"Seattle is a big city. No wonder you moved here. Did Monty do pretty well in your apartment?"
"Yeah, he has always been more of an inside dog, even though he loves to be out. I just never really had a yard for him so he is used to the house. I think he likes the warmth in the winter and air conditioning in the summer. He is pretty spoiled."
Andrew was still behind me and I couldn't see his face, but I could hear the wheels turning in his head with more questions. "Did you do the same kind of work in Seattle?"
"Yeah, I did. I have a friend who is a doctor and I did his transcription for a while, plus some of his partners' as well. Kept me pretty busy when Liv was a baby."
"And now? Who do you do it for?"
"I got certified a couple of months back, so now I work with a small company that has lots of different clients. I just do whatever is available at the time when I am able to work for a couple hours. They are really good to work with and since there are so many employees available, I don't have to worry too much about deadlines." We were passing by an elementary school and Olivia saw all the kids playing in the schoolyard. I picked her up and walked a little faster before she had the desire to go in there. "Oh, sweetie, the park is going to be so much fun today. You will have the sandbox all to yourself!"
She giggled and looked back at Andrew, "Adoo, san." She added a little more gibberish before ending her words as a question.
"Um…" Andrew wasn't sure what to say and he hesitated a little too long for her liking. She frowned and repeated the same sounds she had just made and he realized that he needed to give her an answer.
I looked over my shoulder and grinned, enjoying the sight of him squirming and pleading me for some help. He noticed and narrowed his eyes at me.
"Yes, Olivia, I do think your mommy is very nice. But I also think she is pretty."
I don't know what I tripped over, but my feet stumbled a bit after hearing what he said. He chuckled and I looked back over my shoulder and narrowed my eyes right back at him while Olivia asked him another gibberish question, obviously milking the attention he was giving her. He just shrugged.
"Oh, I would love to take you out to dinner, Olivia, but only if your mommy comes with us."
I stopped walking then and Monty ran into the back of my legs. I turned quickly and glared at him, but couldn't keep the amusement off of my face. He was good.
"Oh sorry, Jocelyn. She is just too sweet, how can I say no to her asking me to take her out?" His lips twitched when I didn't say anything and Olivia was still talking, but her focus had shifted to Monty.
Our eyes were locked for an endless moment before he took a step closer and the air between us sizzled. "If it's okay with you, I would really like to take the both of you out to dinner tonight. We all have to eat, right? Plus, I wanted to pay you back for feeding me last night, but I'm not a good cook so I figured going to a restaurant would be better."
"But… I fed you to pay you back for helping me."
He took yet another step closer, close enough for me to feel the heat radiating off of him. "Please?"
The sun must have only been on dim until that point because it suddenly was very hot and I felt a bead of sweat make a path between my shoulder blades. I wanted to refuse. I wanted to hold off on getting too close to anyone just yet.
But I couldn't.
His ocean blue eyes searched mine and were prepared for any excuse I would have given. I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "Okay. We'll let you take us to dinner." Of course, I said that with the intention of paying for mine and Olivia's meals, but I didn't need to tell him that.
His eyes flickered with… something, but it disappeared so fast, I thought I had imagined it. "Great!" He started walking again and made his way in front of me with Monty at his side.
Great! No big deal. Just dinner with a neighbor, or friend, I thought. Then I looked ahead of me and my eyes drifted down to his butt. Crap.
Andrew
I had so much energy after Jocelyn agreed to go to dinner with me that Monty became my new best friend. He ran around catching the Frisbee for an hour straight and only stopped because Olivia pulled his treats out of Jocelyn's purse and started handing them over to him. He followed her closely for a while after that while Jocelyn passed Olivia different snacks, just waiting for her to drop pieces for him. It was pretty amusing and we broke out in laughter every time Olivia offered him a piece and snatched it away just before he could grab it from her. The look on his face was priceless.
"She is such a tease," I said with a chuckle.
"Yeah she is, she always keeps me laughing and I never know what she is going to do next," she replied with an obvious pride for her little girl.
For the next 2 hours, Olivia played in the sand and on the slides and Jocelyn pushed her on the swing a few times. We sat by the small pond in the middle of the park and fed the baby ducklings. Monty was surprisingly calm after Jocelyn scolded him for getting to close. I could tell he was itching to chase the ducks, but he sat behind us very still with his ears perked high, just watching.
"Hmmm, I guess you were right about you being the alpha. He hasn't moved."
"Yeah, he is a good boy. I've spent a lot of time training him," she said and patted him on the head. He glanced over at her for just a moment in acknowledgement before returning his stare to the ducks.
When Olivia started getting a little cranky, Jocelyn sighed, "Guess we are done, it's about time for her nap. We better head back before she gets too upset."
I helped her gather her things and was putting Monty's leash on when Olivia tugged at my pant leg.
"Up."
I looked down at her for a few stunned seconds, not quite sure what to do. I think she wanted me to pick her up and I looked to Jocelyn for an answer.
"Up," she said again a little more determined and stretched her arms up to me.
"If you don't mind, I think she wants you to carry her." Jocelyn's quiet voice made me a little worried. She looked confused and didn't say anything else after that, just took Monty's leash from my hands and turned back to her things.
I lifted Olivia up into my arms, "Hey, pretty girl. I'll carry you, no problem. You want to ride on my shoulders?"
She just looked at me with a smile, not exactly sure what I was asking her. I twisted her around and lifted her above my head. She grabbed a couple handfuls of my hair, "Careful," she exclaimed in a shaky voice, but it sounded more like 'cawfoo'.
"It's okay, Liv." I sat her on the back of my neck and wrapped her little hands around my forehead, then held onto her legs when she was steady.
She giggled and shouted, "Mommy, Mommy, Adoo!"
I turned to Jocelyn and saw the look on her face. She looked pale and terrified, like she wanted to rip Olivia off my shoulders and make a run for it. "I won't let her fall, I promise," I reassured her, but she didn't seem to be focusing on that. She was staring at me.
She shut her eyes tightly for just a second and bent to pick up her bag, "I'm not worried about that."
Olivia was still talking gibberish and laughing as I bounced her up and down a little bit. I couldn't take my eyes away from Jocelyn and she locked hers with mine. They reminded me of warm chocolate and I noticed that one of them had a dark spot cutting through half of her iris. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," she breathed. "I'm good. Let's get going."
I walked in front of her and bounced Olivia up and down and spun around. She loved it and was laughing so hard she could stay upright. When I started getting a little tired, we walked slowly like that for a while until I felt her chin on the top of my head.
"She is about to pass out," Jocelyn said from right behind me.
I reached up for her and turned her in my arms. She snuggled into my shoulder and closed her eyes and my breath caught in my chest. Is this what it is like? To have such a tiny person trust you and rely on you so much?
"Isn't that the best?" Jocelyn whispered beside me and put a hand on her little girl's back.
She must have noticed the look on my face and I smiled down at her. She had to tilt onto her toes to reach, but she leaned in and kissed Liv's cheek and I was surrounded by the smell of lavender.
"Yeah… yeah it is."
We walked the rest of the way in silence with Monty dragging his feet and Jocelyn staying close to my side. I wanted to wrap my arm around her shoulders and pull her closer, but I kept my arms where they were and held her little girl tightly.
When we got to our houses, she headed straight for her door and unlocked it. I followed her up the stairs and into Olivia's room and she gestured to the crib. I wasn't quite sure how to lay her in it without waking her up and I looked to Jocelyn. She stifled a giggle and reached for her daughter. We both laid her down and I stepped back into the doorway when Jocelyn pulled a blanket over her and flipped on the monitor. She stood there looking down at her little girl with so much love and devotion it tugged at something in my chest. I had never seen a more dedicated mother aside from my own.
I turned away and made my way down the stairs. Monty was pushing his water bowl around trying to get the last few drops out. I picked it up and was filling it at the sink when Jocelyn entered the kitchen with her arms folded in front of her, studying me closely.
"What do you want from me, Andrew?" she asked sternly.
I took a step back, unsure how to respond to that and puzzled at the anger on her face. "What do you mean?"
"You know exactly what I mean," she narrowed her eyes. "Helping me with my stuff, the park, asking to take us to dinner. What are you hoping for?"
I gaped at her, registering the words she was speaking and trying to go back and figure out what I had done to make her so upset. I set the water bowl down in front of Monty who started gulping it down. Then it hit me. Madison was right. I have probably scared her and she is trying to protect her little girl from getting hurt. She doesn't know me that well, but that is what I was trying to do, get her to know me and get to know her and Olivia.
"Jocelyn, I don't know what to say. I just want to get to know you better." I took a few steps toward her and she put her hand up to stop me.
"Please, Andrew. I don't want Olivia to get hurt. She is everything to me and I can already see that she is getting attached to you and it has only been a day." She exhaled loudly and ran a hand through her long, thick hair and I craved for that to be my hand feeling the silky strands between my fingers. "I'm not trying to be rude, but I have been through a lot and I will never choose anything before her. She is my life and if you can't accept that right now, then I don't think we should pursue anything here."
I stepped quickly, ignoring the hand she had put up again and grasped her shoulders gently. Every word she said only made me want her more. "Jocelyn, I would never expect you to choose anything before Olivia. I accepted that from the first moment I laid eyes on you. You are an incredible mother and I can see that you have already done so much to make a good life for that girl. I'm not hoping for anything but a friendship." I tilted her chin with my finger to keep her eyes on mine so she could see the sincerity of my words, "At least for now."
Her breath hitched and her eyes darkened, the one with the dark spot going almost black. I know I affected her, but I couldn't push her to do something she would regret.
"I understand that it may take a long time," I muttered. "But I'm only trying to be your friend. I can see that you need one, hell, I need one."
It took all the strength I had not to trace her plump bottom lip with my thumb. My mouth was dry and my heart was racing. This was the moment that would change everything, the moment that would either open the door for something that could be incredible or shut it forever. So I didn't move.
She kept her gaze locked with mine and her lips parted slightly to accommodate the breaths that had suddenly quickened. "Okay," she whispered. "We can be friends. I just want you to know that a child's heart is involved and I swear to God I will protect her in every way."
I exhaled the breath I had been holding and felt a heady warmth spread through me. "I wouldn't want it any other way."
***
"Hey man, how was your break?" Chris greeted me when I walked into the office with a smile and wave.
"Not bad."
"Not bad? Did you do anything fun?"
I thought of the last couple days and my lips curled up into a smile. Had the best time of my life.
"Oooh, looks like maybe you did. You are in a good mood. What's her name?" Chris said as he leaned his elbows on the desk and wiggled his eyebrows.
I scoffed, "Why do you think a girl had anything to do with me being in a good mood?" I walked over to the table full of coffee, donuts, and fruit and started to load up a plate, ignoring his menacing glare. He hated when I didn't fill him in on everything I did. He loved his life with Jenny, but he liked hearing about all of our single lives. Living vicariously through all the rest of us.
Chris stood and made his way over, poured himself a cup of coffee, and eyed me carefully. I kept my eyes on the food and tried not to smile.
"Maybe because I know you better than you think and I had the exact same look plastered all over my face after I met Jenny. Amazing what a woman can do, huh?"
I chuckled and took a moment to decide how much I actually wanted to tell him. He had been my friend as well as my boss for a long time and was a good guy. Jenny and him had always taken good care of me and Madison. I took a deep breath and grinned, "Jocelyn."
His eyebrows shot up his forehead and his jaw dropped, "Wow."
"Yeah."
"How did you meet?" he asked and took a sip of his coffee.
"She's my neighbor."
"No shit?"
"Yeah."
He set his mug down and picked up a donut, studying it carefully before taking a mouthful. "What does she look like?"
I closed my eyes for a moment and saw her standing in her doorway, in the park, and at the restaurant. "Dark brown long hair, chocolate eyes, a smile that kills, and the most beautiful body. She's perfect."
Chris looked at me impassively, readying himself to be a devil's advocate. "So, why is she single?"
The donut in my hand stopped inches from my open mouth. I hadn't asked Jocelyn about anything regarding her dating life. She obviously wasn't dating and from what I could tell, she hadn't dated at all since she had Olivia, or maybe even since before that.
"Don't really know and I don't really care as long as she is." I paused and set my plate down, turning to face him with folded arms. He was going for another sip of coffee when I spoke, "She has a kid."
He choked on the coffee and started coughing violently. "What?!" he exclaimed while I slapped his back.
"Yeah," I chuckled as I picked up my plate and made my way over to the chair sitting in front of his desk.
When he could finally breathe, his gaze shot up to me. "She has a kid? How old?"
"Fifteen months and she is the cutest damn thing I have ever seen."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
"And what about the father?"
I chewed on the bite of jelly filled donut slowly. I hadn't asked about Olivia's father and Jocelyn never volunteered that information. Technically, at this point, it was still none of my business. I shrugged my shoulders, "Don't know."
He shook his head and went back to the plush leather chair behind his desk. "Sounds like you might be head over heels, going after a woman with a child and clearly a past."
"Why do you say that?" I feigned insult and waited for him to shuffle through the schedule on the desk. I needed to work on not smiling so much, then no one would think something was up. Yeah right, like that's possible.
"Because, a single mother only deserves a man who will fall head over heels for her and you, my friend, always give what is deserved." He sat back in his chair and swiveled side to side, giving me a triumphant smile.
I took another bite of my donut and kept my eyes on the desktop. "So, what do you think I should do? She is just… man, s
he is amazing and her little girl… I took them out to pizza last night and I have never had such a good time, ever. She wants to protect her daughter and I refuse to hurt her or that little girl. We agreed that we would be friends for now and that's it."
His brow furrowed and he sighed loudly. "Then there's only one thing you can do, my friend."
I waited for him to tell me something profound, something that would bring me some sort of epiphany, but he started writing on his notepad and reading through a few contracts, clearly trying to make me squirm.
"Which is..." I prompted.
His eyes jerked up to mine for a split second and then dropped back down to his notepad. "Which is be her friend. Be that little girl's friend. And you better be the best god damn friend she has ever had or could ever have."
"Is that all?"
He tossed his pen down on the desk and looked at me as if he were speaking to a child. "And don't screw it up."
"Wow, well that is totally new information that helps me out tremendously, thank you," I replied sarcastically.
"Anytime," he muttered and waved me to the door. "Jenny will be calling soon. I'll ask her what she thinks, but for now, I think my manhood has been emasculated with this conversation so I'm bringing it to a close."
I laughed as I walked out of the room, "Thanks, Chris."
It was going to be a long night. Not because the club I am supposed to go to tonight was going to be packed and not because I could almost guarantee that there would be a few fights to break up. Nope. It was going to be a long night because every second would be spent thinking of Jocelyn and how long it would take to break down her walls and allow me into her life. And because I had no idea how to even be her friend.
Chapter 5
Jocelyn
After our conversation the afternoon of the park, it was easier to be around Andrew. It had terrified me how trusting Olivia had been with him and it took everything I had in me not to rip her away from him and run for the hills. He had the power to destroy us in every way and I made sure that my guard was on the ready.
We went out for pizza that night, but only after arguing for 10 minutes about who would be driving. He finally let me drive, but only because he couldn't figure out how to remove the car seat from the back of my car and get it into his. I was laughing so hard that tears streamed down my face.
Our Time Page 5
