by Mari Carr
He figured that was why he was still chugging along in this field when so many of his contemporaries had burned out. He took time on the weekends to spend with his family either down in the pub or up in the Collins Dorm.
Unlike the majority of his cousins, he’d opted to merely visit the family’s apartment above the pub from time to time rather than live there. He preferred solitude to a large crowd of people and with each passing year, he got more set in his ways. He’d bought the perfect home, a condo near the pub and on the waterfront, that suited his needs. It was large, quiet, comfortable and his…alone.
As for sex, he knew where to go, who to turn to, to have his physical urges satisfied. Not that he’d taken advantage of that since returning from London. He’d picked up the phone to call Adrienne at least a dozen times since returning to the States. Every single time, he’d hung up before dialing the number.
What was more unusual was he hadn’t answered her calls either. He wasn’t sure why, but every time her name flashed on his screen, he sent her to voice mail.
He hadn’t shared that information with Colm or Padraig or Finn. Partly because he was afraid they would read something into it. Something he still wouldn’t let himself consider too hard.
All of those aspects of his life—work, family, home, sex—were disconnected parts that made up the whole. It worked that way.
Then he’d followed May into her shitty little apartment three nights ago, and everything about his life suddenly felt…wrong.
Empty.
He felt guilty for ever thinking May was too young and inexperienced to do the job, especially when he saw what she was dealing with at home. He’d been hard on her, right from the start, thrusting her into Sally’s role without giving her time to adjust. The word bastard kept drifting through his mind as he recalled seeing dark circles under her eyes during her first few weeks here, thinking she’d come to her senses and realize she wasn’t able to do the job, that she’d quit.
He’d been an asshole, placing the same demands on her that he’d made of Sally, and May had proven herself capable.
What bothered him the most was the understanding that this job was vital to her and her family. It was keeping a roof over their heads, food on the table.
Seeing her life, understanding what she was working for, how much she sacrificed for her family, was humbling indeed.
He felt an overpowering need to… God, to what?
To help her, to shoulder her burdens, to take control.
To be her warrior.
He wasn’t sure where that last thought came from. Probably Pop Pop. The man had made a habit of reminding him what his name meant from the time he was just a kid, and how Lochlan should live up to it. He’d planted a seed, and for the first time in his life, Lochlan was starting to recognize what his grandfather meant.
The problem was, it didn’t matter if he tried to help her. May wouldn’t allow him to do any of that. He’d watched her waver several times over the course of the past few days. Every single time, she pulled herself back together, taking those deep breaths and muttering “I’m fine” to herself.
Her strength was immense. But Lochlan knew that at some point, it wasn’t going to be enough.
His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the door opening. His gaze drifted to the clock on the wall. Nine o’clock on the dot. May was the picture of punctuality.
He listened as she crossed the room, hanging her coat up in a small closet by the door. Then she came into view.
Her hair was pinned back in her usual neat, efficient style. He’d originally thought she wore it that way because it was quick and easy. Now he suspected it was based on her need to be taken seriously, not dismissed as too young or inexperienced.
He wanted to see it down, hanging loose over her shoulders.
She tucked her purse in her desk drawer, then disappeared again. This time, he could hear her making coffee. He still didn’t bother to turn on his computer. Instead, he waited.
A few minutes later, she appeared in his doorway, his favorite mug in one hand, a sheet of paper in the other.
She smiled pleasantly as she crossed the room. “Good morning, Mr. Wallace.” She placed the coffee on his desk, then took her usual seat. “You have a busy schedule today, I’m afraid.”
He studied her face. May looked tired. There were dark circles under her eyes again, and they actually appeared a bit puffy, though she’d tried to conceal that fact with makeup. No doubt sleeping in the smoky apartment the past few nights had bothered them. “Sleep okay?”
“Fine.” She glanced up and paused. “Is your computer not working?”
“It’s working.”
May studied his desk. Every file was closed. He remained in his chair, leaning back, his hands folded in front of him.
“Have you decided to work out of the office today?”
“No. I’ll be here all day.”
She snuck another surreptitious peek at the computer. “Okay. As you know, Mr. Durwood and his people will be here at ten to go over the contracts.”
He’d won the Durwood bid. The man’s business would bring in a fair penny and set AdLoch up for its most profitable year ever.
Regardless, that win wasn’t the one that mattered.
“You called me Mr. Wallace.”
May sighed. “I feel very strongly about maintaining a certain level of professionalism at work. I want to thank you again for everything you did the other night, but I can assure you, from this point on, I can handle—”
“My uncle Killian called this morning. He’s going to send my uncle Sean out to your place this afternoon to see what needs to be done.”
“I looked up your uncle’s company. I don’t get the feeling they do small jobs like the repairs on my apartment.”
Lochlan ignored her comment. May was digging her heels in. She had no idea what she was up against. “I told him we’d meet him there at three.”
“We?”
“Yes. And Lauren is anxious to meet Jenny. She said you haven’t called her yet.”
“I don’t feel right asking her. I would want to pay.”
Lochlan continued as if she hadn’t spoken. “She had an opening for an appointment for next Thursday at four. I assumed that would work, as Jenny should be out of school by then, so I told her you’d take it.”
“I work until five.”
He grinned at her contrary reply, his suspicions about her confirmed. May didn’t have anyone to help her, so she didn’t have a clue how to accept assistance when offered. “You can leave early.”
“No.”
“Yes.”
She frowned. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t appreciate everything you’re doing, but it’s too much.”
Lochlan crossed his arms. “I beg to differ.” He lifted his finger when she started to speak again. “And nothing I’ve just said to you is negotiable. Period. Now,” he turned to fire up his computer, “as you said, Durwood will be here soon, so let’s take the next hour to make sure we have everything we need for the ten o’clock meeting.”
May looked like she wanted to argue, but she didn’t. He knew she felt enough guilt about leaving work to deal with the fire that she would yield. He also knew he was in good shape for the meeting, something that became apparent to May about thirty minutes after they’d started setting things up.
She accompanied him to the meeting, taking notes, which went just as well as he’d anticipated.
May ate lunch at her desk, typing up the meeting summary, and he spent the better part of the afternoon with his lawyer, discussing the contracts.
However, Lochlan kept an eye on the clock, aware that they would need to leave here by two forty-five in order to meet Uncle Sean at her apartment.
“May, can you run this report…” He stopped speaking when he looked up and realized May wasn’t at her desk. Lochlan stood, his muscles stiff from sitting so long, and decided he’d deliver the report to the CFO’s office. The shor
t walk would do him good.
He was halfway through the large central office space when he heard May’s voice.
“I’m fairly certain Mr. Wallace wouldn’t approve of you organizing a betting pool if you didn’t include him, Tom.”
He chuckled, ducking behind a cubicle so she wouldn’t know he was there. Lochlan was a Collins, through and through, which meant there weren’t too many bets he wouldn’t take. May had figured that out quickly.
“Hey, May,” Trixie Watkins called out. “Here’s that birthday card for Ronald. I got everyone in my department to sign it.”
“Terrific. I think you guys were the last ones. The cake will be delivered tomorrow at lunchtime.”
“Chocolate?” Trixie asked.
“Is there any other kind?” May replied with a light laugh.
Another voice entered the conversation. “Hey, did Lochlan have a chance to look at that report I sent over yesterday?”
“Not yet, Bill. He was wrapped up all morning with the Durwood contracts. It’s the next thing on his to-do list. I promise I’ll make sure he gets to it today.”
“Thanks, May.”
Lochlan didn’t mean to shadow her as she made her way across the office, chatting with several people, asking questions of some, dealing with problems for others, but he was interested in seeing her work. She was efficient, friendly, and clearly well-liked.
She turned the corner into the bank of cubicles where he was hiding and spotted him.
He attempted to cover up for his stalking. “There you are. I was looking for you.”
“Do you need something?”
Lochlan held up the file in his hand. “I was going to ask you to deliver this to Ron’s office, but since I’m almost there, I’ll drop it off myself.”
“Okay. I was taking care of a few things out here. I’m about to head back to my desk.”
“I’ve got a couple of items to discuss with Ron. I’ll try to make it quick, so we can head out to your place.”
She glanced around, clearly uncomfortable with his comment. No one was around, but it was obvious she didn’t want to discuss her personal affairs in the common area where they could be overheard. “Fine,” she said softly, then continued to make her way back to the office, stopping to answer a question about sick leave.
His chat with Ron took longer than he’d intended, so he cut it short, intent on grabbing May so they could meet Sean.
“It’s two forty-five,” he said as he entered the office.
May looked up in surprise as Lochlan approached her desk. “Actually, I took care of things so we don’t have to be there. My mother is at the apartment. I told her your uncle was coming. There’s no need for either of us to leave work. He can take a look around and email me an estimate.”
She made a good point, but Lochlan had wanted to pull Sean aside to covertly ask him about making repairs to more than just the kitchen. Her apartment was in bad shape. He’d noticed a cracked window, warped flooring in the living room and several places where the drywall was crumbling. He was also sure that the hallway and small dining area outside the kitchen were going to need a fresh coat of paint as well, thanks to smoke damage.
And all of that was just in the places he’d seen. He hadn’t gotten a glimpse of the bedrooms or bathroom.
May had mentioned trying to save up to get a better place, and he knew she wouldn’t accept his help in moving sooner, despite the fact his future brother-in-law, Lucas Whiting, owned more properties than Hilton had hotels. Which meant he’d like to at least make her current apartment livable.
He’d place a call to Sean later. “I’ll concede the trip to your place on one condition.”
“What’s that?”
“You drop that Mr. Wallace crap once and for all.”
“Fine.”
He chuckled. “Just like that?”
“Would you have ever given up on the request?”
He shook his head.
“Then, yeah, just like that.” She smiled and turned back to her computer. “Now, if you don’t mind, Lochlan, I have work to do.”
Lochlan had expected her capitulation to please him. Instead, the response was something stronger, less controllable.
He sucked in a deep breath and returned to his office. He needed to put some distance between them before he did something rash and irresponsible. He had told himself he was helping her because she was a good employee in need.
He was lying to himself.
Lochlan texted Sean to tell him May’s mother would be there to meet him, then tried to read through the financial report his accountant had dropped off earlier, but he found it impossible to concentrate.
May had been with him just over two months. Two months, and already he was feeling the overwhelming desire to toss out every rule he’d ever lived by.
But he couldn’t. She needed her job, needed the salary and—unbeknownst to her at the moment—the health insurance plan he was setting up to include her nieces and her mother.
A short time later, his cell phone rang, and he glanced at the number. He grinned when he saw Sean’s name. Lochlan spun his chair toward the windows and lowered his voice.
“Hey, man. Good to hear from you. So what’s the damage?”
“Lochlan, I’m at the hospital.”
“What? Why?”
“When I got to May’s place, no one answered. The door was unlocked, so I was concerned. There’s no security system in the building. I found her mom in the bathroom, on the floor, in a lot of pain.”
Lochlan stood up and turned back toward May’s desk. She wasn’t there. She must’ve gone to the ladies’ room or out to one of the other offices to pick up some paperwork.
“Did you call an ambulance?”
“No. She wouldn’t let me. Said it was too expensive. She didn’t even want to go to the hospital, but I convinced her. Carried her down three flights of stairs and drove her here. ER doctor just took her back.”
“Are you at Hopkins?”
“Yeah.”
“May and I will meet you there. Thanks for everything, Sean.”
“Meet him where?” May asked, walking into the office with a stack of folders.
“The hospital. It’s Linda.”
“Oh my God!” May spun around, racing toward her desk drawer to retrieve her purse. “What happened?” she called out as she did so.
“I don’t know,” Lochlan said as they walked to the elevator together. He texted as he spoke, asking the valet to bring his car to the front. “Said she was on the bathroom floor in a lot of pain.”
He spotted the briefest moment of panic on her face before she willed it away, sucked it down. Lochlan got the impression May was a master of suppressing her emotions, but those things weren’t going to stay buried forever. Somewhere down the road, she was likely to explode.
“It’s going to be fine,” May muttered. Lochlan noticed she did that when she was stressed out, gave herself these little reassuring speeches.
He grasped her hand and squeezed it. “It is going to be fine.”
She tugged her hand away from his, even though they were alone. “I’m so sorry. I’m making us leave work again.”
He frowned at her apology. The elevator opened on the garage level and, mercifully, the valet was just pulling up with his car. May raced to the passenger’s side, climbing in before he could reach for the door to open it for her.
Lochlan hopped in and put the Audi in gear, heading toward the hospital. He prayed they didn’t hit a lot of traffic.
May glanced at the time. “The girls.” She reached for her phone, then paused as if thinking.
“What time do they get out of school?”
May seemed to be struggling. “They’re probably just now getting on the bus. Takes them half an hour to get home. No one’s there. I need…um…shit…”
“Hang on.” Lochlan dialed his cell. “Hey, Yvonne. Can you do me a huge favor? The two little girls who were with me at the restaurant the
other night are on the bus heading home from school. Sean is with May’s mom at the hospital, and no one is there to get them. They’ve met you before, so I was hoping you could pick them up and take them back to the pub for a little while. Maybe you can park them in front of the TV up in the dorm with whoever’s home. Just until we see what’s up with May’s mother.”
He smiled when he heard Yvonne’s keys rattle.
“What’s the address?” Yvonne asked.
He gave it to her. Then Yvonne promised to break every traffic law to get there before them. “Thanks, Vonnie. I owe you one.” He disconnected the call. “She’s on her way. You think the girls will be okay with her?” he asked.
May nodded. “Yeah. Chloe asked just this morning if we could eat Irish again tonight.”
“Then she’s getting her wish.”
“You said she could park them in the dorm?”
“Silly name my family has for the apartment some of my cousins share above the pub. It’s where my mom grew up with her parents and siblings. Always two or three Collinses kicking around up there. They’ll keep the girls safe and sound until we get back.”
May fell silent, her hands clenched in her lap. He watched her close her eyes, taking deliberate, deep breaths. The night of the fire, he’d admired her ability to pull herself together, to remain calm.
Today, for some reason, it was pissing him off.
They traveled the rest of the way in silence. Lochlan found a parking spot close to the ER entrance, and he grabbed her hand as the two of them walked into the waiting room. He spotted Sean instantly. His uncle was hard to miss. Like Lochlan, Sean was blessed with the same large frame as most of the other men in their family. They were a bunch of big, burly dudes, according to Riley.
“Sean,” Lochlan said, guiding May toward his uncle. “This is May. May, this is my uncle Sean.”
They shook hands.
“Thank you so much for bringing her here. Do you know where she is?”
“They pushed her back to an examining room about twenty minutes ago. I haven’t seen or talked to anyone since. Oh wait,” Sean pointed to a door opening, “that’s the doctor.”
