Deepest Desire

by Weston Parker

  The woman I'd fallen in love with at the coffee shop for the last year was the one that was going to bring it all down on top of us.

  "It's you or me, Nate. Someone has to kill the whore."

  I nodded. "You're right. It's me. I'll take care of it."

  "Good. You marry her, and I'll poison her with Zandra."

  "No. She knows it's toxic. I told her. I didn't know there was a connection when I let her in on the little secret." I opened the sliding glass door. "Be gone when I get back. I'm not in the mood for company."

  "That hurts."

  "Yep. Suck it up." I walked out into the afternoon sun and closed the door behind me. Life wasn't going to cut me any slack anytime soon.

  Jenna or Ashley. That was my choice, and where it seemed easy, it wasn't. I was attached to Ashley, tied to her side, and all of her money from our latest hit would remain untouchable until she granted me my half. She'd have to trust me to do that.

  The money from our last kill was running out fast. I needed her more than I needed Jenna, but I wanted Jenna a million times more.

  "So it's not really Ash or Jenna." I pressed my forearms to the balcony in front of me. "It's Jenna or poverty."

  I closed my eyes as my heart broke in my chest. Life would fuck me once again. It was simply the way of things. I just hated it like hell for my sweet girl. She didn't deserve what was coming her way.

  ***

  "What? No. Dude. No. I told you this shit was going to happen." Mikey chucked the basketball at me with aggression. "I like this girl."

  "Yeah, I do too, dimwit. Fuck." I chucked it back and walked toward him aggressively. "What would you do? Hm?"

  "I don't know. I don't get into these crazy, fucked up situations like you do. Shit." He threw the ball at me and turned and ran toward the fence.

  "Hey, bitch. Why don't you pick on someone your own size?" A behemoth of a guy stepped onto the court.

  I chuckled and chucked the ball at Mikey before giving my attention to the guy. "I'm not nearly as fucking fat as you are, man. That's an insult and I'm gonna take a pound of flesh from your face for that shit. You'll thank me later."

  "Oh shit. Nathaniel. No, man. I was just being dramatic. Hey, Mr. Big Dude, thanks for the help, but he's my best friend." Mikey ran toward us as I turned to face him and lifted my hand.

  The giant answered for me. "Your best friend is a fucking bully. He needs to be taught a lesson. Stay back, man."

  "Bully?" I glanced over at the guy. "I'm having to decide if I'm going to kill my childhood friend or the girl that leaves my dick hard and my heart fluttering all day long. Excuse the fuck out of me for being a little loud about it."

  I moved toward him with speed I'm not quite sure he was expecting. I'd laid three punches on him before he socked me once in the side pretty good. All the air in my lungs rushed out, and I moved back and gulped for air.

  Mikey ran toward the guy, but I moved in his way and pushed him back, which of course resulted in him landing on his fat ass.

  "See? Fucking bully. I hate bitches like you." The guy growled and moved toward me.

  "Let me guess. You didn't get your first growth spurt until senior year and everyone beat your ass until then?" I moved out of his way as he reached for me and knelt down, punching him twice in the nuts before he could drop to the ground and roll on his side. I moved in front of him and kicked him once in the chest and again in the face. "Did I get it right, bitch? Join the goddamn club. Mind your own fucking business."

  "Nate, come on, man. Don't do that." Mikey pulled at my arm and forced me to move back. "Stop that shit. People are starting to gather."

  "Whatever." I jerked from his hold and grabbed my ball as I walked back toward my apartment. First Ashley and now Mikey. What else the fuck could go wrong?

  I almost made it to the apartment when Mikey jogged up and moved in front of me. He pressed his hand in the center of my chest and gasped for air.

  "Wait. Please. Please. Just let me-"

  I glanced down at his hand and back up to him, my expression menacing at best. "Get your hand off of me, Mikey. I needed a friend today, and you were anything but that."

  "I'm your best friend. You want me to off one of the girls? I'll do it. Give me a fucking pillow and I'll just snuff them out." He pressed his hand into my chest harder and let his head drop. "Fucking running. We could just run them to death. I swear to God, I'm going to have a fucking heart attack."

  "You should jog more, you fat bastard." I pulled his hand from my chest and turned my back to him. "I've been with Ashley since we were kids, Mikey. I was there the day her momma died and I held her while she lost her shit. She's a cruel bitch, but how can anyone blame her for that shit? Life's been cruel."

  "But you're in love with Jenna Webb, aren't you?"

  I jerked around and let my eyes scan the street. "Don't ever say that again, Mikey. I'm serious."

  "Love wins out here, Nate. Turn Ash in and give her a different life."

  "One behind bars? You don't know what you're asking of me."

  "I'm asking you to choose what's best for everyone involved. She killed Darek. You didn't. You can't even be linked to this shit."

  "Of course I can. It was my Zandra she gave him. She could make it look like I was the fucking dealer. It's an easy pin." I rolled my shoulders and bounced on the balls of my feet. "I have to kill one of them. That's the only way out of this. Or kill myself."

  "No." His voice was deep, strong. "No. That's not happening. Fuck them both. Let them kill each other. Let's get the money and run."

  "No way." I pursed my lips and let my eyes move across the sky toward the sunset. "I gotta take a quick shower. I'm spending the night with Jenna."

  "That's not a good idea."

  I patted his chest as I moved past him. "Yeah, who the fuck said it was? I'm not usually the kinda guy who does what's safe. I need a night with her."

  "And then?" he called after me, his voice filled with hard emotions.

  "I don't know, buddy. We'll see what happens." I shrugged and walked into the darkness of the hallway to my apartment. "We'll just see what happens."

  Chapter 16

  Jenna

  "Ouch!" I jerked my hand back from the stove and lifted my fingers to my lips. "Damn, that hurt."

  One of the talents I was lacking sorely was cooking. I could pull together a few things, but I was beyond clumsy in the kitchen, which was weird, and not at all like me.

  I reached for the oven mitt and covered my hand before trying to hold on to the pot handle. I'd almost whipped the mashed potatoes to perfection when the doorbell rang. Nerves rose up deep inside of me and spread out like tendrils.

  "Coming," I called out, knowing that there was no way Nate could hear me. I stopped by the mirror near the front door and fixed my hair a little more. My V-neck fit me snugly, but my skirt flowed out, leaving my hips to be hidden a little. Or so I hoped. I opened the door and moved back as Nate smiled.

  "Hi. You look good enough to eat." He moved into the apartment and closed the door behind him before wrapping his arms around me and leaning down to consume my mouth.

  I tilted my head a little, opened up for his assault and let myself melt against him. His thick hard body molded against mine, fitting me almost too well. Strong, greedy hands ran over my hips and down my lower back to cup my ass softly as he kneaded my flesh.

  "You didn't really need to cook dinner, baby. I just wanted an excuse to come over and make you howl my name." He nipped at my lips before grabbing the oven mitt from me and walking toward the kitchen. "Something is burning."

  "Come in?" I reached out and put my hand on the wall next to me as the room spun. The passion between us was blistering hot. I only prayed he felt the same about it, but I doubted it. A man like him would likely never meet his match in the bedroom, but I wanted to at least be remembered as a girl who had given him a good run for his money.

  "You can't cook pasta on high, Jenna." He glanced over his shoulder
and smiled. "You got something cold to drink?"

  "Yeah. Wine and beer. Or I could make tea if you wanted."

  "Beer sounds delicious. Grab me one and then take a seat. I love to cook. I'll take care of this."

  Warmth traveled from the pit of my stomach out, racing down my arms and up my chest. My nipples ached as my bra rubbed over them. How he could turn me on so quickly was honestly disturbing, and yet there was little reason to fight it. I'd been dreaming about experiencing emotion like I was now for my whole life.

  "You can cook, hmm?" I got him a beer, popped the top and moved toward him.

  "Oh yeah. There isn't much I can't do." He took it and turned back to the stove as I moved up behind him and pressed myself to his back.

  "You give a good spanking for sure." I rose up on my toes and brushed my lips by the back of his neck. "But the real question is whether you take them as well as you give them."

  He laughed loudly, the sound causing my heart to flutter deep inside of my chest. I'd fallen in love with all the lies I'd made up about him over the last year. He was beyond dangerous in my mind, a murderer. A hitman like Erik. His nefarious ways had the law after him, and after one night in my bed, he would be gone... forever. It was tragic and yet sickly beautiful for some reason. Maybe I'd seen too many old love stories, but it felt fun to pretend either way.

  "You're cute, baby girl. There's no spanking a man like me, but you could wrap your pretty arms around me and rub my dick while I finish up this mess you were making."

  I snorted and wrapped my arms around him before pressing my cheek to his back. His muscles flexed and he groaned as I cupped his erection and slid my nails down it slowly.

  "You're so direct," I whispered and cupped his balls, "and vulgar."

  "You love it." He leaned forward, pulling me with him.

  "I do." I brushed my nose down his back and breathed in deeply. "Nathaniel."

  He stiffened in my arms. "What, baby?"

  "Have you ever made love to a woman?" I needed to know. Where I wanted a night of fucking, maybe he needed something differently.

  "No." His voice was almost too soft to hear.

  I released him and walked toward the counter to pour myself another glass of wine. "Never been in love."

  "No." He glanced over his shoulder. "You've got too much on. Take off that shirt and go put on a tank top. No bra. I wanna see your titties through the thin material. Tease me."

  I stood there for a minute, a little surprised by his request, though it shouldn't have shocked me. The man was one hundred percent alpha asshole, or was he? There seemed to be a soft gooey center. I was just scared to find it.

  "Now, Jenna. Don't make me ask again, princess." He didn't turn my way but somehow must have sensed me still standing there.

  "All right. I'll be right back." I walked down the hall as my heart beat inside my chest much faster than I thought possible. My hands were sweaty, my thighs trembling again by the time I got back to my bedroom and pulled my shirt over my head. I found a lace camisole and a pair of see-through white panties to change into. It took longer than I wanted it to because of my hands shaking so fucking bad.

  "Stop it." I moved in front of my full-length mirror and growled. My breasts were too big, as were my hips. "I can't do this."

  "Yeah, you can." He stood in the open door.

  I yelped. "Tell someone when you're coming down the hall. Shit. You scared me."

  "Nothing to be scared of while I'm here, angel. I'd never let anything happen to you." He licked at his fingers. "It's gonna be a long night, and I'm not using a condom with you."

  "Yes, you are." I put my hand on my hip and gave him a stern look.

  He turned his back to me and pulled his shirt over his head. "No, I'm not. Better make sure your pills are up to date."

  "Nate. We're not fucking if you don't have a rubber." I walked down the hall after him, my angst lost to the new situation at hand. "I don't know where you've had your dick. It's not happen-"

  He turned and snatched me up, grabbing my hips and lifting me as he pressed me to the wall in the hallway. I wrapped my legs around him as the picture beside us dropped to the ground and shattered.

  "My dick hasn't been anywhere unguarded by a condom." He gripped my hands and held me to the wall by the firm press of his thick body. Forcing my hands above my head, he ground into me and kissed the side of my throat. "Me threatening our night together had you forgetting all about how you looked, didn't it?"

  "Asshole." I wrapped my arms around his neck and moaned as he rocked against me over and over. The pressure against my clit had me twitching, whispering for him to fuck me right there in the hallway.

  "How close are you?" He ran his tongue up the side of my throat and pressed his teeth into the soft lobe of my ear.

  "So close," I mumbled and pressed my face against his neck.

  "Good. Let's take the edge off." He moved us back from the wall and toted me into the living room.

  I grumbled when he set me down. He dropped down on the couch. "Sit on my lap."

  "Take your jeans off."

  "You're not in charge here, Jenna. Sit on my lap or go back down the hall and get dressed." He lifted his hand toward me. "Sit on my lap, baby. Now."

  I huffed softly, rolled my eyes and turned around to drop down on his lap. His fingers dig into the soft flesh of my hips as he pulled me down, nestling his erection between my ass cheeks. The pressure felt naughty. Delicious.

  "Lean back." He pulled me back and pressed his mouth against my ear again as he rolled his fingers over my nipples one at a time. "Fuck yourself for me."

  "What?" I stiffened. "No. You're here. I don't want fingers."

  "Too bad. I want to experience what it would be like to watch you fuck yourself when you're alone, thinking of me."

  "You assume I think about you." I whimpered as he slid his hand down my stomach and cupped my pussy.

  "Do it for me, and there isn't anything you can't have from me tonight."

  A tremor ran down my spine. "What if I want something you're not willing to give me?"

  "Nothing is off limits if you do this for me." He moved my panties to the side. "Join me down here. Punish yourself and use my name when you gush, all right?"

  His soft lips and wet tongue bathed the side of my neck as he rolled his hips, grinding his cock against my ass.

  Fear washed over me, but I ignored it. I wanted everything from him that night, and if all he wanted was to watch me, or rather hear me fuck myself, whatever. I'd done it a zillion times.

  I ran my hand past his, scratching his fingers before sliding my middle finger down my folds and rimming myself. I moaned loudly as my body demanded penetration.

  "That's it, naughty girl. Work that tight little slit. Open it up for me. I got a lot of dick I'm going to force into that sweet hole." He brushed his fingers over my clit and I cried out again. "You drive in hard, now. I'll worry about your sweet spots."

  I nodded and pressed my fingers deep inside of me as I spread my legs farther. It felt so fucking good to have him pressed against my back, promising to give me anything I wanted as I worked my fingers faster and faster into my body.

  "So close."

  "Whisper my name like you do when I'm not here, Jenna. You do it, don't you?" He pinched my clit and I cried out, arching my back as I screamed his name. "Tell me what you ask me to do to you, baby girl. What dirty desires do you whisper to yourself? Speak out loud for me. I need to know so I can take care of you tonight."

  "Oh God. Nate, please don't-"

  "Say it, Jenna. Say what you say when I'm not here."

  Never in a million years had I imagined myself capable of being so open with someone. "Please."

  "Now." He growled against my neck and pushed my hand aside, taking my place with three thick fingers. His palm pressed to my clit, massaging it intently as I moaned like a whore in heat. "There we go. Tell me. I need to hear it."

  "I need you so bad, Nate." My voice shook.
"Touch me everywhere. Take me. Own me. Fuck me until I don't know anything but you."

  "Yeah, Jenna. Where am I fucking you, princess? In your sweet pussy? Your ass? Want me throat deep in your pretty mouth?"

  "All of it." I cried out again as electricity built up in my stomach. "Spread me open and violate me. Don't stop until you're done with me until you've had all you can handle."

  "What else, lover?" He sucked my ear into his mouth and ground against my ass.

  "Don't stop ever..."

  "Not even when you ask me to?" He moved his free hand down to tap on my clit while he pumped his fingers deeper into my body.

  Sweat collected at the base of my back, the top of my lip, below my breasts. I cried out as the orgasm hit. "No, not even when I ask you to."

  I sat up and bounced on his fingers, losing myself in the moment. "More. More, Nate. Please don't stop fucking me."

  "Why would you let a man violate you like that, Jenna?" He moved up behind me and pressed his teeth into the back of my shoulder.

  "No. Don't. Please." I rode the high of the orgasm and dropped back against him as it subsided. "Don't do that. It will ruin everything."

  He gripped my face tightly and forced me to look over at him. His lips were soft, his tongue thick and hard as he drove it into my mouth in quick, deep thrusts. "Tell me. It's not going to ruin everything. Why would you let a bastard like me fuck you until I was sated? What kind of woman does that?"

  Tears filled my eyes. "Don't."

  "Tell me. Now, baby." He kissed me again and cupped my sex, rubbing the pads of his fingers through the wetness that dripped from my body. "Tell me, Jenna. I need to hear it."

  I took a quick breath and closed my eyes. "A woman in love with a man."

  "With a stranger?" He pressed his fingers back inside of me.

  I nodded and bit my lip as a tear rolled down my cheek.

  "No crying, princess. Go clear the table and get on it. I'm not fucking you tonight. I'm not sure I could handle it, but I'll leave you with a few sweet memories." He patted my pussy once more as I started to fight him on his decision to leave before we fucked.