Broken Course

by Aly Martinez

  We exit the room, still laughing. Caleb and Hunter flash us knowing smiles when we meet up with the guys in the kitchen. Leo gives me a puzzled look when I stop in front of him.

  "Everything okay?" he asks, draping an arm around my waist.

  "Yeah, it’s great. Oh, but stay away from Kara. She makes us look like the definition of sanity."

  "Um. Okay?" he says as more of a question than an answer.

  Hunter walks over and pats Leo on the back. "Welcome to the group, my man."

  "SARAH! WHERE is my new client notebook?" Leo asks, walking into the security room-slash-office.

  "The same place it always is. Top drawer on the left," I respond from behind the company laptop.

  I’ve been working for Leo for the last six weeks. And when I say "working for," I mean trying to get him organized. How the hell this man has been running a successful business is beyond me. The day I started, Johnson walked in with a yellow sticky note covered in numbers. When I asked him what the hell it was, he told me that was how he turned in his time to Leo.

  Head. Exploded.

  I thought I was laid back about proper business practices, but a Post-it note time card? Really? Leo has thousands of dollars’ worth of high-tech security equipment, but his client list was handwritten in a spiral notebook. It was almost comical.

  "No," he drawls. "That’s the old notebook. I’ve asked you to add at least twenty people since it was last updated. None of them are in there. Fuck, please tell me you added them. Those were some big-name clients, and now I have no way to reach them."

  "Oh! The new one. It’s in your phone. I added them all to a spreadsheet then merged it with the contacts on your phone."

  "Seriously?" he asks, surprised.

  "Yes, seriously. I can’t believe you had a freaking notebook to begin with. Aren’t you Mr. Technology?" I ask, leaning back in the chair, propping my feet on the desk.

  He gives me a slow, sexy smirk. "Yes, but I’m not Mr. Time. I’ve been doing this alone for a year now." He walks around the desk and sits on the corner. "What else have you been up to?" he asks, running a hand up my thigh.

  "Well, the guys now have time cards. They’re still handwritten though. You need to figure out a way to allow them to clock in and out remotely. There has to be an app or something for that. Because I’m really sick of importing all that shit every week. You have too many guys now. It takes me forever."

  "Okay, ángel. No need to get feisty. I’ll figure something out." He leans in and kisses me.

  This might be the only perk of the job. Leo wasn’t lying. He really does pay for shit, but it’s still more than I was making at the newspaper.

  "Mmm. You want to do lunch in bed today?" I stand up and wrap my arms around his neck. Yeah. Lunchtime quickies are definitely a perk.

  "I am pretty hungry." He sucks my bottom lip into his mouth before raking his teeth across it.

  "I have something you can eat." I’m guiding his hand under my dress just as the phone begins to ring. I let out a groan and he chuckles against my lips. "Guardian Protection Agency," I say when I pick up the phone, but I’m greeted by the sound of a dial tone.

  "It’s the TV, Sarah." He clicks a button on the computer to answer the incoming call.

  Erica flashes onto the screen, but her face is twisted in pain. "I can’t find Slate. My water just broke," she moans, and Leo jumps to his feet.

  "Shit. Hang on, babe. Where’s Johnson?" he asks, but Erica doesn’t answer.

  Supporting herself on the arm of the couch, she shakes her head.

  He moves to the screen of monitors and brings up the inside of Erica’s house. One by one, he goes through each room, looking for any sign of Slate or Johnson. For the last few weeks, Johnson has been staying in Indianapolis so he can be there when Slate goes to train the kids at On The Ropes. They never leave Erica alone. Someone has to be there.

  Not a second later, Leo locates both Slate and Johnson laughing in the basement gym.

  "Andrews!" he calls over the intercom and Slate’s head snaps up. "Get your ass upstairs. Your wife’s having a baby."

  "What?" Slate responds, but he takes off at a dead sprint with Johnson right behind him.

  Leo tracks Slate through the house until he reaches Erica. Slate immediately scoops her off her feet and hauls ass toward the front door. Erica screams out just as he gets to the door, and I swear you can see the pain move through Slate’s face as well. It might be twisted, but it makes me smile.

  "He really loves her," I say to Leo as he watches them peel out of the driveway.

  "Yeah. He does. You want to go to Indy with me or stay here?" His voice is void of emotion as he begins shutting down all the monitors.

  "I’ll go. Let me grab some stuff. You want me to pack you some clothes too?" I ask just as Leo turns to face me. His eyes are nervously flashing around the room and his chest is heaving. "Jesus, are you okay?"

  "Um, yeah," he confirms, but he looks anything but okay.

  "Leo, she’s not dying. You know that, right? She’s just having a baby."

  "Yeah, I know. It’s just…hearing her scream. I…um… Fuck, it just brings back some shit. That’s all." He shoves a rough hand in his hair and strides out of the room. As he heads for the hall bathroom, I decide to give him a few minutes to collect himself.

  I quickly pack an overnight bag for both of us before going to the kitchen to make a few sandwiches for the road.

  "How long does that labor shit last?" he nervously questions, suddenly appearing behind me.

  "It all depends. If we leave now, I bet we can make it before she has the baby."

  "No. I don’t want to be there for that. I can’t listen to her scream. I’ll lose it. I, um…" His voice cracks and it cuts me deep. He reaches up and grabs the back of his neck. "I can’t be there, Sarah. I…I just can’t." His chin quivers, exposing exactly how much this is affecting him.

  "Leo," I breathe, dropping the mayo-covered knife and rushing in his direction. I throw my arms around his waist and desperately try to offer him the same comfort he always provides me.

  "I know this isn’t rational. But my whole body is thrumming because she might be scared right now and I’m not there to fix it. Shit…" His hands begin to tremble and he nervously cracks his neck. "I also know that, if I were there, I’d be tearing the hospital apart trying to get to her."

  "She has Slate. She’s not alone," I try to reassure him.

  "I get that. But that doesn’t make the instinct to protect her any less consuming."

  "Okay, so what do you want to do? Go or wait? I’ve never actually had a baby, but I don’t think it’s as dramatic as they make it out to be in the movies. We could always just drive to Indy and check into a hotel until she has him. That way we are close by but you won’t end up brawling with a doctor."

  "Yeah. That sounds like a plan."

  A few minutes later, Leo walks silently to my car after I inform him that I’m driving. He doesn’t argue, nor does he eat any of the food I packed. About an hour into the trip, he reaches over and grabs my hand, giving it a tight squeeze.

  "I’m sorry. I get a little wigged out about her sometimes," he apologizes, bringing my hand to his mouth.

  "This probably isn’t the best time to ask this, but you know me…so I’m going to ask it anyway. Have any of your therapists ever mentioned that you might have some form of PTSD from the events of that day?"

  "Yeah. They have," he responds quietly, but he doesn’t elaborate. He goes back to silently staring out the window.

  Another hour later, Leo’s phone chirps in his lap. He picks it up and lets out a loud relieved laugh. He turns the phone to me, revealing a picture of Erica smiling while holding a tiny baby with thick, brown hair. You can’t really see the baby, but God bless Slate for knowing exactly which face Leo really needed to see.

  As we continue our trip, Leo glances down at the picture several times. His mood significantly lightens as well. Holding my hand tight against h
is thigh, he even leans over to give me a few kisses. About ten minutes from the hospital, he asks me a question of his own.

  "Do you want kids?"

  My head snaps to his. "Um, I don’t know. I mean, I always planned to have a family. It’s just things haven’t exactly worked out that way. Plus, I’m getting older, so I’m just not sure it’s in the cards for me anymore."

  "Sarah, you’re thirty-five. You’re not too old to have kids."

  "Well, ‘I don’t know’ is still my answer. What about you?"

  "I just don’t see how I could ever have anything to offer a kid. I just freaked the fuck out over Erica giving birth. Can you imagine what a whack job I would be as a dad?"

  "I think you’d be a great dad. That’s kind of how I think you treat Erica already. It’s weird in some ways but really freaking sweet in others. My dad was this big, tall, quiet guy. He loved me and Emma more than anything in life, but he was never that over-the-top, don’t-touch-my-daughter-or-I-kill-you type of dad. However, I can see you being that way. Cleaning guns in the living room when her fifth-grade boyfriend comes over to play." I laugh, but Leo just turns to stare back out the window. "I’m okay with no kids, Leo. In case you were worried about that."

  He nods and squeezes my hand but doesn’t say anything else.

  "YOU WANT to hold him?" Erica asks.

  "No, babe. I’m good," Leo declines while staring down at Adam Slate Andrews wrapped up in a blanket sleeping in his bassinet.

  "Can I?" I ask when I’m not able to resist any longer.

  "Of course," Erica answers warmly.

  Stepping around Leo, I lift all eight pounds of baby Adam into my arms and cradle him tight against my chest. "He’s gorgeous," I say, lifting his tiny hand from under the blanket.

  As shameful as it may be, jealously immediately creeps into my heart. I was supposed to have this. I’m thirty-five years old. I shouldn’t be starting over from scratch. I should have a baby with my blue eyes…or maybe even chocolate-brown. I glance up to find Leo watching me intently. I try to give him a forced smile, but it only makes the tears spill from my eyes.

  Leo walks behind me, wraps his arms around my waist, and drops his chin to my shoulder. "You okay?"

  "He’s just really cute," I half lie, wiping the tears from my eyes.

  "I love you," he whispers into my ear, making the world right again.

  The fact is that, if I had a school of kids running around my feet right now, I wouldn’t have Leo. No matter how fucked up it may be, in this moment, I’m thankful for the broken course that led me to here. All of the wrongs somehow feel right. And if Leo James is all I ever get, I can honestly still say that this life would be an absolute win.

  "I love you, too." I turn my head and find his lips for a brief but no less meaningful kiss.

  "He looks like you," Leo tells Slate.

  "He does. Poor kid." Slate settles on the tiny hospital bed next to Erica.

  "All right, Mr. Andrews. I’ve told you twelve times. That bed has a weight limit," a nurse says, walking in the room.

  "I’ll buy you a new one," Slate responds, not budging an inch.

  "Okay, everyone. I need to check on our new mom now, so I’ll need you all to step out into the hall for just a minute. Out you go."

  "I’m not going anywhere," Slate growls.

  "Oh lord, I don’t mean you, Dad." She tosses him a sugary-sweet grin only to roll her eyes when she turns to face us.

  "We’ll be outside." Leo reaches, forward squeezing Erica’s foot, while Slate takes Adam from my arms.

  "So, gift shop?" I ask as soon as we exit the room.

  But Leo’s hands are suddenly in my hair. His mouth slams over mine as he pushes me up against the wall, stroking his tongue against mine. Screw the fact that we are standing in public—I meet his every thrust.

  "Cásate conmigo," he says against my lips. "No quiero ninguna parte de esta vida sin ti. Fuistes, mi ángel. Despues mi cielo y ahora necesito que seas mi todo."

  "Are you talking dirty?" I whisper, laughing.

  "It might just be the dirtiest thing I’ve ever said." He leans away and tosses me an insecure smile. "Thank you for coming with me, ángel."

  "You’re welcome. I’m glad to be here." I give him a tight hug.

  We stand in the middle of the hospital hallway holding each other. It’s nothing overly sexy like it was a few minutes ago. It’s just comfortable. It’s Leo.

  When the door swings open, Slate comes walking out with the nurse.

  "I’m going to get some coffee. Can you sit with her for a minute?" he asks Leo.

  "Oh, coffee sounds great. I’ll go with you." I smile and pat Leo’s arm. He needs a few minutes alone with Erica, and it doesn’t appear that Slate is going to leave her side often.

  "Grab me some too." He kisses my forehead before going back into Erica’s room.

  "So, how bad did he flip the fuck out earlier?" Slate asks as soon as the door clicks.

  "Um, well…it wasn’t terrible. But seeing her in pain really affected him," I respond evasively. I feel bad talking about Leo behind his back, but I don’t exactly want to hide his struggles from the people who love him either.

  "Right." He nods, not bothering to look at me. "Did Leo ever tell you that I used to have a real issue with their relationship?"

  "No," I answer shortly. I’m unsure, yet very concerned, about where this conversation might be headed.

  "Well, I had a big problem with it at first. I’ve heard Leo told you about their past." He glances over at me questioningly.

  "He did." I once again give nothing away.

  "Come on, Sarah. You have to admit it’s a weird friendship they have." He stops walking and turns to face me. His expression is kind, but his words are starting to annoy me.

  "No. I don’t think it is. Sometimes, your only choice is to stick to the people who truly understand. It’s easier than opening up to those who don’t." I lift an eyebrow with a little attitude, causing Slate to grin.

  "Is that why you and Leo are together?" he asks bluntly.

  My eyes snap to his. I guess it’s not surprising that Slate and Erica know about my past as well. To hear Leo tell it, I had a big impact on his life back then. But his question still catches me off guard.

  "I…uh…" I stutter, not exactly sure how to answer. I like to think that our pasts aren’t the only reason we are together. However, it might be the reason I truly fell in love with him. He gets me and accepts me for who I am. God, I love him for that.

  "Leo needs you."

  "No, he doesn’t, but I’m more than happy to stay anyway," I inform him.

  Slate’s smile widens a fraction of an inch, and I decide to close the conversation.

  "Erica and Leo’s relationship is unconventional, but it’s real. I think, fifty years from now, they will still be close. And it’s not because they have some twisted dependency on each other. I don’t disagree with you that it might be how it started, but every day, I think it evolves. In my eyes, they are just two people who bonded over a shared experience, but isn’t that how all friendships start? Just because it was something ugly that brought them together doesn’t make the bond any less pure." I begin to walk away.

  I didn’t exactly intend to be a bitch with my parting words, but I have a feeling that’s exactly how it came off. Slate struck a nerve with this conversation though. I’m well aware of how Erica and Leo feel because my relationship with Casey has been scrutinized by everyone who knows our story. This all just hits a little too close to home for me.

  I hear Slate bark out a laugh from behind me as I march away. With one giant step forward, he catches up and grabs my arm to stop me.

  "Sarah, I agree with you now. So stop getting upset. This isn’t what I was trying to say at all. You have no idea how fucking happy it makes me to hear you say all this. The truth can be a little overwhelming with those two, and I wanted to make sure that it doesn’t intimidate you. I like you with Leo. I think you are really go
od for him. I just wanted to make sure your head was in the right place and you don’t view Erica as some sort of competition."

  "No, not at all. I mean, maybe I did that first night I heard them on the phone together," I say sheepishly.

  "I can’t blame you there, but you have no idea what a relief it is for me to hear all this from you. See, if you give Leo hell about spending time with Erica, she’s going to, in turn, give me hell about…well everything." He scratches the back of his head.

  "I promise. I’m okay with all of it. You don’t need to worry about me." I smile reassuringly and it seems to sink in.

  "Okay, coffee. Come on. My treat." He holds the hospital cafeteria door open and motions for me to enter.

  Two weeks later….

  "WHAT DO you think about moving in with me?" I ask Sarah over the computer during our Thursday night chat. Broaching this topic over a video chat while I’m in LA is probably not my most romantic move, but I couldn’t wait any longer.

  I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now. We stay together most nights, but a few times a week, she goes home to clean her apartment or get more clothes. Slowly, the contents of her closet have been trickling their way over to my place. First, it was just some shampoo and pajamas. But it gradually became more. Now that she’s working for me, it’s not too hard to convince her to spend the night at my place.

  "Seriously?" she asks, surprised.

  "Yeah, seriously," I laugh. "Don’t look at me like that."

  "Leo, we haven’t been seeing other each that long."

  "You planning on breaking up with me anytime soon?" I ask, leaning back against the bed, suddenly wishing I hadn’t blurted this out tonight. I’ll be home tomorrow. I should have done it then when I could have coerced her with my body. Mmm, her body.

  "I don’t know. I like to keep my options open," she responds sarcastically.

  "You know what I like for you to keep open? Your legs. Jesus, I can’t wait to get home."

  "Focus, Leo. Moving in together," she scolds.

  "Right. Break your lease. I’ll pay the fees."