A heavy thud sounded near her head, causing her to open her eyes and turn her head to investigate the startling sound. A knife was impaling a large and intimidating spider to the tree. Colorful fluids and viscera oozed from the gaping wound. The fuzzy creature’s many legs waved about in panic and pain, as if it were performing a death dance. Its chelicerae wriggled frantically and defensively, and futilely. She gaped at the petrifying sight, which was only ten inches from her head.
“It’s mighty dangerous to be wandering around here in the dark and alone, Blue Eyes. This area abounds in spiders and snakes and alligators and such. Need a ride to Savannah?” he calmly offered.
Shannon whirled and stared at the man approaching her on foot. His skill with a hunting blade was apparent, for he had struck his target accurately and from a distance. With Dan’s reins clasped loosely in his left hand, Blane Stevens casually strolled toward the astonished redhead. “How did you find me? And why did you bother, unless to further harass me? I see you persuaded them not to confiscate Dan.”
He grinned nonchalantly and replied, “I saw them first. But even if I hadn’t, Dan wouldn’t have allowed anyone to take him captive.”
“Like master, like horse,” she scoffed bitterly. She refused to show or speak gratitude for his preventing the enormous spider from crawling over her and probably biting her. “One of us isn’t going to remain here.”
He shook his sun-kissed head as he debated, “You’re wrong, Shannon. Both of us stay here until we resolve some troubling matters. I talked with Matti while you were sneaking off, and I’m concerned over these riddles. I know it was stupid of me to stake you out like a Comanche captive, but I needed time to think before acting more rashly. Don’t you know I could never kill you or injure you? I couldn’t even stand to watch you hurting yourself. During a war, men think, say, and do crazy things. Blame my work or my past; I was raised hard and fast and wary and harsh.” He halted and dropped Dan’s reins, assuming a stance and expression that exposed his determination.
“I don’t care what you say, or do, or believe, Major Stevens. I don’t want to hear any more lies or be involved in your evil games. Our association and relationship are finished. I’m going home, where I belong. If there are any mind-disturbing riddles, you can solve them any way you damn well please. After your treachery and betrayal, I don’t owe you any respect, or loyalty, or explanations. You accused me of horrid crimes and deeds, and you called me vile names. You deluded and humiliated me. You hurt me physically and emotionally. I have no forgiveness or understanding or trust left for you. How could you be capable of such brutality and deception? Why me, Blane?”
Without including the dark reasons from his turbulent past, he explained why he had been afraid to trust her and how his suspicions had been aroused. “These crazy doubts about you intimidate me. Look at the evidence pointing to you, Blue Eyes. What was I supposed to think and feel? How could I ignore it?”
Shannon had pushed herself to her feet. She glared into his entreating expression. “By the same token, Major Stevens, consider all of the incriminating and traitorous evidence pointing to you. Consider, too, how we each dealt with our comparable suspicions and emotions. Suspicions, Major Stevens. Not hard facts,” she stressed.
“Don’t you realize I’m confessing my mistakes? I’m apologizing. I’m trying to explain and clear up this confusion. I’m not perfect. I’m human, fallible, mortal. I’m afraid for you, Shannon. I will be until I discover who’s after you and how they know so much about us.”
“Afraid of me and afraid for me…If those statements were true, you would be in a terrible mess. Let it go, Blane. It won’t work anymore. I can’t believe anything you say or do. You shouldn’t have given yourself away with that signature. You’re far too clever and alert to make such a careless error. Perhaps you assumed I was too stupid to notice it or recall it. If you’re afraid of trusting me to hold silent about you and the Union, dispose of me here and now. If not, get out of my life and sight and let me go my own way.”
“I can’t, Shannon; not tonight or ever. Even when I thought you were guilty, I couldn’t take your life. I couldn’t even sit there and watch you hurt yourself while I was torturing myself for being unable to deal with your alleged treacheries. Help me get to the crux of this affair. At least try to view this situation from my side. I’m a man, Shannon—an ordinary human being. Don’t I have the right to correct my errors, to change and improve my weaknesses and flaws? Are you so cold or perfect that you can’t understand and forgive me?”
She challenged sadly, “See it from your side, Blane? There shouldn’t be any conflicting sides between us. I thought we were a perfect team, not perfect people. I thought we had something special and honest developing between us. I was mistaken about you and us. This isn’t a simple error that can be easily or quickly corrected. The fact that you thought I was guilty of such horrid crimes and acted on those flimsy doubts proves there is nothing unique or valuable between us. Or at most it must be something so weak and meaningless it isn’t worth saving.”
“You can’t believe that, woman, not after what we’ve shared and endured together. Give me time to prove you’re wrong to turn away from me. Stay with me, Shannon. I need you, Blue Eyes. For myself only,” he clarified hoarsely, taking a few steps toward her.
Shannon retreated the same number of steps. “You’re wrong again, Blane, if you think I don’t feel that way. Obviously our emotions and thoughts vary greatly. Time would be useless, Blane; it wouldn’t change anything. Don’t you see? I didn’t turn away from you; you cruelly and savagely rejected me, and I won’t return to endure more agony. As for needing me, you don’t and never will, other than for a pleasing diversion or a defensive cover for your missions. The Blade provides all you want or need. I’m tired. Please go away.”
“Can I ask you one question, Shannon?” He continued even before hearing her response. “During all of these months, especially these past weeks and days, did you never once doubt me? Never once try to deceive me? Never once try to escape me? Never once question your own feelings and mine? Never once give me reason to mistrust you?”
Shannon looked him in the eye as she responded, “Yes, Blane, I did all of those things, with just cause. But I never betrayed you, or humiliated you, or accused you of vile deeds, or tried to kill you.”
“Don’t you realize there are vast differences in our backgrounds. Shannon. Most of my life I’ve been a loner and a fighter of some kind. I had to become self-contained, depending on my instincts and my wits and my skills. We grew up so differently. I learned to fight and kill and be wary at an early age. Since eighteen, I’ve had to survive on cunning and mettle. Sometimes I survived only because of mistrust.” He smiled. “Then I met you. I’m trying to learn to share, to change my thoughts and feelings, to put someone else first. I’m trying to open up to emotions I didn’t know I had inside me. I have to learn to trust women, particularly you. Years ago I was taught to be cautious around beautiful and daring females. A stunning Comanche creature put this scar on my face after I rescued her miserable hide,” he revealed, rubbing his finger over the area. “Then you come along. Lord, Shannon, emotional lessons are hard and painful. Help me understand myself and our situation. I don’t want to lose you.”
Tears stung her eyes. She was so afraid to trust him, and more afraid not to. She had to remember he was a man, a secret warrior, a man who existed on his immense prowess and keen wits. She had to consider the evidence against her and decide if it justified his behavior. She had to realize he had been battling this war for years, and he had scars added on top of past scars to harden him and to make him leery. “I can’t answer you tonight. I’m too confused and fatigued. Give me time to deliberate my feelings and our problems.”
* * *
For a week they traveled through the countryside of South Carolina, staying clear of towns and Rebel camps. Blane’s caution had increased, for things were getting worse all over the South. He would be glad t
o get her home, for she would be safe in Union-conquered territory. He wisely did not press Shannon, though he made sure she was aware of his presence. They rode double or walked in watchful moods, speaking only when necessary. They slept side by side, on separate bedrolls. They ate from his and her provisions. They both spent hours searching their hearts and observing each other intently.
The weather was getting colder each day. In less than two weeks, it would be Christmas. In a few months, the war would have gone on for four brutal and costly years. Each night, Shannon would snuggle into her bedroll and shiver until exhaustion claimed her. But each day, she was becoming more and more aware of her vanishing doubt and anger toward Blane. She was becoming more and more hungry for his stimulating lips, his comforting embraces, the warmth of his body and smile, the closeness and ease they had shared, the fiery passion that had been denied them for weeks. She hated this estrangement, this close proximity without touching all the ways she yearned to touch.
Two more tormenting days passed. They camped in the midst of several large rocks, which would provide protection from the cold winds and any passing enemies. Dan grazed and watered as if this biting weather meant nothing to him. After Blane and Shannon had completed a meal that nearly finished off their supplies, she sat with her back to a towering rock. Her teeth chattered and her body shuddered.
Blane looked around, then smiled to himself. He told her he would return soon, then disappeared into the trees. Within the hour, he had come and gone many times, carrying leafy branches and stacking them nearby. The pile grew taller and thicker with each trip. Finally, he propped limbs against small trees and bushes in such a manner as to create a shelter against the brisk winds for Dan. Sensing his master’s care and concern, the animal nuzzled Blane’s hand and chest. Dan was content to graze on winter grass in the leafy semicircle; and his owner was content to leave him alone, knowing he could defend himself.
Shannon watched Blane continue his task in another area, which was sealed off by huge rocks on three sides, like a miniature box canyon. Taking heavy branches, he covered the overhead area between the boulders, overlapping the limbs until they formed a barrier against the brisk wind and cold air. He retrieved his sleeping bag and unrolled it beneath the leafy ceiling, then deposited the rest of their belongings at the open end. He skillfully crisscrossed more branches until only a small entrance remained uncovered. He turned and smiled, inviting her to share his snug abode. Shannon’s gaze revealed her qualms about sleeping so close together and in such a secluded and romantic setting.
Blane teased, “It’s mighty cold and windy out there, and getting worse. You want me to pass out your sleeping roll, or do you plan to form a truce and enjoy my hospitality tonight? Hard as it’ll be, I promise I’ll behave myself. You haven’t forgotten how many times we’ve shared bedrolls and kept to ourselves? Come on, Blue Eyes. You know you can trust me. Don’t be obstinate and spiteful.”
After Blane vanished behind the sturdy wall of limbs, Shannon eyed the enticing shelter for several moments. She kept going over his words in the hotel in Charleston and in the marsh. Her mind kept murmuring, If what he said was true…
She stood up and went to the makeshift hut. She hesitated, knowing what would happen if she dared to sleep so near him. But wasn’t that what she wanted? Wasn’t he what she wanted, forever? If she believed there was a possibility that these weeks of mysterious misunderstandings had resulted from an enemy’s interference, she could be losing her love and all of her dreams by refusing to listen and take a chance, or to compromise.
She stepped away from the entrance. If only it wasn’t so frightening to risk her heart and soul on this unpredictable man! If only he hadn’t treated her so savagely in the hotel. His harsh words were hard enough to forget, but his brutal actions were nearly impossible to rationalize or excuse. Was she insane to spurn him? Was she insane if she didn’t? It was so complicated, and her decision could be so very costly.
Blane joined her in the icy breeze. He touched her shoulder and entreated, “Come inside, love. I won’t harm you again. Remember how it was between us. Not just the lovemaking, Blue Eyes, but the fun and the laughter and the talking. It was so good and easy to touch during night or day.” When she did not turn or respond, he asked, “I really made a mess of things for us, didn’t I?”
Shannon turned and met his somber gaze. “Yes, Blane, you did,” she concurred painfully as tears escaped her eyes. “I felt so safe and happy with you. You filled my mind and life and heart. I wanted you and needed you. Now, it’s like…there’s a cold, thick wall between us; and I’m not sure I want to remove it or can remove it. You can’t imagine how much you hurt me that night, or how much you terrified me. When I look at you, doubts and fears attack me. It’s almost as if you did slay me that night, or our relationship. I don’t know you or understand you, Blane. I don’t think it can ever again be like it was. Perhaps that’s the saddest part of all; you destroyed something very rare and beautiful.”
“Don’t close me out, Shannon. I love you. When this war is over, I want you to marry me. Please give us time to find what we had again. I was a bloody fool to let fears birth suspicions. Lord, woman, I was so afraid you wouldn’t be for real, so afraid I couldn’t win you and keep you. This is all new to me, Blue Eyes. Help me adjust to it.”
Shannon stared at him. Had she heard him correctly? “Don’t you realize I’m just as frightened of surrendering to you? Don’t you see what a big risk I’ve been taking? I’ve given you all I have, all I am.”
He captured her face and lowered his until their noses almost touched. “Then give me more, Shannon, or return what you’ve taken back. Give me your love and trust and loyalty. Marry me in Savannah. Marry me and wait there for my return. The Confederacy is folding like a morning glory at high noon. I’ll complete my duty, clear our names, and come home to you. We’re destined to be together.”
Her eyes widened and searched his gaze for a glimmer of jest or deceit.. “Are you serious, Blane?” she questioned in astonishment.
He smiled, then kissed her forehead and nose. “I’ve never been more serious in my life. Miss Shannon Greenleaf of Savannah, will you do me the honor and great pleasure of becoming Mrs. Blane Stevens on Christmas Day? Or no later than New Year’s Day? Does that prove my feelings and intentions, partner?”
Shannon flung herself into his arms and hugged him tightly. After covering his face with kisses, she replied, “Yes, my love, it does and I will. Take me inside. I’m freezing.”
Blane scooped her up in his arms, ducked, and entered their cozy haven. He rapidly sealed the entrance, enclosing them in a dim and fragrant paradise. They undressed swiftly and came together on the bedroll with an urgency born of fiery passion and newly confessed love.
Chapter Nineteen
Shannon and Blane traveled another four days, halting briefly along their journey to rest and to make love. Soon, the war would be over for them and their dreams could be fulfilled. In the midst of such misery, their love gave them hope. Most of the time they concealed themselves from the Confederate regiments heading for Savannah to defend the city against General Sherman or from those retreating to “tend their wounds and attack again,” as they declared loudly to anyone they met along the way.
While seeking a place to cross the Savannah River into Georgia twenty miles above the town, they encountered a small band of wounded men who were being taken to the field hospital near Ridgeland. The men told of their skirmishes near Statesboro. They related horrifying tales of razed towns and plantations, of looting and killing beyond the point of warfare or punishment, of wanton destruction of life and property. They sadly declared there was no stopping Sherman; within two weeks, Georgia would be conquered and devastated almost past survival. They told of how Sherman and his men were planning to trample South Carolina—that “hellhole of secession”—next, then move onward to stamp out rebellion in her sister state before joining forces with Grant to clean out any lingering nests of traitor
s.
Needing information on the war’s path and progress and on any hazards before them, Blane and Shannon were compelled to stick to the roads and to bluff their way past any trouble. Travel was slow with so much activity occuring as the enemy swept through the area. Times were bad, and few questions were being asked, especially of those heading toward the line of fire. The strongholds and supply lines were being wiped out rapidly and thoroughly. Rebels were dying and deserting by the hundreds. The end was coming for the Confederacy, and most knew it or sensed it.
On Wednesday, December 19, Blane and Shannon learned of Hood’s defeat in Nashville the Saturday before by Union officers Schofield and Thomas. News filled the air of incidents in North Carolina, making Shannon glad to be away from that frantic area. Governor Vance had sent the Armory Guards from Fayetteville and forty thousand men from Raleigh to the nearly defenseless Wilmington to cover for those men who were presently serving to defend Savannah, a vital supply port. Four battalions under Colonel Leventhorpe had been assigned to protect the Fort Fisher area. The Junior Reserves and Hampton’s cavalry had been sent to repel Grant’s men, who were attempting to tear out the rail lines at Belfield. Shannon was saddened to think of those young men, practically boys, fighting against twenty thousand wellarmed and experienced Union troops. The weather in that area was reported to be intensely cold.
Blane knew about the planned assault by sea and land on Fort Fisher within the week. The powder ship Louisiana would be sailed against the earthworks and exploded. Once the fort and town were taken and Charleston was conquered, it would all be over for both sides.
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