by Rae Matthews
The realization comes to me then that if he really is that kind of guy, why in the world would I want him as a boyfriend? We can just have some fun and some mind-blowing sex, and when it has run its course, then it’s done. I like hanging out with him, so if we end up on a semi-real kind of date from time to time, then great. But I’m not about to trick some guy into being my boyfriend!
I readjust the twins for maximum tipping, and make my way to the bar with my head held high. Confidence is flowing off of me in waves, and I feel like a new woman. So hear me fucking roar!
There is nothing like having a crazy girl breakdown to reignite your inner women. The way I’m feeling now, you would think that I just entered some awesome movie scene where the main female character, yes that would be me, has a life altering epiphany while standing in the bathroom, and it changes the whole course of the movie.
That moment would be followed up by some epic music selection, starting on the jukebox. Let’s say, some AC/DC. Thunderstruck, perhaps. The beat picks up speed, getting me even more riled up and ready to kick some ass. There would be an epic hair flip as I turn around and slam open the door to the bathroom, all in slow motion of course, because slow motion is dramatic as hell. As I walk towards the bar to the beat of AC/DC, still in slow motion, I’m pushing ogling guys out of my way. I reach the bar and shove some guy back into his seat. He had been trying to look down my shirt, and but he falls back into a pile of his friends at the impact when I shout, “Who here needs a drink?” The people in the bar would go wild, cheering and rushing to have me serve them.
That may have been the way I felt tonight, but unfortunately the real scene was a little less dramatic, and more cringe-worthy. I slammed open the door and hit some girl by mistake, apologized profusely, then ran for the bar, tripping and nearly falling on my ass. When I finally get up to the bar, there is some jackass guy banging on it, yelling about getting another beer. I prefer my version of events, so when I tell Megan and Sadie about them tonight, that is what they are going to hear.
The bartender that was already working was kind of new, so she quickly got backed up and people were getting pissed. I told a few people to pipe down or they would get cut off, rather than another drink. That settled them down real quick. It only took about twenty minutes before everyone was happily drinking, and I was able to breathe. So of course, that is the exact moment when Bash’s friend decides he needs some refills.
I walk over to him and ask what I can get for him as I deliver a big bartender’s smile. He looks at me like he knows me, but can’t seem to place from where. He doesn’t say anything about it and just asks for three Bud Lights and three snakebite shots. I’m almost relieved that he doesn’t say anything, but at the same time, that needy girl hanging out inside of me kind of wanted him to say something so I could probe a little bit and see what information I could have gotten out of him about Bash and I.
As I hand him his drinks and give him his total, he looks at me a little harder and grabs some money out of his pocket. As he hands it over, he tells me to keep the change and smiles as he walks away. Oh crap, is he hitting on me now? I hope not, that would be awkward. No, I’m sorry, you can’t have my phone number. I’m currently having sex with your boy, and I don’t like to keep it in the family.
I lean over the bar to look toward the back corner where I see he is on his phone. Oh shit, he just looked at me. Oh shit, he is nodding his head and smiling at me. I smile back and push off of the bar. Ok well, that wasn’t awkward or anything.
A little while later he comes back up to the bar, and unfortunately my co-worker is already helping someone. I walk over and smile, then ask, “You ready for another round?”
“Yeah, but this time I need four. I have another friend on the way over,” he replies.
“Sure thing, four Bud Lights and four snakebites?” I confirm.
He nods his head, and I run to grab the beers and make the shots. I wonder to myself if the friend is Bash. He knew I was working tonight, so if he was going to stop by, I would think he would have told me he would be seeing me later. Maybe it’s not him; maybe it’s another friend. Either way, I guess I will find out shortly. I finish making the drinks and bring them over to him.
“That will be eighteen dollars,” I say.
“I’m Jesse. You must be Sasha,” he says while handing me his money. “Keep the change.”
“Nice to meet you, Jesse. Yes, I am Sasha. Have we met before?” I try to play it off like I have no idea who he is.
“Bash is a friend of mine. I saw you on the beach a few weeks ago. In fact, he ditched us for you,” he tells me.
I start to blush “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for him to ditch you. It’s very nice to meet you.” I add a soft giggle and a smile. Ok, so I’m playing it a little cutesy, but whatever, I’m over it.
“Say, he is on his way over here. I just have to tell you-” He suddenly gets a very serious look on his face. “Bash is a great guy, but if you’re gonna be one of those chicks that is gonna run should things get a little tough, do us all a favor and just end it now, will you? He doesn’t need any more of you coming in and out of his life!”
My jaw drops to the floor. What is he talking about? I have no words to respond. I just look at him like a deer caught in headlights, about to get hit by a Mack truck. Jesse is warning me to treat Bash right. Well, I have to say, that was the last thing I expected to come out of his mouth tonight.
WHEN BASH WALKED INTO THE bar a few minutes later, my heart sank. He looked over at me and waved, smiled, then walked toward Jesse and me.
“I said nothing to you. I will deny it if you mention it at all,” Jesse whispers to me right before Bash approaches us.
“Hi Sasha. Hey Jesse,” Bash says, smiling as he grabs one of the beers.
“If you’re gonna take a beer, you better be taking one of those shots too, ‘ya pussy,” Jesse says to Bash. He flashes me a look that says do we have an understanding?
I nod my head and smile at both of them. I’m happy to see Bash, but now I’m royally confused with a capital ‘C.’ Here I have been worried about him being a player, but from what Jesse said, he might just be damaged. If a dude is telling me to step back, so to speak, then Bash must have had some chick really do a number on him. My poor Bash. And now Jesse tells me I can’t even ask him about it. Well, wait just a minute. Jesse said I can’t tell Bash that he said something, but he didn’t say anything about me questioning him about the exes. As I think about that for a moment, I realize that maybe I need to get him a few more drinks before I open up any old wounds. And by a few, I mean many.
Several hours later, the boys are in prime form: singing, hugging, cheering; pretty much the regular I’m drunk and you’re my friend male bonding routine. Bash comes up to the bar alone to get another round. They should have been cut off two rounds ago, but I’ve been sneaky, and the last two rounds of shots were really just a shot of water with a large amount of lime juice and a splash of apple juice for color. They just think their taste buds have adjusted. I can’t do much about swapping out the beers, but I did however make them promise me to take cabs home as I took their car keys.
“Hey, Bash. You boys ready for another round?” I ask as I start prepping the shots.
“No, no sir babe, we done be did, need a cab.” Bash manages to slur together.
“Oh, ok. Let me call one for your friends, and if you want, it’s almost last call so I can give you a ride home myself.” I offer.
I smile and put my hand on his. He looks back toward his friend then at me.
“Yeah I think that will work.” He says while staring at my chest, but trying desperately not to make it look so obvious.
I may have overdone the serving and skipped right past the informative stage, just to end up at the babbling idiot stage. Oh well. If I can take him back to my place and get him to pass out there, at least I will have him all to myself in the morning.
The cab arrives just as I’m closing the bar,
and his friends pile in. Bash and his friends do the crude drunk man goodbye, and as the cab pulls away, Bash makes a thrusting motion with his hips in my direction. Yeah, like that is gonna happen tonight.
“Heyyy baby,” he slurs, “So is it back to your place for some play time?” Bash asks while moving in an awkward, drunk sashaying strut kind of motion
“Well, its back to my place for the night,” I smile and lock the door with my key.
“What, no play time when we get there?” he asks in a drunken pouty kind of tone.
“Oh um, let me think about that for a second. Drunk man flopping all over me like a fish out of water, while I avoid your breath which smells like stale beer and Yukon Jack, and I’m completely sober. I’m gonna go with ‘no’ on this one,” I answer.
Just as predicted, Bash passes out as soon as I plop him on my bed, so I don’t have to worry about fighting off another drunken, smelly dick-pirate as he tries to pillage and plunder me. I decide to sleep on the couch and let him sprawl out comfortably. Even drunk and obnoxious, he is still sexy as hell. If he were just a little less drunk, I would totally fall into bed with him again tonight.
The next morning, I wake up to the sound of ringing. I don’t recognize the noise, but soon realize that it must be Bash’s phone. His friends are probably calling to see if he scored with me last night. Wait, no, they are all probably still passed out, too. It is way too early for pussy bragging after partying as hard as they all did last night. The ringing stops for a moment and then starts back up again. Whoever it is seems to really want to talk to him. I sprint over to the bed and pull the phone out of his pants pocket, just in time for it to stop ringing. I take a peek at the screen, just because it’s out.
4 missed calls from Emma.
Who is Emma? It could be a sister he hasn’t mentioned. I would imagine if she was his mother, it would say ‘Mom’ instead. Bash starts to stir in the bed, so I quickly put the phone on my nightstand. He rolls over and looks at me. He lets out a barely audible expletive, and I smile at him.
“Well, good morning to you, too. I’ll get you some water and a few Advil.” I say, turning towards the kitchen.
“Did I make an ass of myself last night?” he asks.
“Don’t worry about it, you were fine.”
“I am so sorry about that. The guys called to tell me they were at the Broken Jukebox and that you were working, and next thing I know I was in my car driving over. I couldn’t stay away,” he explains.
“It was fun watching you hang out with your friends, even if I had to be stuck behind the bar,” I laugh.
I walk over and hand him a glass of ice cold water and three tablets. He sits up to pop the pills in his mouth and chugs the water down like a camel in the dessert.
“You had a few missed calls from Emma,” I say in a curious tone.
He damn near chokes on the water, spitting a little back into the glass. “Did you answer it?” he asks, looking panicked.
I will not pry. I will not pry. I will not pry, I repeat to myself as a mantra. “Uh no, it’s your phone.” I leave out the part that I missed the last call and was about to answer it for him. Why is he so nervous about me talking to Emma? Is she an ex or something and doesn’t want me to know that he still talks to her? Or worse, is she a current?
I’m just about to ask who Emma is when the phone rings again. He rushes to grab the phone and when he sees the caller ID, he excuses himself to the bathroom. I try really hard not to eavesdrop, but when you stand right outside the door, it isn’t hard not to listen. But I know he’s speaking quietly, because I can really only hear hushed tones and mumbles.
As I move closer towards the door, I do manage to catch, “I know I’m sorry,” pause. “I will make it up to you,” longer pause. “Yes, I will be there this afternoon,” another pause. “Ok, see you soon.” The door handle starts to jiggle, and I dash back into the kitchen, trying to look natural.
“Everything ok?” I ask.
“Yeah, it’s nothing. It will work itself out. I should probably get going, though.” He responds. He looks around briefly, trying to see if he has forgotten anything before heading for the door.
“Well, I hate to point out that although Captain Obvious is here, your car is not. I drove you last night. You’re welcome.” I inform him.
I can see that I have spoiled what was probably a great escape plan for him to avoid explaining to me who the hell Emma is. He glances back at me with an oh shit, I’m fucked look. And it wasn’t the good kind of fucked, either.
“Let me grab my keys, and I will take you to your car.” I tell him, adding a what the fuck smile at the end.
“No, that’s ok. Really, I can walk,” he responds.
Walk? He would rather walk half a mile than be in a car with me right now? Oh hell no, he is not getting away with that shit. I have questions, and I would like some answers.
“No really, I insist.” I grab my keys and walk towards the door. If he declines now, then he is just being a giant dick.
“Ok, only if you really don’t mind. I have a feeling I have imposed on you all night,” he says.
Oh, so now it’s because he doesn’t want to impose on me. Sure it is motherfucker, or should I say ex-girlfriend fucker. As we get into my car, I try to shamelessly pry a little more. What have I really got to lose at this point?
“So, is Emma ok? She called so many times, it must have been an emergency to blow up your phone like that so early in the morning,” I ask coyly.
“No, it wasn’t an emergency, and if you want to know who she is, you can just ask.” He says in a stern voice.
Pissy much? “Ok, so who is Emma?” I ask tentatively.
“She is nobody to you. She’s just a friend,” he responds in an angry tone, looking out of the passenger window to avoid any and all eye contact.
Oh really! That’s all I’m gonna get? First, Jesse tells me to pretty much head for the hills, and now Emma is nobody to me and is just his friend? I’m just about to slam on the breaks and pull over to kick him out of the car and right out of my life when he turns to me, looking contrite.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Emma is a friend of mine who has had a pretty crappy hand dealt to her in life, and I help her out sometimes. I backed out on some plans with her last night to come see you at work, and to make it up to her I was supposed to help her first thing this morning. I’ve never bailed on her before, so she is a little freaked out, and on top of that I overslept this morning.” He tells me, with sorrow clouding his eyes.
I’m being such a bitch, again! He ditched out on what seems to be a very good friend in need to see me, and I’m treating him like he just told me he gave me an STD. Bottom line is, we have only known each other all of a few weeks, and he doesn’t have an obligation to tell me every detail of his life. I’m sure he will tell me more about her and probably even introduce us after I have proven to him that I’m not be a psychopath. Although, that ship may have already sailed.
“No, I’m sorry, too. Who you hang out with when you’re not with me is really none of my business at this point. It’s not like I’m your girlfriend or anything.” I add, trying to accept my part in this little misunderstanding.
He looks over at me and grabs my hand. “Thank you for understanding, it means a lot to me.” He says and kisses my palm sweetly.
I’m betting that Emma must have been the reason that Jesse said something to me last night. I can’t stop wondering why he was so intense about it, though. It doesn’t sound that bad. I’d like to know what happened to her to make Bash feel such a strong pull towards helping her at the cost of his own personal life.
“I totally understand, and you can tell Jesse that a chick friend does not sound like tough times to me, so I don’t think I will be heading for any hills anytime soon.” It just blurts out of my mouth so fast that I don’t even know what I’m saying until it’s already out there.
Shit! My jaw drops and I look over at Bash. His eyes
are fixed on mine. His eyes turn angry, and I have to look away to concentrate on parking the car, since we have just arrived at the bar. Shit. Shit. Shit mother fucking shit! Now what do I do? I don’t want Bash to be mad at Jesse, he was just looking out for his friend. But I also don’t want Jesse to think I’m not trustworthy. Fuck me and my big ass mouth.
“Um, yeah, can we just forget I said that?” I say slowly. Hey, a girl can try, can’t she?
“What the hell did Jesse say to you?” he demands.
“Oh, um, nothing really. He was just looking out for you, I guess. You know, giving me the, I’m the best friend and you better not break my boy’s heart, speech.” I rattle it off so fast that I actually believe it. It’s not that far from the truth, really. He didn’t actually tell me anything, so it’s not a real lie.
“I’m gonna kill him! He had no right to talk to you about anything!” he shouts.
“Hey, wait just a minute. Your friend was just looking out for you. He just said that if I was the kind of girl to run if things got a little tough, then I should just end it now. I actually thought it was kind of sweet of him,” I try to explain.
“No, he had no right!” he continues to yell as he opens the car door, ready to stomp out.
I put the car in park and follow him as fast as I can. He is already pulling his phone out of his pocket and getting ready to dial. I run up behind him and grab the phone before he can complete the call.
“Ok, what the hell is going on here? You are turning something so minor into a huge deal, so is there something else I should know about?”
“No!” he shouts again. Like I believe that.
“Then what is the problem here? Granted, I don’t know Jesse, and for that matter I barely know you, but if you are suppose to be best friends, I think this is a bit of an overreaction!” I shout back.
