He stood and slapped on a pair of breeches and a shirt, cursing himself for the worst sort of scoundrel. He had no right to bring unhappiness to her. He didn’t want to be the cause of the sadness in her pretty eyes. She deserved far better than a worthless bastard like him. But he was damned if he knew how to make peace between them.
She’d nearly made it to Thomas’ sick room when a pair of hands clamped on her waist. With a muffled shriek, she spun about, prepared to do battle. She didn’t trust the pirates one bit, despite any threats Edmond may have made to them regarding her safety. Her heart kicked a beat when she realized Edmond had followed her.
He hauled her against his chest. “Why do you run from me, Lizzie?”
It was true. She had been running. Her emotions for him were too raw, too real, a jumbled hodgepodge of old clashing with new. “I have a patient to care for if you’ll recall,” she reminded him.
“I’m aware of that.” He tipped up her chin. “But Jean is keeping watch over him with orders to fetch us if Thomas’ condition changes. You’ve done what you could. Working yourself to weakness won’t help him.”
“I can take care of myself,” she told him. The need for some distance between them was a strong urge.
“While you’re on my ship, I’m responsible for your welfare.”
Her patience snapped like a weak thread. “If that’s indeed true, you’re failing miserably. I’m the most in danger when in your presence.”
He released her. “If you don’t want to suffer my attentions, you need only say the words.”
Her heart ached, mind warring with common sense and confusion and, worst of all, the love that had always been simmering beneath the surface of her heart. All for him, only for him. “I don’t understand you, Edmond.”
“Christ, I don’t understand myself.”
He reached for her hand, but she pulled it from his grasp. “Don’t.”
“Ah.” A pained smile curved his lips. “Have you regained your senses then?”
It hurt her to deny him, truly it did, but her own self-preservation had to win the day. She was not, could never be, as world weary as he. “I think it unwise for us to proceed in such a foolhardy manner. I lost my head.”
“Well, best you lose yours before I lose mine.”
Lizzie lost her temper. “Stop it at once.”
He raised a brow, impassive as ever. “Stop what?”
“Jesting about your demise as if it were an amusing parlor sally. Haven’t you heard about all the pirates who’ve been killed? Bad enough your own brother lies dying. It seems you’re bent on killing yourself as well.” Anger mingled with frustration. She slapped at his coat, wanting to make him see reason. “Bless your poor mother. She must be a saint for all this.”
“My mother is dead,” he bit out. “I don’t think she gives a damn.”
She felt the lash of his words like a blow. He had worshipped his mother, and she understood that her loss would have devastated him.
Even so, the knowledge of his mother’s passing didn’t render Lizzie any less frustrated. “She may not, but I do care,” she lashed at him. “I care, Edmond. What happened to make you into the man you’ve become? What made you so cold?”
“Seeing hell.” His tone was grim. “Living through one battle after the next. Almost dying. You’ve lived your pretty life without a bit of discomfort or misfortune.”
“How dare you?” Rage coursed through her. “Do you think I was fortunate to nurse my husband through illness? To watch helplessly each day as he faded away? Do you think it was comfortable to be left with nothing, to have to depend upon my father for my bread once more?”
His stare was intense, blazing. Silence reigned in the wake of her outburst for several beats before he broke it.
“It is my turn to beg your pardon. Forgive me, Lizzie.” Sincerity laced his voice. “I hadn’t realized.”
She attempted to inure herself against his sudden softening. “You may be the feared Captain Grey, but you aren’t the only person on this earth who has ever been through difficult times or who has ever known pain and hurt.”
“Lizzie, look at me.” He caught her around the waist when she would have turned away, pulling her to him. His hand was firm on her chin, his brown gaze trapping hers. “I’m an arse.”
Though she hated herself for it, her anger began dissipating. “You needn’t have told me. I already knew.”
He laughed then, a bitter bark that had nothing to do with levity. “How is it a slip of a woman can bring me so low?”
That she, Lizzie Winstead, would have such power over a man such as he seemed impossible. She would not have believed it so, were he not in her arms, looking down at her as if she were…as if she were somehow necessary to him.
Surely not. Surely that was wishful thinking on her part.
She shook her head, belatedly recalling his question. “I cannot answer that, Edmond. Only you can.”
With a groan, he lowered his mouth to hers. Her resolve had been short-lived. But as quickly as the fires of desire ignited, they were doused as the ship gave a great heave beneath them, sending Lizzie to her knees. Edmond caught her up in his arms, holding her against him.
The hollers of men could be heard above them, mingling with the sudden roar of the sea.
“What is happening?” she asked Edmond, fear roiling through her stomach.
“A storm.” Edmond’s jaw was a tight line, his tone grim.
“So quickly?”
He nodded. “Get into the cabin with Thomas and don’t leave unless I come for you.”
“But Edmond—”
“On this I am quite firm, Lizzie. I need to keep both of you safe, and there’s no telling what manner of storm this is. We’ve already taken a battering from the battle and we can hardly afford to withstand much more.”
Another wave hit, sending the ship lolling to her side. Lizzie would have fallen if not for Edmond’s grip on her. She allowed him to rush her to Thomas’ cabin. The belly of the ship groaned and creaked around them, giving voice to the fright coursing through her.
Jean rose from Thomas’ side at their entrance. “Captain, the storm, she is an angry one.”
“God’s blood, you can say that again. I’ll need all hands on deck, Jean. Mrs. Winstead will stay with Thomas.”
He pulled Lizzie to him and dropped a quick kiss on her mouth. “Promise me you’ll stay here.”
She nodded, shock and fear warring with a new barrage of emotions. “I promise.”
Edmond nodded, his expression fierce, that of a man going into battle. “I’ll come back to you as soon as I can. Jean?”
And then the two men were gone, leaving Lizzie to await her fate as the ship rocked helplessly in the tempest about to besiege them all.
Chapter Six
Edmond stomped into the storm expecting the worst and finding it. Above deck, the situation was a grave one. Men scrambled on the deck together, trying to secure the jibs and maintain the proper direction. The storm possessed an inherent, virulent fury that shook even a seasoned sailor like Edmond. He’d lived through his share of storms, but this one seemed unholy bad.
He and Jean went into action, taking up the quarterdeck and shouting commands above the din of the roaring sea. Tremendous waves rose and fell twenty feet or more in height, crashing down on the deck. It was treacherous work to remain standing and not be lost forever to the ocean. The winds had grown with astounding strength, putting the ship’s sails in peril.
There was no help for it, Edmond realized. They couldn’t fight the storm. All they could do was give in, which meant following the winds. They’d have to give up on Maine and head south, back into the dangerous territory of the Chesapeake. The Governor of Virginia wanted him dead. It would be foolhardy to head there so soon, but they had no other option.
Another wave slapped the Freedom, sending a cascade of seawater over her deck. He called out to Jean. Under ordinary conditions, he knew the Freedom’s hull was leak
y, let alone under the pressure of high seas. It wouldn’t do to take on too much water.
He called out to Jean, “Get to the pumps. We’re taking on water, and tell all hands we need them to man the sails. We’ll have to go south with the wind or it’ll tear them all to hell.”
“South, sir?” Jean looked at him in askance. “That cannot be wise, no?”
“Wiser than sending us all to the bottom of the ocean,” he replied with grim determination. “We’ll have to take our chances with the devil we know.”
Jean nodded and left the quarterdeck to Edmond, carrying out his orders. It was then, as the winds and waves kicked up a battle to beat the Armada all around him, that a crippling comprehension struck him. One thought more than the possibility of drowning, the chance his ship would break apart and sink to a watery perdition, or the thought of losing his friends overboard, slammed home. One thought more than any other shook him to his core.
He had to survive this night, if only to save the woman he loved.
Damn my blood, he silently cursed. He’d spent the last ten years scouring the ocean in search of himself, but he’d never been able to escape the one inevitable lure that brought every man to his knees.
A woman.
His woman.
The only woman he’d ever loved.
Lizzie didn’t know how much time passed in the grip of the storm. Thunderous waves sent her reeling to the floor more than once. She tried to keep her mind from the possibility that the ship could sink, taking her down with it, by tending to her patient. She did her utmost to keep Thomas comfortable. The oil in the lamp had burned low by the time Thomas began stirring.
His eyes opened slowly to reveal the same penetrating dark stare as his older brother’s. “What?” he croaked.
Hope blossomed within her. Surely it was a good sign that he’d regained consciousness. Surely the good Lord would not cast them all to the bottom of the ocean after performing a miracle. She pressed a cup of water to his lips and helped him to take a few steadying sips.
“Hush now,” she crooned. “Conserve your strength. I’m Lizzie, an old friend of your brother’s. I believe we met on several occasions.”
“I remember you.” His halting voice was rusty with disuse and a tongue made slow by many days of illness. “It…hasn’t been that many…years. How the hell…did you come to be on this ship?”
She smiled at his bold question. It too was a good sign. His thoughts seemed sharp. “You were injured in battle. Your ship’s surgeon was killed, so your brother sought out my father to assist you. But my father was away, and I’m afraid you were left with me instead.”
“My head feels like it’s been stuck…on a goddamn pike.”
“Indeed.” She offered him some more water. “I assure you it hasn’t.”
“I suppose I owe you,” he took another greedy gulp, “thanks?”
“You owe your brother thanks,” she refuted. “He put his life at risk to save yours.”
He closed his eyes, clearly drained from his illness. “You have my gratitude.”
The ship listed again, this time with less force. She hoped the winds and waves above had calmed. Her stomach churned quite violently with the upheaval the storm had produced.
“You’re welcome, Thomas.”
He remained quiet for a few moments. Just when she thought he’d fallen back asleep, he shocked her with a troubling question. “Are you still in love with my brother?”
Her gaze shot to his but his eyes were yet closed. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re speaking of.”
His eyes opened again. “Let’s be honest, shall we, Lizzie? Unless I miss my guess, there’s a storm brewing above deck that’s about to pitch us to the bottom of the sea. There is no need for falsehoods.”
“You’re certainly garrulous for a man newly rescued from death.” She didn’t mean to sound so contrary, but she couldn’t help it.
“You’re the one who performed the rescuing,” he pointed out in a good-natured tone that belied the fatigue he so obviously fought.
The ship gave another violent toss. The hull groaned as Lizzie went sprawling. She righted herself, effectively sobered. “Very well. It does seem we’re in dire straits.”
“You saved me so I can become food for the fishes.” He gave her a halfhearted grin. “Kind of you.”
“I hope not.” Fear welled up within her, as powerful as the waves that could be heard crashing on the decks above. “Thomas?”
“Yes, Lizzie?”
“I have two confessions to make. The first is that I’m terribly frightened just now.” She paused, weighing the wisdom of her next words. “And the second is that I never stopped loving Edmond.”
“I thought as much.”
A niggling worry asserted itself. “Thomas, has he anyone who loves him? A wife or a mistress somewhere?”
“Edmond has no one waiting for his return.”
Relief slid through her. She had initially assumed he was unattached, but she wanted to be certain. Never would she want to pine after a man who already belonged to another woman. It would be even more reckless than pining after a pirate captain already was. Yes, she had to admit to herself she was the worst sort of fool. Perhaps in the light of day, with her life in a much more tenable position, she would regain her sanity.
Another wave assailed them, tearing a gasp from her throat. Her demise was a real possibility, and the thought was most sobering.
“Take my hand,” Thomas said quietly, reaching toward her. “I haven’t prayed in a long time, but I think we should now.”
She linked her fingers with his and bowed her head, adding a silent prayer of her own for the captain roaming the decks of their besieged ship.
Chapter Seven
A seemingly long, though indeterminate gap of time stretched between the last vestiges of the storm and the moment Edmond stalked back through the door. Lizzie jumped up at his entrance. He was soaked through, his shirt torn open, blood streaming from a cut on his shoulder. He looked weary and battered.
“Edmond.” She went to him, rushing into his arms. She didn’t care if he smelled of the sea or if he dampened her own dress. Nothing mattered but that he was here with her. He’d survived. They’d all survived. It was the second miracle of the evening. His arms tightened around her and he buried his face in her hair.
“You’re safe,” she whispered, scarcely believing their good fortune.
“My God, Lizzie, I thought I’d never see you again.” He pulled away and dropped a quick, hard kiss on her mouth. “I swear to Christ that storm came directly from the devil himself.”
“Felicitations to you too, brother.” Thomas’ wry drawl interrupted their impromptu reunion.
Flushing, Lizzie stepped out of Edmond’s embrace. Her emotions had overcome her. She’d already forgotten Thomas’ presence when just minutes before, she’d been redressing his wound.
“Thomas, damn you, you’re awake.” A grin replaced the somber downward tilt of Edmond’s lips. He crossed the room and delivered a sound clap to his brother’s shoulder that left Thomas grimacing. “I thought you were going to die, you bastard.”
“Easy on the brotherly concern, Eddie. I’ve still got the devil of a headache.”
“I’m of half a mind to give you another headache,” Edmond muttered. “If you ever take a musket ball for me again, I’ll bloody well kill you.”
Understanding dawned on Lizzie. That certainly explained Edmond’s despair and anger with himself. Thomas had obviously been protecting his older brother when he’d suffered the wound. She pressed her hand over her heart, touched by watching the two men interact. Little wonder Edmond had been so devastated.
Thomas gave a halfhearted laugh. “It’s my duty to look after my brother. You sure as hell don’t look after yourself.”
“That’s my business, puppy.” Edmond’s tone was affectionate. It was clear the two brothers loved and respected each other very much.
“I understand
thanks are in order for bringing an angel to rescue me.” Thomas looked to Lizzie. “She performed a miracle on this old body of mine.”
“Not so old yet.” Edmond turned, his gaze on hers sending an answering flood of warmth through her. “With any luck, thanks to Mrs. Winstead, you’ll be blessed enough to live to be an old man in truth.” He looked back to his brother. “You just have to quit pirating.”
“Go to hell,” Thomas scoffed. “I’ll quit when I see fit.”
“Watch yourself, brother. You’ll quit if I throw you off my ship,” Edmond warned.
“You don’t scare me, Eddie. This is our ship. The other men would have to vote in favor of leaving me and I don’t think they would.”
Edmond heaved a sigh that sounded bone-deep. “You’re right, damn your blood.”
Thomas just grinned. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’m in the mood for a nap and you stink like a moldy barrel of salt cod.”
Lizzie couldn’t help but laugh, which earned her a glare from Edmond. “’Twas your brother who said it, not I,” she defended.
She was feeling suddenly dizzy with relief and fatigue both. She hadn’t slept all night and it was likely soon morning. The stress of caring for Thomas and fearing that any second they’d be cast to the bottom of the sea had drained the fight from her. She was incredibly grateful for the second chance she’d been given, but all she wanted now was a warm bed and a few hours of precious slumber. The only flaw was having to share a bed with Edmond, who, moldy barrel of salt cod odor notwithstanding, was as dangerously compelling to her as ever.
“We’ll leave the devil to his rest, then,” Edmond murmured, his stare deepening to obsidian.
“I’ll check on you in the morning,” she promised Thomas. “Call for me if you should need me before then.”
“Many thanks to you, Lizzie.” Thomas’ eyes had already closed.
Lord of Pirates Page 5
