My breathing sped. I felt vulnerable, naked, alone with my emotions, fears splayed out before him. I could trust him not to take advantage of my outfit—or lack thereof—but could I trust him with this?
“For a friend?” he asked. He wanted to know what this meant, that we both understood this moment stayed here, in the Texas trees, far away from everything that had broken me.
I nodded.
Slowly, his face came closer, and I kept my eyes open until his lips touched mine. Wet, warm, sure. I didn’t know what I’d been expecting, but this wasn’t it. For Rhett to kiss me so tenderly, for his hand to wrap around my neck, for him to pull away slowly, but hold my gaze.
He dipped his head forward and pressed his lips to my forehead. “You’ll get through this.”
Only part of me believed him.
Chapter Thirty-One
That night, I got my first message from Andrew since the fallout from my birthday. My heart leapt as I went to read it.
Andrew: Hey
That was it? We were back to the “hey” stage?
Three dots popped up on the screen, and I let out a sigh of relief. It was challenged by the fear mounting in my chest. What would he say?
Andrew: I miss you.
My heart melted.
Me: I miss you too. So much.
Andrew: Are you okay? I got your voicemail.
I sighed.
Me: Things have been rough around here.
Andrew: I’m sorry.
Me: It’s my fault.
Andrew: How’s Liz?
My eyes stung.
Me: I don’t know. I haven’t heard from her.
Andrew: That sucks.
Me: Yeah.
Andrew: I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you.
I put my hand over my mouth to keep my lips from trembling.
Me: I’m just glad we’re talking now.
Andrew: We missed you guys at the last chili cook-off.
Me: Me too. Did your family win?
Andrew: Yeah. But the competition was terrible.
Me: Apparently they don’t bean business.
Andrew: Or love chili.
Me: But I do.
Andrew: From my head tomatoes.
Me: :)
And we were back, but not quite, because so much more hung between us than one little lie.
Andrew: Why didn’t you trust me? You know I could have kept a secret.
Me: It’s hard for me to trust anyone.
Andrew: But how can we have a relationship without trust?
Me: I was wrong. I still had a lot of hang-ups over my family and that time when my mom broke my phone.
Andrew: But you don’t anymore?
Me: No. I trust you.
Andrew: How am I supposed to know that? When the rubber hits the road, will things be different, or will something like this just happen again?
Me: You’ll just have to trust me to see.
Andrew: I don’t know if I can yet. I think I still need some time.
My heart broke, more fully than ever before, because now he didn’t have the one thing he wanted from me. Trust. And I had no idea how to earn it back.
After a long night of restless sleep, of waking up to reread Andrew’s messages, my alarm went off. I stumbled to the bathroom, did my hair, rubbed some sunscreen on my face and shoulders, and went to the kitchen for coffee.
The pot was already on.
I looked around and saw Dad on the couch, lacing up his work boots.
“Morning,” I said.
He looked over at me. “Morning.”
“Got a job?”
He nodded. “With you.”
“What?”
“Howard wants some cement poured at the feedlot, so technically I’m going to help Branch.”
“Oh.”
“But I can drive you in.”
“Okay.” I sent Rhett a text, poured myself some coffee with sugar, and got in the pickup with Dad.
We rode to the Lanes’ in awkward silence. Usually, I’d try to at least start a little conversation, but after our talk, I couldn’t. No one in my life seemed to trust me. I tried to remind myself I only had a year of this left, but now that fact didn’t seem so helpful. Even if I did get scholarships, who knew if I’d even have enough money to actually get myself there.
Dad dropped me off at the shop where Rhett and Harleigh were waiting and then drove down the path to the feed yard. I could see Branch’s cement truck spinning in the distance.
Rhett met my eyes and smiled. I checked for a hint of awkwardness, but it was just like any other morning. We both knew what that kiss meant, but now, it was even clearer. We were just friends, co-workers.
The three of us got in the truck and drove out to another pasture to fix fence. Having Harleigh there helped keep conversation light.
We spent the day working, and when we got back to the house, Rhett invited me in to supper. Dad, Branch, and Howard were already at the table with Deena.
She’d fixed baked beans, ham, and cornbread, one of the many meals she was so good at cooking. We all gathered around the table and tucked into platefuls of delicious food.
Toward the end of supper, Howard said, “Skye, I heard you need a vehicle.” He looked pointedly at Rhett, who’d been driving me back and forth to work for a week and a half.
I glanced at Dad but couldn’t read his expression. “That’s right.”
“I didn’t want to offer until I’d gotten your dad’s permission, but we’re looking to get Deena a new car. Would you be interested in buying her old one? It’s got about eighty thousand miles on it, but it runs great. Gets nearly thirty miles to the gallon.”
Deena drove a boat car that was probably super luxurious when it was new. Now, it was perfect for driving down country roads while still saving on gas.
I acted like I was focusing on my meal, but really, I just wanted to hide my disappointment. “I’d love to, but I can’t afford it.”
“Well,” Howard said. I lifted my gaze to see him looking at Dad. “We talked it out. You wouldn’t have a payment, but we’d want you to work for us two days a month for the rest of the school year. You’d get half a day’s pay, and the other half would go toward the car.”
Dad nodded. “You can use your extra earnings to pay for your insurance and gas.”
My eyes went wide as I took in what they were saying. “You mean, I’m buying a car?”
Howard’s mustache lifted over his smile. “If you want to.”
I nodded, and before thinking, I hugged Dad. He froze under my touch, but eventually lifted his hand to touch my forearm.
“Thank you,” I said, not ready to let go yet.
“You did it yourself.”
And part of me was proud, but a lot of me felt sad at how true that statement was.
I drove the car home, and when we got there, I offered to give Mom a ride. She acted mad because I’d gotten a new car.
So, I retreated to my room.
One step forward, two steps back.
I pulled out my tablet and went back to Facebook, searching for anything that could distract me from my mom, who only left her room for work, and my dad, who’d spoken more frankly when drunk than ever before.
His words echoed in my mind. I’ll never forgive you for taking her away from me. Never.
And then I came across Dorian’s post. A picture of his guitar with that black and white sonogram photo on top. And then a picture of him and Liz, a smile wider than I’d ever seen on her face. I’m going to be a father. I can’t wait to raise my little Chili Bean with the woman who sets my world on fire. To the person who made this possible, I owe you my life. Thank you. To the ends of the earth, thank you.
Chapter Thirty-Two
The next morning, Dad went with me to the courthouse to get the car title in my name and new tags. The Lanes gave me my paycheck a few days early so I could cover it. Then we went to the insurance agent and set up an account so I could pay them directl
y. Fifty dollars a month since I was on my parents’ insurance. It didn’t sound like much, but added to my cell phone bill, my expenses were piling up. I’d have to be extra frugal to make sure I had enough for gas and a little extra savings.
Still, as I drove the boat to the Lanes’ ranch, I couldn’t help but smile. I ran my thumbs over the steering wheel. This car was mine. Something I could call my own. The Lanes had done so much for me, I should have been paying them for more than the car.
For the next eight hours, I worked harder than I had before, just to show how grateful I was. I didn’t want this vehicle to be something done out of pity—I wanted to earn it. I wanted to earn everything that came my way, including Andrew’s trust.
I knew it wouldn’t come easily, but I was ready to work for it. Andrew had believed in me, before he even knew the depth of my family, and even after he’d gotten a glimpse into the chaos. He gave my parents a hobby, and he gave my family the happiest month we’d ever had together. No matter how bad things were now, I’d never forget that.
But figuring out how to win him back was a lot easier than simply wanting to do it. I thought about it day in and day out, searched online for ideas, which ranged from decent to ridiculous, and I even asked Rhett for advice. He reminded me he wasn’t the best person to ask for help in the relationship department.
This was something I’d have to solve on my own. And since my parents weren’t talking to me and I had to drive myself all the way to Austin for my doctor’s appointment, I had a lot of time to think.
It seemed like all I did was wait. Wait for my appointment, wait to get checked in, wait for Dr. Pike. But finally, he walked in.
“How’s Skye?” he asked.
I smiled. For the first time in a while, I could honestly say, “I’m alright.”
We dove into a conversation about running and stretches and volleyball, and then he took me to the physical therapy room to watch me run, have me lift weights, and go through a series of stress tests.
At the end, I was sweating, and he was grinning.
He gave me a high-five. “You are a rock star.”
I looked at him incredulously. “What?”
“I have grown men and women who don’t do what you’ve done.” He put his hands on my shoulders. “You were given a path to recovery, and you listened, you trusted me, and now, you’re ready to play volleyball again.”
My lips parted. “What?”
He nodded. “You’re ready.”
I bent over and rested my hand on my knees. My left one with a long surgery scar and my right one with scars of other kinds—floor burns, scratches. My chest ached with invisible scars that were finally starting to fade. And I cried, right in front of Dr. Pike.
He rubbed my back, and I wiped at my eyes
“I’m so sorry,” I said. “It’s just…really? I’m cleared?”
Grinning wide, he nodded. “Just wear your brace. And keep up the stretches. It’s time for you to get back to doing what you love.”
He had me schedule another appointment a month out, just to check in and make sure everything was still going well, and then I walked out of the hospital to my car. On the way, I thought back over the year—learning I’d been appointed libero, the crying-in-front-of-the-entire-team scene with Shelby, tearing my ACL, meeting Andrew for the first time, kissing Andrew for the first time, turning Kellum down for prom… I’d come so far from the girl who’d raised her hand and asked to be libero that day. I hardly recognized her anymore.
I got into my car and started it up. I pulled my phone out of my purse to call someone and tell them the news. My fingers hovered over the screen. There was only one person I wanted to talk to.
Taking in a deep breath, I typed out his number, just like muscle memory.
It rang three times, and he answered. “Hello?”
I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the headrest. His voice was heaven. “Hey.”
“What’s up?” In the background, I could hear a mower running. He must have been at work.
With my eyes still closed, I bit down on my thumbnail. “I got released to play volleyball.”
“What?”
“I got released!”
“No, I understood, but that’s awesome! So you’re good for practice and games and everything?”
Grinning, I said, “Yes!”
“That’s so great, Skye! I’m happy for you.” The smile in his voice played through the phone speaker and went straight to my heart.
“Want to celebrate with me?”
The mower in the background stopped, and I heard yelling. Andrew said something back about getting off the phone soon. “Sorry, what, Skye?”
“I was wondering if you’d want to hang out? I’m driving through Woodman on my way back home.”
“I’d love to. I can take my lunch break when you get to town.”
My smile grew even wider. “See you then.”
“See you then.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Andrew gave me directions to a small café on the outskirts of town. On the outside, it didn’t look like much—faded paint, rock parking lot, a few pickups sitting outside. But I saw Andrew’s car right up front, and that made the place worth gold.
I parked my car next to his and then walked inside. He waited in a booth, a menu in front of his face.
With my heart beating like hummingbird wings, I stepped closer. “Andrew?”
He laid the menu down and met my eyes, his face lighting up into a huge sunshine smile. Even with a smudge of dirt on his temple, he looked amazing. My heart must have been beating in anticipation for this, because all the blood in my body went to my head.
“It’s great to see you,” he said.
I’d hoped he’d stand up to give me a hug—something—but he stayed seated. I slid into the booth across from him. “You too.”
“Let me see the knee,” he said.
I stuck my leg out the side of the booth so he could examine the fading scar on my left leg. He reached out and brushed his thumb over the puckered skin. His eyes met mine, and he smiled again. “You’re whole again.”
My smile faltered. Not quite. “How’s work going?”
His white T-shirt had grass stains on it—however that happened—and from the grit on his face, he’d been working hard.
“It’s fine,” he said. “You know, not my dream job or anything, but I’m lucky to have it.”
“Did your mom ever find a job?”
He nodded. “Yeah, she’s going to be one of the secretaries at the school. It doesn’t pay as much, but we’ll be able to save some money carpooling. And it has great benefits.”
The waitress came and took my order. Water and a chicken salad. I really needed to start getting in shape for volleyball.
“What kind of benefits?” I asked.
As he spoke, I realized how grown-up this all felt. Talking about work and pay and compromises. Because that’s what life was. I might want to fly, but I couldn’t spread my wings without knowing where the ground was first.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked.
I rested my chin on my hand. “Compromises.”
“And?” He took a long drink from his tea until it almost looked like water blended in with all the ice.
“Relationships aren’t perfect.”
Lines formed across his forehead. “Yeah.”
I might have been on the edge of some great understanding, but I wanted to think on it longer. I didn’t want to ruin this moment, of Andrew and me just sitting, talking, like friends. It felt nice.
“So,” I said. “That’s it. How are Agents Spotty and Big Bird doing?”
He laughed. “Big Bird’s a little peckish.”
I rolled my eyes but laughed all the same. “And Spotty?”
“Well, would you believe it, he’s come down with a case of the chicken pox?”
“No way.”
“Really.” Andrew nodded. “He said it was a self-fu
lfilling prophecy because of the whole spotty thing. Also that he’s never helping me again.”
I laughed, and when I’d calmed a little bit, I stuck my lip out. “So no more clandestine thrift store date operations?”
I realized I’d said clandestine and was ready to explain what the word meant, but Andrew laughed. “Maybe not clandestine anymore. At least, not with Spotty picking you up.”
He understood? I fought a dopey smile that hit my lips, that made my heart melt into a puddle in the pit of my stomach. Failing, I twirled my straw around my drink, stirring the ice. “I think I can handle that.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
When I got home, neither Mom nor Dad were back from work. Some of the house had been messed up again since my cleaning spree, so I wiped down the countertops, did the dishes, and I turned the sprinkler on the grass. After that, I went about making supper.
Dad came home first, slipped his boots off, and walked into the kitchen. “What’re you cooking?”
I held up the glass pan with frozen tater tots carefully lined on top. “Tater tot casserole.”
His lips turned up. “Green beans too?”
“I can,” I said.
“Looking forward to it.” He continued onto the bathroom. Dad always took a shower after work.
I smiled to myself. It still felt stiff, talking to him, but maybe we were working our way back to something that felt halfway normal. Whatever that was.
I turned on the oven and put the pan inside, then pulled a can of green beans from the pantry. I had them cooking on the stove with bacon grease when Mom came in.
She took one look at me, her face in a hard expression, and dropped her purse on the island. “What are you doing?”
Her harsh tone caught me off guard. “Cooking?”
“What are you making?”
“Tater tot casserole and green beans.”
Mom went to the pantry and slammed the door closed that I’d left open.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
Loving Skye: Book Three (The Texas Star Series 3) Page 12
