He never relied on anyone but himself...
But he needs her now!
Butterfly Harbor deputy Matt Knight wants two things: to date Lori Bradley and the chance to adopt Kyle, a troubled teen. Wounded in Afghanistan, Matt knows he can’t move forward anchored to the past. But once he regains the guarded hotel manager’s trust, will his need to protect those he loves cost him a future with this extraordinary woman?
All Lori wanted to do was wrap her own arms around him and never let go.
“I like how you’re always thinking,” he whispered and pressed his forehead against hers. “Smart girls are hot.”
Tears prickled the back of her eyes, tightened her throat. Why did he do this to her? Make her want the one thing she knew would only hurt her in the end? Why did he let her believe in something that could never be hers? “So are men in uniform,” she said before she could stop herself. “But you know what?” With more strength than she thought she possessed, she planted her hands flat on his chest and pushed herself away. “Friends don’t kiss friends like that.”
“No.” Matt caught one of her hands before she could pull free. “No, they don’t. But maybe I’m on my way to earning another chance at being something other than friends.”
Dear Reader,
Welcome back to Butterfly Harbor.
When I “met” Lori Bradley, she was one of those solid background characters I knew would pop up occasionally. So, thinking she’d be in the shadows, I made her a little like me. Okay, I made her a lot like me, which means this is probably the most personal book I’ve written to date. I think if you ask, a lot of authors will admit to putting bits of themselves into their characters or, if they don’t, they put other people they know into them. It’s the nature of the art. The fun part of the story was finding her “match.” Lori isn’t the only woman who falls for Matt Knight. I kinda did, too.
Matt Knight made his first appearance in The Bad Boy of Butterfly Harbor. Like Lori, he was really just supposed to be a one-scene walk-on, but when he arrived he was so much more. Burly, a touch of Southern good old boy and a former soldier who has seen more than his share of tragedy. He’s as honorable as they come, sometimes to a fault.
For me, this story proves you never realize who you truly are until you see yourself through someone else’s eyes. When someone else believes in you, challenges you, that’s when you become who you’re meant to be, which is precisely what Matt and Lori do.
I hope you enjoy their story, and the stories still to come. And yes, before you ask, Kendall will be getting her own story soon.
Anna J.
Always the Hero
Anna J. Stewart
Bestselling author Anna J. Stewart can’t remember a time she wasn’t making up stories. Raised in San Francisco, she quickly found her calling as a romance writer when she discovered the used bookstore in her neighborhood had an entire wall dedicated to the genre. Her favorites? Harlequins, of course. A generous owner had her refilling her bag of books every Saturday morning, and soon her pen met paper and she never looked back—much to the detriment of her high school education. Anna currently lives in Northern California, where she continues to write up a storm, binge watches her favorite TV shows and movies, and spends as much time as she can with her family and friends...and her cat, Snickers, who, let’s face it, rules the house.
Books by Anna J. Stewart
Harlequin Romantic Suspense
Honor Bound
Reunited with the P.I.
More Than a Lawman
Gone in the Night
Harlequin Heartwarming
A Dad for Charlie
Recipe for Redemption
The Bad Boy of Butterfly Harbor
Christmas, Actually
“The Christmas Wish”
Visit the Author Profile page at www.Harlequin.com for more titles.
For Victoria Curran
Whatever comes next is because you said yes
Contents
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
EXCERPT FROM CROSSING THE GOAL LINE BY KIM FINDLAY
CHAPTER ONE
DEPUTY MATT KNIGHT sat at his desk and stared at the divorce papers that had taken him three years to have drawn up. He stared at the black on white print, the familiar words blurring behind tired eyes.
“Just sign the thing already.” Even as he muttered to himself, his fingers tightened to the point of going numb. What on earth was stopping him? It wasn’t as if divorce was some big taboo these days. He certainly wasn’t holding out hope for a reconciliation. How could he when his soon-to-be ex had made it perfectly clear—well before Matt’s discharge papers from the army had been processed—that she’d moved on. There was no ill will. There were no feelings at all. It only made sense. If he was serious about moving on with his life, serious about becoming a father to an abandoned troubled teen, it was time to cut ties and start over.
His stomach knotted. Signing his name was the right thing to do. For everyone. And yet...
If only signing the decree didn’t mean admitting he’d failed. Matt had spent a good portion of his thirty-two years determined to avoid anything close to failure. He couldn’t shake the deadening sensation that writing his name only proved his father right.
He leaned forward, set his jaw. How messed up did he have to be to give credence to anything his long-dead father would have thought, especially when it came to what constituted failure? It was time to make this final break and move on with his life. If he didn’t owe that to himself, he certainly owed it to Kyle Winters. What kind of example would he be setting for the kid if Matt couldn’t put his own past aside? Besides, there were bonuses to starting fresh.
Bonuses like Lori Bradley.
His lips curved as an image of the lush, generous, quiet brunette with eyes as green as spring grass appeared in his mind.
The tip of the pen hovered.
“You can stare at that piece of paper as long as you want.” Deputy Oswald “Ozzy” Lakeman’s voice drifted across the small station house. “Whatever it says, it’s not going to change.”
Matt clicked his pen shut, tossed it onto the desk. He sat back in his creaking spring-loaded chair and swore he heard his divorce papers laugh at him. He looked over and found Ozzy grinning at him before he snapped his teeth through one of those mini carrots he’d been munching on of late.
“I thought you were taking Fletch’s patrol this afternoon,” Matt said.
“I am.” Ozzy leaned back and looked up at the station clock. He clicked his tongue. “Still have a few minutes to bug you. How am I doing?”
“At bugging me? Stellar performance, as always.” The banter came easily, as it had when he was in the army. The soldiers he’d served with had been his friends, his family. At times, he had to shake off the guilt that he had a new family now, a new group of friends while his fellow grunts... He swallowed the bitterness and grief.
Chances were Ozzy appreciated the downtime as much as he did. With Butterfly Harbor’s annual Monarch Festival less than a month away, the entire township was flitting around, prettying up store windows, touching up paintwork, finalizing sponsorship plans
and making certain the soon-to-arrive tourists were given the best show possible when it came to the Pacific Coast tourist town.
Everyone was too busy to get into much trouble save for the occasional parking and noise ordinance violations. That was just fine with Matt, but he’d lived long enough—and hard enough—to know the quiet wouldn’t last. “Do we have an ETA on when Luke’s back in the office?”
“Chief’s due back tomorrow morning according to Holly,” Ozzy said, referencing the owner of the Butterfly Diner and their boss’s wife. “We should have a full house again now that Fletch has returned from his honeymoon. Oh, hey, Jasper.” Ozzy glanced up at the teen hobbling out of the bathroom on crutches. “I unearthed a new box of files that need to be digitized. When you’re caught up.”
“On it.” Jasper O’Neill clicked his way over to the desk they’d given him last month and dropped into his chair. “Can’t wait to be off these things.” He leaned over and set the crutches against the wall before logging back on to his computer.
“It’s been almost six weeks.” Matt couldn’t believe that much time had passed since the teen had nearly gotten himself killed playing amateur detective. That Jasper had been the prime suspect in the string of increasingly disturbing break-ins and vandalism had been a driving factor. The kid hadn’t done himself any favors by dressing like death and taking pleasure in making people feel uncomfortable. But when the smoke cleared, the sheriff and his deputies had decided to take Jasper on. The boy’s determination and cleverness couldn’t be ignored. The part-time position with the police department allowed him to continue with his forensics studies, stay out of trouble and earn some serious résumé references.
“Only ten days to go.” Jasper swiped his hand over too-long bangs that covered dark eyes. “Then you guys will have to start taking me on patrol with you.”
Matt grinned. “We’ll see about that.” Personally, Matt was hoping Jasper would be up for renewing his friendship with Kyle. Jasper could be a good influence on him.
Matt pushed his chair back, stretched out his prosthetic leg and waited for the gentle click that, had he not left his actual leg on a dirt road in Iraq, would have felt like a muscle easing into place. “With Luke and Fletcher both out, I guess that means I’m on deck for the town council meeting tonight.” Matt barely resisted the urge to groan. What a way to spend a Friday night. He’d seen the setup coming for weeks; his coworkers’ planned absences that would ensure he’d be the one to make the final push for the sheriff’s department’s contribution to the Monarch Festival. The annual fall event was, at least until the new butterfly sanctuary was built, the town’s biggest claim to fame—and its biggest tourist draw. From the Butterfly Diner, to Harvey’s Hardware, to the Flutterby Inn, businesses were snapping up sponsorships and initiatives like nobody’s business.
While his boss and fellow deputies agreed they needed to participate, they’d also decided to focus on a job that would be of benefit beyond a week’s worth of events and activities. He pinned Ozzy with a determined, hopeful stare. “Unless you’d like to—”
“Not on your life.” Ozzy held up his hands as if shielding himself from a radiation blast. “Not on my life. Not on anyone’s life.”
Jasper chuckled as he tapped away on his keyboard.
“As long as you’re sure,” Matt mumbled. “You could at least come with me.” It made sense. Despite living in Butterfly Harbor for almost three years, Matt was still considered a newcomer. Before becoming a deputy, he’d mostly kept to himself having moved here alone after his separation. Not that he hadn’t piqued his neighbors’ curiosity, but he kept his private life private. As far as anyone in town knew, he was an unencumbered bachelor. Ozzy, on the other hand, had been born and raised here, which meant everyone knew his business. “I could use the backup.”
“No offense, but the only way I’d voluntarily attend the Mayor Hamilton show is if it was a direct order from my boss.” Ozzy visibly shuddered. “Lucky for me, that is not you.”
“But you’re good at throwing me under the bus,” Matt said.
“Yep. You don’t have a history with Gil.” Ozzy ducked his round face out of sight at the mention of the mayor. “And it’s not as if he’d take anything I have to say seriously anyway. I know what he thinks of me.”
Matt flicked his thumb across the stack of divorce papers as anger simmered low and hot. “And what’s that?”
“That I’m a drag on the department.” Ozzy flinched as if speaking the words out loud hurt. “Word is he’s planning on instituting physical fitness requirements for all of us in the department. Like what they do over in Durante.”
“I bet Luke will have a thing or two to say about that.” When Ozzy didn’t respond, Matt prodded deeper. “Is that what all this diet stuff’s been about, Oz? You worried about keeping your job?”
“No.”
“Oz.” Matt used the same tone with the younger deputy that he had with new recruits. Granted, Ozzy wasn’t about to walk into a war zone, but sometimes the same medicine worked on different ailments. “What’s going on?”
Oz shook his head. “It’s not a big deal, Matt. You know how Gil is.”
“Yes, I do.” One of the reasons Matt wasn’t overly fond of their mayor. If it wasn’t for Ozzy’s tech know-how and efficient computer skills, they’d still be typing on Selectric typewriters and stuffing the wooden filing cabinets to the point of overflowing. “I’ll tell you something right now, Oz. If you’re looking to lose weight to appease anyone other than yourself, it won’t work in the long run. Short term, maybe.”
“I know. At least I’m feeling better.” Oz shrugged in that casual way he had of trying not to call attention to himself. “And I’m up to a mile-and-a-half run in the mornings. Well, I can do that much without wanting to puke. Mostly.” He looked at the carrot in his hand. “I’m getting really sick of these things, though.”
Personally, Matt was surprised the deputy hadn’t turned orange. “Don’t let anyone else determine how you live your life, Oz. You want to lose weight, you do it for yourself. Not because some jerk like Gil Hamilton’s bullied you into it.”
“Word,” Jasper muttered.
“I hear you.” Ozzy nodded. “And I know you’re right. Anytime I think about quitting, I remember that day Charlie got trapped in the caves down at the beach. I should have been able to help Fletcher more than I did. They both could have drowned.”
It wasn’t the first time Ozzy had made mention of the near-catastrophic event. There also wasn’t any mistaking the hint of self-loathing and disappointment that came with letting the people you care about down; or worse, believing you had. That day had been rough on all of them; the idea that eight-year-old Charlie might never have made it out of those caves if it hadn’t been for her now stepfather’s actions and the support of most of the town still made his gut clench.
“No one believes you let anyone down.” Matt chose his words carefully. “Not Luke, not Fletcher and not me, who by the way, took three times as long getting down the beach as you did.” He slapped his hand against his prosthesis. “If we don’t blame you, there’s no reason to blame yourself.”
“Yeah, well.” Ozzy shook off Matt’s attempt to placate him and returned his bag of carrots to the mini fridge under the coffee station. “I’m not going to let anything like that happen again. I want Luke to know he can count on me for whatever might happen. That all of you can. And if the mayor does institute physical tests, I’ll be ready for them.”
“As long as you’re doing it for yourself, too.”
“Funny how times change.” Ozzy looked genuinely surprised. “You know, back in high school, word got around my mother had put me on a diet. Some of the guys on the football team loaded my locker with those cream-filled sponge cakes. Ruined my first edition copy of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy.”
There was little Matt loathed more than bullies.
“Any of those jerks carry a gun and get a patrol car with spinning flashing lights?”
Ozzy grinned. “Nope.”
“Then you win. Speaking of winning.” Matt gestured to the clock on the wall. “Patrol started five minutes ago.”
“Oh! Geez.” Ozzy spun around, checked his belt for his weapon and phone, dived for his jacket and stumbled to the door. “Thanks, Matt. I’ll see you later. Oh.” He poked his head back in the office. “If you want something to look forward to tonight, Abby told me Lori is going to be representing the Flutterby Inn at the town meeting. You know, in case you want to say hi or something.”
Matt wadded up a piece of paper, chucked it at him and yelled, “Be grateful I don’t have a Twinkie!”
But Ozzy had made his point. Just the mention of Lori was enough to take the sting out of Matt’s obligation for tonight. There was something about just laying eyes on Lori that made his day better. He’d been careful with her, slowly building up their casual friendship despite his desire for more. Lunch. Coffee. A couple of small town events. He couldn’t let himself get too interested, too tempted, as long as he was still officially married, and the truth was, he was both—interested and tempted. He enjoyed the time he spent with her, felt the dormant fire inside of him light up when she looked at him, smiled at him. Laughed at his stupid jokes. It took a special woman to get his sense of humor. Which was why, in the last few weeks, since soon after Holly and Luke’s wedding, he’d been avoiding her.
Matt Knight was all about doing right by people. Especially those he cared about. But there wasn’t any moving forward, not with his life, not with Lori, as long as he was still anchored to the past.
The phone rang. Before Matt could reach for the receiver, Jasper answered. “It’s for you, Matt. A Chris Walters?”
“That’s Kyle’s caseworker,” Matt said as he picked up his extension. “Chris? Kyle okay?”
“Doing well, actually.” The social worker’s encouraging words belied the tension in his voice. “We’re still on track for an early release. For now at least.”
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