To the right of the page, beneath a picture that looked more like the man I’d met in the airport than the way he looked now, was a bar with background facts. And I nearly choked when I saw that under "partners" it listed Valerie Stern (1984 − 1988) above Elizabeth Walton-Elwood (2007 – 2012)
Stern? As in... Elwood & Stern? Another check of the dates made my stomach churn. Was his business partner Emma's mother?
That was it. Obsessive, stalkery Googling took over the rest of my day. I learned that Neil had first worked for the British arm of his now deceased father's media corporation before breaking out on his own to work for... Richard Branson. And oh, look, there was a photo of Neil and Richard Branson, at some black tie event in the 90's. Standing next to Paul McCartney. I also learned that Neil was the tenth richest Brit, owing to his shares in his father’s media and property management companies in Iceland. His estimated net worth was 6.5 billion British pounds.
And I had argued with him over paying for room service.
I shut my laptop and set it gently aside, as if it were some highly unstable compound.
There was a knock at my door, and Holli called, "You can stop hiding in there out of politeness, she's gone."
"I wasn't hiding," I told her as I opened the door. "I was giving you some space. I thought you weren't going to see her again."
"I was undecided." Holli followed me to the bed and sat on the edge while I flopped across it sideways.
Staring up at the crack in the plaster above my bed, I set my billionaire problem aside for a moment. "Are you any closer to a decision on her?"
Holli considered, scooting back and pulling her legs up criss-cross. "I like her. I'll definitely see her again. But let's not go picking out toasters to put on the registry."
I grinned and teased, "Holli and Deja sittin' in a tree..."
"What about you? Two consecutive nights. You never stay the night. And getting caught by his daughter!" Her jaw dropped. "Please tell me she did not walk in - "
"No! But it was bad enough. She heard everything. She totally hates me now." I gestured guiltily to my laptop. "Then I come home and find out, oh, Neil is not only like, a billionaire with his own company, but yeah, he's a knight and he hangs out with a Beatle every now and then."
"Yikes. But... according to Deja, you should be in there with him." Holli bit her thumbnail. "I didn't tell her, by the way. She brought it up on her own."
"What do you mean 'in there?'" I snorted. "We've had sex, I've already closed that deal."
"I... don’t think it’s just sex for him, Soph. Deja said that he asked about you several times while he was in England. Always trying to see how you were doing in the new job and stuff, making it sound like he cared about you as an employee, but still. She thinks the dude is in love with you."
"No, definitely not." I forced myself to kill the goofy smile I felt coming on. Like, strangle it with my bare hands kill it. I did not need to start drawing hearts and flowers around his name in my notebook. "Neither of us are in a place to pursue anything serious."
The memory of that Wikipedia page flashed through my mind. He'd been with Valerie Stern for three years, married to his wife for two, although they’d apparently dated for a few. Was that as long term as he got?
Why did that bother me?
Of course, he'd promised we'd stay friends even if we stopped sleeping together. Had he made the same promise to Valerie? Was that why they were in business together? Or had that been a do-the-right-thing move, giving the mother of his child a job after he cut out on her?
"Ugh!" I pulled my pillow over my face so I could scream into it and kick my legs in childish frustration. Sitting up I groaned, "I keep assigning him all these sinister emotional motives for practically everything he does. Like, 'Oh, he's doing this because he's a bad father,' and 'Oh, he's doing that because he feels guilty about his ex.' Why can't I just like him?"
"Because you really, really like him," Holli said with a pitying smile. "You're trying to find ways to avoid liking him. That's the first sign."
"Oh, like you with your 'undecided' on Deja?" I blew out a long, exasperated breath. "You're right though. I love him. I am in love with the guy I started a casual relationship with, and I'm afraid of what that means."
Holli shrugged. "Why does it have to be mean anything? You love him. Great. But you don't want to get married and do the happy family thing, you've always been pretty clear on that, right?"
"Yeah," I conceded. "I don't see myself cut out for that kind of life."
"So, you love him. Enjoy the time you're spending with him. If it turns into something more, then it does. If it doesn't, well... you're with him right now. Just roll with it."
"How can you say something I've already said to myself, and make it sound ten thousand times smarter?" It was true. A lot of the time, the voice of reason in my head was just Holli's voice calling me a dumb ass. "I guess I just don't like the thought that he might not feel the same way about me."
"Um, he feels the same way. Trust me. If Deja picked up on it, then he’s into you.” Holli stood and stretched. "I'm gonna take a shower, and then I'm having lunch with my agent. On a Sunday, so you know it's good news, if it couldn’t wait until tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed, okay?"
I held up both my hands, giving her a total of four sets of crossed fingers. "Consider them crossed."
At least one of us should have something awesome happen in our career, I mused as I reached for my laptop again. As soon as the screen blinked on, I closed the browser window. I didn't need to know any more. Holli was right, I wasn't in this relationship because I wanted some traditional romantic fairytale. I was seeing him because we were great together in bed, and we got along as people. And so what if he had some big, impressive past? All the awesome shit he'd done in his life had happened after twenty-four. I was twenty-four right now, so there was no reason I should feel inadequate just because I didn't have a legend of British rock on speed dial. I wasn't going to worry about how different we were. I was just going to enjoy being with him.
Chapter Sixteen
I went to work on Monday morning feeling really great about the positive direction things had taken. I'd been promoted - on my own merit and not, as I had feared, because of who I'd slept with - and despite the current cluster fuck going on in the beauty department, we were actually doing okay. We'd found a really cool, under-recognized beauty brand we'd made the focus of the hastily overhauled January spread, and even though it had put us behind on February, the sky wasn't falling like it had been during my first week.
Unfortunately, working in the same building as Neil and not seeing him was psychological torture. I felt like an obsessed middle-schooler, which I really didn't like. I forced myself to focus, and worked so I was away from the door. I didn't want to catch myself looking up every ten seconds, trying to get a glimpse of him on the off chance he was walking through the main floor.
The only way Neil and I were going to be able to continue our relationship outside of work was if I could keep concentrating on my job. Which is why when I went to his office at the beginning of my lunch hour, it had nothing to do with us dating, and everything to do with Holli and Deja dating.
After seeing the two of them together in the apartment, I'd decided that I had to meddle. Just lightly. Just to give Deja a hint. Because from what I'd discerned from our past six years of friendship, dating Holli was like trying to solve the puzzle box from Hellraiser. Deja was doing me a solid by not blowing the whistle on my extracurricular fun times with Neil, so I owed her a solid right back.
"Hey, Mr. Elwood isn't here," Deja said, looking up from her computer when I pushed through the door.
"That's okay. I'm not here to see Mr. Elwood, I'm here to see you." It was still super bizarre to be back in this office, standing in front of the desk I'd worked behind for two years. I looked over to the empty desk across the room. "Still no second assistant?"
"No, I don't really think he needs one," Dej
a said tapping a button on her keyboard before swiveling her chair to face me. "Either he's not demanding enough, or I'm the most capable assistant in the universe."
"I bet it's the second one."
She gave a little laugh, but I could tell she was eager to talk about Holli. Her eyebrows shot up, and she smiled a big, unnatural smile. "So... how's Holli?"
"Good, she's good." I nodded, my lips clamped together as I tried to figure out how to say what I wanted to tell her. "Look, I think you guys could be really good together. But there's something you should know."
"Oh?" she asked warily, her smile fading a little. "Did I do something wrong?"
"Well...” I took a breath. "Holli is really, really sensitive about her weight."
Deja laughed in disbelief. "Um, she weighs about two pounds! I wish I was so skinny."
"I know, and that's the problem." I'd lived with Holli since freshman year at college, so I'd had plenty of time to see how the well-meaning comments of strangers had affected her. I really hoped I could make Deja understand in a few minutes what it had taken me years to learn. "She gets a lot of crap for being so skinny. People get snotty with her and accuse her of having an eating disorder, or they give her a bunch of praise for her willpower. She just gets tired of it. The truth is, it's just how her body is. She has as much trouble gaining weight as most people do losing weight. Then you get a bunch of jealous people taking digs at her, and there's no way she can win."
"Oh my god." Deja looked slightly ill. "And here I was, all weekend with my stupid, 'Oh, I'm so jealous of you, you can eat whatever you want, I wish my thighs didn't touch, blah blah blah.'" She dropped her head into her hands. "Deja you fucking idiot."
"No, look, don't beat yourself up." I felt kind of bad, though I didn't know why. If I were routinely offending someone, I would definitely want to be told, and I was sure Deja appreciated hearing this. "She really likes you. And I think you guys would be so great together. Just, in this case, an apology might go a long way."
"Will do," she assured me. "Thank you."
"I'm about to go grab some lunch. Do you want me to bring anything back for you?"
Deja shook her head. "No, I've got this avocado wrap thing in the fridge. Go, have a good one."
As I turned to leave, Neil came through the door, followed by Hope. He looked startled to see me there. "Hello, Sophie."
"Hello, Mr. Elwood. I was just on my way out." I passed him and nodded at Hope. "Hello."
"Getting along alright in the beauty department, dear?" Hope asked. She was about one hundred percent more pleasant now that she wasn't working with Gabriella.
"Things are going great. A few bumps, but it's going great." I nodded at her and Neil, catching his eyes super briefly before I headed through the door. I'd just made it to the lobby when my phone vibrated with a text message from Neil.
That skirt is driving me insane.
I smirked to myself as I exited the building. I was hoping he'd noticed my floaty green skirt beneath the hem of my short white wool coat. I had definitely started to dress with an eye to what Neil would find attractive. Nothing inappropriate for the work place, still fashionable, but I'd figured out early that he was pretty into skirts. A flash of our night in the hotel six years previous came to me, his hand gripping the back of my waistband and roughly jerking down my jeans. A hot flush suffused my body, starting at my torso and spreading to my limbs. Okay, so maybe the clothes didn’t matter. Maybe he was just into me.
"Hey, Sophie!"
I startled guiltily. I wasn't even twenty feet from the front door and I was thinking inappropriate-for-the-office thoughts. When I turned, Jake was jogging down the steps to catch up with me.
"You going to lunch?" he asked, stepping to the curb to hail a taxi.
"Yeah," I said, not adding the part about going on my own. Ever since his little tantrum in the conference room the other day, I'd been avoiding Jake. It was a lot easier to do, now that I was in beauty. To him, my department was a frivolous joke, around just to pad out the magazine's advertising. He hadn’t called or asked how the job was panning out. I was surprised he even deigned to speak to me anymore.
"Mind if I tag along? I've got something I want to run by you." The cab he'd signaled stopped at the curb and he opened the door for me.
Gritting my teeth, I smoothed my skirt down and swung my legs in, thighs firmly together. Jake got in beside me and gave the driver the name of an incredibly pretentious sushi place that was currently the rage among the elite at Porteras.
Fucker didn't even ask me if I wanted sushi.
He turned to me and flashed the big smile he reserved for when he wanted something. When I’d first come to Porteras, that smile had given me a little crush on him. Once I’d learned he had a girlfriend, I’d firmly resolved not to crush on him. Now that I’d seen how moody and weird he could be, I wasn’t as jealous of Amanda anymore.
His eyes dipped to my bare legs before returning quickly to my face. "I just wanted to touch base with you. Find out if you're still happy working for Porteras."
What a strange question. We'd always been chummy at work, but he'd never seemed overly concerned about my career. We usually always talked about his. "Um, I just got a great promotion. Why wouldn't I be happy?"
He nodded, still smiling, and chuckled like we were sharing some private joke. "Right, I mean. With all the changes, I'm sure you guys are drowning in work over there."
"It's... been a little stressful," I admitted cautiously. "How about you? Are you kind of over the whole Versailles thing? I saw the layout, it looks amazing."
"No, it's definitely... It's something. It's not what I wanted it to be, but it's still going to be good for my portfolio." He settled against the seat. "I wanted to let you in on something happening behind the scenes. But I need to know you're on our side."
Ominous, much? "Side? I don't - " I stopped myself. Whatever he was going to tell me, it would be something I wanted to know, either to protect Porteras or to get ahead in my own career.
Not to protect Neil? I asked myself, in a voice that, again, sounded suspiciously like Holli. But if Holli had been here, she would have wanted me to get some juicy dirt. If she was going to be my really inept conscience, I'd better do what she said.
"Of course I'm on your side, Jake. We're buddies, right?" I smiled, imitating Holli's practiced expressions for modeling. Obviously, I wasn't as good at it as she was, but I didn't think Jake would notice I was lying, so long as it was the lie he wanted to hear.
God, how did I not realize what a sleaze he was? Had he been on good behavior when Gabriella had been around? Or had I just been too swamped in her demands to notice anything about the people around me?
"Absolutely." He adopted the tone of a professional multi-level marketer, too earnest to be trusted, like he would promise me anything to close the sale. "So, you didn't hear this from me. But apparently Neil Elwood's daughter is an animal rights activist, and that's why he's making all of these crazy demands at the magazine."
My jaw dropped. First of all, at Jake's concern that this was somehow confidential information. It had been on Neil's Wikipedia page when I’d checked it yesterday. Second, that Jake had no clue I might have already known. Which meant my unethical, clandestine romance with the boss wasn't the object of office gossip yet. That was a relief.
My phone buzzed. I couldn't resist checking the message. I held up one finger. "Hang on, work text."
I kept my expression carefully neutral as I read: I'd like to push that skirt up and devour your cunt.
"It can wait," I said, quickly turning off the screen. "You were saying?"
"Well, from what we've heard, a lot of designers were already giving him side-eye when he bought the company, for exactly that reason. Apparently, Emma Elwood has her father wrapped around her little finger. He'll do anything for her," Jake said in total disgust, as if the very idea of a father's love revolted him. "So, she decides to shun her daddy's offer of a cushy job at his c
ompany in favor of pretending to have a real job at Global Wellness, and now she wants him to take Porteras vegan or something."
I shook my head. "Mr. Elwood seems pretty smart. I mean, he's run all those other magazines - "
Jake cut me off with a condescending laugh. His teeth were so straight and white. He was like a snake wearing dentures. "Yeah, car magazines? Housewife stuff, tabloids. He doesn't know the first thing about what he's gotten into here, and he's already pissed off a lot of the makeup artists doing the shoots for February's issue. They have to use only cruelty free products."
"Same edict for the beauty department, too," I pointed out. "So, you think it's his daughter behind all this?"
"Oh, most definitely." We'd come to a stand still in traffic, and he looked out his window, as if he would be able to see the cause of the hold up ahead. Distractedly, he added, "Oh, you'll like this. His business partner, Valerie Stern? Emma's mother. Apparently, Elwood can't keep it in his pants at work and has to give out companies like hard candy to cover up his mistakes. But seriously, you didn't hear all this from me."
I hadn't, so it was easy to cross my heart and promise, "You didn't tell me any of this."
My phone vibrated again. "Hang on, maybe it can't really wait."
I pretended to look concerned while I read: If we were alone together right now, I would push you over my desk, wrap that cute little ponytail around my fist, and pull your hair while I fucked you.
I cleared my throat and checked out the window. The traffic was still snarled. I eyed the sidewalk on the other side of the street. "Um. I guess it's kind of an emergency. I should get back."
"In beauty?" I was beginning to really hate Jake's derisive laugh. "Do you guys even have emergencies there?"
"When lip gloss calls," I offered apologetically. I wasn't running back to the office to have sex with Neil. That just wasn't a smart idea, and the last time we'd done anything there it had been a disaster. But I couldn't sit and listen to Jake's bullshit for another second without screaming and ripping out my hair. "I can't screw this up right now. You understand, right? Here, let me give you ten for the cab - "
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