“I’ll show you both around in a minute. I hope you’ve brought your swimming things as we are going to go into the hot tub later.” I tell them.
“She has brought three! Just how much time she intends to spend in there is anyone’s guess.” Jake squeezes Lydia’s hand playfully.
“I am going to look like a freeze dried lobster, darlings.” We all start to laugh at Lydia’s joke. Oh, I’ve missed my loveably naughty friend!
Jonny is about to show Lydia and Jake around when Simon comes in carrying a load of bags. Lydia apologetically glances at me.
“That is all of your things, darling.” Lydia tells me.
I stare at all of my belongings, shocked to see them. To be reunited with them again, leaves me with very mixed feelings.
“Where do you want me to put it all, Jessica?” A flustered and out of breath Simon asks.
“Pop it into one of the spare bedrooms please, Simon,” I request. He nods. I can clearly see that all of my things have simply been thrown into bags in a hurried and angry way. Eighteen years of my life thrown into a carrier bag with complete disregard and contempt.
I feel everyone looking at me with looks of condolence, pity and sympathy. I take a deep breath and smile. There is going to be no pity party here . . . not today! I can deal with my emotions later. “Right, let’s show you around.” I dismissively say, taking Jonny’s hand. He looks at me with his wonderful and understanding eyes as we start the grand tour of the apartment. I give him a weak and thankful smile for being aware and supportive of my feelings without me having to say one word.
After a wonderful meal courtesy of Mary, we all have fun in the hot tub. Listening to music, relaxing and chatting between the four of us. Jonny and Jake are getting on really well; Jake tells us about some of the places he has travelled to.
We sit there engrossed with envy as he speaks about his visit to Furore, located in the coast of Amalfi in Italy. His breath-taking description of Iguazu Falls on the border between Brazil and Argentina, has us hanging off his every word. Then he beautifully describes the sacred mists of Sanqingshan in China, this has us completely enthralled. I can’t help noticing how Lydia listens to him with adoring intrigue.
From time to time I glance over at Jonny to find him watching me; he smiles, but I can sense something is bothering him. All evening we have been exchanging brief and brooding stares. Not the ‘I want to fuck you’ stares. It is something else . . . something I just can’t seem to put my finger on.
Before I know it, it is past midnight. So we all decide to go to bed as we have a fun-filled day planned for tomorrow. Lydia and I are hitting the shops whilst Jonny and Jake play golf. Then, in the evening we are going out together for dinner.
Lydia plants a soft kiss on my cheek. “Night, darling, thank you for a fabulous evening. It has been fun.”
“I’m glad both of you are enjoying yourselves. Now go and get some rest. We have some serious retail therapy to do tomorrow,” I say, laughing.
“Night, Jessica.”
“Night, Lydia.”
I hear Jonny and Jake chatting in the hall. I leave them to it. Walking up the stairs and back to our bedroom, quietly shutting the door. I know something is wrong with Jonny. I begin to feel impatient while I wait for his slow return. Throughout the course of the evening his lingering and thoughtful glances were only noticeable by me, with Jake and Lydia blissfully unaware of the looks continually passing between us. I felt strangely connected and disconnected with Jonny, all at the same time. I could sense something was laying heavily on his mind but felt unable to say anything in front of Lydia and Jake. Although his eyes were still so full of love, there was something else hiding behind his loving spheres.
I am getting ready for bed in the en suite when he enters the room. He strolls into the bathroom and upon seeing me, he wraps his arms around me from behind, resting his head on my shoulder and looking at our reflections in the mirror. I lean my head onto his and smile, as I continue to take my make-up off. Not for one second, do I take my eyes off his weighted yet handsome face.
“How come you make taking your make-up off look so damn sexy?” Jonny kisses my neck.
I tilt my head back with closed eyes, to bask in the feeling of his sensual kiss. Opening them again, I bring my head back down, looking at him in the mirror wearing a contented smile. “I can’t say I try at all.” I reply in a low voice.
“Well Dimples, that must mean it’s purely because you are too damn sexy.”
I playfully pout. “I aim to please.”
Jonny’s arms tighten around my stomach. “You’ve enjoyed tonight, haven’t you?”
I smile. “I love having Lydia here, yes. It is good to see you and Jake getting on, too.”
“He’s a nice guy. Besides, he loves golf! Always a sure fire way to get me to hang out with someone.” Jonny says with a grin.
“I was rather surprised to discover that he likes golf. I knew you’d be pleased, though.” I reply, affectionately leaning my cheek against Jonny’s neck.
Jonny has a small frown forming across his forehead. “I have to admit, I did wonder whether we would get on or not. From what you have told me about him and his love of the great outdoors. I thought he may want to go bird watching or something.” Jonny snuggles into my neck, his deep laugh echoes all around us. I watch him, as the laughter trails off and his smile begins to fade. When he looks back at our reflections in the mirror, he has the very same haunted look in his eyes he had earlier.
He draws in a long breath, summoning the courage to speak. “You know how much I love you, don’t you Jessica?”
Fuck . . . what is he trying to say? I frantically try to stop my panicked mind from running away with me, just about managing a calm reply. “Yes, I do.”
“I wanted to talk to you about something earlier but you have been having such a great time, I didn’t know whether I should or not?” He waits for a response from me but I just calmly wait for him to continue. He sighs heavily, squeezing me tight. “This is really hard for me because I love seeing you so relaxed and laughing with Lydia, I don’t want to upset you,” he says, looking so terribly conflicted.
My frantic thoughts are now screaming at him! Please put me out of my misery Jonny . . . tell me fucking what?
My arms rest on the top of his that still cradles my stomach. “You are scaring me now . . . what has happened?” I ask with a nervous swallow.
“Jay called me about the film offer from earlier today.”
“Right . . . and?” I ask with a slight smile.
“I definitely have the part. However, it means I would have to go to New York for two months to film it, maybe even three months.” Fuck! I wasn’t expecting that!
I look down at the marble sink. “I see.” Is my only reply. I am trying to think of something else to say but his news has left me speechless for the time being. Jonny rests his chin on my shoulder. His distraught eyes try to engage with mine.
“Talk to me, Jessica. What are you thinking?”
I stiffen in his arms. “I don’t really know what I am thinking, Jonny. I am just trying to take it all in if I’m honest.” I reply in a stunned voice, absentmindedly applying my face cream. I rub it in with numb and detached circular motions, while Jonny grips me tighter.
“Listen, I don’t want to ever put us in jeopardy, Jessica. If you are not happy, then I won’t do it,” he says.
I numbly put away the pot of cream, picking up my hairbrush. Jonny continues to hold me, trying to read my vague expression. I never doubted he wouldn’t get the part, but I never really thought about the possibility of it being filmed elsewhere either. I cannot be the one to stop him. This is who Jonny is; this is what he does for a living. I could never ask him to not take a part on account of us.
“So, when does filming start?” I quietly ask.
“Just after Christmas. I have to fly out then as they want to be ready for filming in the New Year.” He tells me with a wary smile.
&
nbsp; “Will you be out there for the whole time or will you be coming back when you can?”
“Jessica, I was hoping you would join me?” his question lingers in the air between us.
No! No! No! He can’t ask me that! Please don’t ask me that! I carefully put my hairbrush down, bringing my solemn eyes back to his. “You know I can’t, Jonny.” I mumble over an emotional breath.
He lets go of me. Standing up straight now, rubbing his bothered forehead with his hand. “I thought you would say that.”
“I wish I could, Jonny. I really do but I have to consider the girls. I really don’t think that going to New York with you, will do anything to help me in seeing them again . . . do you?”
“I know . . . I know.” Jonny stands behind me with his arms folded, wearing a look of angst. It pains me seeing him so wrapped up in confusion. I turn around to face him.
“You must go, darling. You are an actor. There is no way you can turn this role down. You would be a fool if you did,” I state.
He looks away from me, blowing away a burdened breath. “I can’t fucking stand being away from you for only a few days, the possibility of a few months scares the shit out of me,” he says.
“Don’t you think we are strong enough to do this?” I ask with a pleading hand on his chest.
Jonny tilts his head. “I don’t know, are we?”
“I love you, Jonny Riley, that is not going to change whether you are here or in New York.” Jonny grabs my hand, kissing my palm so tenderly.
“It’s a great opportunity for me, I know that. But if I lose you because of this film, I don’t think I could live with it, Jessica.”
I smile up at him. “You are not going to lose me, Jonny. We will find ways to see each other. Do you think you will be able to come home at all or will you have to stay out there for the whole duration of filming?” I ask.
“I hope to be able to come back if and when the schedule allows.” Jonny replies quietly, still looking downbeat.
“I’ll be able to visit you when I can and we can Skype each other all the time,” I reassure him.
“I suppose.”
Wrapping my fingers behind his neck, I pull him lower so our faces are touching. “We will be okay, Jonny.”
“Are you sure you really are okay with me going and you’re not just telling me what I want to hear?” he asks.
“I think you know me well enough to know that I’ll always speak my mind,” I reply with a convincing smile.
“That may be so, but I need to hear you say it,” Jonny says.
“I really am okay about you going,” I tell him again.
“Are you still going to speak to Lydia tomorrow about returning to work?” He asks, pulling me into him.
I nod. “Yes, I am. I have been thinking about work and how it will affect us in the long run.”
Jonny’s eyebrow rises in interest. “Okay, what are you thinking?”
“I think I am going to ask Lydia about reducing my hours. She is quite fond of the temp she has at the moment. Maybe we can train her up and Lydia will be able to afford her as I’ll be doing less hours?”
Jonny now looks even more frustrated, rubbing his face with an agitated hand. “Now I’m really starting to feel shit about this film. You are reducing your hours, while I’m fucking off to New York for a couple of months.”
I cup his angered face in my hands. “Don’t feel shit, there is nothing to feel shit about. Listen to me. I just need to make myself more available for my girls, Jonny. After thinking things through. I realised that if I return to work and do the same amount of hours. Between you, Lissy and Lottie . . . I will simply be spreading myself too thin,” I admit.
“So how will it work then?” Jonny asks.
“I work one day in the office, staying overnight to see the girls and then come home. I may still have to do the trade fairs and events, but I can get Simon to take me to them. A lot of things I can still do from here, but I will need an office space . . . if that’s okay?”
“Of course it is, why don’t you use the library? I know how much you love that room.”
“Seriously?” I ask with excitement dancing across my eyes. He is right, I really do love that room!
Jonny smiles that delicious smile of his. “Seriously.”
“Oh, that would be perfect,” I say, taking his face into my hands and softly kissing his smiling mouth.
“Am I right in thinking that you have been giving some serious thought about what I said about us and work?” he pauses, stroking a strand of my hair off my face. “I know things will be different now because of New York, but when I’m back it will be good for us that you’ll be doing less hours.” Jonny adds, kissing my forehead.
“I have been quietly mulling it over in my head. Seeing Lydia today, just confirmed to me how much my life has changed. I already knew it had, I just now need to adapt to those changes. The most important things in my life right now, are you and the girls. Work, as much as I love it, will have to take a back seat for a while.” I explain.
“Has Lydia spoken to Shawn or the girls?” Jonny asks, unbuttoning his shirt.
I watch him undress in front of me. Becoming increasingly distracted by his unclothed upper body. “I haven’t asked, but I’m sure she would have said if she had.” I distract myself by quickly brushing my teeth. I walk out of the en suite, needing to distance myself from a now naked Jonny as he also brushes his teeth.
Jonny then gets into bed, pulling the duvet up over his lower half. “I’ve been thinking, too, I think we should get Simon to take you up to see your girls, Jessica. You have been waiting for them to get in touch, but nothing is happening. Maybe it’s time to try and see them yourself?” Jonny watches me get into bed, turning on his side.
I twist around to face him, resting my cheek on my pillow. “If I could see my girls that would be my perfect Christmas present come early,” I quietly sigh at the thought. As happy as I am with Jonny, that happiness is very much tainted without any contact with my girls.
“We will get it sorted out for next week then,” he says, stroking my arm.
“I love you so much,” I say in a loving whisper.
“I love you, too. All night I have been worrying about how to tell you about New York, yet I find myself loving you even more for being so understanding about it,” Jonny says with a gorgeously relieved smile.
“I knew something was up . . . I was waiting for you to tell me.”
“Thank you,” he says, holding my hand with fingers curled over his. He slowly traces his velvet smooth lips across them. “Thank you for loving me and giving us a chance, Jessica. I knew all the hurt and pain would be worth it. Having you lying in front of me, as you are now. Has only confirmed that for me tonight.”
“It had to be worthwhile, Jonny. After all that has happened, being with you just feels so right.” I snuggle closer to him, his warm arms wrap themselves around me. “Now come on, handsome, let’s get some sleep. We have a long day tomorrow.”
I sleepily lie in the arms of the man that I hopelessly love, pushing away any thoughts of New York. I can deal with them another day. Right here . . . right at this moment, I feel blessed being in Jonny’s arms. I know he loves me.
New York or not . . . he loves me.
Jonny and Jake, accompanied by Beef, set off early for a spot of golf in Hertfordshire. Lydia and I have only one thing on our minds . . . shopping! Simon collects us not long after the boys have left. Fortunately, there are only a few photographers outside. I anticipate that they shall soon grow tired and bored of all this hanging around. As Jonny rightly said, we are quickly becoming old news.
“Where you off to, Jessica?” one of them shouts out.
“Just a little shopping, lads.” I smirk at Lydia, whose naughty brow absolutely loves all the press attention.
“Now darlings, be sure to get my best side, won’t you?” I am smiling but shaking my head at Lydia’s playful comment. Simon is amused as he holds the car door o
pen for us.
Sitting in the car, I see Lydia is still working her very best pout, standing beside the car door. “Lydia Mason! Get in the bloody car and stop playing with the press, will you?” She is such a damn tease!
“Jessica, this is the one perk I get to enjoy with you going out with a celeb. I am going to milk it for all it’s worth, my darling.” She slides into the car, but not before beaming and pouting back at the eager photographers one last time.
“Whereabouts are you ladies going shopping today?” Simon asks as he settles himself into the driver’s seat.
“Could you drop us off at Kings Road please, Simon? We are going to shop ’til we drop and then stop for a light lunch somewhere.”
Lydia grins from ear to ear. “How exciting!”
I swivel in the car seat, to look at Lydia. “That’s not all. I have booked us in to have a champers and nail polish at a salon nearby. It’s our treat to you for how wonderful you were all the time that I was in the hospital.”
She takes my hand. “As grateful as I am, darling, there really is no need.”
“There’s every need and dinner tonight is part of the treat, too,” I say.
I am surprised to see Lydia’s cheeks coyly redden. Her beautifully stained red lips, curl up with a delighted smirk. “I could get used to all this indulgent spoiling, you know?”
“I want to give something back to you by way of a very big thank you, Lydia,” I say.
“Seeing you happy is thanks enough, Jessica.”
I smile at her lovely words. “I am loving having you here, I really am. Isn’t it great our men are getting on, too?” I ask, sitting back more comfortably.
“It’s a relief, darling; that’s what it is. Jake was really worried he wouldn’t have anything in common with Jonny. He found it difficult to see beyond the whole fame thing, but after spending the evening with Jonny; he hasn’t stopped talking about him. I think it’s the start of a beautiful bromance.” Lydia laughs.
A Famous Affair Page 28
