Eventually Rachel drifted off to sleep, the effect of her dad’s comfort and the painkillers.
“Remember, we’ve got to keep an eye on her when she’s asleep, the leaflet says so,” said Gill, waving the head injury advice sheet in the air.
“I’ll watch her. Why don’t you get some kip?” Rick told Ryan.
“I couldn’t sleep,” he replied, his gaze still fixed on the air. He looked down at Rachel snoozing away against her dad’s shoulder and wondered how she could.
Rick caught the look in his eye. “She’s on strong painkillers.”
“Oh yes, I forgot about those.”
When he returned to staring into space, Rick looked at Gill questioningly, who shrugged her shoulders and went to tend to the boys.
Rachel was woken by her mum and dad peering over her.
“What are you doing?” she grimaced, rubbing her eyes.
“Making sure you’re okay, you’ve had a serious head injury,” Gill told her.
“I’m fine, you can stop fretting.” She pushed herself upright and frowned. “Where’s Ryan?”
Gill and Rick glanced at each other uncertainly. “He’s gone out.”
“He’s what? But I need him here.”
“He said he wouldn’t be long, he needed some fresh air. I can go and look for him if you want?” offered Rick.
“Did he take the car?”
“No.”
She relaxed. “Then he’s just gone for a walk, he can’t stand being cooped up. He’ll be back soon.”
Almost in response to her words, the front door slammed shut and Ryan strode in, face ruddy from the exercise.
“How are you feeling?” he asked her gently.
“Not good.”
They held each other’s gazes and when Rachel crumpled into tears he went to her and gently cradled her in his arms. Rick and Gill took the children into the porch to get on their coats and shoes, deciding they needed some privacy.
“I was worried when I woke up and you weren’t here,” she said.
“I’m sorry, I just had to get outside, I was going stir crazy.”
“I know, it’s okay. Ryan, we have to talk about the funeral.”
His face went white and he shook his head. “Not yet.”
“We can’t put it off. What do you think we should have?”
He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “I can’t think about it.”
“We have to. We have to say goodbye properly. Once we’ve done that, things might get a little easier.”
“You mean just get on with our lives?” he said scathingly.
“I can’t even think about that yet. What I mean is we might start to heal. Please Ryan help me, I can’t do this alone.”
He took her hand. “Alright, we’ll plan it together. But I have to find who did this to us.”
“You’re going to hurt them?”
“At least.”
“But you’ll be going back to the life we’ve been trying to avoid for so long.”
“This is something I have to do,” he said darkly.
Rachel knew this was his coping mechanism, concentrating on finding the person responsible. She knew he felt he hadn’t protected her like he should have and he was trying to compensate for that.
“Okay,” she nodded. “Just don’t kill them.”
“They killed Thomas.”
“And me and the kids need you here, not locked up in prison.” His worst nightmare was going back inside and she prayed the prospect stopped him from going too far.
“Alright,” he said grudgingly.
“Promise me Ryan.”
“I promise,” he muttered. When the doorbell rang he sighed and dragged himself to his feet. “I’ll get rid of them.”
Ryan opened the door to DCI Taylor, alone this time.
“What do you want?”
“I’ve come to speak to your wife about the accident.”
“Come through.”
Ryan slammed the door shut none too gently, annoyed by this intrusion and Taylor followed him through to the lounge.
“Hello Rachel, I’m sorry to disturb you at this time but I do need to take another statement.”
“She’s already given a statement,” said Ryan.
“I need to hear it from her own lips, I’ve taken over the case.”
“It’s fine,” said Rachel, just wanting to sleep. “We get a detective chief inspector for a car accident?”
“Yes, in view of what happened to the baby.” He sat down and pulled out a pad and pen. “So, do you have any memory of the accident?”
“It’s hazy. All I remember is sitting at the lights. I heard the screech of tyres, I looked to my right and there was a van coming at me.”
“Can you describe it?”
“Big and white, like a transit.”
“Did you see anyone inside?”
“No, it happened too fast. It hit, then nothing.”
“Can you tell me your day leading up to the accident?”
“I’m afraid not. All I can remember is leaving the house that morning, after that it’s a blank, a side effect of the head injury.”
“She went to the spa, I’ve already confirmed that with the staff,” interjected Ryan. “Nothing unusual happened then she went to her friend Beth’s house.”
“Would this be Beth Maguire?”
“Yes,” replied Rachel. “She’s been my best friend for years. I looked after her kids while she got some sleep and then left. I must have been on my way home when the accident happened.”
Taylor nodded as he jotted down some notes.
“Have you got any CCTV or witnesses?” said Ryan.
“We have witnesses but unfortunately they all say different things. We’ve got a partial plate from the CCTV and we’re cleaning up the footage to try and read the rest.”
“When you get a name, I want it,” said Ryan.
“I understand why but I can’t do that.”
“Yes you fucking will. I know you’re in Alex’s pocket.”
“Ryan,” chided Rachel.
“It’s alright Rachel, I’d want the same if I was in your husband’s shoes but I still can’t do it.”
“Name your price,” pressed Ryan. “However much you want. I’ll set you up for life if you bring me this bastard.”
Taylor might have been bent but he wasn’t prone to wilting like Alex’s other informants. He was a strong man and the more he was threatened the more he dug his heels in. “I repeat I can’t do that. Now please let it drop, it’s not helping.”
“Ryan, please stop,” sighed Rachel.
He gave her an incredulous look before turning on his heel, storming into the kitchen and kicking the door shut.
“Sorry about him,” said Rachel.
“It’s alright, he’s had a devastating loss. I’m going all out to find who did this Rachel.” He found her quite fascinating, there was much more to her than mere beauty, although he couldn’t put his finger on exactly what. No wonder Superintendent Benton had become obsessed.
“I’m sure you are and I appreciate it.”
He got to his feet. “I’ve got all I need for now. I’ll keep you informed. Please don’t get up, I’ll see myself out.”
After he’d gone Rachel slowly climbed off the couch and went into the kitchen to find Ryan. He was staring out of the window, arms folded across his chest. She went up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head on his shoulder.
“I’m going to kill them Rachel,” he said quietly.
“I know,” she replied, gazing out into the vast garden, the one Thomas would never get to play in because of some arsehole who couldn’t drive. No matter what she said, she knew she wouldn’t change his mind. “Just don’t get caught, please.”
“I won’t.” Ryan felt her round belly pressing against his side and he wanted to rage against the world. The pain inside him was like a black, malignant thing taking him over, making him want to lash out an
d hurt someone. He’d never felt anything like it in his life and, worst of all, he didn’t know how to rid himself of it.
Rachel couldn’t remember anything about the funeral. All she could recall was the tiny white coffin, the hole in the ground, her knees giving way and Ryan catching her. Now she was back at home, her mum on one side, her husband on the other, sitting on the couch in stunned silence. All the children were at Martina’s house, their grandmother looking after them, with Cathy’s help, who thought it best to stay away with her big swollen belly. Amber had stayed away too, although she had sent flowers.
“I’m just going to talk to Alex,” Ryan gently told his wife.
She looked at him and nodded, face ashen. “Please don’t be long.”
“I won’t, I promise.”
He kissed her then got to his feet, nodding at Alex, Declan, Mikey and Jez imperiously, who followed him outside into the garden. Gill watched them go, fearing what they were plotting and that this tragedy would pull her son-in-law back into his old life. Fear clutched at her as she regarded her stricken daughter, who appeared to be on the verge of falling apart. Thomas’s death had hit her even harder than Danny’s and so it should. Gill’s eyes narrowed at the memory of her first son-in-law, who to her had been nothing but a dirty criminal. But Thomas had been an innocent, his chance at life snatched from him. She started to cry again, clinging onto her daughter when she hugged her tightly.
“I’m going after the bastard who did this to us,” Ryan told the four men. “You can be in on it if you want but if not then stay out of my way.”
“Aren’t you best letting us handle it?” suggested Mikey. “You’ve got your new life, you can’t risk getting nicked.”
“That won’t happen.”
“It might if you end up killing someone.”
He took an aggressive step towards Mikey, just wanting an excuse to hurt someone. “Nothing’s stopping me. I’ve already discussed it with Rachel and she’s given me her blessing. I’ve got a list of all the little wankers who enjoy nicking cars and ramming them into things, top of that list is Ollie Jones.”
“You’re out of luck there,” Alex told him. “Taylor told me he was first on their list too but he was locked up in their holding cells when the accident happened.”
“If it’s not him then it’s one of his scummy friends. I’m still going to pay him a visit.”
“When?”
“Tonight.”
“Tonight,” exclaimed Mikey. “You’ve just buried your son, you can’t leave Rachel on her own while you go on a witch hunt.”
“She knows I’ve got to do this and she’s got her parents here.”
“That’s not the same thing, she needs her husband.”
“Mikey’s right,” interjected Jez reasonably. “I understand this is something you’ve got to do but you’ve got to put her above your need for revenge.”
“I’ll wait until she’s asleep then but I’m doing this tonight. You can either come or you can fuck off and leave me to it.”
Jez sighed, knowing his brother wouldn’t be swayed. “Alright, I’ll come.”
“Me too,” said Mikey. “Declan?”
“Yeah, course.”
Ryan nodded in acknowledgement then looked at Alex questioningly.
“I can’t tonight, I’ve got a meeting set up.”
Ryan appeared incredulous. “What?”
“How was I to know you were going to do this today? It’s already arranged and I can’t back out without losing a serious amount of cash.”
“I don’t fucking believe you,” spat Ryan. “Me and Jez went all out when your brother was murdered and we did it straight after his funeral, but you can’t do the same for my son.”
“Come on Ryan, we all know you did that for Rachel, not Danny,” countered Alex. “I bet you were glad when he died, you jumped into his widow’s bed quick enough.”
Mikey and Jez regarded Alex with their mouths hanging open while Declan took a few steps back in an attempt to distance himself.
Ryan moved so close to Alex they were stood nose to nose, both equal in height and strength. “If my parents-in-law weren’t here, I’d tear you apart for that.”
“Don’t use my brother’s death to try and blackmail me into helping you. I’ve got a meeting that can’t be changed. If I’d had some warning I could have rearranged it but it’s too late.”
“Well thanks a fucking bunch. I’ll remember this the next time you want a favour, like Rachel meeting with one of the most dangerous families in the country just to help you.”
“Ryan, take it easy. Rachel’s coming,” whispered Jez.
Ryan turned and saw his wife coming out of the house, eyes red from crying, so he took a step back from Alex.
“What’s going on?” she demanded. “It looked like you were arguing. Please don’t fall out, not today.”
“It’s okay, we’re just talking,” soothed Ryan, pulling her to him and running a hand up and down her back.
Alex forced a smile. “Ryan’s right, we were just having a friendly chat.”
Rachel didn’t appear to be convinced. “I really hope you’re telling me the truth.”
“Course we are,” said Ryan, throwing Alex a warning look. “Come on, let’s get you back inside, you’re shivering.”
As he led Rachel back to the house, Ryan looked over his shoulder at Alex, who stared back at him hard. Ryan knew something had changed between them, that the two families were starting to slip away from each other and he feared what it meant for his own family.
CHAPTER 16
“Ryan?” murmured Rachel, pushing herself upright.
Despair filled her when she saw the space in the bed beside her was empty. She got up and checked all the bathrooms, but he wasn’t in any of them. She checked on the children, who were all fast asleep, amazed they weren’t disturbed by the horrific snoring emanating from her parents’ room. She wandered through the house in her pyjamas searching for him but he was nowhere to be found. When she went through the kitchen door into the garage she saw his Audi was gone. Without him she suddenly felt lost and vulnerable. When he was with her she had the strength to get through this nightmare but without him she was weak.
Forcing away the tears and trying not to panic, she picked up the phone and called his mobile. When the answering machine kicked in she tried again immediately and he picked up on the fourth ring.
“Where are you?” she demanded.
“Just taking care of a bit of business.”
“You’re out searching for them already, aren’t you? Ryan I need you here.”
“I thought we agreed that I’d do this.”
“I didn’t know you meant tonight.” She crumpled into tears. “Please come home.”
There was a pause followed by an irritated sigh.
“Ryan, please.”
“I’ll finish up here then I’ll come straight back.”
“Okay,” she croaked, sensing she couldn’t push him any further.
Ryan sighed again and hung up before turning his attention back to the four terrified teenage boys in Burberry baseball caps and baggy pants. They were knelt before him in a row, lower lips wobbling as Ryan glared down at them and pulled on a pair of black leather gloves.
“Now, do you know who is responsible for crashing into my wife and killing my son?” he said politely.
“No,” cried the leader of the boys, tears and snot running down his face. “We didn’t nick any van. We like fast cars.”
“I don’t believe you.” He grabbed the boy roughly by the chin and yanked his face up to his, studying him closely. Witnesses said the driver had a bleeding nose, but the leader didn’t have a mark on him and neither did his friends.
He gestured for Jez, Declan and Mikey to the corner of the room for a chat.
“I don’t think it’s them,” Mikey said quietly.
“Me too,” said Jez.
“If they knew who did it they would have told us by now,”
said Declan. “They’re shit scared.”
“I think you’re right,” sighed Ryan. He thought it would be easier than this. He thought he’d have found the little bastard by now and planted him six feet under, but they’d roughed up every little scrote in the area with a fondness for nicking vehicles and turned up nothing. “Rachel wants me home.”
Jez was relieved. “Good, let’s get out of here.”
Ryan regarded the four teenagers with a dark smile, needing to vent some frustration or he thought he might lose his mind. “Just give me a few minutes. I want to make an example of this lot,” he said before his fist connected with the eldest boy’s face.
Back at home, Ryan checked himself over to make sure he didn’t have any blood on him before climbing out of the car. He’d given the four boys a good pasting, which had done nothing to ease the pain inside him.
Rachel was sat on the couch cradling a whisky when he walked in and he felt guilty when she broke into a relieved smile.
“I’m so glad you’re home,” she said, getting up to hug him.
He held her to him tightly, pressing his face into her hair.
“Did you find him?” she said.
“No. I’m sorry.”
“Did you hurt anyone?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“If I didn’t I thought I’d explode.”
“Please don’t drag us back down that road Ryan.”
“We agreed.”
“To hurt the person who did this to us, not everyone who might have done.”
“You mean, like you did when Danny died?”
“Why does everything keep coming back round to Danny?”
“You tell me.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You went on the warpath to find who killed Danny but you can’t do the same for Thomas.”
A Family Divided (Dividing Line #3) Page 18
