by Angela Blake
“We need to monitor you for 24 hours to make sure nothing untoward happens.”
“But…haven’t you done all the tests you need to?” Tane had protested, wanting to be home in his own bed.
“We did. But some results take longer than others to come through. In the meantime we would be obliged if you allowed us to watch you for the next 24 hours.”
Tane was totally against it and his father agreed that it probably wasn’t necessary. But Nikora would not hear of him leaving the hospital without the doctor’s all clear. Tane understood her fears. She had just lost both her parents after all. Clearly she could not chance losing anyone else. So he indulged her in her wishes, staying up to play cards with her before agreeing to rest just to put her mind at ease.
But he could not shut off his mind or stop going over his father’s revelations.
He was a merman.
He had gills, a tail and fins.
No matter how many times he repeated it in his head, it didn’t begin to make the slightest bit of sense. It sounded like pure madness.
And yet.
It felt true.
Like a piece of him had been missing and now he’d gotten it back.
***
“I want to meet them,” he said as he came to a stop a few feet from where his father was mending a broken fishing net in the sand.
“Meet who?” he asked absentmindedly, fingers working industriously, a small frown of concentration on his face.
“My people. Our people.”
Tipene stopped what he was doing to regard Tane curiously, “Why?” he asked.
“Because I need to see to believe.”
Tipene straightened up, getting to his feet in one smooth motion, “What does that mean? You already saw. What else is there to see?”
“They’re part of my heritage dad. I want to meet them.”
Tipene sighed, “It’s not that simple.”
“Why not?”
“Because the mers despise anyone who gave up their tail for legs. They will not welcome you with open arms.”
Tane nodded, “I get that. But I still need to see.” He said.
Tipene regarded him intently for a few minutes before nodding back, “I will see what can be arranged,” he said.
***
“Hey stranger.”
Tane looked down from on top of the rock he was sitting on watching the sea to see Livy standing below him, hands on hips, squinting up at him.
“Hey yourself,” he said. So much had happened since their encounter after his grand parents’ funeral that it felt like another lifetime ago. He knew it wasn’t though. And he knew Livy didn’t think of it like that. He just didn’t want to deal with it right now. He had so much else going on.
“So are we going to talk about it or what?” Livy said right on cue.
Tane was silent, staring toward the horizon. He thought about maybe feigning ignorance about what she was talking about. But he couldn’t quite do that to her.
“Do we have to?” he asked instead.
She looked down, her toe tracing patterns in the sand, “I would like to talk about it. What about you?”
Tane shrugged, “I’d rather not to be honest. I have so much on my mind right now.”
She hunched over, looking like she was protecting herself from a physical blow, “I see…would what is on your mind involve how you survived under water for fifteen minutes?”
The question threw him; it rather came out of left field.
“Uh, was it fifteen minutes?” he asked.
“Possibly longer. It felt like forever from the shore, waiting for your head to pop up out of the water.”
Tane turned to look her in the eye with a small smile, “I’m fine Livy. Really.” He said.
Chapter Five: It’s Really Complicated
“Please don’t push me away,” Livy said as she began to climb the rock. Tane sighed inwardly. He really didn’t have time for this.
“Um, Livy would you mind? I really want to be by myself right now.”
Livy froze, one foot planted on a natural step in the rock the other straight behind her as if she was on her mark.
Her hands clinging to the rock.
Tane tensed. She looked pretty precarious like she might topple backward at any moment. He watched with bated breath as she backtracked to the bottom of the rock. He only relaxed when she had both feet on the ground. That was when he noticed that her face was scrunched in on itself, eyes down, lips trembling.
“Livy…” he sighed, not having the emotional reserves to comfort her as she swept her lashes up to look at him, eyes brimming with hurt and rejection, “I’m sorry…” he said.
She spread her lips in a parody of a smile, “Don’t hurt yourself Tane,” she said and turned away, walking quickly down the beach. He watched her go with a heavy feeling in his chest.
“God, I can’t do anything right these days can I?” he said to himself.
***
It was three days before his father came to him as he lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling, unable to sleep. It had been a long day at the lawyers getting acquainted with his drastic change in fortune. He was now the proud owner of several properties in and around Hawaii as well as a minor shareholder in several corporations around the country. He was also the new master at Wilkins mansion as well as heir to various club memberships countrywide. It was a lot to take in, but one thing he’d made sure to do right away is to ensure that salaries were still being paid on time for the Wilkins’ personal staff. He had a long meeting with his grandparents’ money manager who went through the accounts with him as comprehensively as possible. Tane was so glad he’d opted to take Intro to Accounting in his last semester otherwise he’d have been truly lost instead of simply overwhelmed. His mother was a great help and surprisingly – to Tane – more knowledgeable about business management than he knew. Tipene had stayed out of it – he told Tane he’d rather use the time to initiate contact with the mers in order to facilitate a visit.
“There are merpeople on these shores?” Tane asked with surprise, “how come I’ve never seen them.”
His father just looked at him like he’d said the silliest thing Tipene had ever heard.
“Be ready to go on Saturday. I’ve told your mother we’re taking a trip to clear your head,” Tipene said from Tane’s doorway. Tane sat up on his bed, staring at his father.
“And she’s okay with that?” he asked.
“She’s fine with it. She understands the need to get away.”
Tane sighed, “I hate lying to her. I hate having to lie to anyone.” He said.
Tipene stepped into the room shutting the door behind him, “You mean you hate lying to Livy.”
Tane said nothing.
Tipene sat down on the edge of his bed with a sigh, “its hard son. I know from experience. When you love someone you want to share every bit of yourself with them.”
“I’m not in love with Livy,” Tane protested.
Tipene nodded indulgently but his expression was skeptical, “Well…okay but she definitely has some strong feelings for you. I suspect she always has.”
“How would you know? You were never home,” Tane said lashing out without meaning to.
“Yes, I was away a lot, but when I was here, I was present. I noticed everything about you. You were – and are – the most important thing in my life.” He said.
Tane felt his cheeks flush with embarrassment. He wanted to apologize to his father but there was something stubborn inside him that wouldn’t let him, “What about mom?” he said instead.
“Your mother is a part of me. She is my heart and soul.”
“And yet you won’t tell her that you’re not fully human.”
Tipene looked down, shoulders drooping with sadness, “If I told her, the mers would kill her.”
Tane stiffened, sitting up even straighter, “I beg your pardon?” he squeaked.
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Tipene looked up, meeting his eyes, “That’s part of the deal with Tangaroa. I get my two legs and my ability to walk on land. But no one must know. If I told anyone, it would be an automatic death sentence.”
Tane was breathing hard, head spinning with this new information, “But…I didn’t make that deal. I didn’t make any deals. It’s not my fault I was born this way!”
“Yes but is telling your secret worth the risk? Will you risk Livy’s life, or your mother’s?”
Tane flopped back against the headboard, pouting like a sulky child, “I never said I was gonna tell.” He said.
Tipene nodded, “Good boy. I’ll let you get some rest. Try to put this out of your mind for now.” He stood up, heading for the door as he said it. Tane nodded his agreement and his father left, closing the door softly behind him.
“As if I could,” Tane mumbled to himself as he burrowed under his covers.
***
Saturday came too fast yet seemed to take forever. Tane vacillated between excitement at getting some answers and pure fear of what awaited him. Would he be able to breathe underwater again? Or was it just some freak accident? Three quarters of the time he had difficulty believing any of it was real. He ran his hands down his thighs feeling for scales but no, his skin was smoother than a baby’s butt.
He also avoided Livy as much as possible even though she was currently living at her parents’ cottage and would still come to the beach for a swim every evening, just like she and her sister used to do. Tane always made sure he was occupied elsewhere. There was a lot to do concerning the Wilkins’ estate. He also found that he was suddenly very popular with the local country club crowd. They’d never paid him much mind before – he’d always been the loner kid who went to public school with the rest of the hoi polloi despite who his grandparents were. But now he was the heir to a multi-billion dollar fortune and everyone wanted to be his friend.
Tane didn’t know what to do with his new found status. He had so much going on that it felt like a completely unnecessary distraction. But his new friends were persistent and hard to get rid of. They were also a convenient excuse to stay away from Livy. He knew he was building himself a pyramid scheme of consequences but he didn’t have the presence of mind to deal with it.
He greeted Saturday morning with relief, picking up the backpack he’d packed to throw wool over his mother’s eyes about this trip. Where they were going, they would not be needing bags, but Tipene also had a full bag packed and as they walked out to the car, his mother fussed over them both.
“Have y’all carried toothbrushes? Your satellite phone is charged right?” she said.
As far as she knew, they were going hiking up the Haleakala Mountain. She wasn’t happy about it but at the same time she agreed that it would probably do Tane a world of good to get out of his head for a while. Her hand landed on Tipene’s shoulder in soft caress.
“I’m glad you’re doing this with him,” she whispered softly, “Keep our son safe.”
Tipene kissed her warm and gently on the lips, “You know I will E ku'u aloha.”
Nikora smiled and stepped back from him, giving Tane a long hug as Tipene put their bags away in the back of the jeep.
“I’ll keep him safe too mama,” Tane whispered, kissing her on the cheek.
She let him go and they got into the car and drove away. They had decided to park the car at a special cove Tipene knew about and cover it in tarp. It was not visible from the road and the car would only be seen if someone was looking from the sea. That part of the shore was too rocky to attract boating activity and too shallow for ships. So their car would stay safe and undetected until they got back.
“Is it far from here? Where we’re going?”
“It’s almost two day’s swim from here,” Tipene said.
“Two days? What happens if we get tired?”
Tipene turned to him, “Think of it like going for a hike. We get tired, we stop and rest.”
“Yeah but…where?”
Tipene laughed, “There are plenty of rocks and crevices to sit upon, on the sea bed.”
“Will we be swimming down that deep?”
Tipene shook his head, “It’s a whole different world down there Tane. Different than what you’re expecting. So just follow me, try not to worry and remember that I would never let anything hurt you.”
“I mean of course I know that dad. It’s just…”
“I know son. It’s the unknown, it’s scary. Of course you want to know what you’re getting into. But trust me okay. It’ll be fine.”
Tane nodded slowly, still anxious and worried but willing to believe that his father would not steer him wrong.
“Are we taking our clothes off?” Tane asked.
“Yes. We can keep them on but the water would just ruin them. I have the scuba suits we can use.”
“Oh, okay cool. What about food?”
“The sea is full of things we can eat Tane. How do you think fish stay alive?”
“Ugh, raw stuff? Seaweed? Raw fish? I’ve never liked sushi dad.”
Tipene laughed, “Don’t worry. We’ll find something you like.”
“Can’t I just stuff a PB and J in a waterproof bag?”
Tipene’s laughter rang out louder, “You do what you have to son.” He said divesting himself of his clothes. Tane imitated him, shivering a bit in the cool breeze blowing from the sea. Tipene threw him a suit and he put it on at once then followed his father as he dived into the water.
He was surprised to find that he could see quite clearly once he was submerged. He could feel his gills opening up, even as he had to overcome the sensation of drowning he was feeling. He knew, intellectually that he was breathing fine. But being in the water so long was giving him déjà vu, or PTSD. He wasn’t sure which applied. His father paused, turning to watch Tane swim towards him. It calmed him down a bit, slowed his heartbeat to see his father so at home in the water.
‘I can do this,’ he thought, letting the fear go. He flapped his feet…fin…whipping his head around to see that his swim suit had shredded to give way to a purple and gold tail fin, flapping up and down. He had turned. The light hit his scales in a way that gave off a curious rainbow effect and for a while he was riveted by the luminescence of his own body. They discarded the rest of their scuba suits.
‘Don’t get so lost in yourself you lose your way,’ Tane startled, hearing his father’s words in his mind. He turned to stare open mouthed at his father, eyes wide, eyebrows raised.
‘Yes. This is how we talk in the water. How the whales talk. We communicate mind to mind.’
‘God dad. Half the time I feel like I’m going crazy.’
‘You’re not Tane. Don’t worry.’
Tane closed his eyes, counting his breaths as she tried to reduce his anxiety. His fear and surprise at everything that was going on. It was almost overwhelming. Sensory overload.
‘One step at a time son. One step at a time.’
Tane nodded, trying to wrap his head around all these changes. His father swum away and Tane followed him.
Chapter Six: Into the Deep
They traveled for a day and a half before Tane asked for a rest. His father found a pair of rocks for them to sit on before pulling out two pieces of weed and placing round white pieces of something on them. He handed one of the seaweeds to Tane and then took a bite of his own white square. Tane took a tentative bite of his, and was surprised to find it quite delicious.
‘Mmm. This is good.’ He thought at his father.
‘Don’t sound so surprised.’ Tipene replied.
Tane grinned, still surprised that he could do that without drowning.
‘Let’s get moving. I want to reach the lands before nightfall.’
‘Lands?’
‘Yeah. That’s what we call our home.’
‘Cool. Let’s get going.’
Tane got up from the rock, surprised to find t
hat his energy was boosted by the small meal they’d had.
‘What was that thing we ate anyway?’
‘It’s a kind of cake made up of various ingredients including sea urchin, sea weed and maybe whale droppings.’
Tane began to gag, ‘I beg your pardon?’
Tipene laughed, ‘Kidding!’
***
Six hours later the water they were swimming in became opaque all around them and Tipene stopped swimming. Tane stopped too, eyes on his father. He was afraid he might lose him in the murkiness of the water. He wondered what that was about; pollution maybe? He had read somewhere that there was an entire planet of garbage beneath the sea.
Tipene stayed unmoving, facing the wall of opacity in front of them. Tane moved closer, to stand next to his father.
‘Are we there yet?’ he asked.
A subterranean vibration went through his father, something like laughter and Tane gave him a sideways glance filled with amusement. Then he jumped back in shock because in the microsecond that he looked away, there was now a…mer…standing in front of them. He was tall; taller than Tane who stood at six four on land and taller than his father. The mer also had a spear in his hand, his face closed and hostile looking.
‘Tipene, you come for what?’ he said.
His father took a step forward, effectively standing between Tane and the mer, ‘I bring my son that he may know his people.’
The mer peered around Tipene, looking Tane up and down. He seemed distinctly unimpressed with what he saw but he didn’t actively chase them away so Tane counted it as a win. Next thing he knew the mer was stepping back, turning back into the murkiness and disappearing from sight.
‘Well…that went well,’ Tane said his thought thick with sarcasm.
“Yep. It did.’ Tipene said placidly. He continued to stand and watch the wall of opacity, seemingly unmoved by the cold reception they’d just received. Suddenly there was a scream and Tane jumped as his father tensed. Then there was a blur as someone ran out of the mist and Tane watched in confusion as they tackled Tipene, almost making him fall over despite the water buffeting him. Tane didn’t know if he should go and help his dad or not. He saw Tipene’s hands come up and envelope the figure in his arms, who was still screaming or crying or something. The uproar went on for a while, long enough for Tane to realize that the mer was not in fact trying to fight his father. They were hugging.
