Starting Over (Treading Water Trilogy)

by Force, Marie

  “Anyone would want that.”

  “We went for a ride in his car, and I didn’t realize he had beer with him until it was too late. He was drinking in the car, so I asked him to take me home.” She started to cry again, her face resting against Colin’s chest. “But he said we were going to talk first, and he drove to the beach. He kept telling me how sorry he was and how much he loved me. Then he started to cry and said he couldn’t live without me. He made me cry, too, and one thing led to another… I was so mad at myself after. I’d made a clean break with him, and it took him all of five minutes to get me back.”

  “You loved him.”

  “I really did.” She took a deep breath. “I insisted he let me drive to my house, and when we got there, I took the keys and got out of the car. I was going to talk him into sleeping on the sofa in the basement. My parents liked him, but they had no idea how much he drank. They were always lecturing my sister and me about drinking and driving, so I knew they wouldn’t care if he stayed. We went through the gate to the backyard, and he started wrestling with me for the keys. The whole thing escalated into a screaming match, because I knew if I gave them to him, he’d go meet his buddies and get even drunker. More than anything, I was afraid he’d kill himself in a car accident. So I threw the keys into the pool.”

  She began to tremble in Colin’s arms. He wanted to tell her to stop, but he knew if she didn’t finish this, there’d be no chance for them.

  “He went crazy,” she said in a small voice. “He was screaming and swearing, calling me every name you can think of. He grabbed me by the hair to drag me into the pool and held me under the water, screaming, ‘Get those keys, you fucking bitch!’ He just kept saying it over and over again and was so loud I could hear him underwater. I was struggling to get away from him, but he was so strong. I started to see spots in front of my eyes and knew I was going to drown if he didn’t let me go soon.”

  Listening to her, Colin had tears running down his face, too.

  “That’s the last thing I remember. I woke up in the hospital a week later. Apparently, my sister, Melanie, heard us fighting, but by the time she came outside to see what was going on, he was gone, and I was floating facedown in the pool. We had air-conditioners in our bedrooms, but she hadn’t turned hers on that night, so she was able to hear us. That’s the only reason I’m alive today. She pulled me out of the pool and did mouth-to-mouth to get me breathing again. When I came to and told them what happened, Kevin was arrested and charged with attempted murder.”

  “Jesus,” Colin whispered.

  “I had to testify against him—the first boy I ever loved, the only boy I’d ever made love with. I put him in jail for ten years, Colin.”

  “But you got a life sentence, didn’t you? This is why you don’t date. It’s why you won’t let yourself take a chance on another relationship. He took so much more from you. Ten years was the least he could do.”

  “He was released four months ago. He got sober in prison, and he’s working the program, making his amends. That’s why he wants to see me, but I can’t see him. I just can’t.”

  “You thought I was him tonight when I pulled up on the bike.”

  “Yes.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said, brushing his lips over her hair.

  “I was so glad it was you—and not just because you weren’t him.”

  “I’m not him.” Colin tilted her face to receive his kiss. “I’d never, ever hurt you.”

  “I’m starting to believe that.”

  “You can believe it.”

  “This last month, knowing you were out there somewhere, it was just…”

  “Torture?” he asked, using his own word for it.

  She nodded.

  “I’m right here, Meredith, and I love you.” He kissed her with a new sense of urgency, knowing if she sent him away this time he’d never survive it. “Has there been anyone else? Anyone since him?”

  She shook her head.

  “Let me show you how it’s supposed to be. Let me show you what it’s like to have someone love you the way you deserve to be loved. We can take it slow…” His breath got caught in his throat when she dragged a fingertip lightly over his bottom lip.

  After a long pause filled with hope and possibility, she said, “Show me, Colin.”

  Chapter 28, Day 75

  The patter of raindrops on the roof would forever remind Brandon of this night with Daphne. He’d devoted himself entirely to her pleasure the second time, and her breathless moans had driven him wild with love and a burning passion he hadn’t known he was capable of. In the quiet after the storm of their loving, his heart beat in rapid time with the rain falling on the tin roof.

  Her hand blazed a lazy trail over his chest. “Who was she, Brandon? The woman you loved but couldn’t have?”

  He sighed. “She’s on that list of shameful things I told you about. I’m afraid if I tell you, it’ll change—”

  She stopped him with her fingers on his lips. “I love you. Nothing you tell me will change that.”

  The unexpected rush of emotion filled him so completely it was almost painful. He turned on his side to face her. “I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you.”

  “To begin with, you loved my child like no one but me ever has.”

  “Loving her—loving both of you—is the easiest thing I’ve ever done.” All at once he wanted her to know his shameful secrets so he could put them behind him and focus on the life he wanted so desperately with her and Mike. “She was Aidan’s wife, Sarah.” If Daphne was shocked, she did a good job of hiding it. “But she wasn’t his wife when I fell for her.” Swallowing his fear, he told her the whole story—from that first day on the beach to confessing it all to Aidan in Vermont.

  Tears glistened in her eyes when he was done.

  “You’re appalled, aren’t you?”

  “No.” She wiped the grim expression from his face with the gentle caress of her fingers. “It’s so sad. No wonder you turned to alcohol.”

  That she understood, that she was on his side, told him more about how much she loved him than anything else ever could. “Alcohol wasn’t the answer. I found that out the hard way.” Since he was on a roll, he told her about what he had done in a drunken blackout to Aidan’s girlfriend and how he’d landed in rehab the next day. “At the time, I thought my brothers were out to get me, but now I know they saved me by getting me into rehab when they did. I don’t know how much longer I could’ve survived living the way I was.”

  “I can’t believe that you’re still so sweet and generous after everything you’ve been through. It didn’t make you bitter.”

  “Oh, I was bitter for a long time, believe me. I felt like I’d been roped into a career I didn’t want, my brother got the girl I was supposed to have, my complaints went on and on. I was so resentful, and I can see now how stupid that was—and how destructive. I think I’m becoming what’s known as a ‘grateful alcoholic.’”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Well, if I hadn’t been through all that crap, I’d never appreciate what I have now. With you.” He smoothed the hair back from her forehead. “I’m in this for keeps, Daphne. I hope you know that.”

  “I’d be terribly disappointed if you weren’t and so would Mike.”

  “We’re going to have it all—a nice big house where you can have your garden and a brother or sister for Mike. Hell, maybe even both.”

  She smiled at the picture he painted, but her eyes were far away from him.

  “Hey, where’d you go?”

  “You make it sound so easy, like we can really have a normal life together.”

  “We can. We will.”

  “But not if—”

  “Don’t.” He silenced her with a kiss. “Not tonight. Tonight’s for us, okay? Soon enough, you won’t have to worry about that anymore.”

  She surrendered to his kiss and sighed when he rolled on top of her.

  “I promised you a trifecta,” he sa
id with a smile.

  “And do you always keep your promises?”

  “I do now.”

  Colin watched Meredith sleep and knew he would do whatever it took to wake up to that face forever. Her bedroom was done in tasteful shades of what he now knew was her favorite color. His memories of discovering the pink bra and panties she’d worn under tight jeans made him want her all over again.

  He reached for her, and when she sighed in her sleep, he couldn’t resist taking yet another taste of her soft skin. Trailing his lips over her shoulder, he nudged the sheet down to draw her nipple into his mouth.

  She awoke with a shudder and a moan. “Again?” she whispered.

  “Again.”

  “I have to go to work,” Colin said much later when his yearning for her had been satisfied—for now.

  “Lucky me, I’m on vacation this week.”

  “Vacation,” he said with a sigh. “What’s that?”

  “You work too hard.”

  “We were careless, Meredith. What if you’re pregnant?”

  She shrugged. “Then we’ll have a baby whose mommy and daddy love each other and who’ll love him or her.”

  “And does Mommy love Daddy?” he asked, his heart hammering.

  She nodded. “I do love you, Colin. I realized that about five minutes after you left the night we had dinner here.”

  He hugged her tightly. “Thank you,” he said, his voice gruff with emotion, “for taking a chance on us, and for the most amazing night of my life. This is just the beginning. I hope you know that.”

  “What color hair do you think our baby would have?” She played with a lock of his strawberry blond hair. “Your hair is so fair, and mine’s so dark.”

  “I want a little person who looks just like his or her mother.” He captured her lips in what he had intended to be a quick kiss. “I need to call the office,” he said when he finally resurfaced. “I think I’m going to be late.”

  She laughed and let him up to go find his cell phone. “Where was it?” she asked when he came back.

  “In my coat pocket on the kitchen floor next to your jeans.” He brought his hand from behind his back and dangled the pink bra and panties from his finger. “This,” he said, smiling as he held up the bra, “was decorating the banister. And these very sexy pink panties were halfway up the stairs.”

  Her cheeks burned with embarrassment.

  “God, I love that.” He sat on the bed to trace a finger over her blush.

  “I hate it.”

  “You can’t hate it. It totally turns me on. Speaking of turning things on…” He made a face and powered up his cell phone. It went crazy beeping with messages. “Shit,” he groaned as he listened to one irate message after another from Declan. When the last one ended with, “Where the fuck are you?” Colin groaned. “I’m sorry. I have to handle this. Why don’t you go back to sleep for a while?”

  “Do you have to go?”

  “Not yet,” he said, pulling the covers up around her and kissing her.

  He found his jeans in the hallway outside her room and tugged them on before he went downstairs to call Declan.

  “Jesus Christ, Colin, where the hell have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you all night.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “This sewer main thing is huge. I had to call everyone in.”

  “Shit,” Colin muttered.

  “You said it. Shit everywhere. I could use some help here.”

  Looking up the stairs to where Meredith slept naked in the bed where they’d made love all night long, Colin made a decision. For once, just this once, it was going to be all about him—and her. “I’m taking this week off. I need a vacation.”

  “Are you out of your fucking mind? Did you hear what I just said? We’ve got a crisis going on here. You can’t just dump it on me.”

  “Here’s what I want you to do—call Da and Brandon and get them over there to help you and Tommy. Sewer stuff is Brandon’s forte anyway.”

  “He’s off somewhere with Daphne. He won’t want to come in.”

  “They have to pick up Mike at Erin’s at some point today, so he’ll be around. It’s time to get him back in the fold. He’s done his sentence in Siberia.”

  “What the hell’s gotten into you, man? It isn’t like you to blow off work.”

  “Tell Brandon things clicked for me. He’ll know what I mean, and he can fill you in. In the meantime, you’re in charge for the next week. If you hit a bump, call Da. I haven’t taken a vacation in six years. I need a break, Dec.”

  “Yeah, well, your timing sucks.”

  “I’m sorry, but you’ll be fine. I’ve got to go.”

  Declan was still grumbling when Colin ended the call. He wanted to jump around with delight. A whole week to spend with Meredith! Scrolling through his phone numbers, he found his friend Tony Peluzo.

  “Hey, Colin,” Tony said when he answered the phone at Tony’s Travel. “Nice to hear from you. What’s up?”

  “I need a favor.” Colin knew he didn’t have to remind Tony of the deal he’d given him on the driveway O’Malley & Sons put in at his house last year. “I want to be somewhere warm by tonight. Two people, first class all the way. What can you do?”

  “That’s a tall order. It’s April vacation week, and things are pretty well sold out.”

  “Come on, there’s got to be something.”

  “Let me see what I can do, and I’ll call you back.”

  “Thanks, Tony.” Colin sprinted up the stairs and got back in bed with Meredith.

  “I thought you had to go to work,” she mumbled when he snuggled up to her.

  “I took the week off.”

  One big brown eye opened and then the other. “You did?”

  “Yep, and my brother’s rip-shit pissed at me,” Colin said with a big giddy grin.

  “A whole week,” she sighed.

  “Is that okay?” he asked, suddenly worried that he was rushing things.

  “It’s more than okay.” She drew him into a wanton, carnal kiss that made his head spin.

  “I need a whole week to recover from last night. I’m glad we’re taking it slow.”

  Blushing, she laughed, and his heart skipped a crazy beat.

  His phone rang, and he tugged it out of his pants pocket. “Hi, Tony. What’s the verdict?” Colin listened for a minute. “Hang on a sec.” He held the phone to the side and looked at Meredith. “What’s your pleasure? Jamaica or Grand Cayman?”

  Her eyes widened, and then she gasped.

  “Well, what’s it going to be?”

  “Grand Cayman.” She threw her arms around him. “Definitely Grand Cayman.”

  Chapter 29, Day 79

  The crews from O’Malley & Sons spent five full days repairing the broken sewer main and fixing the weaknesses Brandon discovered when he inspected the area around the break. His coworkers warmly welcomed him back, even Simms and Lewis, who accepted his apology for the near miss with the gravel. Brandon had been delighted to hear from Declan that things had clicked for Colin. When he connected the dots for Dec, his younger brother’s attitude toward Colin softened but only a little. Brandon agreed that Colin had picked a hell of a time to finally click with Meredith.

  At some point during that long week in the trenches, Brandon came to a decision—he didn’t want to do this anymore. As challenging as it had been to put his education and experience to work to fix the sewer main, he could no longer pretend the job was satisfying or rewarding. He had something else in mind, but he wanted to talk it over with Daphne before he did anything about it. If she agreed with his plan, he’d also have to run it by his partners. He was prepared to leave the company if it came to that, but he hoped it wouldn’t.

  He came home Friday night filthy and exhausted, but he rushed upstairs because he couldn’t wait to see his girls. He’d all but moved in with them over the last week.

  Mike came running to him the way she did every night, but Brandon held her at ar
m’s length. “I’m gross, squirt. Let me take a shower, okay?”