"Maybe we can arrange that. By the way, my name is Gavin. I'll call you later and let you know."
I got into the truck and started the engine. As amused as I was over what had just happened, I couldn't shake my anger with Claire. I'd waited all this time for something that apparently would never happen. It was time to drop the idea of Mrs. Gavin Price. Now the trick would be keeping our friendship together. I needed to talk to Tyler; she'd know what to do. I headed toward the Java Spot, hoping Claire wouldn't be there. With KC's right next door, she was there all the time. I was in the clear; her little red Cabrio was nowhere to be seen.
"Hey boys! The usual for my homie and a chocolate cupcake for the kiddo. What's wrong Gav? You've got serious anger face on right now. Who pissed in your lemonade?"
Ty had a way with words; she could always make me smile.
"There's that pretty boy smile I love to see!"
"Yeah, pretty boy my ass."
She handed me a large black coffee and a cupcake for Miles. She set him up at the table next to us with her IPod and some coloring things. "Hey buddy, I've gotta talk to Daddy about something. I want you to draw me a picture to hang on my wall, okay?"
"I'm done waiting for her, Ty. I can't do this to myself anymore. I've waited two years for her to realize it was okay to move on. The way we are together has felt like a real relationship minus the sex. I guess I just let myself believe it was more than what it really was."
"Dude, what the hell are you talking about?"
I looked at the screen saver on my phone. It was a picture of Claire and me on my birthday. She'd grabbed my phone and made me take a selfie with her. She was kissing my cheek and giving me bunny ears. It’s one of my favorite pictures of us.
"She crushed me today, and she doesn't even know it yet. I wanted to give her everything she deserves. I had it all planned out in my head—marriage, another baby, growing old together. How could I have been so stupid?"
"Are you blind? What makes you think she doesn't want that from you?"
"I was driving past Gala's today and I saw her having lunch with Cole. I watched him kiss her on the cheek while holding her hand. She didn't see me drive by so she doesn't know I saw them. Why would she go back to him?"
"I saw firsthand the shit he put her through; she'd never take him back. There has to be an explanation. She's in love with you, and it scares the shit out of her. She's only loved one man the way she loves you, and she lost him. She thinks if she tells you how she feels and you reject her, then she'd not only lose you, but she'd lose Miles, too. Don't give up on her. Tell her how you feel."
"I feel like beating the hell out of him for touching her. I feel gutted picturing the smile on her face as he kissed her. I'm done, Ty; I'm over it." I stood and refilled my cup. "I met someone today, and she wants to hang out tonight. Her kid is in Miles' class, and she basically threw herself at me. I'm thinking a good hard fuck will ease my frustration."
"You stupid son of a bitch! If you screw my best friend over like that, I'll kill you myself."
Miles tossed the iPod and ran to the door. "Mommy!" He jumped into her arms.
"Hey there, love bug. How was school?"
"Good! Daddy's gonna go play with Adam's mommy later. Can I come to your house instead of Grandma's?
Her face turned white as a ghost. She looked at me with total confusion then her eyes watered up. I wasn't sure why she'd care; she had Cole. She put Miles down, and he hopped back up to his crayons.
"So you have a play date, huh?"
"It's nothing serious. I just met her today."
"It's none of my business, Gavin, and quite frankly, I don't want to hear about it, so please feel free not to share." She looked at Miles with warm, loving eyes. "As for Miles, I'm the only mother he has so, if he wants to come with me while you get your dick wet, then he can. I'm leaving at six so make your play date for after that." She gave Tyler a sad smile and walked out, her lip quivering.
I called Sasha and made plans for seven.
"Tyler, tell me I'm not an asshole."
"All I'm going to say is that if you do this, you'll lose her. Ask her about Cole before you throw away your future. Happily ever after or easy pussy, you decide."
****
The hot water from the shower poured down my back as I leaned my head on the cool tile wall. I couldn't get that look of hers out of my head, the pain in her big blue eyes and her beautiful lips quivering. What had I done?
I pulled into Claire's driveway, and before I could get out of the truck, she was helping Miles out. She looked at me with puffy eyes; I could tell she'd been crying.
"Just let him sleep here, I'm sure you'll be out past his bedtime, and I'll be taking him to school anyway. Oh, tell your sneaky bitch date not to be fake with me again or she'll regret it."
"What are you talking about?"
"Ask her about the dog park. It doesn't matter anyway. Wrap your shit up though, she's too easy to chance it."
"Claire, just let me ask you something."
"Bye, Gavin. Miles is waiting."
And just like that, she was walking away. Why was she so pissed off? This wouldn't bother her if she were back with Cole. I just messed it all up because of a girl I don't give a shit about. I needed to think, so I drove around the neighborhood for a few minutes and eventually ended up in Claire's driveway again. I had to tell her everything and ask about Cole. I walked up the front porch steps and heard them talking through the screen.
"I don't want a new mommy; I want you. I know I can call you that, but I want you to be my real mommy, where you marry Daddy and live with us."
"Miles, it's not that easy. You'll understand when you get bigger. Daddy and I love each other very much, but it's different with us. He loves me like a best friend. I'm sure he's going to find someone who will love you very much, and you'll love her, too."
I could hear my son crying, and it was breaking my heart.
"Do you know what used to make my daughter feel better when she was sad? Music. I would play my guitar and sing to her. I haven't played my guitar in a very long time, but if you want me to, I'll play for you."
I can't believe I almost messed this up. She's my love, my son's protector, and I had to let her know how much I needed her.
"I'm going to play you a song that makes me think of your daddy, but it's got to be our secret."
I heard her take the guitar off the wall and call him to the floor with her. She strummed the guitar and began to sing. She had the voice of an angel.
I'm scared of falling; I'm scared of the pain
I'm scared of the rush that will course through my veins
With your skin on my skin, and your breath on my neck
If I had one wish, that's what I'd get
Someone please help me, I don't know what to do
I think that I've fallen, I've fallen for you
I think that I've fallen, I've fallen for you
I couldn't take it anymore. I rushed into the house and looked at Miles. "Go check on Calvin, buddy."
She dropped the guitar and backed up against the wall. I grabbed her beautiful face and leaned in to kiss her. Just as our lips were about to touch, she slapped me across the face...hard.
"What the hell, Claire?"
"Why are you even here? Where's Sasha?"
"I was on your porch the whole time, I never got her. I don't want her; I want you!"
"Do you have any idea what today is? You picked the day I needed you most to bail on me for some nasty little whore." She stormed away from me and sat on the couch. "Audrey would have been thirteen today. I should be throwing a big birthday party, and instead, I was putting flowers on her grave. The only time I feel at home is when I'm with you and Miles. I was going to ask you to stay with me tonight, but before I could, I was asked to babysit while you screwed someone else."
Her tears fell like rain.
"Claire I..."
"You hurt me, Gavin. I've been hurt by a man before, but
this was different. You broke my heart today. What bothers me the most is that I have no right to be mad at you; we aren't even together."
"I saw you and Cole at Gala's. I thought you were back with him. I was hurt and angry, and that girl threw herself at me. She didn't even know my name. I'm so sorry, please."
"Fuck you, Gavin. Cole was at the cemetery when I got there. We went to lunch and talked about our daughter. You know the things he did to me. Do you really think I'd go back to him? I have more self-respect than to go back to the man who beat and raped me, no matter how much he's changed. You should have gone and gotten your frustration fuck, because if you think you can sweep me off my feet like a white knight after this, then you're crazy."
"I'm sorry, Claire! Please..."
"Go home, Gavin; I need to be alone. You can drop Miles off in the morning."
CHAPTER 5
Claire
I woke up and had to force myself out of bed. I'd cried myself to sleep after Gavin left, and my eyes totally gave it away. There was no way I was getting my contacts in today, and between the swelling and dark circles, makeup was a must. I was sure I'd see Sasha this morning, and I wondered what she'd say.
Call me childish, but I just had to look at her Facebook page. The girl is a stripper. I actually competed with a pretty, young, sexual acrobat and won. I had to laugh at the situation a little. I decided to let my inner nerd take the lead. I'd show her the girl he fell for. I pulled out the Hulk outfit Gavin bought me: a short, faded denim skirt, a purple tank top with Hulk on it, and Hulk converse. The outfit matched the tattoos of Hulk and She Hulk I have on my calves. I also put on my glasses with the green frames. I glanced at my reflection in the full-length mirror and smiled. I looked perfect.
I heard the door open and the TV turn on; Gavin must have used his key. I had no idea what I was going to say to him, but I couldn't hide from him forever.
"Claire, are you coming down?"
I headed to the kitchen with my heart racing; I could feel the pounding in my ears. I walked in, and he looked me up and down, smiling.
"Cute outfit! Did your boyfriend buy it for you?" Stepping in front of me, he handed me an iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts. "Can I interest you in a peace offering? It's blueberry, your favorite!"
"You're going to need a lot more than an iced coffee to get back into my good graces, Mr. Price. My boyfriend didn't buy me this, my asshole best friend did."
"Well then, he has good taste. He's a lucky bastard, too. It's not too often you find a girl who's hot as hell and can school you in the world of body art and comic books!"
"Stop kissing my ass. I'm still mad at you Gavin."
He looked me in the eyes, and with his adorable dimples showing, he flashed his million-dollar smile. I was losing myself in those bright blue eyes when he pulled me in for a hug. No matter how hard I tried to stay mad, I was defenseless against his sweet smelling Old Spice. I melted right into him.
"I'm sorry, Claire. I really fucked up. Can we just pretend yesterday never happened? I can't handle you being mad at me."
"Yeah, last night was hell. Today is a new day, and you're going to be late for work."
"Small price to pay for getting my baby girl back. I thought I'd lost you for good. I'd die without you, Claire." He kissed my forehead and rubbed his nose against mine.
I smiled at him and grabbed his chin. "Sweeter than a thousand!" I grabbed my purse and the stuff I'd need for the day and opened the door. "Let's go, love bug!"
I pulled into the school parking lot, and sure enough, Sasha was there waiting. Her shorts gave new meaning to the word short, and her tank top was so low-cut she was nearly falling out of it. I walked Miles in, and she followed behind us with her son. Carrie, the teacher's aide, saw me and waved. She was a regular at KC's, and I'd seen her at a bunch of comic trade shows. She was a total Marvel junkie.
"Hi, Mrs. Price. I'm loving the outfit, but I have to admit, I'm more of a Thor girl myself. How's the comic book store working out?"
I saw Sasha roll her eyes at the Mrs. Price comment.
"I'm not Mrs. Price yet, but I'm hoping for the job one day. The store is going great; I basically took the two stores and converted them into a bigger one with a bar-sized divider through most of the length. They both have their own entrance so you only need to be in both parts if you want to. You should really come check it out. Also, I need help for the comic side, so if you know of anybody, have them stop by."
"I'll definitely come check it out, and I'll ask around my circle of nerds about the job."
Sasha was outside waiting for me when I walked out. I wanted to smack that smug look right off her face, but deciding to be the better person, I walked right past her and headed for the car. I saw the boys' teacher sitting in her car with the windows down, gathering her things for class.
"Cute outfit if you're a thirteen-year-old tomboy. You can tell Gavin I missed him last night. He can call me if he wants to reschedule since you two are just friends."
"Oh, thanks. Gavin bought it for me. He loves that I prefer to have my personality showing and my lady parts covered. He didn't get you last night because he doesn't go for little girls who throw themselves at strangers." I smiled, both amused and proud of myself for speaking up. "You practically begged him to sleep with you, and you didn't even know his name. Have a little self-respect, girl. Did you think he wouldn't tell me? That's cute. Trust me, there's no need to reschedule; I've got all his needs covered."
"Whatever, loser."
"Yup, this loser is off to run both of her businesses. Have a nice day darlin'; I think I hear your pole calling you."
I turned and waved at the teacher with a rush of satisfaction. I headed to the shop wondering where Gavin and I stood now that things were pretty much out in the open. All I knew was I was happy our first fight was over.
Tyler didn't even let me out of the car before she pounced on me. "He told me you kissed and made up, well, made up anyway. Did you really bitch smack him?"
"He deserved it. We're all good though, and I told off that little skank at the school. I'll give you details later. I have to get my portfolio together for Saturday. I'm stealing some coffee to fuel my fire."
Both girls were working, so I brought coffee for all three of us.
"Thanks, boss lady!" Tara took the coffee from my hands.
She was gorgeous. Her shoulder length hair was always two colors, her natural black with something vibrant underneath and highlighted in; this week it was purple. She had a small hoop over the middle of her bottom lip and a diamond stud in her nose. She had lost a lot of weight recently, yet oddly enough, her breasts stayed the same size; usually that's what women loose first. Her body was a complete work of art, and Kayleb had put most of it there. Not only had she been his best friend, she'd also worked for him. As soon as I reopened the shop, she came right back. A lot of the regulars were really happy about that, because once a person is comfortable with a tattoo artist, they don't want to change it up. I loved this girl; if she weren’t such a homebody, she would've been dubbed the fourth amigo.
"I'll take that!" Beth took her coffee and sat at her station.
Beth is a petite Italian girl with a black Mohawk and a New York accent. She seems intimidating at first, but she's really a quiet person—and a hell of a good artist. I've never spent time with her out of the shop, but Tara told me she's the drummer in a band.
I sat in the comic store surfing through pictures on my laptop from the Halloween party we threw last year that I could use. Devil's Night should be scary but fun at the same time so there were plenty that were fitting for the occasion. I had a few zombie pictures that were cool, a picture of a bunch of the guests dressed up and doing the "Thriller" dance, and picture of Tara tattooing a huge Frankenstein on someone's back. That picture was awesome. The angle of her face made it easy to see how into it she was. I could use these, but I needed something new, more dark and daring. Since that "Grey" book came out, BDSM had become the ne
w craze, and now it was everywhere. I had to admit I was intrigued by it as well. The thought of erotic, sexual pleasure that could come from things you dared to try, and the fear of not knowing how much further your body would allow you to go. As long as I made them tasteful, I could take a few of those: dark and erotic not trashy and pornographic. What I needed was a model; I needed Tara.
I ran to her station to catch her before she left. "I need you to do me a huge favor, doll face."
"What's that?"
Staring into her big, green, doe eyes, I fluttered my eyelashes at her. "Model for me, Tara. Please? For the gallery expo. I meet with the owner on Saturday to show her my pictures, and I have a few dirty ideas I'd like you to bring to life."
"What? Claire, I'm not a model."
"But you could be. You have the perfect look for the type of alternative, erotic beauty that I want. You'll be my visual submissive, I'll turn that innocence of yours into some ink-filled kink."
"You're crazy, but let's give it a try. I want copies of them though. Every girl needs a few sexy pics of herself somewhere along the line."
"How would you feel about being tied up? Let's take this into the back so we don't draw in an audience. Anyway, I can duct tape your ankles to the chair and use my scarf to tie your hands behind your back. The sexual desire is all in your face and body language; the camera just freezes your moment. What are you willing to take off for me? Are you feeling brave?"
"What is it they say? 'Go big or Go home'. "
"I'm not sure who 'they' are, but tell them I said thanks."
There she was, sitting spread-eagle on a wooden chair, her ankles secured to the legs of the chair with duct tape over her combat boots. Her wrists were tied behind her back with a sheer, black scarf. All she had on was a black lace thong, matching bra, and a garter belt with purple fishnet stockings. Her tattooed arms and the scorpion tattoo under and around her navel looked perfect. Her facial piercings just added to the sex appeal. I grabbed my camera and got to work, shooting different angles and setting up different poses for her. I could tell she was enjoying herself, so I didn't feel bad for asking her to do it in the first place.
ALIVE WITH YOU (Real Love series Book 1) Page 4