The Misadventures of Edgar & Allan Poe
The Tell-Tale Start
Once Upon a Midnight Eerie
The Pet and the Pendulum
VIKING
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First published in the United States of America by Viking,
an imprint of Penguin Group (USA) LLC, 2015
Text copyright © 2015 by Gordon McAlpine
Illustrations copyright © 2015 by Sam Zuppardi
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library of congress cataloging-in-publication data
McAlpine, Gordon, author.
The pet and the pendulum / Gordon McAlpine ; illustrations by Sam Zuppardi.
pages cm.—(The misadventures of Edgar and Allan Poe ; book 3)
Summary: Back in Baltimore, twelve-year-old identical twins Edgar and Allan think they have encountered the ghost of their great-great-great-great granduncle, Edgar Allan Poe, asking them to solve his murder—but really it is their arch-nemesis, Professor Perry, looking for revenge.
ISBN 978-0-698-16918-0
1. Poe, Edgar Allan, 1809-1849—Juvenile fiction. 2. Twins—Juvenile fiction. 3. Brothers—Juvenile fiction. 4. Revenge—Juvenile fiction. 5. Baltimore (Md.)—Juvenile fiction. [1. Poe, Edgar Allan, 1809-1849—Fiction. 2. Twins—Fiction. 3. Brothers—Fiction. 4. Revenge—Fiction. 5. Baltimore (Md.)—Fiction.] I. Zuppardi, Sam, illustrator. II. Title.
PZ7.M47825253Pe 2015
813.54—dc23
[Fic]
2014043909
Version_1
To my brother, Glenn—G. M.
To Tom and Lucy Horrell—S. Z.
Contents
The Misadventures of Edgar & Allan Poe
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Epigraph
CHAPTER ONE: BACK TO SCHOOL
CHAPTER TWO: THE TRUTH ABOUT GHOSTS
CHAPTER THREE: HOME SWEET HOME
Mr. Poe in the Great Beyond
CHAPTER FOUR: HAUNTING THE LIBRARY
CHAPTER FIVE: REYNOLDS WHO?
CHAPTER SIX: LOOK AT THE BIRDY
Mr. Poe in the Great Beyond
CHAPTER SEVEN: O’ER HILL AND DALE
CHAPTER EIGHT: A DINNER TO DIE FOR
CHAPTER NINE: CAPTIVE AUDIENCE
CHAPTER TEN: RATS!
Mr. Poe in the Great Beyond
CHAPTER ELEVEN: NEVERMORE
CHAPTER TWELVE: CRASH LANDING
CHAPTER THIRTEEN: TWO NEW LIVES
Mr. Poe in the Great Beyond
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
—Adapted from Mark Twain
BALTIMORE SUN Science Section C-4
SATELLITE MAY FALL OUT OF SKY
Scientists warn that satellite could reenter atmosphere and crash in populated region
HOUSTON, TX—NASA scientists announced today that the Bradbury Telecommunications Satellite, launched seven years ago, is exhibiting unusual changes in its orbit, which could bring the 1,390-pound object crashing back to Earth.
“The satellite has a fifty percent chance of reentering the atmosphere sometime in the next few days or weeks,” said NASA communications director Maxmore Potkin. “Nonetheless, citizens should not panic, because most of the satellite will be incinerated upon reentry, making for little more than a spectacular light show.”
Other scientists, however, suggest that if even a small portion of the satellite survives reentry and lands in a populated region, the impact could do tremendous damage. Where it might land is impossible to predict. Likewise, the cause for the change in its orbit remains a mystery. “Sometimes things happen that even rocket scientists can’t explain,” said Potkin.
The Bradbury Telecommunications Satellite first made news seven years ago, when its takeoff tragically claimed the lives of Mal and Irma Poe, NASA scientists who failed to leave the rocket during the countdown and were accidentally launched into space.
BACK TO SCHOOL
TWELVE-YEAR-OLD identical twins Edgar and Allan Poe—the great-great-great-great grandnephews of Edgar Allan Poe, famous nineteenth-century author of horror, suspense, and detective stories—sat in adjacent desks in their first period English class. Friends hovered around them, asking for details about the recent events in Kansas and New Orleans that had made the twins famous.
When the bell rang, their teacher, Mrs. Rosecrans, called the class to order, but no one paid her much attention. It was January 5, the first day back from winter break at Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin Middle School, so everyone was still in a holiday frame of mind.
Two weeks off will do that.
Of course, Edgar and Allan had been away from school much longer.
In mid-October, the Poe twins had been suspended from the entire Baltimore City School District on trumped-up charges. In the interim, they’d had amazing adventures. Nonetheless, they were glad to be back and happy to see their friends.
“Did no one hear the bell?” called Mrs. Rosecrans from the front of the room. Edgar and Allan noted that she’d lost weight since they’d last seen her—the glazed doughnut she habitually set on her podium had been replaced by an apple.
Good for her, the twins thought.
“Enough chattering!” she cried. Then she went on more gently: “Class, I understand you all want to welcome back Edgar and Allan. But we have a guest today.”
At Mrs. Rosecrans’s desk sat a dark-haired woman, well-dressed and possessed of a smile made prominent by a bright shade of red lipstick. She wore so much makeup that there was no way of guessing her age; she might have been anywhere between fifty and seventy. She waved a little sheepishly.
“Besides,” the teacher continued as kids started back to their desks and the room finally settled, “I’m sure Edgar and Allan aren’t the only ones to have had exciting adventures over vacation.”
Stevie “The Hulk” Harrison, one of the twins’ best friends, muttered sarcastically, “Sure, we’ve all experienced life-threatening criminal conspiracies, starred in a major motion picture, and discovered pirate treasure.”
“Now, Stevie,” answered Mrs. Rosecrans, tapping the metal podium, “let’s not discount the excitement of ordinary life.”
Stevie said nothing, having learned by being repeatedly kicked out of class that it was better not to push her too far.
She cleared her throat. “Our guest this morning is Miss Re—”
But before she could get the whole name out, the dark-haired woman interrupted. “Please, Mrs. Rosecrans, nothing formal.” She stood and nodded to the class. “Call me Birdy, kids. Everyone does.”
It was clear that Mrs. Rosecrans didn’t approve of adults using first names in a classroom, but she continued. “Class, this is Birdy from Roastmasters, a nationwide public speaking club.” She
turned to her guest and made a show of applauding, which coaxed a polite spattering of sleepy clapping from the class. “Birdy has generously offered to lend her expert analysis this morning to a few brief ‘What I Did Over My Winter Break’ impromptu speeches.”
Public speaking in front of an expert—during first period?
The whole classroom sighed.
“So, who’ll start?” Mrs. Rosecrans inquired.
No one raised a hand or even dared make a sound.
“Come, now. Someone must be willing to get us back into the spirit of learning.” She looked around the room, finally pointing to Stevie “The Hulk.” “You seemed full of vim and vinegar a moment ago, Mr. Harrison, so why don’t you get us started?” She went to stand next to a bookcase.
“Great,” Stevie mumbled as he squeezed out of his desk and went to the podium.
Edgar and Allan thought it too early in the day to inflict their mischievous will on the proceedings. So they sat back like two ordinary students.
They’d just listen.
At least until an opportunity for fun arose.
Birdy rolled her chair out from behind the cluttered desk to the side of the room opposite Mrs. Rosecrans. “Remember to speak slowly and clearly, and to hit every consonant,” she advised. Then, with notepad in hand, she settled like a judge on a TV talent show.
Stevie stood behind the podium, looking from Mrs. Rosecrans at his right to Birdy at his left.
Surrounded.
“Enunciate,” Mrs. Rosecrans said.
He turned to her and nodded.
“And stand up straight,” added Birdy, removing a pencil from behind her ear.
Turning back toward the expert, he squared his shoulders.
“And relax!” the teacher insisted.
He turned once again toward Mrs. Rosecrans. “How am I supposed to relax like this?”
She acknowledged his difficulty. “All right, Mr. Harrison. Just tell us what you did on your winter break.”
Stevie cleared his throat. “Um, over the holidays I went with my family to my aunt’s house in Washington DC, where we ate lots of good food and watched some great games on TV.”
“Details,” Birdy interrupted, her hands fluttering like fledglings about her face. “It’s details that engage your audience.”
“OK,” he murmured. “Turkey with cranberry-orange sauce and the Dallas Cowboys.”
“Dramatic details!” Birdy’s hands now flittered above her coiffed head. “Spice your story with conflict.”
“Conflict?” he repeated. “OK. How about turkey with cranberry sauce versus the Dallas Cowboys?”
The class cracked up.
Birdy didn’t skip a beat. “As your teacher said before, one can find excitement in any ordinary day’s events.”
Stevie sighed. “OK, um, one day my whole family went to the National Air and Space Museum, but the line was so long that my dad said we’d have to go back another time.” He stopped and looked at Mrs. Rosecrans, who shook her head. “OK, I guess that’s not very interesting or exciting,” he acknowledged. Then his face brightened. In excitement, he rose up on his toes as he spoke. “Actually, the most interesting thing was that my family’s cat, Roderick, was stolen by an evil professor and, along with my twin brother, I traveled all the way to Kansas to rescue him. How’s that for exciting?”
At this, the class broke again into laughter, as Stevie had just described the now-famous incident that had set the Poe twins on their recent adventures.
“That’s enough, Stevie!” Mrs. Rosecrans cried. “We want to hear about your time away, not Edgar and Allan’s. The media has covered their exploits quite sufficiently. You may return to your seat.” Then she turned back to the class. “Who’ll go next?”
Again, no one raised a hand.
Mrs. Rosecrans pointed. “Katie,” she announced.
Katie Justus was another of the twins’ best friends. She was smart and stylish, her black hair braided with strings and beads. She moved gracefully to the podium. Then she took a short breath and, without a glance either right or left, started calmly. “Over my holiday, I went with my mom to a five-day ice carving class, where we began by carving simple ice pyramids with chisels and ended by carving ice swans, using little chain saws.” Then a mischievous grin spread across her face. “And then, in Kansas, I not only rescued my cat, Roderick, at a broken-down Wizard of Oz–themed amusement park, but I also exposed the evil, catnapping professor as a wanted criminal and saw to his arrest.”
“That’s enough,” interrupted Mrs. Rosecrans as the other students cheered. “Please, Katie. Not you, too.”
Katie shrugged. “Well, it is an exciting story.”
Mrs. Rosecrans stood and glared at Edgar and Allan. “The two of you are natural troublemakers.”
The twins displayed their most innocent expressions.
“Don’t think being famous gives you special privileges,” she said.
“We don’t,” they answered truthfully, in unison.
“Besides, Mrs. Rosecrans,” Edgar continued honestly, “you should know by now that when we put our minds to disrupting class, it’s a lot worse than this.”
“Well, that’s true,” she acknowledged. Frustrated, she turned and looked over the classroom. “Is there no one who wants to take this opportunity to learn from an actual public speaking expert?”
Riley McHuff raised her hand. She was every teacher’s dream student—so perfect and pliable that she could sometimes be a little aggravating to her classmates. “I’ll be happy to engage in your public speaking exercise, Mrs. Rosecrans,” she volunteered. “Particularly as we have such a distinguished guest here to comment.”
Mrs. Rosecrans looked relieved. “Thank you, dear.”
Riley took her place at the podium.
“‘My Winter Break, by Riley McHuff,’” she started, formally introducing her impromptu speech.
“Excellent poise and introduction,” Birdy commented.
After a pause, Riley grinned uncharacteristically. “So, after solving the crime in Kansas, I made a movie in New Orleans, where I discovered the lost pirate treasure of the Lafitte brothers and managed to solve a two-hundred-year-old murder, to say nothing of also capturing two criminals who turned out to be the mother and daughter of the evil professor, who, in the meantime, had escaped from jail and disappeared somewhere in Asia—”
The class erupted in laughter and cheering.
“Enough!” Mrs. Rosecrans cried, defeated.
Birdy shook her head with a smile.
Riley received many pats on the back as she returned to her seat.
Mrs. Rosecrans turned back to Edgar and Allan. “I give up. It seems all anyone wants to talk about is you two.”
The twins shrugged identically.
“So, which of you would like to come up to tell the class something they don’t already know from the news?”
The Poe twins looked at each other.
Allan or Edgar?
Actually, it didn’t matter, as neither was more nor less inclined than the other toward public speaking. And this was not the only area in which they shared identical views—actually, the Poe twins felt the same about everything. This was not because they lacked opinions. Rather, their identical responses resulted from a secret that almost no one realized—not their best friends nor even their aunt Judith and uncle Jack, who’d raised the twins since their scientist parents had been killed in a NASA accident seven years before.
This was their secret: Edgar and Allan were identical on the inside as well as the outside.
The boys’ two minds acted as one. This made determining which boy was which impossible, even for the Poe twins themselves. Whatever one knew, the other also knew instantaneously, however far apart they were. With two brilliant minds working as one, they could acquire and analyze a
far greater amount of information than any single mind.
Even their famous great-great-great-great granduncle had never conceived of such an oddity. And he had written about many odd things.
Still, Edgar and Allan had never been able to figure out why they were this way.
Only their nemesis, the disgraced fugitive Professor S. Pangborn Perry, was truly aware of their secret, and he was bent on using it for his own nefarious purposes. But in Kansas he had been foiled by the twins’ quick thinking.
“Well, boys?” Mrs. Rosecrans pressed.
“I’ll go,” Allan said, rising from his desk and starting up toward the podium.
WHAT THE POE TWINS DID NOT KNOW . . .
ENCRYPTED PHONE TEXT FROM PROFESSOR S. PANGBORN PERRY TO UNDERGROUND QUANTUM INDUSTRIES, INC.
(RUSH ORDER DEPARTMENT)
The machine I am contracting you to build will consist of a room-size device able to accommodate two twelve-year-old boys tied face up, side by side, on a flat surface. A large blade will be suspended above the boys from the top of the device, like a pendulum. This blade must be sharp enough to cut one or the other of the boys in half (to be determined randomly, with precise fifty-fifty odds). The other boy must survive unharmed. I will fax you the blueprints so that you can begin soon. I will need delivery within the week.
THE TRUTH ABOUT GHOSTS
THE classroom hushed as Allan took his place at the podium.
“My only correction to the outstanding speeches we just heard,” Allan began, “is that in both Kansas and New Orleans, our cat, Roderick Usher, rescued my brother and me just as surely as we rescued him.”
“Good clarification, Allan,” Mrs. Rosecrans commented. “But tell us something new, please.”
First, he considered talking about Em and Milly, whom he and Edgar had met in New Orleans while shooting A Tale of Poe. Like Edgar and Allan, the girls were twelve-year-old twins with a famous nineteenth-century literary ancestor: the poet Emily Dickinson. They had been critically important in the discovery of the buried pirate treasure and the settling of a centuries-old score with the pirate Pierre Lafitte. But Em and Milly already had been on the news.
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