Broken Course

by Aly Martinez

  "Then ask her about the necklace. Don’t let her brush it off as nothing. Everyone in Sarah’s life has known her for years. I think someone finally needs to hear her side of the story without the clouds of the past fracturing her truths. Someone needs to finally know that woman standing in the parking lot right now."

  "See, right there. That’s a big part of the problem I’m having right now. That woman standing in the parking lot shouldn’t be out there at all. She should be sitting in here, laughing and eating chocolate cake. I think your heart is in the right place, but this shit is seriously fucked up. It’s her birthday. Why would you even give her that necklace tonight?"

  "What? Are you kidding me?" Emma asks in awe.

  "Hell no, I’m not kidding," I snap.

  "All right. That’s enough. You need to calm the hell down and watch how you talk to my wife."

  "Right. Of course. Well, I’m going to extend you the same courtesy. Watch how you talk about my woman. It doesn’t sit well with me that we are even having this conversation tonight. You should have talked to Sarah about what she feels comfortable telling me. I shouldn’t be privy to anything about her until she’s ready to tell me. Now I’m suspicious. Where does that leave the two of us? What’s if she’s not ready to talk yet, but I can’t stop asking questions?"

  Hypocrite. Fucking. Hypocrite. But Christ, this is too much.

  I didn’t seek out information about Sarah. And I feel guilty as shit that I know about her past—but not guilty enough to tell her.

  "Just so you know, I’m smitten with her too. I’m not blind. I know she’s keeping some things to herself, and I appreciate you looking out for her, but I think it’s up to her when she wants to open up."

  "She won’t ever tell you! She has you so high up on a pedestal, Mr. Perfect."

  "I’m not perfect." I quickly correct.

  "Maybe not, but she sees you that way. You don’t understand. You weren’t here when things went down."

  "No, but I’m here now." I push to my feet and dig some money from my wallet. "Dinner’s on me. I’m sorry if I’ve come off as an asshole tonight, but I’m not going to just sit around while Sarah gets bashed."

  "Who the fuck was bashing her?" Emma defensively jumps to her feet and shakes off Caleb’s arm as he tries to restrain her. She’s not yelling, but her reaction is definitely drawing attention.

  "No one as long as I have anything to say about it," I answer matter-of-factly.

  "I all but kicked her out the door for y’all’s first date." Emma steps around the table with Caleb sliding out behind her. "She’s my sister and she hasn’t exactly had the easiest road the last few years. And when she showed even the tiniest bit of interest in you, I pounced. I fully expected her to hate you—come home with some terrible story about what a cocky douche you were… And after this little outburst, I can’t say I was wrong in that assumption. However, Sarah is enamored by you. And if you left because of her past, I’m not sure how that would affect her. Jesus, all I’m saying is if you break up with her, do it because she’s a bore or lazy in bed—not because of her past. If you care about her at all, you will recognize that I’m only looking out for her."

  "I don’t need you to remind me that none of us are perfect. Not Sarah. Not you. And certainly not me. Emma, I do recognize that you’re trying to help. But what you aren’t taking into account is that I’m doing the same damn thing. I just have a very different opinion on what help looks like. She’s your sister, but I care about her too."

  "That’s really good to hear." She crosses her arms over her chest.

  "I’m going to get Sarah," I announce over my shoulder as I walk away, dismissing any further conversation.

  When I push open the door, I suck in deep, filling my lungs with the cool, crisp air I hope will calm me down. I glance around, searching for Sarah, but don’t see her anywhere. Once I walk to the side closest to the parking lot, I find her sitting on a bench. She’s leaning over and her hair is curtaining her face. Damn it, I hate seeing her this upset. Why the fuck did they give her that necklace tonight? It ruined everything.

  "Sarah," I say quietly so as not to scare her.

  Her head snaps up, and I swear, for a minute, every planet orbits around her. I have never in my life seen a smile so breathtakingly genuine. It doesn’t show just on her gorgeous mouth; it radiates through her entire body. Damn it if Emma wasn’t right. She’s so fucking happy. I fully expected her to be a wreck, but she’s anything but right now.

  "Hey." She slides over an inch and pats the bench next to her.

  "You’re beautiful," I tell her, knowing it’s not nearly enough.

  "Yeah, I’m sure I look amazing right now. Is my eye makeup running?" She sweeps a thumb under her eyes, holding the open box tight in her other hand.

  "Nah, you’re good." I drape my arm around her shoulders and pull her into my side.

  She cuddles in close and lets out a content hum. "I think this is the best birthday I’ve ever had."

  "Really?"

  "You have no idea how much this means to me." She uses a finger to toy with the heart charm.

  "You want to tell me about it?" I look down questioningly.

  "Yeah. I think I do." She smiles then kisses me softly on the lips. "You want to take a stroll with me?"

  "Sure. Where we going?"

  "Memory lane." She stands up, dragging me up with her. "Will you put this on me?" She lifts the necklace from the box and very carefully hands it to me.

  I fasten it around her neck, finishing with a wet kiss on her shoulder.

  "Let’s go back in. I need to ask Caleb something."

  "I may have screwed up and showed my ass," I tell her awkwardly.

  "What?"

  "I got pissed that they gave you that tonight. I thought it upset you on your birthday." I decide to leave out the rest of the argument. "It appears this is one of those very rare occasions in which I’m wrong."

  "Very rare, huh?" She begins laughing—and not because she heard something funny. She’s straight up laughing at me.

  "Extremely."

  "Aw, did you get upset because someone made me cry?" she questions in a mocking baby voice.

  "I’m serious, Sarah. I was pissed."

  She wraps her arms around my waist and starts laughing again. "Oh God. What did you say?"

  "I don’t even remember exactly. But I’m pretty sure I called you my woman and pissed on someone’s leg."

  "Damn. I would have loved to see you go head-to-head with Caleb. I’m actually really sorry I missed that." She folds over in hysterics.

  "Sarah, stop," I say seriously then burst out laughing right alongside her. "Caleb didn’t even have a chance to say anything. Emma had it all covered."

  "Oh, well, she probably deserved it then. She’s always trying to get up in my shit. I think she forgets that she’s my baby sister sometimes."

  "She called me a cocky douche." I feign injury and Sarah laughs even louder.

  "Damn it. Why do I always miss the good stuff?"

  "I’m glad you find this entertaining."

  "I absolutely do. Now, come on, tough guy. Time for round two."

  I let out a groan as she pulls me toward the restaurant door.

  "THANK YOU so much." I throw my arms around Caleb’s neck the second we get back to the table. I can tell that he doesn’t know how to react, but he finally gives me an awkward hug.

  "You’re welcome. I’m really sorry I didn’t give it to you sooner."

  "No, really, today was the perfect time." I look down to see Emma’s prideful grin. I’m one hundred percent positive that giving me this tonight was not Caleb’s idea. I reach up, clench the necklace in my palm, and mouth, "Thank you," to Emma.

  She replies with a wink.

  "I think I may have overreacted," Leo says, extending a hand to Caleb.

  He smirks and shakes his hand. "I’ve done worse."

  Leo turns to Emma, but before he can even open his mouth, she smacks him
on the arm.

  "You are really lucky that I like overprotective assholes."

  Leo nods and Emma and I both bust out laughing.

  "Hey, any chance we can swing by tonight and get that box?" I ask as we start gathering our stuff to leave.

  Emma’s eyes go wide and flash to Leo. "Yes!" she exclaims loudly.

  I give her a suspicious look, but she shrugs and rushes out of the restaurant.

  AFTER A brief stop by Leo’s apartment to drop off the bike and pick up his car, we headed over to Emma and Caleb’s house. Much to my dismay, their little boy, Collin, was sound asleep when we got there. I did, however, sneak in and give him a kiss even though Emma threatened me with my life if I woke him up. Thankfully, the little guy didn’t move a muscle.

  There didn’t seem to be any lingering awkwardness between Leo, Caleb, and Emma. But I could definitely feel them exchanging quite a few knowing glances as we left. The box of Manda’s belongings was a lot bigger than I’d expected. I had no idea that Caleb still had this much of her stuff. I feel like a kid in a candy shop tonight.

  There was a day not too long ago where I couldn’t have imagined smiling while reminiscing about Manda. Back then, I was struggling with handling all the guilt. Her death still hurts, and I don’t think you can ever really let go of someone you loved when they die so suddenly and way too soon. However, I’m in a good place right now, so this is a treat, not a punishment like it would have been a few years ago. The truth is that, if Caleb had given me Manda's necklace at any other time, it would have killed me. But as I ride back to Leo’s apartment with his hand wrapped tight around mine, the gold around my neck doesn’t burn.

  "Come on. I’ll carry it up," Leo says, taking the box from my hands.

  "Thanks," I respond as he drags a keycard over the sensor to unlock his private entrance to the stairs.

  "Here. Put this in your purse. Now I won’t have to let you up every time you come over." He hands me the card.

  "Are we exchanging house keys?" I squeal sarcastically.

  "Uh, no," he responds with a lopsided grin. "It’s a keycard so you can park down here when you come visit. It’s safer than parking on the street."

  "Is that why you always pick me up instead of just letting me drive over here?"

  "Yep. And now, you can park and make it all the way up to my door. I’m not giving you an apartment key until I’m absolutely certain you won’t randomly sneak into my bed naked at night. Wait, change of plans. I’ll get you a key made tomorrow." He waggles his eyebrows suggestively.

  "No, don’t do that. I’m not sure I want you to have one of my keys. What if you come over on a nonscheduled night and catch me with my other boyfriend?"

  He narrows his eyes at me. "A nonscheduled night, huh?" He nods. "All right. Looks like I’m going to be dropping by your place unannounced randomly this week."

  "Oh, the torture! How will I ever manage knowing you could just show up at any time?"

  "I find out you got another man, Sarah, and I’m going to end up in jail for killing him. You aren’t the only one who doesn’t share well," he says as we ride the elevator up to his apartment. It’s a short trip since he only lives on the third floor.

  "Oh, shut up. You know I was kidding."

  "I know, ángel." His arms are preoccupied with holding the box, but that doesn’t stop him from leaning down and smacking his lips, asking for a kiss—one I’m more than willing to give.

  "So we’re really going to Puerto Rico next weekend?" I ask as we walk to his door.

  "Absolutely. I got a room right on the beach in San Juan. It’s going to be amazing. I haven’t been on vacation in at least five years. I should be thanking you for having a birthday and giving me an excuse to take my girl somewhere relaxing."

  "Thank you, Leo. Tonight…" I trail off when words fail me.

  The truth is that I don’t actually have the words at all. This night was more than I could have ever even hoped for. However, I know, the moment we walk through that door, it’s time to come clean. I need to tell Leo about the wreck. I need to tell him about Manda, Casey, and even Brett. One baby step at a time though.

  I’m not going into details about after the accident tonight. I’m just not there yet. I should absolutely tell him, without question, but that would mean risking him. I can’t take that chance. I can’t gamble with Leo. Waiting will make it worse—I’m well aware of this. But I’m just not ready to let him go. Then again, I have a feeling I’ll never be ready for that.

  "Where do you want me to put this?" he asks when we walk inside.

  "Do you have carpet anywhere?" Leo’s floors are all beautiful hardwood, but right now, I want to take my shoes off, put on some pajamas, sit on the floor, and introduce Leo James to Manda Baker.

  "The rec room is carpeted," he answers with a confused tilt of his head.

  "In there then." I smile as butterflies take up occupancy in my stomach.

  The nerves sneak up on me from out of nowhere. It must show, because Leo puts the box down on the couch and folds me into a hug. It’s a good one too. I swear his hugs could be the solution to world peace.

  "You don’t have to do this tonight," he whispers.

  "No. I want to," I respond, nuzzling up against his scruff. "I want to get comfortable. Can I wear one of your T-shirts? I like the way they smell."

  Suddenly, he releases me and steps away. He pulls the fitted, black T-shirt off his back and hands it to me. I begin laughing and he smiles.

  "Well, that wasn’t exactly what I meant. But it’ll work."

  "Get comfortable, ángel. I’ll put this in the rec room." He loops an arm around my lower back and pulls me in for a hard kiss. It’s not passionate or heated—it’s reassuring and exactly what I needed to soothe my nerves.

  A few minutes later, I walk into Leo’s rec room wearing his black T-shirt and a pair of pink pajama shorts I stashed in his drawer at some point over the last few weeks. He’s reclining on the large leather sofa with a book in his hand and a beer at his side. He’s gotten comfortable too. He’s wearing a pair of gray workout pants and a white tank top. I’ve come to know this outfit as Leo’s pre-sleep attire. Because the minute he climbs into bed, he strips completely naked.

  I flop down on the couch at his feet and suck in a deep breath.

  "You’re strange."

  He looks up from the book with a humor-filled expression. "If, by strange, you mean insanely sexy, then yes, I would have to agree with you." He smirks.

  I roll my eyes. "I love how humble you are."

  "Why am I strange?" He sits up and places his book on the table next to him.

  "Because you don’t pry. I broke down sobbing tonight and you haven’t asked a single question about the necklace or the box."

  "Caleb told me it belonged to your best friend who passed away. I don’t need to know the rest. You’ll tell me when your ready."

  This man.

  I swallow hard, but not because I’m nervous to talk about the wreck. I’m touched by how simple Leo makes everything. Nothing is messy or scary. It almost makes me want to tell him everything. Almost.

  "Well, I think I’m ready."

  "I’m listening, ángel." He reaches out and grabs my hand, intertwining our fingers before kissing my knuckles.

  Here we go.

  SARAH TAKES a deep breath and squeezes my hand tight. I’m desperate to hear this story. This could be the moment where she tells me everything, where she lays it all out, and the secrets I’ve been keeping about knowing her past become null and void. This could be the beginning of something real. She’ll still probably be pissed that I didn’t tell her the truth earlier, but I doubt she’ll flip. How can she be pissed if she’s willing to tell me herself?

  "Seven years ago, I was in a car accident. My best friend and Caleb’s fiancée was killed. Her name was Manda Baker. She was my other half. We met in college and just clicked from day one. We were inseparable. I’m not exaggerating when I say we talked probably t
wenty times a day. Casey made our duo a trio about six months later when she moved in across the hall from us. The three of us did everything together. But while I love Casey, there was just always something special about the bond Manda and I shared.

  "When she died, it ruined me. I was dealing with some other issues in my life at the time. Caleb was in a bad spot too, and his anger got the best of him. He blamed me for some of the circumstances that led up to Manda’s death. He went so far as to say I was driving drunk. Which I wasn’t!" she quickly corrects.

  I nod and brush the hair away from her face, purposely dragging my fingers across her neck in the way that I’ve found calms her. She leans in toward my hand and tears begin to sparkle in her eyes.

  "The necklace?" I ask to encourage her.

  "Manda and I got it one drunken night while we were in Vegas on a girls’ trip. It was just something silly. They were cheap and nothing fancy, but we pooled our slot winnings because we just had to have them. They started out as a joke, but neither one of us was willing to take them off. She used to play with it when she worried about stuff." The tears finally begin to slide down her cheeks. "Anyway, after Manda passed away, Caleb and I had a bit of a run-in over that necklace. It ended with him throwing it in his front yard. I searched for hours but never found it. I thought it was gone forever. I had no idea he ever recovered it."

  "What a dick," I mumble.

  Sarah barks out a strangled laugh. "He really is, but he’s a good guy. He was struggling just like I was. He missed her a lot. Caleb was a mess for years until he met Emma." She waves off the comment. "But that’s a different story. So yeah. That box is what’s left of her stuff. I’d really like it if you’d hang out with me while I go through it."

  "Of course," I quickly answer.

  "Thank you." She leans forward and places a brief kiss to my mouth before moving to the floor.

  Damn it. That was certainly the abridged version of her story. No brain injury. No husband. No suicide attempts. No Casey revelation. No court-mandated therapy. No Sarah. She actually didn’t tell me about herself at all—she gave me Manda’s story and nothing more. And just like that, any hope I had of the truth coming out tonight vanishes. I guess it’s a step in the right direction, but damn. I had high hopes for this conversation. Selfish hopes, but high nonetheless.