but lately, she’d been driving a wedge between them with all the dating talk.
“Yes, actually, I was with Rosalie. And I meant what I said at the club. I’m going to marry her. She might want six months for me to be sure, but I can promise you that I am serious as a heart attack. I don’t care what you have to say about it, and I don’t care if you disinherit me. I’m going to be with her, and I’m going to give her everything she ever dreams of.” The vehemence of his words were almost like a slap in the face for her, and she looked stunned that he’d talked to her that way. Before she could gather her thoughts, Eric walked right past her and into the house. His thoughts were still on Rosalie. In a way, he was kind of happy that she’d asked him to wait. He realized now how selfish he’d been by trying to prove a point to his mother by using her, and springing a proposal on her out of nowhere like that. He was lucky that she didn’t flat out tell him no. He decided that he was going to start putting together a resume right away to apply for a job. He didn’t care what his mother said or thought. He was his own person, and he was going to live life his own way. Right now, Rosalie was his world, and he was going to make sure that he took care of it.
He sat down at his laptop and started typing. It hit him that he really didn’t have much work experience, and that was going to hurt him in the long run. He chuckled sarcastically. Now was the time that he actually needed to use his real name. If he was lucky, they would see that and want him to be a part of whatever company he applied to in the hopes that his parents would make donations. All in all, he was a hard worker, and very determined. If it got him his foot in the door, his attitude and work ethic would keep him the job. A half hour later found his resume finished, and him scouring help wanted ads online, applying to what felt like hundreds of jobs. Every time he read one, all he could see was Rosalie’s face. If he had to work two or three jobs to make sure that she had the money for her tuition, he would see to it. The laptop was something she’d needed, and it was something he’d been more than happy to give her. Just like he was more than happy to give her the world. After submitting the fortieth resume, he decided to call it a day. He hoped that some of them would call him back, because he really didn’t have anything else to do for the rest of the day. But he would be damned if he left his room and let his mother start in on him again…
Chapter 16
Rosalie wasn’t quite sure what was going on, but any time that Blaze wanted to come and see Vanessa, she would ask if Rosalie was home. If she was, she would have Vanessa meet her somewhere else. Not that Rosalie was complaining, because she didn’t like the girl, and no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t like the girl. Not after the things she’d said. Vanessa seemed to be fine with it, and would even cancel on Blaze just to hang out with Rosalie. The two girls had gotten pretty close, and it made Rosalie feel more and more guilty. Vanessa was her best friend. The best friend she’d ever had in her life, but she was keeping this huge secret about Eric from her. It killed her inside. She felt like she owed them both loyalty, and she was caught in the middle. Rosalie decided that she was going to have a talk with Eric. Maybe he would let her tell Vanessa the truth. She took out her phone and dialed, heart racing that she was even asking this. He’d trusted her innately with this information, and she had no problem keeping his secrets, but now it was killing her, and she hated that she felt like she was betraying his trust even by asking for permission to tell one person. It rang. Eric picked up on the third ring.
“Hello?” His voice was sleepy, and more guilt weighed her down. She’d woken him up. It had woken her up in the middle of the night, and she’d done her best to wait until a reasonable time to call him, but it turned out that she was still too early.
“Hey, it’s me. I’m sorry for waking you up. Do you want me to call you back later?” Rosalie bit her lip. She was considerate enough to do that if he wanted, but she really hoped that he would just let her talk about it now because it was really bothering her. Eric yawned widely from the other end of the phone.
“No, it’s fine, babe. What’s going on?” Rosalie closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Wincing, she launched into the story.
“I, um, I just wanted to ask you something.” There was a serious tone to her voice, and it instantly woke him up.
“Are you ok? Did something happen? Do you want me to come get you?”
“No! No, I’m ok. I just was thinking about something last night, and it was bothering me, so I wanted to call and ask you about it.” Silence on the other end, and it only made her more nervous. “Vanessa is my best friend. I’ve told her everything except the truth about you and your family. I kind of feel like I’m lying to her, but I want to keep you safe and your secret, so I wanted to ask you first if I could tell her.” She said it all in a rush, hoping that he wouldn’t get mad at her. The silence stretched on.
“Can you trust her?” There was a tone to his voice that said he didn’t think that it was a good idea, but if she could convince him, then he would be ok with it. Rosalie swallowed hard. Yes, it had only been a few months since they’met and gotten to be friends, but Rosalie was willing to bet that yes, she could trust her. She swallowed hard, hoping that she was putting her faith in someone she could trust.
“Yes.” There was a firmness to her voice that she was sure would convince him. He whistled low on the phone and the awkward pause made her nervous all over again.
“Ok. You can tell her. I might regret it later, but it’s ok. I’m sorry for putting you in that position. I know that it couldn’t be easy to have a good friend and not say anything about one of the most important things in your life.” There was a smile in his voice, and it set her at ease.
“A very important part of my life if you don’t change your mind in six months.” She’d meant it as a joke, and if he would have been in front of her, she would have winked at him. The silence that came after her sentence was different, tense, and it wiped her smile off her face immediately. He was going to change his mind.
“Look, Rosalie, I know you gave me the six month window to change my mind, but I don’t need six months.” Silent tears slid down her cheek as she thought of
something to say. He was going to break up with her. Right before her birthday. This was going to be the worst birthday of her life. “I’m sorry, but I’ve got to go.” Click. He’d hung up. No ‘I love you’, nothing. Rosalie stared at her phone like it was a creature from another planet. The dial tone mocked her, so she flipped it shut and threw it across the room with a scream of pain. She burst into tears and threw herself down on her bed, face in the pillow to cry. It hurt. More than she ever thought it would. She’d fallen in love with this bad boy, then found out that he really wasn’t so bad, just putting on an act. Now he was going to break her heart, and she was going to spiral down into the darkness.
“Rosalie! Are you ok?” Vanessa came bursting into the room, eyes wide, chest heaving like she’d just run a marathon. That’s when it hit her that her scream and the sound of the phone hitting the wall could bring someone else running.
“I’m fine.” Her voice was wooden, completely devoid of all emotion, and muffled from the pillow.
“Aw, honey, you don’t have to lie. What’s going on? Talk to me.” So Rosalie sat up and told Vanessa the whole story, from beginning to end of the first time that she’d ever seen Erik, up to and including the conversation that she’d just had with him. Vanessa looked like she was going to cry, too, when Rosalie finished. Vanessa pulled her friend into her arms, rocking her back and forth as she cried. “It’s going to be alright. I don’t know how, yet, but it will be, you’ll see.” Rosalie wanted to believe her friend with all her heart, but something gave her a sinking feeling in her gut, making her think that it was all wishful hoping rather than truth.
***
Eric hung up the phone. He scrubbed his hands over his face. He cursed himself for being so stupid. Of course she would want to tell Vanessa the truth. She was the only real friend that Rosalie had, and he was getting in the way of her being happy. He’d gotten off the phone because his own guilt had started to worm its way into him. Yes, she’d given him six months. He knew he didn’t need that. He loved her, and he wanted her to be his wife. He’d gotten the idea the night before that he wanted to do something special for her birthday, and now he was thinking that he was going to put a real proposal into it. A sweet and romantic one like she deserved, not a spur of the moment, prove something to his mom proposal that wasn’t even about her. Which meant that he had a lot of work to do. Christmas timeframe would have been better, because he’d thought of a horse drawn sleigh ride to start things off. Now he didn’t want to wait that long, so he would have to adjust his plans. There were horse drawn carriages that ran in the warmer seasons, and he supposed that would be a good substitute. He picked up his phone and started to look around in the yellow pages app.
“Hello? Yes, I was wondering if I could book a horse and carriage? Two weeks from tomorrow. Yes. To pick me up from 8537 Whiteacre Ave.” Everything went well until he gave the address. Now the man was flustered. He started stuttering, saying he wasn’t sure that his humble carriage and his old nag would be elegant enough. Eric rolled his eyes. He really hated his legacy at times. He managed to calm the man down and assured him that everything would be just fine. He gave a wry chuckle. At least his name would ensure that the man wasn’t late. Now, he had to make reservations for dinner in the fanciest place in town. They were a little less surprised at his name, and the waitress even had the nerve to tell him she had to check to make sure that they had a table for him. He knew for a fact that they always had open tables because it was so expensive, hardly anyone ever went there. He swallowed his anger but remained polite in order to secure the reservation. Now, the one thing he wanted to do to make this proposal special, was to book the solarium. It was beautiful during the day, but there were some night blooming flowers that made it stunning, and it was remote enough to see the stars shimmer at night. That was where he wanted to propose. Now, the only thing he had left to do was get her a gift. Shit. What was he going to get her? A lightbulb went on in his head. Vanessa. She would know exactly what Rosalie would like. He got up and got himself dressed, intent on heading over there in an hour or so because Rosalie had a class, but Vanessa was off.
***
Rosalie sat in class, staring at the professor without really seeing her. This woman was married, and she was always disheveled, had too much makeup on, and stains on her clothes. How was it possible for her to find her true love, when Rosalie considered herself much more put together and was now down on her luck? Granted, Erik hadn’t officially said the words that would break them up, but she could feel it coming. That feeling of cold and rejection swallowed her up. Her notebook sat in front of her without a single letter written in it from the lecture. Her eyes were glazed with pain and tears, and she stared off into nothingness. Her hand stayed down where no one would call on her to answer any questions. Had she been more aware of her surroundings, she would have noticed that her classmates were giving her strange looks because of her behavior.
She didn’t even hear the bell when it rang to dismiss the class. It took someone getting up and walking behind her down the aisle, jostling her with a backpack, to wake her up. She pulled herself out of her daydream, mechanically put things in her bag, then walked from the room almost like her body was moving on autopilot. She managed to get out of the classroom and across the campus to her dorm room. She was hoping that Vanessa was going to be there so she could cuddle up on the couch with her friend, watch a movie and eat junk food. Vanessa had told her to just skip class, but that was something that Rosalie couldn’t bring herself to do, even though she felt completely empty inside. When she opened the door, she saw that Vanessa wasn’t home. The dorm was completely silent, no TV, no music, nothing. Looking at the coat rack that sat in the corner by the door, she saw that Vanessa’s jacket and purse were both gone. A fresh wave of tears flowed out of Rosalie, and she went straight to her room, got her bathroom bag and went down to the showers to drown her sorrows in scalding hot water. It was like she was trying to cleanse the feeling of betrayed love from her soul.
Chapter 17
When Rosalie came home from class, she was looking forward to a night of vegging on the couch, watching movies with Vanessa, but Vanessa wasn’t home. A heavy weight settled on Rosalie’s shoulders, and she dragged her feet until she made it into her room, closing and locking the door behind her. Unbidden, tears slid down her cheeks. It made her angry because they seemed to be broken, just leaking whenever they wanted. It made her feel weak that she couldn’t even control her own body. Being weak was one thing, but being unworthy…
That was how Eric had made her feel. No. That was how Eric’s mother had made her feel. All she could think was that it had somehow finally gotten through Eric’s head, too, and he was waking up to see what his mother had wanted him to all along. It hurt, but it made her glad that she’d given him the six months to think about whether or not he wanted to really be with her. Something told Rosalie that this was going to be the deepest cut that she’d ever had, and she didn’t know what to do to try to start healing. She threw herself down on her bed and let all the tears she’d built up come flowing out of her. At some point, she must have fallen asleep, because when she woke up it was dark outside. She saw the clock on her nightstand, and it told her that it was five minutes till midnight. Five minutes until her birthday. She checked her cell phone. No missed calls, texts, or emails. Fresh tears threatened that Eric hadn’t even gotten a hold of her. She was left to assume that he would now never talk to her again, and that she should just move on. Rosalie burrowed down into her blanket and had to flip the pillow over so she had a dry place to sleep.
When the sun came up, Rosalie had tossed and turned until she had bags the size of golf balls under her eyes. Her pillow was wet on both sides from her tears, and she felt like she weighed five hundred pounds. She didn’t want to move, didn’t want to get up, didn’t want to live. She rolled over and the sun hit her in the face. Rosalie hissed and rolled the other way, trying to find comfort in her blanket by wrapping h
erself in a cocoon. It was around ten that there was an insistent knock on the door. Rosalie groaned.
“Go away.” The knocking resumed. Rosalie just wanted to be left alone, and this person wasn’t getting the hint. She popped her head out from under the blanket and growled audibly. There was a chuckle on the other side of the door, muffled by the wood, then more knocking. “I said go away!” Her voice was raw from crying, and she buried her head in the blanket again, letting a single tear slide down her cheek. The handle of the door rattled, then turned. Vanessa came in, grinning like an idiot and holding up a bobby pin.
“You know, it’s not hard to get in if I really want to. I was just making sure that you were decent.” The lump of blankets moved just enough to let a hand come snaking out. That hand promptly gave Vanessa the finger, which only made her laugh. “Oh, come on, you. It’s your birthday and we’re going to do it right.” She seized the blanket and gave it a might tug. Rosalie was shocked, but she kept her senses enough to grab the blanket before it was completely gone.
“I don’t care that it’s my birthday. It’s the worst day in the world. Please just go away.” She tried to get her blanket back, but Vanessa wasn’t giving it to her.
“Well that’s just too bad because you have somewhere to be.”
“Yeah, here, under my blanket, in peace and quiet so no one can see me cry.” Grumbling wasn’t getting her anywhere apparently, so Rosalie decided to try sympathy. “I just want to be left alone, ok? I’ve lost the most important thing to me right now, and I just want to sulk until I can find a face that I can put on in front of other people. I can’t face anyone else right now.” Vanessa’s face was impassive, and she just stared at Rosalie.
