His plea won her and Catherine sighed, “I’ll try. What would you like me to sing?”
“I don’t know, just anything.”
Catherine thought. She knew a few old nursery songs from childhood but those wouldn’t do; he wasn’t a baby. She remembered quite a few hymns from years of church but he’d never gone. Most of the pop songs she’d learned were love songs and those might be just too potent at this moment, for her if not for him. Titles popped into her thoughts and she rejected them until she realized if she didn’t make a choice her lunch break would end without a single song. Annette might search for her again and she doubted singing to a patient would be approved or tolerated. She latched onto the next song that came to mind, singing soft and low in a voice not bad at all if she just had confidence enough to believe it.
“Busted flat in Baton Rouge,” she sang, the words of the old song Janis Joplin made popular long before her time filling her mouth and soul. “...waitin’ for a train. I was feelin’ near as faded as my jeans...”
If anyone’s music might soothe his troubled soul and banish his memories back to hell, Catherine thought the words the Texas singer crooned might. Janis Joplin struggled with her own demons and maybe the lyrics she made famous could defeat Connor’s just for tonight.
Although she sang softly, Connor listened as if she tossed him a life line in a raging river and she watched as his breathing shifted back to easy. His muscles unclenched as he relaxed and she kept an eye on the monitor as his vitals stabilized to normal. By the time she sang the refrain for the last time, without the wild energy Joplin gave the tune, Connor slept again. She unwound her hand from his, kissed his forehead again, and touched his cheek with light fingers, a brief caress.
Then Catherine slipped from the room in the last minutes of her meal break with just enough time to stop in the restroom to stifle the sob caught halfway up her throat. She couldn’t have explained to anyone why she wept but the tears were for Connor, and she resolved if she could, she’d heal him, not just body but heart and soul.
Chapter Three
Her hands remained busy for the rest of the night and she performed her tasks by routine, mind consumed with thoughts of Connor. When the shift ended, she gathered up her stuff to head down to his room for awhile before heading home but Annette stopped her.
“Wait a minute,” she said, “I need to talk to you for a minute.”
Guilt surged up and Catherine expected a reprimand, probably a written one to go into her file but she nodded. “Okay. What’s the problem?”
Annette sighed. “Marti called in sick and I’m shorthanded. Could you stay until noon, work an extra half shift?”
Relief replaced remorse. Working over would put her where she wanted to be anyway.
“Sure, I can do that, no problem.”
“Thanks, hon. I appreciate it. Before we start waking the patients, doing vitals, and breakfast arrives take a quick break and go downstairs for some coffee and a donut or something.”
No one needed to tell her twice. On light feet, she skipped down the hallway and peeked in at Connor. He appeared to be asleep so she dashed to the elevator, picked up coffee and a blueberry scone and returned. She sat down in the chair and took the first sip. Caffeine flowed through her veins, countering some of her fatigue although she yawned as she waited for him to wake. Catherine squinted at the monitor and noted his vitals remained strong. He wasn’t as pale as he had been and she thought he did very well.
If Dr. Craig made morning rounds before she needed to report for duty, she could get an official verdict. She nibbled at her scone as she waited, finished the coffee, and just when she thought she might have to slip away without a chance to say ‘good morning’ or hear the doctor’s report, Connor stirred.
He blinked twice and then he smiled at her, open and transfused with sweetness.
“Hey, Catherine.”
“Hey, Connor,” she returned. “You’re looking better. How do you feel?”
He scratched his chin with one hand as he pondered it. “Are you asking as a nurse or as Cat?”
She swallowed the last piece of scone and it almost stuck in her throat.
“As both, I guess.”
He nodded, “Almost human, then, for Cat, bored out of my mind and ready to get out bed for the nurse.
Catherine laughed. “I bet we’ll have you up in the chair sometime today. You can raise the bed up anytime you want if you feel like it.”
Connor grinned. “Show me how.”
Without thinking about logistics, she leaned over to demonstrate and he caught her face with his left hand. Connor turned her toward him and kissed her, his lips warm and slow. The unexpected caress ignited her emotions and she responded, answering his kiss with her own. A rush of sweet familiarity sent her senses reeling and pulse speeding. She’d wanted this from the first moment she saw him again but Catherine never expected it this soon, if ever. Lost in the kiss, her ears caught the faint whoosh as the door opened and she broke away from him just as Dr. Craig strode into the room.
“Good morning,” he boomed in his cheerful bedside manner. If he noticed their recent lip lock, he mustn’t be commenting and Catherine crossed virtual fingers he wouldn’t say anything if he had. “I’m Dr. Craig and you must be Connor Donavan.”
“Yeah, that’s me,” Connor said.
“I’ve looked through your chart and you seem to be healing,” the doctor said. In his white jacket, he stood beside the bed and scrutinized the monitors. “How’s the pain?”
“It’s tolerable.”
“Good. We’ll wean down the meds before long. I’ve asked the staff to get you up in the chair today and to bathe you as well with a bed bath to start. We’ll want you up and walking soon too, maybe even tomorrow if the swelling’s down enough so we can put a boot on it. Your leg is sprained, a bad one, so it’ll hurt but it’s important to get you moving before it gets too stiff.”
“How soon can I blow this joint?” Connor asked.
Dr. Craig chuckled. “Wanting to go home’s a certain sign of improvement but it’ll be a few days yet. I’ll want you off the catheter, urinating on your own, and able to walk at least with a cane or crutches before we can release you. I hope you have someone at home because you’ll need some assistance when you get there.”
Connor glared at the doctor. “I live alone.”
“Yes, well, then we can make arrangements for a brief convalescent stay in another facility if necessary. I’ll be back this evening to look in on you again.”
“Okay.”
At the door, Dr. Craig paused. “Oh, and one more thing – although you don’t seem combative to me, I saw on your chart you got agitated before the scan yesterday. If you want out of here sooner and you’d rather not be restrained, I’d urge you not to do anything like that again.”
In a tone dryer than good sherry, Connor said, “I’ll try.”
Silence enveloped the room as soon as the doctor departed through the door. After the unexpected but well enjoyed kiss, Catherine wasn’t sure what to say and if she judged by his expression, Connor’s mood shifted down from happy to irate.
“This really bites,” he griped, staring at her with those soulful eyes. “If I thought I wouldn’t pass out in the floor or fall on my ass, I’d unhook all this crap and get out of here now.”
“What’s the problem?” she asked. “Most of what he told you is pretty standard.”
Connor glowered, face wrinkled in displeasure. “I get it but I don’t have anyone at home to take care of me so I have to be self-sufficient but I sure as hell am not going to any “convalescent home”. He makes it sound like I have one foot in the grave. Hanging out with the old folks and the near dead isn’t for me.”
Catherine smiled. “It wouldn’t be so bad, Connor but there are other options.”
“Like what?”
The words flew from her mouth before her brain had time to process them but once said, she wasn’t about to take them back. “Y
ou could stay with me.”
His mouth drooped open and she counted one, two, and three before he spoke.
“Are you serious?”
“Uh-huh.”
Her mind raced to figure out the possibilities. Although her house was small, there would be room. She had more leave than any nurse in the facility so she could take the time off if she wanted and even though inviting Connor home seemed like the craziest thing she’d ever cooked up, she wanted it.
“It’s been a long time, Cat. Are you sure?” His voice sounded strained as if he couldn’t believe what she offered.
“Yes,” she said without hesitation, “You’re not planning to rob, rape, or kill me are you?”
A tiny smile lightened his sober face. “Well, no.”
“I promise not to turn all Annie Wilkes on you,” Catherine said, referencing the character from Misery, the novel and movie by Stephen King where a fan of a famous author kept him a virtual prisoner while she cared for him. “But if you’d rather I get you a list of convalescent care options, I can do it.”
“No,” Connor spit the word out like a watermelon seed. “No, I don’t want that. Thank you, Catherine.”
“You’re welcome. Does this mean you’re staying with me?”
He nodded, looking bashful as the faintest hint of a blush colored his face. “I guess it does.”
“Okay, then. I’ll put in for some vacation time. It’s better if I ask now so they don’t necessarily connect my time off to you.”
He frowned, “Is it a problem? Conflict of interest or something?”
She shook her head, “It’s not, really, but someone could make a big deal of it. I’d just rather they didn’t.”
Connor snatched her hand and held it, “Are you sure about this, Catherine? The last thing I’d want to do would be to cause you any trouble.”
Too late for that, she thought with faint regret and stronger anticipation of the future possibilities. Aloud, she said, “You won’t. Now do you really not know how to make the bed rise up or do I need to show you again?”
This time, he grinned, a smile brightening his features more than sunshine after a thunderstorm’s end, “I think you need to show me.”
“You have a control right here,” she indicated and demonstrated. That left him in an upright position. Before she could step back, he pulled her near enough to kiss her again. Heat flared between them and she shut her eyes to savor the burst of pleasure. This time when the door opened, she never heard it until the sharp, shocked voice of her supervisor cut into her delight.
“Catherine Lessard! I wondered what on earth could be taking so long. What are you doing?”
Embarrassment, the kind she hadn’t felt since her teenage years, flushed her face with heat and she figured she must be red to her collar. “I’m sorry, Annette.”
“She’s giving me mouth to mouth resuscitation,” Connor said, still holding her hand.
Annette’s fixed stare lacked any trace of amusement. “I should reprimand you for this with a formal write-up. I can’t believe what I saw, Catherine. Can you explain?”
She could but didn’t want to even try, “I’d rather not.”
“Consider this a verbal warning that won’t go any farther than between us. If you hadn’t been one of the best nurses I’ve had working for me, I’d write you up and put you on probation. You know that, don’t you?”
She nodded, mute with shame and a little misplaced anger. Annette had the right to chew her out but a little piece of Catherine resented it. She’d never been flighty or one to flirt with any patient. And with Connor it was different.
“Good. Then go start doing vitals at the other end of the hallway. I’ll chart Mr. Donavan’s and I’ll have Ruthanna give him a bath after breakfast. It should be here any minute. And I’ll talk with you, later, Catherine.”
“All right.”
She could resist glancing at Connor who winked at her, evoking a smile. She mouthed, “Later” and he nodded.
After the first morning rounds of checking vitals, passing meds, and other daily routines, Annette beckoned her into her tiny office.
“Sit down, Catherine.”
She sat.
“We need to talk about what happened this morning. You’re one of the best nurses I’ve ever had the privilege to work with but this kind of behavior is unacceptable. I’d just make sure you aren’t around Mr. Donavan but we’re a small facility and I can’t. I don’t know what’s going on with you or the two of you but I’m going to ask you to keep it professional. Can you do that?”
“Yes,” Catherine said in a voice softer than usual. She felt like a second grader called into the principal’s office. “Since it’s become an issue, I need to tell you something.”
Annette’s eyes narrowed, “What is it?”
“I know Connor. We grew up together and he was my first boyfriend.”
After a pause which made the room heavy as granite, Annette sighed. “It explains a lot but it doesn’t make it right, Catherine.”
“I know,” she replied, “There’s more. When he leaves the hospital, Connor’s going to stay with me until he’s back on his feet. I have a lot of vacation time available and I need to take a few weeks of it.”
“Catherine!” Shock elevated Annette’s voice. “Are you sure about this?”
“Yes, I am.”
Annette shook her head like a dog worrying a bone. “It’s your life and what you do when you’re away from the hospital is none of my business. I can’t stop you or I think I would. I’ll give you the time off, partly because you need a break. I can see that now. Fill out a form and I’ll approve it.”
“Thank you.”
“But I’m also warning you if I see anything like a kiss again – or if any staff member reports something similar to me – then you’ll be written up formally, maybe even terminated. If it happens, how long you’ve known the patient doesn’t matter. Am I clear?”
After years of working hard, never missing a day, filling in for others, it seemed harsh but she nodded, “Yes, Annette.”
“Good. You’re scheduled for two days off after today, right?”
“Yes,” she answered, “I have a question, though.”
“What?”
“If I’m here to visit Connor while I’m off duty, will it be a problem?”
If looks could kill, Catherine would be dead on the floor, beyond resuscitation.
“You have every right to visit whoever you like when you’re not on the clock,” Annette said, teeth clenched and tone strained. “If you’re here as a visitor, then you’re here and I can’t do anything about it. I can’t chastise you or let it influence my view on your job performance. As your friend I would advise against it but somehow I don’t think you’re going to listen to me.”
Catherine didn’t flinch. “No, I’m afraid not.”
“Very well, then. Go back to work.”
“Thank you.”
The remainder of the morning went fast and she kept busy. Twice she managed to pop into Connor’s room, the first time just after he’d finished his breakfast tray. He glanced up, face dejected until he realized it was her, then he asked,
“Hey, I’m sorry if I got you in trouble.”
“It’s okay – no big deal. I just can’t get caught again.”
“Will this make a difference in me staying with you?”
Catherine sat down on the edge of his bed and faced him, risky but she’d take the chance. “No, I told her about it. I’m off for two days after I leave at noon, the rest of today and two more. I’ll be here to see you then. I told Annette I would. She didn’t like it but she can’t do anything to me.”
“Are you sure?” He sounded concerned. “I don’t want you to get in a mess because of me.”
“I’m positive.”
Connor grinned. “So you’re really coming back while you’re off to see me?”
“I am unless you’d rather I didn’t.”
“I’d miss you
if you didn’t come see me,” he admitted. “I’m glad you want to come. Cat. I’ve missed you.”
His one sentence filled her with an amazing happiness. She felt like she could dance down the corridor for the next few hours, feet light and graceful, singing to the world. “I missed you, too, Connor. Now I’ve got to go or I’ll be in trouble.”
He nodded.
“And don’t give Ruthanna any trouble either or they’ll have you in restraints,” she called as she dashed out into the corridor. “I’ll be back when I can.”
By noon, she dropped in twice and by then, he’d had his bed bath. The aides also had him up in the single chair, legs draped with a blanket and when she got off shift for the day, he sat there, tray table parked in front of him, eating lunch with very little gusto.
“Hey,” she said as she came into the room, “How’s it going?”
Connor wrinkled his nose and made a face. “It’s okay, I guess. The food sucks.”
“What is it?”
He poked at the meat, some kind of steak covered with thick brown gravy. “I’m not sure and I probably don’t even want to know.”
She laughed and rested a hand on his shoulder. “I doubt you would. Do you feel better, sitting up?”
He waved a flat hand back and forth. “I don’t know. My head whirled a little when they first parked me here.”
“That’s normal,” she assured him. “I’m going home for awhile, catch a nap and I’ll be back around dinner time, okay?”
His smile could have melted gold. “Sure. I’ll be here.”
Catherine moved her hand from his shoulder to ruffle though his hair. Off duty now, she felt bold and so she bent down, kissed him full on the mouth and then walked out the door. She didn’t dare look back, heart pounding like a bass drum in a marching band, but she heard him chuckle as she slipped out into the hallway.
She waited until she stepped onto the elevator, alone, before she let her grin spread over her face and silly as it was, she high-fived her reflection in the mirror at the back. She hadn’t felt this happy or excited in a very long time and she liked it.
Cat's Patient Heart Page 4
