by E. C. Hibbs
As I was securing it with pins, Benjamin entered, flinging his jacket onto the bed. Then he grasped one of the posts, forehead rested against it; hunching as though he had been struck in the stomach.
I got to my feet and walked over, wrapping my arms around his chest from behind. His hand clutched mine tightly; then he twisted around to hug me. Neither of us spoke, just stood there and simply held each other. I glanced up at him, offering a small smile, which he returned.
“I suppose we are definitely equal now, aren’t we?” Benjamin muttered; voice tight with barely-contained sadness. “Now we each have a parent who was lost to a dark one, as you would call them.”
I closed my eyes dejectedly. “Do not think of that now.”
“I cannot help it. Father knew what was happening.” He paused. “Did you?”
“Of course not,” I insisted.
“You saw the Revenant, didn’t you? Outside the window.”
My words stopped themselves before they could be spoken, very aware of the danger. But I paused, struck by the brokenness in Benjamin’s eyes. He looked nothing like the egotistical youth I had first encountered. He now seemed akin to a frightened little boy, floundering in a vast sea, searching desperately for some kind of answer to this pain.
To see him like that suddenly tore something within me; then hardened it until it was stronger than steel. A hatred more intense than anything I had felt before flashed through my veins like electricity. My strange level of affection for James now grew cold as winter, to see how much hurt he had brought down upon my husband.
I mentally heard his smooth voice speaking our old promise, as though he were close enough to whisper in my ear.
“You will never betray me. No matter what may come, or who may ask, not a word of me shall ever cross your lips.”
“Yes,” I said firmly. “Yes, I did see him.”
Benjamin swallowed. “You called him James?”
“I don’t know his true name. He has kept that from me deliberately,” I explained. “I know why he has done this evil deed. He realised your father was a harmless ages ago; I was there with him when he told me that. Yet he made no move before now. Nem... he did not intend to strike Henry or you, with this awful act. It was meant for me.”
“Why?”
“That night when your father intercepted me, I spoke of James,” I realised. “He told me that he would always be watching me. He must have overheard; thought I’d been disloyal to my promise. I remember... I saw him fleetingly that night too, after Henry brought me home. He was looking at me through the window. I thought I imagined it, but no.”
“You do realise you are being disloyal right now?” Benjamin pointed out curtly.
I ground my teeth. “I don’t care. I would betray him to the entire world after this,” I snarled. “I will tell you everything, right now, my dear. He is Inspector James Hayes: a night policeman of Toxteth. He has strawberry blonde curly hair and angular features, and the black eyes of all the dark ones.”
Benjamin’s face slackened with comprehension. “I think I know him!” he gasped. “Does he often patrol near your old house?”
“Even more so after I arrived,” I affirmed. “He first came with the intent to drink from me, but after seeing I was a juvenile, he began tutoring me in his ways.”
“But why you? What made him choose you?”
“He has never struck me as the type to create a juvenile of his own.”
“It still makes no sense.” Benjamin gave me a sideways glance. “Éva... am I correct in thinking that demons are beyond love?”
My heart skipped a beat. I’d gladly now bring to light everything I knew of James; however, I simply could not find the courage to admit this truth. It was my own sin, and would destroy Benjamin beyond measure at any point, but today it would be a strike from which he’d never recover.
“He does not love me,” I said, surprised at my own conviction. “I don’t know what he feels for me, but it is not love.”
“And what of you?”
“I never wanted anything to do with him. But he is... persuasive.” I sighed. “Benjamin, you have my heart. Only you, forever. Not once have I sought James out, or found pride in what we have done. But he threatened to expose me unless I complied.”
“Expose you?” Benjamin’s brows slanted. “You mean for the killings?”
“Yes.” I hesitated, noticing the faraway look on his face. His eyes darted here and there, as though struggling to piece something together. “What’s the matter?”
“Éva,” he said slowly, “I need you to tell me exactly what he told you.”
I swallowed. “He made me promise to never speak of him, no matter what. And that my class as part of the Calvin family would help to cover our tracks even better. Why?”
Benjamin stared, his hands becoming tighter around me. Then he sank down on the bed.
“Good God. I think I know what he is doing.”
“What?” I gasped.
“Yes... it all makes sense,” he whispered. “The fact that he’s a police officer makes it perfect! Oh, my dear... he does not mean to help you a whit! He intends to frame you!”
I frowned, bringing a hand to my chest. “What are you saying?”
“He has been here for decades; claimed the entire city as his territory. That is what Father said.” Benjamin nodded to himself. “Yes. His activities cannot go unnoticed, no matter how well he covers his tracks. Except when he covers them with the name of another. And who better than a rich girl who everybody loves? Who better to shift the blame and take the fall? Why do you think he never told you that he could turn you back into a human when you come of age, and save you? Because upon that instant, when you will require more blood than ever before, he can lift the curtain on you at the most opportune moment.”
My mouth fell open as the truth of his words sunk in.
“Nem...” I whispered. “He wouldn’t...”
“Why do you doubt this?” asked Benjamin, but not nastily.
“I trusted him!”
“Exactly.”
The corset instantly felt as though it was crushing my ribs. My knees buckled and I dropped to the floor. Benjamin grasped my shoulders in alarm, but my eyes became unfocused as my mind ran riot. Like a parade of images, I recalled in seconds all the times I had spent with James.
To my horror, I could not doubt Benjamin’s statement. Hadn’t James distinctively mentioned that there had been others before me? Why else would he bother going to such lengths for me if not to serve some higher purpose that he’d known from the beginning?
My fingers tightened around my skirt as I remembered the feeling of his lips. I could barely say he’d ever been gentle with me, but I had been foolish enough to dare to believe that, on some strange level, he returned my affections. I had cared for him and taken earnest pity upon him, and this was how he had always intended to repay me.
And what of my revelation to him, all those months ago, when I had disclosed my suspicion about baby Norman’s paternity? He’d claimed to release me then, but had that all been an empty lie too? After all, hadn’t he followed me, watching me constantly, to ensure I still held up my promise?
You were never free, I thought to myself. You knew that from the start. He would never let you go.
“Éva?” I heard Benjamin saying from somewhere above me. “Éva, are you alright?”
I nodded woodenly. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?” he asked.
“Igen,” I said, letting him pick me up and seat me beside him on the mattress. “I can’t believe this.”
Benjamin pulled me close. “I’ll be willing to bet he was behind Norman’s passing as well,” he muttered. “How better than to eventually point the finger at you than to take one of your own family? The filthy bastard!”
At mention of Grandfather, I screwed my eyes closed and struggled not to weep.
“Do you know what he said to me once? That I was free to leave any situation a
s soon as I found the way out. I thought I had a way out of all this evil with you and with our son, my dear! But now... I see what James intends! He shall cut off my only exit by throwing me back into what I tried to leave behind!”
“Hush now, darling!” cried Benjamin. “I will not let you come to harm, I promise. We will find a way to bring him to justice. He shall not get away with this. I swear that on my soul.”
“Nem!” I snatched his face in fear. “You are a mere human! James will kill you!”
“We must get you away from him,” said Benjamin resolutely. “He has brought you too much pain. And I will not have you believe that he is now your only hope of survival for the final transformation.”
I paused. “What do you mean? I would never go back to him! Never! Not now!”
“I know. But we must find another full vampire who can help you. I am powerless in this matter.”
“Did your father know of any?”
Benjamin shook his head. “No. I think he was the only harmless in Liverpool. For years, it had just been him and the Revenant.”
“Then what would you do?” I asked, barely above a whisper. “There is only one way I can hope to survive now.”
Our eyes met; the sure understanding passing between them. Benjamin’s hand moved up to wrap around my bun, and I felt a single tear fall off my face as I reached to the locket. He pulled me against his chest, burying his face in my neck. I felt him kiss me there, softened by the material of my collar. Suddenly overwhelmed by the stifling fabric, I loosened the topmost buttons to let myself breathe better.
“I must leave,” I murmured. “I must return to Austria-Hungary. I cannot stay here.”
Benjamin lifted his lips for just long enough to reply.
“I know.”
CHAPTER XXIX
The next two weeks moved slowly beneath a continuous blanket of heavy cloud. It seemed to me that a huge shroud had been pulled across the city, turning everything into shades of grey.
I spent time in the library, slowly working my way through any books which caught my attention; and playing with baby Norman in the bright parlour. It was astounding to see how much he had grown in just over five months.
But now there was a little age behind him, I could truly notice traces of familiarity in his features. It seemed that he’d inherited a lot from me: his irises were icy blue, cheekbones high, brow and jaw smooth and effeminate. I began to wonder whether, as he matured, he would appear as a blonde version of my Apa: as stunning as a male could be.
I tickled under his chin, pulled him close to me; then grabbed his little foot and blew against it playfully. He giggled, eyes brighter than ever, blissfully and completely oblivious to all the turmoil happening around him.
“They all would have loved you,” I whispered in Hungarian. “Your grandfather; your great-grandfather... I know your Auntie Zíta would never have left you be. My dear boy, there are so many who you never met. But I know they are watching out for you from the sky, sweetheart. You’ll forever have guardian angels on your shoulders. And you’ll always have me and your Papa.”
I paused for a moment with a small sigh. “Your real Papa, I mean. Because you are Norman Jones. There will only ever be the three of us.”
Then I reached behind me, feeling around until my hand closed around the battered form of my ragdoll. I had spent the last week working on giving her some new hair and a better-stitched face, and now I’d brought it down from the bed chamber, my mind made up. I presented her to my son, and he cooed, instantly reaching out for the long strands of yellow wool.
“This is Mirriam,” I said, waving her about to make her seem alive. “Isn’t she pretty? Well, she’s seen me through some hard times. And now she’s going to do the same for you.”
I let him take the doll from me. He fed one of her hands into his mouth, and I giggled to myself.
At that moment, I heard the front door shutting, and looked up as Benjamin wandered through to the room. He was somewhat windswept, and wore a despondent expression. I hoisted baby Norman onto my hip and walked over as he sank into his usual chair. It was Christine and George’s day off, but there had been no choice of date for Benjamin about settling some of his father’s affairs. He had been absent practically all morning, leaving me alone with the maids and footmen.
He stroked my hand gently and gave his son a kiss on the head. “Has our little man been behaving for you?”
“Of course,” I smiled, but it wasn’t as broadly as perhaps I would have liked. “How did your meeting go?”
Benjamin instantly withdrew a cigarette from the case inside his jacket and lit it. “How I thought it would,” he replied. “The coal mines have passed to me. I shall have to visit them so I can see the workers.”
I frowned. “Have you never met them before?”
“Yes, but it was a long time ago. I was little more than a lad.” He let out a lungful of smoke. “But Father’s estate states that I am in charge now, and I must go back to Wales to oversee them for a couple of days.”
I gave a tight grin and sat next to him, reaching over to squeeze his knee in comfort. He gazed at me, and cupped my cheek.
“I want you to come with me,” he said.
“Really?”
“Of course.”
I wet my lips with my tongue. “Is this because you don’t want to leave me alone at night?”
“Partially,” Benjamin admitted. “I would not sleep a wink thinking that the Revenant might get in here and torment you in some way.”
“There would be no need to worry,” I assured resolutely. “I would not let him near me.”
My mind suddenly flashed with a moment from history, of my four year-old self, saying something similar mere days before the Final Purge. I could see the faces of my cousin and mother clearly, sitting by the hearth while I played with my stuffed Mirriam. My eyes fleeted to baby Norman’s arm, where she was clutched.
“Well, even though that may be,” Benjamin said, a little lighter now, “I believe I once mentioned I’d show you Wales, did I not?”
I nodded with a chuckle. “Yes, you did.”
“Then I have a promise to uphold,” he nodded. “I want you to be able to see it at least once before we leave.”
A frown instantly flew down on my face. “Leave? What are you talking about?”
Benjamin gave me an earnest look. “I’ve been thinking about it for a few days now, and with every moment that passed, I became more certain. We shall put Weaver House up for sale.”
“What?” I gasped. “Why? Where would we go?”
“Buda-Pesth.”
My breath stopped short; I could not think what to say. So Benjamin took the opportunity to continue, leaning forward in his chair so he was closer to me.
“Éva, your only hope for salvation now lies in your homeland, we both know that. Perhaps we can find a vampire over there who can reverse the transformation.”
“But what of this place?” I cried, gesturing to the majestic parlour. “This house has been in your family for generations... it is your home!”
“Not anymore,” Benjamin said, with utmost conviction. “For as grand a house this is, and for as honoured I am to have lived within its walls, it is just that: a house. And I have no family left now, save for you. You are my life, you and our dear little boy. I know that for as long as I have the both of you, all the world can be home.”
“What about the mines?”
“A hive of tunnels inside a couple of mountains? I have things which are far more precious now. So I’ll sell them as well. It will all take a while, but it shall be worth it in the end. They will fetch a good price, and we can use that to purchase a new house in Buda-Pesth. We can be close to your cousin Erik that way.”
I swallowed. “Benjamin, think on what you are saying. It is imperative that I return, but what if there is no way back for me? What if I do become a demon? Time would abandon me while you grow old –”
“I don’t care,” he said
firmly, taking hold of my hand. “I just want to be with you. Where you go, I go too.”
He bent closer so our foreheads were resting together, baby Norman between us.
“Éva, you have changed me. Before I met you, I was a spoiled and conceited boy, basking in the glories of the Jones name. But the moment I laid eyes on you, I was smitten. You bore all the beauty of a princess, both in face and in soul. We could not have come from more different origins, you and me. You have made me see something that runs deeper than what I thought I knew: you showed me how it is possible to love, with so much power; I would lay down everything to keep it.
“I must be with you, my darling. No matter what comes, I will be with you.”
My eyes filled with tears as he spoke; my heart fluttered inside my chest. His touch burned through me and I curled nearer, overcome with gratitude and humility.
I realised, even though I had felt strongly towards him for a while, I had still lived in fear, terrified that the reciprocations would be lost if he ever uncovered my darkest secrets. He truly was a remarkable man, and I had abused that. But now the light was shed on my tainted being, and for the first time, I let myself believe there was some small part of me which was still good; still worthy of him.
I glimpsed my two rings, side by side on my finger. James had tried to manipulate me, claiming that Benjamin wasn’t right for me. But how wrong he’d been! Who else would do all this for me, sacrifice so much when the chance of personal loss was so high?
I had come from a humble home, and I would gladly return to it. And now it was all the sweeter, knowing my husband would willingly make that journey with me.
I gave a small nod, struggling to control my sobs. “So... when do we leave?”
Benjamin stroked my face. “We need not be here for the sale to go ahead. I will speak to the estate agents before we go to Wales; then upon our return, we shall begin getting ready.” He paused. “There is a ship bound for Buda-Pesth later this month. I’ll arrange our passage.”
