It wasn’t easy, especially when I also had to tamp down a strong desire to join her in the shower. We’d made love the night before, but she was skittish when she woke up—and I didn’t push. She was here, and that was enough for now.
“Morning.” Her voice rang through my kitchen and then she appeared, wearing her clothes from yesterday, her hair on top of her head in a messy bun.
“Coffee?”
“Yeah, that’d be nice.”
Coffee in hand, I approached with caution. “You good?”
She nodded, accepting the steaming mug. Jealous, I watched her lips wrap around the lip of the mug, wishing they were pressed to mine. She took a sip and set it on the counter next to her.
“What’s wrong?” I stepped close, but stopped short of touching her.
She stared at my bare feet and then closed her eyes. “Did we make a mistake?”
“No, not even a little one. This is a good thing. A very good fucking thing.”
“You want me? This?”
Now I bridged the gap, my hardness connecting with her curves, making sure there were zero loopholes in my words. “More than anything in the world. No hesitation.”
My lips met with her forehead, and I placed a chaste kiss there. “No hesitation at all,” I repeated, then picked up her mug and put it back in her hands. “Drink your coffee.”
“I’d like to see your hotel in broad daylight. The Firefly, right?”
I nodded. “Then we’ll do that.”
She took another sip of her coffee, keeping her eyes trained on me.
“Oh, your phone rang,” I told her.
She rummaged through her bag and pulled out her phone. When she murmured “Nat” as she checked the screen, I let a thousand bad thoughts go on a deep exhale.
“You can call her back if you want. I’m going to grab a shower.”
Lynx nodded but was quiet, seeming to be taking in her surroundings.
“Want to go out there?” I asked.
“The balcony?”
I nodded.
“I think so. I love how the windows are wide open, no drapes.”
“I didn’t really give it any thought, but thanks. Come on.”
I opened the door and pulled out a chair for her. Ocean air surrounded us, and a hundred memories washed over me of the night we met on the balcony in Vegas. I’d wanted to be her knight in shining armor even back then.
A chill ran down my spine as I walked back into the air-conditioning to give Lynx some space.
Could I pull it off?
I WALKED through the balcony doors a while later and took in the beauty in front of me . . . and I don’t mean the water. Lynx was lying back in the chair, large sunglasses over her eyes, the sun beating down on her face.
“Natalie good?” I asked.
“She’s coming to visit. Wants to take me to some frou-frou shrink. Thinks I need to talk to someone, and she’s pulling the I’m practically your mom card.”
“Do you think it would help?” I asked, all innocent as I sat down next to her. Hey, I went to prep school; I’m not all hood. I know a bit about reverse psychology.
“I don’t want to talk.”
“Sometimes it may help. I don’t know.” Leaning forward in my chair, I took her hands in mine.
“I want to close the door, not reopen it. I feel like all that talking is like cutting fresh wounds.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t that sort of happening anyway?” I asked, hinting at the cuts on her palm without saying the words.
She shrugged without looking me in the eye.
“Is Sammy talking to someone?”
She nodded.
“Does it seem to be helping?”
Another shrug.
“How about we actually talk and not only nod and shrug,” I said, calling her out. “I’m here for you, so let’s discuss it. Maybe you’ll give it a try and see? It could help, plus Nat’s coming all this way.”
“Maybe.” She squeezed my hand, and I held hers tighter. “Just maybe. I don’t know.”
At least she was talking.
“Is Ash coming? The kids? I can’t see him not checking out the Firefly.” I got a smile and a sparkle in her eyes with that question.
“The whole gang is coming, so I’ll meet the twins and see Quinney. God, he’s going to be so big.”
“Turning into a nice young man. That’s why Asher wanted the hotel. Wants to give him something a hundred percent legit. If this works out, we’re going to build another. Boutique luxury experiences, private, secluded. Not huge enormous monstrosities, but smaller, catering to people’s whims.”
“I hope Quinney remembers me.”
It was awesome to see her face light up when talking about Quinn.
“Babe, no one could ever forget you. Even a scrawny kid you used to babysit.”
Another smile and sparkle from her made my heart swell.
Winning.
ASHER SLAPPED me on the back. “You done good, Mike.”
“I thought you were all worried,” I said with a grin, puffing on my cigar.
We sat around a makeshift desk on what would be the patio outside my office at the Firefly, Asher in his motorcycle boots and me in my basketball shoes—a pair not to be messed with on any day. Fucking right I was going to have a mack-daddy office . . . I’d worked hard as shit for it.
“For a while there, I was,” Asher said. “Now that you got the girl back where you want her, don’t push her, Mike. Don’t rush her.”
“Because you know how to do that so well?”
“I never said to do what I did. I’m an idiot. A rich one, thank fuck for that. The hotel is fucking perfect, so you know what I say?”
“Hmm?”
He stared me down with his silver eyes, his cigar burning between two fingers. “Don’t fuck it up. Don’t fucking fuck up anything.”
“Copy, sir,” I said, earning myself a smack on the back of my head.
“Cut your fucking hair too. I’m the only one with good hair around here.”
I lifted my cigar to my mouth. “I plan to when I get my lady back for good.”
LATER THAT evening, Asher being Asher, he arranged for some private catered dinner on the Firefly property, specifically where the pool deck was currently being built. Our Miami Wave gang and Asher’s family were seated around one big table lit by tea-light candles—Natalie’s soft touch. After a small rundown of dates, announcements, thanks, and toasts, Asher shared the hotel’s official opening date and some other big news.
“It came as a bit of surprise with a teen boy and twin toddlers, but I guess we’re just that good. Nat and I are having a baby.” He raised his glass and winked at his wife. “Just one baby this time, not two. My swimmers are good, but not that good. Plus, I’m getting old.” He ran a hand through his thick hair. “Eh, I guess not that old.”
The guy was so fucking in love with himself, but not nearly as much as he loved his family.
I wanted that. All of it.
As congratulations rang out from around the table, the need to squeeze Lynx’s hand or thigh ran through me, coursing through my veins, but I couldn’t. She’d intentionally sat across from me, her eyes on Asher and Natalie kissing and hanging on to each other as if their last breath depended on it.
Asher mouthed love you, doll and kissed his wife again. Staci was crying at the sight; she’d been in Vegas when Asher and Natalie finally ended their decade-long separation.
My gaze returned to Lynx, noting her glassy eyes and how she sniffed back tears. We’d been seeing each other about every other day for the last two weeks—a meal here and there, a cup of coffee, a run, but that was it—since she’d spent that one glorious night with me.
I wasn’t pushing or complaining. I wanted more, but in due time.
Natalie arrived a few days ago, and had been pushing Lynx to see a new therapist. I didn’t know who or what or where or when, and when I’d asked Natalie about it, she told me, “Talk to the h
and, Big Mike. I got the deets from Carson. You stay out of it, way out.”
I didn’t have any other choice. Those women were batshit crazy.
I’d never guessed Lynx would refuse to sit next to me tonight, though. Before I even knew what I was doing, I got up from the table and rounded it, stopping on the other side.
“Get up,” I told Sampson.
“The fuck?”
“Get up, dude. I want to sit here with Lynx.”
Lynx frowned up at me. “Mike, don’t do this.”
“Michael,” I said, correcting her.
“Michael.”
To me, it was a whisper, a prayer, a beckoning—not a warning like she meant it to be.
“Move, for the last time,” I told Sampson, and he did. After all, I was his boss.
I slid into his chair and smoothed my hand down Lynx’s bare arm. A shiver ran through her, and I all too willingly absorbed it. When she looked at me, I pressed my lips to her forehead, marking her in front of everyone watching us.
That’s right, they should know. I was laying claim for good.
“You want a baby, Lynx?” It was a whisper, soft enough for only her to hear. When she closed her eyes, I traced the small furrow in her brow with my lips. “I want you to have my babies. One or ten, I don’t care, I just want it with you.”
“What if I don’t deserve them? Babies.” She leaned in, whispering in my ear.
“You do. You need to see someone, get over this. Nat has me all cock-blocked, keeping me at arm’s length, and I fucking hate it. Then you don’t sit next to me. I want to know what’s going on,” I said, my whisper more of a growl. “I want in, all the way in.”
My lips sought Lynx’s, and I kissed the fuck out of her. If she would have told me to stop, I would have, but she didn’t. So I kissed her.
Vaguely, I heard a catcall and a whistle. These were our friends, our family, so who cared? Not me.
“Lynx,” I said softly. “I’ll do anything to help you get over this, climb this mountain.”
“Michael.” This time when she breathed my name, it wasn’t meant to be a deterrent. It was a salve.
“Want to get out of here?”
She nodded.
Grabbing her hand, I stood from the table and gave everyone a quick wave. “We’re out.”
Natalie waved back. “Lynx, don’t forget we’re taking the twins to the playground in the morning. Quinney is going to go to work with Ash and Mike.”
“Quinn,” the young buck growled at her from next to his father.
With a smile like a cat that ate all the cream, Natalie turned back to her conversation. She didn’t care what any of those alpha brutes said; she did what she wanted. We’d all learned that a long time ago.
As for tonight, the little vixen set me up. Pushed my buttons by keeping me in the dark when it came to Lynx, tossing me right into the open flames.
“The place is really turning out gorgeous.” Lynx squeezed my hand as we walked through the almost complete lobby. Soon we would start bringing in a few travel experts to get a glimpse of the Firefly.
“I never thought I’d go into the hotel biz, but I guess it’s in my blood.”
“That’s not a bad thing. You can be like your dad when it comes to business.”
“Not entirely like him. I want to add my own touch. See things the way I see them. As for the personal stuff, we can’t ever really be family,” I told her. “I never wanted to do what he did—tear my family apart, make my kid feel unwanted, and walk away unmarked.”
“You could never. Your heart is way too big. That’s why they call you Big Mike.”
“You mean it’s not for my muscles?”
This got me the full-on smile, a laugh, and a punch in the arm. I’d take another.
“Where do you want to go?” I asked as we stood in the circular driveway, my convertible out front.
“Can we take a ride?”
“Yep, let’s go.”
Opening the door for her, I watched Lynx slide into my BMW and remembered all the nights I’d driven around, endlessly looking for her.
She was here now, and I planned to keep it that way.
After jumping in the driver’s seat, I pressed the gas pedal and we sped out. My hand worked the manual shift, and for the first time, I was pissed I didn’t buy the automatic.
I drove north to Miami Beach, past all the luxury hotels, and pulled over at the end of the strip. When I lowered the top, the ocean air surrounded us in its salt and humidity, and I took in the beauty in front of me.
“Can I kiss you again?”
“Oh, now you’re asking permission?”
“Nope.” I leaned across the console and took her lips in mine. On a soft exhale, our tongues twisted, and I slid my hand behind her neck and underneath her braids.
Squeezing gently, I massaged the tension from Lynx’s neck and swallowed all of her moans. It was perfect. I could have stayed here all night like this, but she pulled away.
“You okay?”
She nodded and brought her hand to my face, running the back of it down my cheek. I gently took her wrist and turned her palm toward my skin.
“You don’t have to hide anything from me,” I said, my hushed tone swallowed by the night.
Lynx closed her eyes and whispered, “I’m going to see that person Nat wants me to see.”
I nodded, trying hard to contain my excitement. After years as a bouncer, I could do calm and collected.
“I want to try,” she said, opening her eyes to look at me with so much emotion, it nearly stopped my heart. “You, me, us. Slow. I don’t want you to be in the dark. It’s just hard.”
Another nod from me.
We’d already had several rounds of the same question, but I didn’t push. I knew better than to do that; the only thing I could do was bide my time. But I could tell she wasn’t finished talking.
Lynx gave me a sad smile. “But I need to take the lead. For years, everything was so out of my control. I know it was my choice, my doing, but now I want to be in control. See someone, take charge of the bad feelings, get a job, all that.”
“I’m by your side, however you want. You’re in charge.”
I was getting my girl back. My woman. On her terms, but she was back.
“I want a job,” she said. “At the club.”
This time, I shook my head.
“I need to get out of my place, doing too much sitting around. I also need to feel safe. I want to work there . . . because you’re there.”
“Lynx . . .” When she put it that way, what could I say? “Staci’s running the club more and more, and I’m going to be at the hotel soon. I don’t want you at the Wave. Too much past crap and bullshit all wrapped up there. It’s not a bad place. Believe me, I run a classy joint, but no. Just no.”
“So, the hotel. I can help there. I’m already in love with the place.”
Hmm. That idea had legs.
“What about marketing?” I asked. “Or giving tours to travel people?”
She bit her lower lip. “I thought bartending?”
“No, babe. Not bartending.” I bit down a laugh I didn’t think she would appreciate.
“You sure?”
“As sure as my name is Michael Anthony Wind, and I was apparently born for the hotel biz.”
“Okay, so can I start doing something soon?”
“If it means I can see more of you, hell yes.”
“I need to stay busy, and whether I want to admit it or not, I don’t always feel safe unless you’re around.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“Can we kiss again?”
“Hell yeah.” And I was back across the console.
LYNX MET Natalie at the park the following day, and watched with equal parts pride and envy as Natalie played with the twins. They were adorable, Lillie dressed in a white tank and a pink tutu, and Parker clad in tiny jeans and a white T-shirt—like a mini Nat and Asher.
Want and nee
d burned in Lynx’s belly. She’d never had a normal family life growing up, never imagined being a parent one day, but suddenly it didn’t seem so far-fetched. Maybe one day she could?
“I’m so glad you’re going to see someone,” Natalie said as she pushed Parker in the swing.
“It’s time, I guess. I’ve been moping around here. Even Sammy is doing better than me. I need to pull my life together once and for all, stop lying to myself that I’m okay, and stop ruining the lives of everyone around me.” Lynx pushed Lillie, the desire to have her own child raging. Lillie’s hair blew in the wind, taking flight with every push.
How did Michael know these private thoughts of hers? It was like they were meant for each other.
“Aw, honey, don’t think that. You don’t ruin anything.”
“Look at how I lied to you in the beginning about what I was really doing. And what about how Mike learned about Quinn? All of it, it was messed up back in Vegas, and then I made it all worse down here.”
“You didn’t. I know it. You did what you thought was right. This is why I’m so glad you’re going to see the doctor.”
“Higher,” Parker yelled.
“Okay, you little daredevil. Just like your dad, my big, bad boy.”
“Make it higher!”
Natalie pushed the swing a little higher, and Parker pumped his short legs. “How’s Mike? He’s being patient?”
“More than I deserve.”
“Lynx, I’ve known you a long time now, trusted my own child with you back in the day. You deserve the world. Stop with all this negative talk. You’re too good for that.”
She shrugged. Some days she agreed, others she didn’t.
“One day, this’ll be you. A bunch of kids. Mike taking care of you and them. He’ll be a great dad.”
“I was just thinking about that earlier. It’s like my thoughts are playing out on my face these days.”
“I could tell. You had this far-off, rosy-cheeked look. I know the look, honey.”
“Oh, please . . .”
“Oh, please, nothing. Come on, let’s take these monkeys to the coffee shop.”
Tinged (The Electric Tunnel Book 3) Page 12
