The house white wine was going down, all too quickly and it wasn’t long before I was feeling light headed. Then we went on to a small cocktail bar around the corner from the restaurant and continued drinking. I don’t know why I drank so much. I don’t ordinarily drink a lot, but today had been so emotionally draining. I just wanted to forget about everything. Forget what I am doing to Shawn and our marriage. Forget what I am doing to our girls. Forget the face I wear every day. Forget that I am lying as though it is second nature . . . just forget! So, I drank to do just that, to not think or feel anything!
What followed was a succession of cocktails. Each empty glass numbing my mind a little bit more: vodka martini, appletini, flirtini, vodka sunrise and a couple of woo woo’s for good measure. I only have flashbacks to remind me of Shawn undressing me, feeling his mouth and hands all over my body and us having sex. I distinctly remember throwing up half the night, too. As my purging vomit exited my mouth, I wondered whether all the shittiness, which has been eating away inside of me, has now rid itself down my toilet.
I wake up at 5:00 a.m., ridiculously early for my long day ahead. My head is heavy, my body heavier. I still feel sick and my stomach aches from throwing up so much. I get up and turn on the shower. Stepping into its warmth, I sigh. It feels comforting and washes away the last traces of my drunken birthday evening.
I am actually not looking too bad for someone who is sporting the mother of all hangovers. I dress in a deep plum, above the knee, shaped shift dress with a matching three-quarter sleeved, fitted jacket. I put on my faithful black Mary Janes and I’m good to go. Well, kind of. My head literally pounds with every single step I take down the stairs. Shit, I am never drinking ever again!
“Morning, Babe,” Shawn says, happily making breakfast. The smell of it makes me heave. “You having some breakfast?”
I grimace. “I think I’ll just try to have some toast,” I answer groggily.
“Ouch! That bad, eh?” he asks.
“Why did you let me drink so much, knowing I have a long business trip today?” I gripe.
“Hey, it was your birthday. Besides, you were knocking them back all by yourself, Babe. You needed no encouragement from me.” Shawn laughs.
“Why are you so bloody chirpy this morning, anyway? It is far too early to be in such a good mood.” I grumpily say.
“Because I have finished a long article, I was writing and I got my oats last night, didn’t I?” He looks so bloody pleased with himself, but I’m only left with that empty feeling again.
“At least one of us remembers it,” I say, as he chuckles to himself.
“Oh, I remember it very well.” His satisfied eyes look at me over his coffee cup.
Shit Shit Shit . . . what made it so bloody memorable? I begin to feel uncomfortable and make some toast.
“So, what time do you think you’ll be back tomorrow?” Shawn questions.
“I’m going to check out some shops before getting a train home, so I’ll text you when I’m on the train back.”
“Lydia looked really well yesterday. That Jake guy must be really into her to buy all those bloody flowers.” Shawn says.
“She’s really happy and I’m so pleased for her. We both know her track record isn’t brilliant,” I reply, happy with the change of subject.
“So, it’s getting serious then?” he asks.
“I think it is, yes.”
“Someone’s finally tamed Lydia Mason. That’s no mean feat.” Shawn laughs.
“He’s a lovely guy, too, relaxed and patient. He is good for Lydia,” I tell him.
“So, wedding bells may ring then?”
“Lydia will never marry . . . end of.” I say matter-of-factly.
“Maybe he’s the one?” Shawn wonders.
“Maybe, but she won’t marry him,” I repeat.
“Only time will tell,” Shawn muses.
“Anyway, I can’t eat this toast. I think I’ll go, the fresh air will do me good. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” When I rush up to give Shawn a kiss, he grabs my hand; kissing it, then leans in to kiss my lips . . . hard. I want to get out the door, but as far as Shawn is concerned, I’m enjoying his passionate kiss.
“I’m glad you’ve brushed your teeth,” he laughs. I sheepishly look at him, trying hard to return a genuine smile.
“Oh, God, don’t remind me.” Faint memories of my throwing up half the night flash before me.
“Good luck today, Babe.”
“Thanks, I might need it with this hangover.”
The motion of the train does little to appease my self-inflicted nausea. How the hell will I get through this very long day? The trade fair in Kent is always a busy one. Dread fills me to the brim as I think of the noise and having to be overly nice to everyone, when my head is pounding. I feel like I’ve not slept for three whole days.
Thoughts of my day ahead are gladly interrupted by my mobile.
Morning beautiful ... can’t wait to see you. The driver will be picking you up at 3:30 p.m.
Once you are in London, you will pick up Erin in Balham.
Jonny xxxx
I tap in a speedy reply.
I’m soooo excited
Jessica xxxx
The butterflies flutter around in my stomach and my spirits lift at the thought of seeing Jonny at his home. Maybe I will make it through the day after all.
As predicted, the Kent fair was busy, tiring and very loud. My professional self did very well, hiding the fact she had a humdinger of a hangover, with cheekbones aching from all the smiling she has done. The relief of being picked up by Jonny’s driver is evident as I sit down in the back seat. I mould into it, a heavy sigh escapes my mouth.
“Are you okay, madam?” The young man driving is looking at me from his rear view mirror. He has very short, dark blond hair with attractive chocolate brown eyes. He is cleanly shaven which only enhances his boyish good looks and he has a very pleasant manner. He seems genuinely courteous and polite. I guess he would have to be if he works for Jonny.
“Call me Jessica, I hate being called madam. It’s so bloody formal.” I see his eyes crease upwards as he laughs.
“In that case. Are you okay, Jessica?”
“I’m good, thanks. Well, put it this way . . . I am now! It was my birthday yesterday and I’ve been feeling rather fragile for most of the day.” I smile, looking back at him.
The driver winces. “Hangover and work, never a good combination.”
I roll my eyes with a smirk. “Tell me about it. Sorry, what’s your name?” I ask, leaning slightly forward.
“Simon.”
“It has been a long old day, Simon.” I wearily tell him, relaxing again in my seat.
“Well, we have a bit of a drive so just relax, Jessica.” Making myself comfy, I look out of the tinted window. The outside world passes me by in one continuous tiring blur. I feel my heavy lids getting heavier and heavier and heavier.
I must have dozed off as some time later, I am woken up by the sound of Simon’s voice, talking on his hands free mobile.
“Okay, we will get to you in about fifteen minutes, Miss Laurelson.” I hear him say.
I do feel a little better for the nap in the car but I think I had better freshen up just a little before Miss Sour Puss graces us with her perfect presence. Digging out my life saving doer upper bag. I find my vanity mirror; my much needed blusher and lip-gloss. I touch up my fading make-up with just a few swishes of blusher upon the apples of my cheeks and a sweep of plum lip gloss over my pale lips. Then I brush my hair, which falls naturally and flirtatiously onto my achy shoulders.
I do feel better, but do I look better? I hold the small round mirror in my outstretched arm so I can see my whole face in its reflection and am pleasantly surprised. Jessica Neel, you are restored to glory. I smile to myself.
We pull up outside a contemporary double fronted house. Simon gets out. I watch him as he briskly walks up the red-bricked path to the front door of Miss Sour Puss.
I continue to look on as Erin Laurelson confidently comes out of her door, walking down the path towards the car. As she reaches the door, she actually waits for Simon to catch up with her so he can open it for her. I tut to myself, what a complete and utter bitch of a bloody diva! You work for a celebrity; you are not THE celebrity, I inwardly scold her.
There is something about Erin, I just don’t like. I want to slap that sour face of hers, if only to change her sullen expression. However, what she lacks in warmth she makes up for with style.
Her long, light golden blonde hair is in a high chignon. She is wearing a fitted capped sleeve A-line top in gold with black skinny jeans and a sexy pair of patent stiletto heeled platforms. I mean, she’s a total babe!
“Hello, Jessica.” You can tell it is literally killing her, having to be so nice to me. She speaks like she is about to cough up a bloody fur ball.
“Hi Erin, how are you?” I politely ask.
“Very well, thank you.” There is an uncomfortable pause. I am trying to think of something else to say, while she sits there completely motionless, staring straight ahead. I feel like I am sat with a bloody cyborg!
“So how’s the family, Jessica?” she eventually asks.
I detect the caustic tone in her voice. I sit there, trying not to rise to her bait. Keep calm Jessica; she’s just trying to goad you.
I eventually feel calm enough to answer. “Very well, thanks for asking.” My sarcasm is duly noted by her pursed lips.
“Tell me Jessica, what exactly does your husband think of you being Jonny’s new play thing?” Simon looks at me from his mirror, we make eye contact. He looks panicked. Does he think there is going to be a nasty cat fight in the back of his posh car?
I think carefully before I answer. Inside, I am so fucking incensed. I want to rip her face off and make her wear it inside out, but I can’t lose it. Screaming and shouting at her won’t achieve one damn thing.
I coolly respond instead. “I understand you deal with a lot of Jonny’s business affairs but, you need to know to stay out of my business, Erin.”
“That’s a bit of a problem, though. You, Jessica Neel, have become Jonny’s business; therefore that now makes you my business.” she smugly tells me. Deep breaths Jessica!
I lean forward. “I am only going to tell you this once, stay out of my business,” I slowly inform her, glaring at her with little effect. She continues to just sit there with a punch-worthy sardonic smile on her face. What a fucking bitch!
I glance at Simon who faintly smiles at me. I hope the smile is out of respect for the way I have handled the abrasive Miss Laurelson and not a smile of pity.
“Here, you best put these on . . . now!” She thrusts a bag onto my lap. Inside is a blonde wig and Jackie O style sunglasses. I put them on, feeling slightly ridiculous as we sit there in stony silence the rest of the way. I didn’t have to endure the torture for too long, though.
“Here we are, Jessica. This is Mr. Riley’s home.” Simon pulls up slowly while my heart beats furiously against my breast.
“Thank you, Simon.” He gets out of the car and kindly opens the door for me, followed by Erin. I have to admit; I did love the fact that he chose to open the door for me first. Have that, you caustic cow!
Jonny lives in Chelsea, in a beautiful white-terraced town house, which has been split into two prestigious apartments. There is a black wrought iron railing protecting the front of the house with three cascading steps leading up to the glossy black door. A video security system is visible along with a top of the range intercom. I am feeling nervous and excited. His home is truly stunning from the outside. It is in a very affluent area. The kind of place, I have only ever seen on TV or read about. It feels like I am walking around in some kind of extravagant dream; I haven’t even set foot inside yet.
I am standing behind Erin as she stands beside the intercom. She looks at me, hesitating to press the button then gestures with her hands to allow me to press it. I feel embarrassed and a little out of my depth, but I wasn’t going to let that cow know that.
“By all means Erin, you press the button, please.” She smiles forcefully as she presses it. I hear Beef’s deep voice ask who it is.
“It’s Erin Laurelson and friend.” She overly enunciates the ‘friend’ part. And friend? What a complete bitch! The loud buzz allows us entry.
The hall is cream and spacious. A beautiful wooden, curved stairway leads to Jonny’s apartment, but there is also a lift to the right to take people up. Erin and I walk in frosty silence as we step into it. I quickly take off the wig and sunglasses and begin to preen myself, checking my hair and smoothing down my dress. The reality of where I am suddenly hits me. It’s so different being here, as this is Jonny. This is his lifestyle; miles apart from mine. Meeting in hotel rooms is neutral territory, so I’ve never felt as vulnerable as I do right now.
Erin, with her frosty features, continues to ignore me. That is when my panic truly sets in. It suddenly dawns on me that I am really here. There’s a strong probability that all of his friends are going to hate me, too? My throat constricts at the thought of feeling alone in a place I am not familiar with, in a room full of people who cannot stand the sight of me; miles away from anything I know, or anyone I can call a friend. Maybe Jonny will realise just how different we really are? He will see just how invisible I am in his world. I never thought it possible after last night, but right now, I’d kill for a bloody drink!
When the lift doors open all my fears and heavy weighted thoughts evaporate. There stands Jonny. Wearing a wonderful, welcoming and radiant sexy smile on his face. He nods at Erin, who wanders off into another room.
He looks divine in a V-neck, sage coloured cashmere jumper over a white T-shirt and black fitted jeans. The contrast of the green jumper against his warm skin tone and his sexily tousled brown hair enhance the golden flecks in his hazel eyes.
“Hey, Beautiful. God, I’ve missed you.” He rushes up to hold me in his arms. I hold him back so tightly I almost constrict him. Never before has it felt so good to see him, to finally have him in my arms makes me suddenly feel so emotional.
“Are you okay?” He holds my chin up so he can look directly into my glassy eyes. I have a sudden and overwhelming feeling of longing for this beautiful man before me.
“I have missed you, that’s all.” I tell him sweetly, with emotional blue eyes.
“That’s good to hear, Dimples, but you are here now and I want you to relax, be spoilt and have a good time.”
“I’m sure I will.” I lean into him; I need to have his lips on mine. He kisses me softly. Our bodies merge as one with our tender hello kiss. I just love how he smells and tastes, it’s comforting and reassuring.
“I will give you the grand tour of this place and then you can get ready. Everyone will be arriving at 8:00 p.m. so you have plenty of time.” He excitedly starts to show me around his lavish home, all three beautiful floors of it.
The high ceilings give the impression of more space, and although, most rooms are spacious, they are comfortably sized and homely. The walls are white with solid oak floors throughout. The furnishings and furniture give the home sumptuous depth. Jonny has added splashes of vibrant colour, whether it is from the furniture itself; such as the huge chenille sofas in bright colours, or the different coloured rugs in many of the rooms. The two ground floor reception rooms have large flat screen TVs and the most spectacular marble fireplaces.
The third room on the ground floor is a stunning dining room, which boasts a large round table and chairs to seat ten people. The magnificent room has a huge crystal chandelier hanging as a wonderful centrepiece over the spherical glass table. It is quite simply beautiful.
Different paintings and photographs hang in all the right places. The kitchen is impressively large with an island in the middle. White walls with high gloss units in an off-white colour, yet the matte black accessories on the stainless steel worktops add a striking balance to the minimalistic decor
.
The four bedrooms situated on the middle floor look heavenly in coordinated white bed linen. They are all fitted with the largest mirrored wardrobes I have ever seen and all have en suite bathrooms. The floors are carpeted in a sumptuous cream carpet with the softest looking deep pile rugs in white all around the beds; the kind which make you want to lie down and snuggle into them.
The two guest bathrooms within the apartment are all in glossy white marble with the shiniest silver taps. They have lavish walk in showers and spa baths; large mirrors grace a focal wall to give the illusion of even more space.
On the upper floors, there is a small library and a study decorated wall-to-wall with awards and photographs of other celebrities with Jonny. The gym up there has an outside-decked area built onto it which includes a hot tub. The view up there is quite simply, breath taking; the whole house is breath taking. Jonny Riley is indeed, breath taking.
“Do you like it, Jessica?” Jonny asks.
We stand beside each other looking out at the beautiful view below us, resting against the stone wall, which surrounds the outside decked area. “I am totally speechless. Everything is stunning, it really is, Jonny,” I say in dazed wonderment.
Jonny looks at me and smiles. “I remember when I first came to look at this place. I was just like you, open mouthed and speechless.”
“How long have you lived here?”
“About eighteen months, now. I needed somewhere safer to live. It’s handy too, as it’s close to a lot of places I need to be or get to. It does get lonely though, tinkering about by myself in this big old place.”
“I can’t imagine you ever getting lonely, you are always so busy and usually surrounded by people such as Beef and Erin.” I tell him.
“It’s not the same though, is it?” He looks out at the city and for a moment I actually feel his loneliness. I take his hand and clasp it into mine.
A Famous Affair Page 13
