“I understand.”
He couldn’t understand; he couldn’t know how she felt.
“We need to talk.” Troy motioned to the nearby salesclerks staring at them. “Someplace more private.”
Sitting on a bench in Union Square, Cassie glanced at a lighted Nike billboard. “Do you think the 49ers will win on Sunday?”
“Don’t change the subject.” Troy wasn’t about to let her do that. “I don’t care about the 49ers or football right now.”
“Your choice.”
“I’m glad you’re finally seeing things my way.”
She stared at a crowded cable car headed down Powell Street. The driver clanged the bell and passengers waved. Must be tourists.
“Tell me why you want to cancel the engagement party.”
A strong gust of wind made Cassie shiver so Troy put his arm around her. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Too bad. I want to discuss it.”
“Are you always so…pushy?”
“Only when I have to be.”
“I think it would be for the best,” she said, her vague answer telling him nothing.
“You’re going to have to do better than that.”
She took a deep breath. “Registering made me realize we’ve taken this pretend engagement too far. I want it to stop.”
“It will stop after the party.”
“I want everything to stop now, before I…”
“Before you what?”
She hesitated. “Before we make it worse than it already is.”
“But the party—”
“Means a lot to you. I know, Troy,” she said with sincerity. “I wish I could help you.”
“You can.” Troy wished he knew what was going on inside her beautiful head. He sensed her uncertainty. “Be my fiancée.”
“It’s not that simple,” Cassie said. “The party will be a total nightmare, and I know Emily will pull something.”
“Is she the reason you want to cancel the party?”
“Partly.” She tapped her foot against the pavement. The syncopated rhythm matched his own heart rate. “Remember when I told you my parents put stars on my ceiling?”
Troy nodded, remembering well. Wishing on a plastic star, the closeness of that night. The next morning, he’d thought it would disappear in the harsh reality of day. But it hadn’t. “Your mother was worried about you getting cold.”
“That wasn’t the real reason,” Cassie said. “They did it because they were worried about kidnappers.”
“Kidnappers?”
“Being rich isn’t all fun and games. One night, someone tried to kidnap me when I’d gone to the beach to stargaze.”
The thought of anything happening to Cassie made his gut tighten. Troy pulled her close. He never wanted to let go of her. Never.
After a few seconds, Cassie pulled away. “Would you mind if we headed to the truck? It’s getting cold.”
Troy wanted to keep holding her, but Cassie had already stood. “Let’s go.”
“The only reason the kidnapping attempt failed is my father had a bodyguard following me. Emily and I had bodyguards, but we didn’t know it.”
She licked her lips. “After that night, things got pretty bad. I was the rebellious one, the one who didn’t follow the rules. My parents didn’t blame me, at least not to my face, but I saw how it haunted them. I felt like I owed them so I tried to be everything they wanted me to be.”
“And?”
“And it made them happy. I did everything I was supposed to do. Of course, Emily got angry. She was no longer the only perfect daughter. She even accused me of setting up the kidnapping attempt so I’d get more attention than she would.”
“Sibling rivalry?”
“To the extreme. I thought the competitiveness would disappear when we got older. A few years ago, I realized I wasn’t happy with the person I’d become and I’d lost the real me, so I changed my life. Goodbye perfect daughter, hello black sheep of the family.” Cassandra pressed the crosswalk button. “I thought that would solve my problems with Emily. It had. Until Eric.”
Crossing the street, Troy took Cassie’s hand in his. He didn’t know what else to do.
“Three weeks before Eric and I were to get married, I found him.”
Was Eric lost? Troy didn’t understand. “Found him?”
“In bed, my bed, with Emily.”
In her own bed. How could Emily do that to her own sister, her twin sister? And Eric, the so-called fiancé. Inexcusable.
No wonder Cassie didn’t want to date anyone. She wore her heart on her sleeve. Wainwright had ripped it off and displayed it like a trophy. What an idiot.
Troy wanted to shove his fist down Eric’s throat. “Cassie.”
“I wasn’t spying or anything like that,” she said, as they entered the Stockton-Sutter garage. “I almost wish I had been, but I had no idea. That’s what made me feel so foolish, so stupid. All of the signs were there, but I didn’t see them. Didn’t want to see them.”
Troy kissed the top of her hand. “You don’t have to tell me this.”
“I want to, so you’ll understand.” She squeezed his hand, the simple gesture touching his heart. “That morning, I had forgotten some bills when I left for work. After Moe arrived, I ran home to get the envelopes. I was about to leave when I heard laughter coming from the bedroom. I was so shocked. I almost walked into the room when I saw them, but my feet wouldn’t move. When Eric told Emily he would dump me and marry her, I ran out of the apartment before they saw me.”
The ultimate betrayal. “You never confronted them?”
“No.” Cassie’s lower lip trembled. “I broke up with Eric that night. I moved out of the apartment the next day and donated the bed to a women’s shelter.”
“I thought he broke—”
“So does everyone, including Emily. They waited three months before announcing their engagement. I guess they didn’t want to flaunt it in my face.”
Troy hugged her. Her family thought Eric had dumped her. In some ways he had, but Cassie had had the last word. She would never be any man’s doormat. Troy respected that. “Three months isn’t a long time.”
“It was long enough for them,” she said without a trace of bitterness or regret. “I’ve gotten over Eric. I would never have been happy married to him. I realize that now. He was more interested in working with my father, than loving me. And I never loved him the way I…” Cassie bit her lip.
“Are you okay?”
She nodded. “What Emily did hurt most of all. We’ve always been competitive and different, but I felt so betrayed. We shared my mother’s womb for nine months, you’d think that would count for something.”
Five minutes alone with Wainwright. That’s all Troy wanted. And Emily. Maybe cutting up her charge cards would do the trick. “I wish I could say or do—”
“I don’t want you to do anything,” Cassie interrupted. “I wanted you to know, that’s all. I don’t ever want to get hurt like that again. I don’t think I could handle it. Just like I don’t think I can handle the engagement party.”
Troy raised her chin with his fingertip. “I would never purposely hurt you, Cassie.”
The edges of her mouth turned up slightly. “I needed to hear you say that.”
He brushed his lips against hers. “Then I’ll say it again.”
“About the party?”
The party. He wanted to ask her to change her mind, but he couldn’t. Not tonight, possibly not ever. He needed time to think. Time to understand his growing feelings toward Cassie.
“We can talk about it tomorrow.” Troy paid the parking lot attendant and received an exit ticket. “Right now, I should take you home.”
9
The next morning, Troy sat behind his desk. He’d been reading the same piece of paper for the last twenty minutes, but hadn’t comprehended a single word. Not even the catch phrase “wireless communications” managed to excite him.
For the first time ever, he wanted to take a day off. Call it a mental health day or a vacation day, he didn’t want to work. He wanted to be with Cassie.
Leaning back in his chair, Troy set the letter on his desk. He’d been thinking about Cassie all morning. Thinking he wanted to keep seeing her after they called off their “engagement.” It didn’t make sense, but Troy didn’t care. She might not be perfect, but maybe perfect was overrated. She was beautiful and good for him. With Cassie, he could loosen up, relax. Funny how being with her made him feel free, more alive than ever.
Last night had been only the beginning. She’d opened up to him, sharing her secrets. He wanted to know more; he wanted to know everything about her. Troy didn’t understand his feelings, but he felt an overwhelming urge to protect her. Canceling the engagement party was the only solution.
So what if he missed out on meeting and partying with the movers and shakers of Silicon Valley? There would be time for that later, once he had his partnership.
His phone rang once, signaling an internal call, and he picked up the receiver. “Troy McKnight.”
“Can you come to Mick’s office?” Della, Mick’s secretary asked. “He wants to see you, now.” She emphasized the last word.
“Be right there.” Troy grabbed a notepad and a pen, thankful for the distraction. Mick would get him motivated to do some work.
The door to the office was open. Troy glanced in. Mick stood in front of his desk, dressed in a navy pinstriped suit and flashy purple tie. He smiled, waving him inside. “Have a seat, Troy.”
He sat in a comfortable leather chair. Mick leaned against his desk. “I want to congratulate you.”
Yes. I got the partnership. No reason to have the engagement party now. Troy could tell Cassie to cancel it without a second thought. Both of them would be happy. Troy clenched his hand into a fist and pumped it slightly.
“Of course, my wife wanted to know why I kept your engagement a secret. Heather was thrilled when she found an invitation to your engagement party in our mailbox.”
Damn. No partnership. Yet. “I hope you can come.” He hoped the answer was no.
“We wouldn’t miss it,” Mick said. “Though I was a little surprised. With all the long hours you put in, I didn’t know you were dating anyone, let alone engaged.”
“Cassie understands about my job.”
“I’m sure she does.” Mick grinned. “I’m looking forward to meeting her and so are the other partners.”
“Other partners?”
“They’ll be coming to the engagement party, too.”
Damn. Canceling the engagement party would be tricky, but Troy had to do it. He had to think of Cassie and her happiness. But all the partners? Dammit. “I can’t wait for everyone to meet Cassie, either.”
“Have you set a wedding date?”
“Not yet.” Troy pictured Cassie in a wedding gown and a flower-filled church. He liked the image, including a barefoot bride. Maybe it was time he took life less seriously, lightened up a little. “Maybe April.”
“Keep me posted, will you? Heather’s going to want to know all the details. You know how women are.”
Troy nodded, relieved Cassie wasn’t one of those women who lived for gossip, shopping and weddings.
Mick rubbed his hands together. “How would you like to go with me to visit InterTalk?”
InterTalk? The Austin firm was one of the hottest start-ups around. InterTalk was creating digital imaging and audio technology and group ware—from video conference calls and video chat rooms via the Internet to other collaborative software that had investors salivating. “They turned us down.”
Mick smiled. “That was before we teamed up with Daniels Venture Group.”
Teamed up with Dixon’s group? Troy’s heart fell to his feet.
“Dixon and I had several long telephone conversations recently. He has approached us with a unique opportunity.”
Us? Troy still didn’t feel any relief. His collar seemed to be shrinking by the second.
“He’s giving us the chance of a lifetime, and I want you in on the deal.”
“Thanks.” I think.
“To be honest, Troy. Serious questions have been raised about making you a partner in the new fund.”
It couldn’t get any worse than this. He tugged on his collar.
“Experience counts, but contacts and connections are invaluable.”
It was worse. He swallowed the lemon-size lump lodged in his throat. If he choked to death, he wouldn’t have to worry about the engagement party.
“Of course, none of us knew you had Dixon Daniels in your corner,” Mick said. “And it is something we will take into serious consideration. We don’t want to lose you to Dixon and his group.”
Troy’s partnership wasn’t dead, but he would have to go through with the engagement party. He didn’t have a choice. Surely Cassie would understand. And they would have to be the perfect couple, a couple on parade. Cassie was not going to be happy. Not at all. “I’ve enjoyed working here.”
“Glad to hear it,” Mick said. “Of course, getting married and starting a family are life-altering events, you’ll have to consider all of your options.”
Options? Troy knew one option he had—to return to his parents’ farm. He imagined cold, rainy days, mud and manure-soaked jeans and aching muscles. Returning home meant admitting defeat. “I do have my future to consider.”
“This deal will be a good experience for you, Troy. You’ll be working with me and Dixon.”
Working with Dixon Daniels. It was like a minor leaguer getting batting tips from Barry Bonds. But Troy didn’t feel lucky. He would need to swallow an entire bottle of Tums to make it through the rest of the day.
And what would happen after the engagement party? After he and Cassie were no longer engaged?
Troy imagined butchering a chicken for his mother and harvesting crops with his father. He tried to convince himself it wouldn’t be the end of the world if he had to return to the farm, but couldn’t. If he returned home without making the millions he’d touted about when he left, he would return home a failure. Hell, his life would be a living hell.
Mick cracked his knuckles. “Of course, it’s going to be busy until we leave on Sunday.”
“Long hours don’t bother me.”
“What about your fiancée?”
“Cassie is extremely supportive. She runs her own business and understands the necessity of putting in extra hours.” The words sounded like total B.S. but Mick seemed satisfied.
“She sounds like quite a woman.”
“She is.”
But how would Cassie feel when he told her they couldn’t cancel the engagement party? Maybe flowers would help. He could have them delivered to the bookstore. No, she would see it as a bribe. And it would be. She deserved better.
“Don’t look so worried.” Mick patted Troy’s shoulder. “I’ll have you home in time for your party on Saturday night.”
“Great.” Troy tried to muster some enthusiasm. He should be happy; he should be ready to go. But he wasn’t. Maybe the plane would break down and he wouldn’t make it back in time. Maybe a big earthquake would strike…
“You know, Troy. I always knew you were ambitious, but I didn’t know how badly you wanted it. I considered you our farm boy from Missouri, but I see I was way off base.” Mick chuckled. “Marrying Dixon Daniels’s little girl. I didn’t know you had it in you.”
Neither did Troy.
As the front door to Cassandra’s Attic opened, a bell jingled. Cassandra smiled to greet her customer, but her smile faded when Troy walked in, wearing his navy suit—the one he’d worn the night they’d met.
“Hello.” The sound of his voice covered her arms in goose bumps. She should turn up the heat.
“Shouldn’t you be at work? What are you doing here?” The questions tumbled from her mouth, bypassing her brain. Her cheeks warmed. “What I meant to say is hello.”
Troy’s charming smile m
ade Cassandra sag against the front counter. Could she spell s-w-o-o-n? Or s-t-u-p-i-d?
“The answers to your questions are yes, and I wanted to give you this.” He handed her a white box of See’s candy.
“Thanks.” She opened the box and popped a chocolate into her mouth. Almost as tasty as Troy. Wait a minute. She didn’t want to think about tasting Troy. After a sleepless night of thinking about him and feeling so vulnerable, she’d decided not to see him again. But here he was. Damn him.
“A midday visit during the week and a box of candy?” Something was up. She drew her eyebrows together. “What’s going on?”
He shoved his hand into his pocket and jiggled some change. “Nothing.”
She didn’t buy it. Not with the way he kept glancing around the empty bookstore. “No one is here, except you and me. Don’t tell me you took time from your busy work schedule to make a social call?”
“I have to go to Austin for an important meeting.”
“You came all the way over here to tell me you’re going on a business trip?”
“Yes.” Troy hesitated. “And to say I’ll be back in time for the party Saturday night.”
Was she in the middle of an “X-Files” episode or did Troy suffer a lapse of amnesia? “Don’t you remember what I told you last night? There isn’t going to be an engagement party.”
“Cassie, I heard everything you said, and I was going to tell you to cancel the party, but then I spoke with my boss.” Troy paused. “Mick and the other partners were invited. They’re looking forward to attending. I’m on the verge of getting a partnership. I need to show them I…Cassie, please.”
Back to business. It always came down to his job. No matter how much she wanted it to be different, it wasn’t. Troy wasn’t.
Nothing last night had been real, nothing last weekend, either. Not his mind-blowing kisses. Not the security being in his arms brought her. Not the ease with which she could talk with him. Nothing. And it hurt. Because it seemed real. Because she wanted it to be real.
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