The colour of Cynthia’s face matched her cardigan. ‘How dare you—?’
‘I dare very easily. You can leave now. You’re not welcome here.’
Cynthia’s mouth opened and closed a few times then she turned and stormed out of the cottage, heels clicking on the tiled floor in the hall.
As soon as the door slammed, I slumped onto the sofa, shaking. Through the shock and anger, one little ray of positivity shone; I’d finally stood up to her and it felt good. If only Gary had had the strength to do the same when we were teens, we wouldn’t be in this mess.
‘Are you okay, sweetheart?’ asked Kay, returning to the lounge. ‘That woman’s vicious, but you certainly gave her what for.’
I smiled. ‘I did, didn’t I?’
Kay nodded. ‘You look happier than I’ve seen you in ages.’
‘I feel it. Cynthia Dawson is not my problem anymore and I can’t tell you how good that feels. Do you know what? I’ve never stood up to that woman in sixteen years. First I was too young and respectful, then I was too scared of her, then I was too scared of upsetting Gary. Every time I let her say something nasty about me or someone else, I think a little part of me crumbled. I lost who I was. I think the real me might have just returned.’
‘Does that mean you’re going to start telling everyone what you think of them? Should I be scared?’
I laughed. ‘Don’t panic. I’d never be that blunt with anyone except Cynthia. Or my mother. Or Clare perhaps. I just meant that the strong, confident woman that I used to be is clearly still in there somewhere. She’s always been present at work, but she never appeared at home. Until now.’ Perhaps the future wasn’t so bleak. Coming up were a house sale and a divorce, but were those really bad things? No. They were lines in the sand ready to face a new future. A new life. A new me.
15
✉︎ From Curtis
I hope you’ve given our conversation some thought. You know I’m right!
* * *
✉︎ To Curtis
I’ve thought of little else! Don’t know if I dare, though! Xx
* * *
✉︎ To Sarah
Is it still OK to drop by after school? Maybe we could nip to Minty’s for a quick drink xx
* * *
✉︎ From Sarah
You’ve twisted my arm! See you later xx
‘What’s this?’ Sarah asked as I thrust a sparkly silver gift bag into her hands on Wednesday evening after she’d locked the door and turned the sign round to ‘closed’. ‘It’s not my birthday for a while yet.’
‘It’s a little peace offering,’ I said. ‘I’ve been a rubbish friend recently.’
‘Hey, don’t say that.’ She shook her head. ‘You’ve always been there for me and I’d be a rubbish friend if I didn’t understand why you’ve been a little…’ She paused as if trying to find the right word, ‘… distracted lately.’
I smiled. ‘Distracted? I like it. It’s a good description. Open it, then.’
She gently placed the bag on the counter and pulled out some crumpled lilac tissue paper followed by an A5-sized notepad bound in ivory silk with a teal ribbon round it. ‘My Wedding Planner,’ she read. She flicked it open. Soft cream, beige, and pastel blue pages revealed headings such as, ‘My Bridesmaids’, ‘My Cake’, ‘My Dress’. ‘Elise! It’s gorgeous. I love it.’ Still holding the planner, she threw her arms round me and I hugged her back tightly, relieved that things weren’t awkward between us after my ‘distracted’ behaviour.
‘Thank you,’ she whispered into my hair. ‘And thanks for coming round. I’ve missed you.’
‘I’ve missed you too.’ I gave her another squeeze then released her. ‘Now get cashed up while I vacuum, then we can get to the pub. There’s something I want to run by you.’
Over a bottle of Pinot, we discussed Sarah’s wedding in the same sort of detail we used to when we were younger only, this time, it was for real instead of a fantasy. She’d been a little reluctant to talk about it at first, but I managed to convince her that I was genuinely interested and that I might have been a little too ‘distracted’ to take it all in on Sunday at The Chocolate Pot. It soon became apparent that I’d been a little more than ‘distracted’; I hadn’t listened to a word because hardly anything she told me rang a bell. No wonder Clare had felt the need to have a quiet word.
When we’d exhausted wedding talk, she asked me how I felt about the house going on the market. ‘It’s officially up for sale tomorrow,’ I said. ‘I feel quite relaxed about it at the moment, but I suspect I’ll feel differently when we get an offer.’
‘It’s a big step.’
‘I know. Speaking of big steps, I took a huge one with the delightful Cynthia on Sunday evening.’
Sarah listened, eyes wide, as I told her about my confrontation. ‘You go girl!’ she said. ‘I’m impressed. It must have taken some restraint not to tell her about Gary.’
‘It did. Despite what he’s put me through, I’ll always care about him. I still want him to be happy, even if that means without me. I warned him that he should bite the bullet and tell her before she found out through her evil little coven of spies, but it was his choice. I suspect the whole truth will come out soon. It won’t be pretty when it does.’
‘Have you seen him recently?’
I shook my head. ‘Not since he begged me to go round two weeks ago and asked me to move back in and have his baby.’
Sarah clapped her hand across her mouth. ‘Oh my God! No way!’
I relayed my unexpected encounter with Gary and figured I might as well fill her in on my epic fail with Stevie in Stardust too. ‘I take it by your shocked expression that Stevie hasn’t told you about it.’
‘I’ve seen him a few times since then and he hasn’t breathed a word. Is there anything else you want to confess?’ Sarah asked. ‘Because I might have to order something stronger to cope with the shock.’
I laughed. ‘I think you can close the confession box now, Priest Peterson. I’m done. I hope.’ I leaned back on the chair and rolled my shoulders a few times. ‘I can see why Catholics go for this confession malarkey. It’s very therapeutic.’
We both sipped on our wine, smiling.
‘What?’ I said, as Sarah narrowed her eyes at me suspiciously.
‘There’s something else, isn’t there? You said earlier that you wanted to run something by me and it feels like you’ve been evading it all evening.’
I chewed my lip as I thought about the phone conversation I’d had with Curtis the night before. I leaned forward again. ‘Okay. You’ve got me. I do have one more confession, but before you run for the hills, this is something I’d like to do rather than something I’ve actually done. Or at least I think I would. But I don’t know if I dare. I need your take on it.’
Sarah sat forward too and picked up her glass. ‘Sounds intriguing. Confess away.’
‘This getting over Gary malarkey is hard work. Some days I’m fine and other days I’m a mess. Saying no to his baby, initiating divorce proceedings, putting the house on the market and standing up to his evil mother have all been huge steps in my journey towards a Gary-free future. The problem is, I still love him. Or at least, I think I do. Curtis has come up with a cunning plan that might help me move on a bit more quickly and put my feelings for Gary behind me.’ I took a deep breath. ‘I want to get laid.’
Sarah’s wine sloshed all over her hands as she tried to put it down on the table. ‘Oh my God! Did I hear that right? You want to get laid? Have you been spending too much time with Clare?’
‘I know.’ I passed her a tissue from my bag to mop up the spillage. ‘It sounds more like something Mrs Potty Mouth would come out with. I told Curtis it was at the top of his crazy ideas list, but I’m not sure it is that crazy after all. I’ve been thinking about it a lot. There’s no way I’m ready for another relationship, but as you know, Gary’s the only man I’ve ever been with. I hadn’t even kissed another man until Stevie and that wasn’t
what you’d call a proper kiss. I’m not saying I’m going to morph into Clare and jump into bed with anything with a pulse, but maybe a one-off one-night-stand is in order.’ Looking at Sarah’s shocked expression, I put my hands over my face. ‘I think I’ve had too much wine. It is a crazy idea isn’t it?’
She shook her head. ‘No. I get what you’re saying and, funnily enough, I was having a very similar conversation with one of my reps today.’
I lowered my hands. ‘Really?’
‘Yeah. I get a lot of my gifts from this rep called Daniel. He’s about our age and he’s lovely. He didn’t seem his usual cheerful self today so I asked if he was okay. He told me he’d recently separated from his wife after discovering she’d been unfaithful. They’d been childhood sweethearts, just like you and Gary, and a friend had suggested that he go out and sew his oats. He said he liked the idea in principle, but he’s only ever been with his wife and wouldn’t know where to start. He jokingly asked if I had any nice single friends who’d be gentle with him and not laugh at him for being so inexperienced.’
‘You’re not just making that up?’
She shook her head. ‘I don’t think I have that good an imagination. I’m not suggesting you two should jump into bed together. I’m not about to pimp you out! But if you fancied an introduction to someone who’s going through something similar to you…?’
Interesting. An introduction to someone who Sarah knew and liked would surely be better and safer than meeting a stranger in a club or online. ‘I don’t know,’ I said eventually. ‘I think I would feel a bit like I was being pimped out. You wouldn’t tell him I wanted sex, would you?’
‘God no! What do you take me for? It really wouldn’t be like that. Just two people who’ve both been crapped on by their partners getting together to talk things over and maybe offering each other some emotional support. And if it leads to a quick tumble, so be it.’
Sarah took another sip of her wine while I mulled over the idea. ‘There’s no need to make a decision now,’ she said. ‘Have a think about it and let me know what you decide. Remember that you started this conversation saying you want to get laid and wondering about a one-night stand. This is just me offering something that isn’t quite that extreme, but which could help you achieve your goal.’
I nodded. ‘It’s not a no. It’s not a yes either, but I’ll definitely give it some thought.’
‘You do that.’
I gave it a lot of thought as I walked back to Seashell Cottage. Sod it. What did I have to lose?
✉︎ To Sarah
Thanks for a great evening. It was so good to catch up rather than sit at home and think about the next big step of the house going on the market tomorrow. Speaking of big steps, I’ve given it some thought. If you really rate this Daniel, I’d like to meet him to share stories. Not sure I have the nerve to go through with anything else, despite what I announced in Minty’s! xx
* * *
✉︎ From Sarah
Yay! I’ll set something up. Who knows what might develop? He seems like a great guy. I promise I won’t tell him you only want him for his body! xx
I grinned as I put my phone down. I suspected that I wouldn’t have the courage to take it further with Daniel, even if I really liked him, but it would be good to share stories with someone going through the same thing. Oh well, wherever it took me, the next part of Operation Getting Over Gary was underway. Curtis would be proud of me. Actually, I was proud of me and, bizarrely, I had Cynthia to thank for it. Having the guts to stand up to her on Sunday had done wonders for me. It had made me take control of my life again. The first step had been to get my friendship with Sarah back on track which the evening at Minty’s had definitely done. The next step had been to fall out of love with Gary and I was one step further towards that too. I’d love to see Cynthia’s face if I told her that her visit had had the opposite effect on me than she’d desired; instead of running back to her son, I was probably running into the arms of another man.
16
My heart raced so fast, I thought I might pass out at any moment. Every time the restaurant door opened, my stomach churned and I shivered in anticipation wondering if it could be him. I’d never been on a blind date before. In fact, I’d never been on a first date. Gary and I had been part of a group from school who met at the cinema most Saturdays. One day, when we were the only two who turned up, he’d put his arm round me and kissed me. I hadn’t realised until that moment how big a crush I’d developed on him and how much I’d been longing for him to make a move. There was therefore no first date build-up, and we didn’t have to play the ‘getting to know you’ game because we were already friends.
Staring at the door, I sighed. This was hideous. How did people do this regularly? Sarah had said that Daniel looked a little like Gary. I’d always been drawn to dark hair and dark eyes so that was a good thing. It could equally be a bad thing if the resemblance was too strong.
I looked at my phone: 7.42 p.m. He was only twelve minutes late. It wasn’t that late, was it? He may have had trouble parking. I glanced around the restaurant, hoping I wouldn’t catch any sympathetic glances from other diners who suspected I’d been stood up. It had started raining so that could have slowed traffic down.
Daniel had chosen Salt & Pepper Lodge and I was impressed. It wasn’t on Gary’s shortlist of favourite restaurants so this was my first visit. The vegetarian and vegan selection was extensive and I’d already chosen my meal… if Daniel ever showed up.
Fiddling with the salt, I tried, but failed, not to look at my phone again: 7.51 p.m. I’d give him until eight. If he hadn’t shown by then, he wasn’t going to, and I wasn’t going to humiliate myself by staying any longer. Then I panicked. Surely twenty minutes late was a definite no-show. Did I really need to give him thirty? Why was I even debating? I already knew I was going to wait until eight. He was Sarah’s friend and she’d never have set us up if he was unreliable. Something must have happened.
‘Thank you,’ I said to the waiter ten minutes later as I handed over a ten-pound note for my drink. ‘Please keep the change. I’m sorry I hogged a table.’
‘It’s no problem. Tuesdays aren’t usually busy,’ he said. ‘I’m sorry your friend didn’t show.’
I smiled and hoped the tears pricking my eyes wouldn’t make it down my cheeks. ‘Thank you.’
Standing up, I picked up my bag and cursed myself for not bringing a coat or a brolly. I was going to get very wet walking back to Seashell Cottage. Perfect end to a perfect evening.
‘Elise! Thank God you’re still here.’ I looked towards the door to see a tall, athletically built man dashing towards me. His dark hair was plastered to his head and there was muck on his face and down his soggy pale blue shirt.
‘Daniel?’
He nodded. ‘I’m so, so sorry. My car had a blow-out and I had to change the tyre and, as you can see, it’s peeing it down. I’d have phoned the restaurant because I don’t have your number, but I forgot to charge my phone. I kept praying you’d still be here. Have I screwed up? I’ll understand if you want to leave, especially given the state of me, but I’m really hoping you’ll stay.’ He finally paused for breath.
I glanced at the waiter hovering nearby who smiled and nodded then discreetly moved away. There was something instantly attractive and vulnerable about Daniel and I knew I’d regret it if I walked away.
‘I’ll stay,’ I said. ‘But on one condition.’
‘Anything.’
‘You get yourself to the bathroom and give your face a little scrub.’
He put his hand up to his cheek and wrinkled his nose. ‘It’s a deal. Thank you. I’d give you a hug, but I don’t want to drench that gorgeous dress. Sarah wasn’t wrong when she said you were stunning.’
I blushed. ‘Sarah said that?’ I looked down at my long, floaty coral dress with a delicate print of seashells and seahorses on it.
‘Yes. And she also said that if I mess you about, she’ll never order from
me again and she’ll rip my bollocks off and mount them in her next floral arrangement. So please don’t tell her I was late because I’m a little bit scared of her right now.’
The thought of that made me laugh. ‘Get yourself cleaned up. I promise I’ll still be here when you get back.’
When Daniel emerged from the gents, his hair was dry – presumably from the hand-dryer – and sticking up slightly. He had a look of a younger Colin Farrell about him. Very nice. His face was scrubbed and he’d somehow acquired a clean white shirt.
‘Do you always have a spare shirt in your back pocket?’
Daniel laughed. ‘One of the waiters took pity on me and loaned me his spare.’ He sat down. ‘I’m so sorry again. I’ve been looking forward to meeting you all week. I’m glad you could come out on a school night. Or did term finish last week?’
‘We broke up on Friday, but I was in school yesterday and today for training. I’m finished now, though.’
‘They didn’t have teachers who looked like you when I was at school,’ he said. ‘I might have done better if they had.’ He clapped his hand over his mouth. ‘I can’t believe I just said that. That was unbelievably cheesy, wasn’t it? Again, I apologise. Sarah probably told you that I’ve only ever dated my wife… ex-wife… so I’m completely out of practice when it comes to dating. Not that this is a date. Unless you want it to be.’ He shook his head. ‘I think I might just stop talking.’ He took a swig of his wine.
I laughed. ‘Firstly, please relax. Secondly, I’m out of practice too as Gary was also my childhood sweetheart. Thirdly… about that chat-up line… don’t ever, ever say anything like that again or I may have to ask Sarah to carry out her threat.’
Finding Hope at Lighthouse Cove Page 12
