Beneath her guilt with herself and her frustration with her sister and renewed worry about how they would be able to make a life here in Pine Gulch once Gabi’s latest deception became common knowledge, Becca was aware of an aching sadness for what she had lost.
She might have told herself she couldn’t allow a relationship with Trace, but some part of her still yearned. This was a firm reminder that they could never be more than casual friends. He was a sworn officer of the law and she came from a long line of felons and thieves. The smartest thing to do now would be to cling tightly to whatever hard-fought distance she could find, no matter how much it hurt.
Chapter Nine
Though she had been tempted to wake Gabi as soon as Trace drove away through the December night, Becca forced herself to wait until the morning. Their confrontation would come soon enough. Better to wait until she had a cooler head and a calmer heart.
Instead, she endured a mostly sleepless night, worrying about her sister and about how she was going to teach right and wrong—moral choice and accountability—to a girl who had spent nine years watching her mother take what she wanted regardless of the consequences to anyone around her.
She grabbed only a few hours of sleep and woke gritty-eyed, with an aching sadness trickling through her.
Used to fending for herself from all those years with Monica, Gabi always woke to her own alarm clock. She was dressed and sitting at the small table in the dingy kitchen with her cereal bowl when Becca finished showering and pulling her hair into her customary ponytail.
“Morning.” Gabi smiled at her, much more at ease than she’d seemed all weekend. The irony didn’t escape Becca. She reminded herself that somewhere inside Gabi was as sweetly innocent as any other nine-year-old girl, she just needed more help and guidance now than most, as difficult as it might seem.
She drew in a deep breath. Now that the moment had come, she didn’t know where to start. Better to just plunge right in, she decided, like that first moment of walking outside into the frigid air.
“I had a late-night visit from the police chief last night. Gabi, we need to talk.”
Gabi froze, the spoon still in her mouth. Alarm flickered in her eyes but it was quickly concealed. She pulled the spoon out and returned it to the bowl before she spoke.
“Those girls gave me that stuff. I didn’t do anything. I was going to give it back today, I swear.”
She closed her eyes, her worst fears confirmed. The girls in her class thought she was dying of a heart condition and Gabi was certainly smart enough to work the situation to her advantage.
“What stuff?”
Gabi pressed her lips together as if she wanted to call her words back. After a long pause, she reached into her backpack and withdrew a handful of items, then spread them on the breakfast table. An iPod Touch, a handheld game system, a slim silver cell phone. What fourth-grader had a cell phone? Becca wondered. Probably most of them.
“You told them you’re sick, didn’t you? That you have a bad heart. That’s why the girls in your class gave you those things.”
To her credit, Gabi looked genuinely upset. Her face crumpled and a tear leaked from one eye. Either she truly regretted her actions or Monica had a serious contender for the most deceptive Parsons female. “I didn’t mean for … for all this to happen, Becca. I swear, I didn’t mean it.”
“Why would you lie about something so terrible?”
“At first it was just a joke, you know?”
“No. I don’t understand this at all. Explain how you could joke about having a serious heart condition.”
“I didn’t want to go to P.E. one day. We were doing that stupid crab soccer that I hate and I can’t do. So I told one of the girls I had a heart problem and she helped me get out of class.”
“Why didn’t you just say you hated crab soccer?”
“I don’t know. It was stupid. I felt bad about it right after and was going to tell her the truth, but …” Her voice trailed off and she looked truly miserable.
“What?”
“They were all so nice to me afterward, you know? Writing me notes, bringing me lunch, watching out for me on the playground.” She looked down at the table. “I didn’t want to be here and thought school was stupid. But after I lied about being sick, I felt, I don’t know, important, I guess. They were even talking about having a benefit for me. I thought it was cool.”
“And then the girls started giving you iPods and cell phones and talking about going without Christmas presents so they could give you the money instead?” She used her hard, sharp attorney’s voice and Gabi looked up, startled and guilty.
“I didn’t ask for any of that stuff, I swear! They all just gave it to me. I think they thought it would make me feel better or something. I was going to give it back and tell them you wouldn’t let me keep it.”
“But you weren’t going to tell them you were lying.”
Her sister’s silence was answer enough and her frustration overwhelmed her. “For heaven’s sake, Gabi. Pine Gulch is our home now. We’re not going anywhere. Haven’t you figured that out? These are neighbors and friends, not marks who are so stupid they deserve to be conned. People you can grift and then never see again. I can’t believe Monica never explained the difference of that to you. What are those girls going to think now when they find out it’s not true, that you don’t have a heart condition and you’re not dying?”
She could see by the shock on Gabi’s features that the thought had never occurred to her. And why would it? She and Monica had never lived more than a few months at a time anywhere, always moving on to the next city, the next job. Her poor sister had never had a normal life. As far as Becca knew, she’d probably never had a real friend who lasted more than a few weeks. Of course she wouldn’t have her focus on the long-term implications.
Her sister’s words confirmed the assumption. “They won’t want to be my friends now, will they?”
Oh, darn. She wanted to step in and fix this for her sister but she knew this was one of those problems Gabi simply had to deal with on her own. How could Becca undo a lifetime of her mother’s example and help Gabi see she could find a better way of life than using other people for her own advantage?
The only thing that gave her hope was the knowledge that she had grown up under the exact same circumstances and somehow came out the other side with this sometimes inconvenient moral compass she couldn’t shake.
“It’s going to take some work. Put yourself in their position. You lied to them. They won’t like thinking you made a fool of them. Now you’re going to have to be honest—tell them what you told me, about wanting them to like you. Believe it or not, honesty can take you a lot further than lies and deception.”
Judging by her skeptical expression, Gabi didn’t look as if she were buying that particular concept. Becca couldn’t really blame her.
Gabrielle was quiet all the way to the diner. She tried rather halfheartedly to convince Becca she didn’t feel well, still feeling sick from Friday, and thought she should stay home one more day.
Becca only raised her eyebrow and stared down her sister, and after a moment Gabi mumbled something about how she would probably feel better once she was at school. When they arrived, she slid into her favorite booth looking out over Main Street and propped her book open in front of her.
As Becca waited on customers, she tried to keep a careful eye on her sister. She was fairly positive she didn’t see Gabi turn the page one single time. Still, Gabi barely looked up even when Becca set a hot chocolate topped with fluffy whipped cream in front of her.
A little remorse could go a long way, she reminded herself as she waited on The Gulch regulars. Gabi needed to suffer a little for what she’d done to deceive her friends. Pain was a harsh but effective teacher.
The regulars had been joined by one of their occasional members, the mayor of Pine Gulch, Quinn Montgomery, a distinguished-looking man in his sixties with a teasing glint in his eyes.
She passed out their orders, ending with the mayor. “Here you go, sir. Egg-white omelet with extra green peppers, just the way you like.”
“Thank you, my dear.” He gave her a warm smile. “I don’t know how you keep straight what everyone prefers.”
She returned his smile as she refilled coffee at the table. “My steel-trap mind, Mayor. It serves me well.”
He laughed out loud at that. “Where can I get one of those? My Marjorie is always telling me I’d forget my head if it wasn’t screwed on.”
Becca smiled and moved on to the next table, feeling slightly better than she had since she woke up.
She might trip over her feet and struggle to pour a simple cup of coffee without spilling it all over the customer and herself, but Becca had been given the gift of a keen memory. She never would have survived law school that first terrible year without it.
She sometimes suspected her excellent memory for customer names and preferences might be the only reason Lou and Donna hadn’t fired her after the first week for gross incompetence. She was not cut out to be a waitress, though she wanted to believe she was no longer a complete disaster.
A couple of construction workers next to the regulars’ booth were just giving her their orders when the door to the diner opened and the chief of police walked in wearing khakis and his Pine Gulch P.D. parka, looking dark and masculine. Her heartbeat skittered and she shifted her body so she was turned away from the door, reluctant to face him after the awkwardness of the night before.
“Did you catch that?”
She looked down at the construction worker with a bushy beard that had taken over his face. So much for her memory. With Trace Bowman around, she forgot completely where she was and what she was doing. “I’m sorry. Can you repeat that?”
With a frustrated sigh, he gave her his order again, making sure she wrote it down dutifully this time. When she finished, she turned to head toward the kitchen to place the order with Lou and discovered Trace had stopped to talk to the mayor and the other regulars, which meant she had no choice but to walk right past him.
She might have expected him to gaze at her with wariness or even disdain after basically finding out her sister was running a con on the whole elementary school. Instead, he greeted her with a smile that felt very much like a warm kiss on the cheek.
“Thanks for meeting me here,” she heard the mayor say as she moved past. “We’ve got to figure out what we can do about that pesky intersection once and for all. Three fender-benders there in two weeks are three too many. Becca, you mind if we take an empty booth?”
She turned back. “Um, no. Of course not. Take whichever table you’d like.”
“Can you give me a minute first, Mayor?” Trace asked. “I see someone I need to have a word with.”
“No problem. Do what you need to do.”
Becca expected Trace to go talk to one of the other patrons. Instead, he headed toward the booth in the corner where Gabi sat pretending to read, the whipped cream now dissolved into her untouched hot chocolate.
Oh, she wished she had a customer nearby who needed something. She was consumed with curiosity and no small amount of dread. Would he lecture Gabi, chide her for lying? She wouldn’t be able to hear them over the noise of clinking glasses and the hum of conversation in the diner.
She could see Gabi’s reaction, however. Her sister’s expression as she saw the chief of police headed toward her was painful to see, a mix of fear and embarrassment. Trace said something to her, and to her shock Becca watched a small smile blossom on her sister’s features, the first one she’d seen all morning.
They talked for a moment longer and then Gabi actually laughed. Becca couldn’t hear the sound of it from her position but she could see her sister’s genuine smile, the way her eyes lit up as some of the fine-wrought tension seeped out of her.
In that instant as she gazed at the two of them, something hard and tight seemed to dislodge around her heart and crumble to pieces. The noises of the diner seemed to fade and she couldn’t breathe suddenly as the shocking realization thundered through her.
She was falling for Trace Bowman, this man who took time out of his hectic schedule and left the mayor himself waiting so that he could cajole a smile and a laugh from a frightened young girl.
Oh, she was an idiot. He was a police officer. The chief of police, for heaven’s sake. If he knew who she was, what she came from, he would want nothing to do with her. How could she have been so very foolish? She should have taken better care to keep him at a distance.
From the moment she had met him here at The Gulch, she should have done everything she could to discourage his attempts at friendship.
She knew what was at stake here. As she had told her sister just that morning, Pine Gulch was their home now. They had nowhere else to go. She was trying to be admitted into the bar, to open her own law practice.
Only an ill bird fouls its own nest. Her nest was well and truly fouled. Disastrously messed up. How would she be able to live here, make a life with Gabi, when she was foolishly falling in love with the chief of police?
“Hey, Becca, you mind topping me off?” Jesse Redbear gave her his toothless smile. The sounds of the diner filtered back through her head and she realized she was standing stupidly in the middle of the floor gazing into space with the pot of regular in her hand.
She forced herself to move forward. Out of somewhere deep inside, she manufactured a smile. “Here you go. Sorry about that.”
“Everything okay, hon? You look kind of pale.” Sal Martinez gave her a worried look.
“I’m fine. Just fine.” She shoved this latest disaster into the compartment in her head labeled “later” and pasted on what she hoped was a charming smile. “I can’t believe it’s snowing again. Doesn’t it ever stop around here?”
“Sure,” Jess said with his wheezy two-pack-a-day laugh. “We hardly ever have snow in July and August.”
“Something to look forward to, then,” she answered, then moved away. She would worry about Trace Bowman and her very inconvenient feelings for him later. For now, she had a shift to finish, responsibilities to meet.
A nest to protect.
As he sat down with the mayor and listened while Quinn outlined the complaints he’d received about the intersection of Aspen Grove and Skyline Road, Trace couldn’t seem to keep himself from watching Becca out of the corner of his gaze.
He found everything about her fascinating, from how she tucked her hair behind her ear, to the way she nibbled on the end of her pencil as she took orders, to the little wrist flip she did as she delivered a customer’s order.
He wasn’t the only one drawn to her. Because of her quiet dignity and warmth, people just seemed to want to be around her. The old coots who were The Gulch regulars were completely enamored. They flirted and joked and teased. She didn’t appear to mind. She flirted right back with them. He imagined just the tips from the breakfast regulars would go far to help her with her budgetary needs.
Soon she made her way through the dining room toward the open table Quinn had found near the hall leading to the bathroom, though she still seemed to be avoiding his gaze.
“Mayor, would you like more coffee?”
“I’m good, thanks.”
Finally she met his gaze and he saw wariness there and something else, something that looked like barely veiled panic.
“Chief Bowman, are you ready to order?” she asked, pulling out her notebook and pencil.
The idea of her in a position of servitude bothered him for reasons he couldn’t have explained, but he didn’t have a choice in this situation. “I’m going to have to go with what works. I’ll have my usual. Western omelet and a stack.”
“A man who knows what he wants.”
“I’m beginning to,” he murmured.
Her eyes widened and she stared at him for a long moment. Currents zinged between them and he couldn’t believe everybody else in the diner didn’t notice. Finally she wrenched h
er gaze away and nearly stumbled in her haste to escape their table and head toward Lou and the grill to give his order.
“In the short-term, we need a four-way stop there at the minimum, wouldn’t you agree?” the mayor said.
Trace turned his attention back to the conversation and responded appropriately, though half his mind was still occupied with Becca and Gabi. A few moments later, he saw her glance at her watch and then head to the girl’s table, probably to remind her it was time for school.
Gabi’s face was all puckered and tight like she wanted to cry. Poor kid. He didn’t blame her for not wanting to go to school. When he had spoken with her earlier, he had mainly intended only to tell her he was relieved she wasn’t dying, but the moment she saw him, Gabi had looked even more miserable, if possible. Her features had dissolved into distress and she had stammered out an explanation about wanting to get out of P.E. and the story exploding beyond her control. She was visibly upset and had even apologized to him for her deception, when he had merely been a bystander in the whole situation.
He hadn’t lectured her. Instead, he had told her about the time he and his twin brother had tried to deceive their teachers by trading places in school and he’d learned later his brother had only come up with the idea so he could get out of three tests he had that day. What had started as a funny joke had turned into the worst day of his young life.
The poor girl had laughed at the story but she was still quite obviously very sorry for what she had done. He’d also given her the benefit of his life experience by telling her things that seem impossible to face are never as hard as they appear. Like yanking a bandage, it was usually better to do it fast and get it over with.
She wouldn’t have an easy time of it in school that day but she would get through it.
On some level, he could relate. He knew what it was to regret something with every breath, to wonder how he could ever face the people he had wronged. After his parents’ murders, he had expected Caidy and his brothers to hate him for his unwitting part. If he hadn’t been so self-absorbed with Lilah Bodine, he would have been at the ranch with his parents. He didn’t know if he could have stopped the home invasion robbery but he might have been able to use the negotiation skills he’d gained as an MP to keep the situation from exploding as it had done.
Christmas in Cold Creek Page 11
