He felt more than heard when she tiptoed past his partially open door. Maybe because he’d been listening for her. It was something he’d started doing since she moved in. Although he tried not to, he couldn’t seem to stop.
Glancing at the nightstand clock, he noted that it was half past seven. On a work morning they had coffee and a quick breakfast before hurrying out the door. Past weekends had been taken up with him being on call, the asthma clinic and house hunting. He had nothing going on and if she didn’t either, they could do nothing together. And that could lead to something. Or not.
Any time now he was going to stop that kind of thinking.
Throwing the covers back, Nick got up and headed for the shower. Ten minutes later, dressed in jeans and a T-shirt, he headed downstairs. Ryleigh was sitting at the island with a cup of coffee and the Review-Journal in front of her, a pencil in her hand.
When he entered the room, she looked up and smiled. “Good morning.”
“Morning.” He poured himself a cup of coffee, then grabbed the laptop he’d left on the kitchen’s built-in desk and sat beside her.
After turning the computer on, he waited while it booted up. With nothing else to occupy him, his senses went into overdrive. The smell of her just-showered skin filled his head with the intoxicating, provocative scent of oranges and spice. Her shiny hair was pulled up into a simple and sassy ponytail that somehow managed to be elegant and sophisticated. That was a testament to her beauty and grace because she certainly wasn’t dressed to impress. No power suit today. Sweatpants and a “Sin City” T-shirt were casual and sexy as hell. If she needed someone to help her put sin back in the city, he was just the guy for the job.
Ryleigh glanced at his computer screen as he scrolled through the news headlines. “You always did prefer to get the news electronically.”
“And you opted for print.”
“That’s partly because I spend so much time looking at a computer screen.”
“What’s the other part?” he asked.
“I have to confess.” There was a gleam in her eyes. “I like the newspaper for the word jumble.”
“I remember.”
Nick glanced down at the page in front of her. There were four words with letters scrambled and a cartoon that was a clue. When you figured out what the words were and wrote it in, the circled letters formed the answer to the puzzle, usually a play on words. Solving this riddle was how she liked to start her day. Mental exercise.
His gaze strayed to the tantalizing territory of her neck, the column just beneath her delicate jaw. The soft creamy skin there gave him a whole lot of ideas about jump-starting the day and not one of them included using his brain. Although hands, mouth and tongue would definitely be involved.
Ryleigh had a puzzled expression on her face that had nothing to do with the word jumble. “Now that I think about it, you’re still getting the newspaper delivered. You didn’t start subscribing again because of me, did you?”
“I never canceled it.” He shrugged. “Just never got around to doing it.”
“So it was easier to pick up a newspaper out in your driveway every day than to pick up the phone and call to stop it?”
“Yeah.” Agreeing was less complicated than trying to come up with some way to explain. His feelings were a jumble and she was a riddle he didn’t think would ever be solved, even if he let himself try to rationalize her.
“It’s your money.” She shrugged. “If you want to kill a tree…”
That didn’t bother him as much as killing all connection to her. The thought slipped into his mind so automatically, he figured it was a really good idea to change the subject.
“So, what are you making for breakfast?”
Her head snapped up and one dark eyebrow lifted. “You forgot to add ‘wench.’ Did you really just go all macho and traditional-role-assignment on me, Doctor? Automatically assuming that because I’m the woman I’d be cooking?”
“I haven’t allocated roles.” He was having a lot of trouble holding back a grin. “You assumed the responsibility all on your own.”
“You think I did that?”
“If it wasn’t you, there’s been an unidentified woman in my kitchen who’s been waving around oatmeal and fruit in the battle against high cholesterol.”
“It’s a dirty job, but someone has to do it.” When she shrugged again, the word “sin” on the right breast of her T-shirt lifted just a fraction, along with his pulse.
“So, I say again, what are you making for breakfast?”
She slid off the high stool. “Just for that, you’re going to help.”
“Just so you know, you played right into my hands.” If only.
“How do you figure?”
“If my services are being appropriated to assist in food preparation, I’m making bacon, sausage and hash browns.”
“How do you know there’s anything fitting that description in this house?” she challenged.
“There’s a package of bacon stashed behind the yogurt and fat-free string cheese. Frozen hash browns are in the freezer with the box of healthy fudgesicles. Bad food has breached your perimeter, but you already know that since you assumed grocery-store duty.” He pointed at her. “You always said calories don’t count on the weekend.”
“I have to admit, Doctor, you’re smarter and more observant than I gave you credit for. Okay, you win. But in exchange, you’ve got to give me a healthy protein.”
“Like what?”
“Vegetable omelets. Made with egg whites.” She thought for a moment, then added, “And you’re helping me cut up the veggies.”
“Done.” He held out his hand to shake hers and seal the bargain.
“Okay.” She put her palm in his and a sizzle snapped and popped between them. Her eyes widened as she pulled back. “I’ll get the hash browns in the oven and everything else we’ll need out of the fridge.”
Nick stood on the other side of the island and watched as she arranged the oval potato patties on a cookie sheet and put them in the oven. Then she set the stove timer. He only watched because at that moment he didn’t dare get close to her. It took every ounce of self-control he possessed not to pull her into his arms. When he had the upper hand over the urge, he moved beside her. She’d assembled mushrooms, green onions, tomatoes, green and red peppers, spinach, two cutting trays and a knife for each of them on the island.
He shook his head at the assortment. “You’re kidding, right?”
“Why?”
“At this rate we won’t eat until next Tuesday.”
“Oh, please. There’s only two of us. We don’t need that much.” She grinned. “Man up, Doctor.”
The beautiful, casual smile went straight through him and tweaked the wanting that was always there. She had no clue how much he’d like to “man up,” and how much effort it took to remember that she wasn’t his anymore.
While she steamed the spinach behind him, Nick picked up one of the knives and started on the mushrooms, slicing them into thin pieces. Before he knew it, the whole container was done. “This better be enough.”
She glanced over her shoulder and laughed. “We need less than a quarter of that. I’ll cook them all and we can have them with dinner.”
“What next?”
“Why don’t you start the bacon?”
He nodded and they traded places, backs to each other while she chopped and he cooked. Their bodies didn’t touch, but he could almost feel her pressed against him. Perspiration beaded on his forehead and it had nothing to do with standing over a hot stove and everything to do with the hot woman behind him.
When the strips of bacon were well-done and crispy, he set them on a plate with a paper towel to blot them. He turned and saw that she had all the vegetables cut into small, neat piles on the board. She turned and looked up at him. They were inches apart and stared at each other, something hot and sensuous radiating between them.
“Do you want toast?” Her voice was husky and brea
thy at the same time, as sexy as anything he’d ever heard in his life.
God help him, he was going to be toast because he just couldn’t stop himself. He didn’t even realize he’d moved until she was in his arms and his lips were on hers. With their mouths locked together, he devoured her small sigh of pleasure and it rolled through him like a fireball. Heat licked everywhere inside him.
He traced her lips with his tongue and she opened to him. Sweeping inside her mouth, he took her and felt the trembling of her body. Cupping her cheek in his palm, he slid his fingers into her hair, aching to pull it out of the tail and feel it loose around her shoulders.
The timer going off seemed as loud as a gunshot in the room and Ryleigh jumped. She blinked up at him, her eyes glazed over. He knew the feeling and didn’t want it to go away.
When he started to lower his mouth to hers again, she put a hand on his chest and shook her head. “No, Nick. Really not a good idea.”
“You’re wrong about that. It’s one of the best I’ve come up with in a long time.”
She pulled out of his arms and backed up a step, then pushed wisps of hair off her forehead with a shaky hand. “We have rules—”
“Screw the rules.”
“We talked about this. We set them up for a reason.” Clouds slid into her eyes as the passion faded and doubt took its place. “As much as I’d like to keep this up, I don’t want to lose you as a friend. If we go down this path, I’m afraid that’s what would happen.”
“It won’t. I promise.”
Her smile was bittersweet. “I know you mean that. You’re the most honorable man I’ve ever met and you’d never deliberately break your word. But if we don’t stick to the basics we established, you might not be able to keep that promise. And I’m not willing to take the chance.”
Without another word, she left him alone in the kitchen. The insistent timer kept beeping and he turned it off. If only he could do the same to himself. He drew in a deep breath and struggled to pull himself together. It was a long time before he could admit that she was right. He didn’t want to lose her friendship. His world had more sunshine with her in it.
He’d almost lost control when they were married; he’d been sorely tempted to let his feelings for her become the most important thing in his life. After she’d left, he knew how right he’d been to hold back. He wanted her; there was no denying that. She was a beautiful and desirable woman. He was a guy. It was normal.
She’d walked out on him once and would again when their agreement was fulfilled. Letting her do an end run around his defenses would be worse than stupid. Except the stupid part of him just couldn’t seem to stop hoping they needed to keep trying to make a baby.
Ryleigh looked at the stick from the pregnancy test kit and the negative sign was almost an ironic wink.
Men plan, God laughs.
She could be the poster girl for that saying. Having a baby wasn’t supposed to be complicated. Two friends having sex was supposed to equal a baby. Then they would go their separate ways. But God laughed.
Nick had kissed her.
A full-body contact meeting of their mouths that left her dizzy, shaken and wanting him more than ever. She’d managed to avoid him for the rest of yesterday, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t right there in her head. It was especially annoying when she wanted to sleep. Her idea of a good time didn’t involve tossing and turning all night because he’d kissed her for no apparent reason.
Then God laughed again because she wasn’t pregnant. She’d have to move back into her apartment and figure out the logistics of another try at pregnancy later. Her first thought when she’d awakened before the sun came up was to pack and sneak out under cover of darkness. But that was an incredibly spineless thing to do. Besides, except for that kiss, Nick had been completely decent about this whole thing. He deserved an explanation.
After a quick shower, she dried off, then dressed in jeans and a T-shirt with a glow-in-the-dark jack-o-lantern on the front. Tomorrow was Halloween. Trick or treat. So what else was new? For her, every day seemed to be all tricks and no treats.
She pulled her hair into a ponytail and started out of the bathroom. Her gaze landed on the negative pregnancy test stick, and a wave of emptiness rolled through her again. The feeling made her eyes blurry with tears.
“This is not acceptable,” she said, giving herself a stern look in the mirror. “Pull it together.”
The delicious smell of coffee drifted to her as she went downstairs, proof that Nick was up and around. There was no excuse to put off telling him about her decision.
Ryleigh walked into the kitchen and found herself all alone. “Nick?”
When there was no answer, she poured coffee into the solitary mug sitting by the pot that he must have left for her. There were no sounds to give away his position, so he must have gotten a call from his answering service and gone to the hospital to see a patient. Her being here all alone was the pattern she remembered. As stupid as it was, with him gone she felt lonely as well as empty.
But when the front door opened and closed, the surge of joy rushing through her chased away lonely and empty.
He walked into the kitchen and looked surprised to see her. “You’re up.”
“Wow.” She leaned against the counter and sipped coffee. “You don’t miss anything, do you?”
“Not if I can help it.” He set a square, pink bakery box on the island.
“What’s in there?” She sniffed and picked up the scent of something warm and sweet.
“Before you go all nutrition police on me, I’d like to remind you that calories don’t count on the weekend. And a walk around the neighborhood will neutralize any rogue cholesterol.”
“You didn’t answer the question,” she pointed out.
He looked at the box and there was a fair amount of guilt in his expression. “Donuts.”
“Old-fashioned buttermilk?”
“Yes.”
It was all she could do not to get teary-eyed that he’d remembered her all-time favorite. As comfort food went, it was the most comforting she could think of. And he didn’t even know yet how much she needed it.
Without another word, Ryleigh got small plates out of the cupboard and set them down on the counter. After lifting the cardboard lid, the sweet smell was released full force into the atmosphere and made her mouth water. It looked like half a dozen pastries inside and there wasn’t a single one she didn’t like. She chose a regular old-fashioned, unglazed, then took a bite and savored the satisfying, but not-too-sweet flavor.
“I can get out some fruit to go with it,” Nick offered.
“Not on my account.”
Again he looked surprised. “Your cholesterol is probably shrieking in protest.”
“We all have to live with disappointment.” She ate the whole thing.
“I bought extra, but didn’t think you’d actually have one.”
“Really?” She looked at the five donuts left in the box. “What are you having for breakfast?”
He watched her pick up a chocolate-glazed buttermilk donut. “Crumbs, apparently.”
Ryleigh wasn’t sure whether or not this was the lesser of two evils, but she’d been planning to have ice cream for breakfast. “I’ll save you one.”
“Big of you,” he said dryly.
“Sorry, I can’t help it. This just really hits the spot.” It was as if he’d read her mind and knew she was feeling down. “I think maybe I was craving something like this.”
It was probably the word “crave” that made intensity flare in his eyes. “Are you pregnant?”
To her supreme astonishment and humiliation, her eyes filled with tears. She couldn’t even say the single word. A lump filled her throat that had nothing to do with donuts and everything to do with disappointment so she simply shook her head. In a nanosecond, Nick was in front of her, pulling her into his arms.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Thanks.” His tone seemed sincere, but she
wondered if that’s really the way he felt. She sniffled. “It’s nice of you to say even if you don’t mean it.”
Nick pressed her cheek to his chest and ran his hands up and down her back. “What makes you think I don’t?”
“Because your first reaction when I asked for help was to say no.”
“Maybe I’ve changed my mind.”
“Have you?” With their bodies pressed together, she could practically feel his hesitation. “Do you want a baby?”
“Let’s just say I’m fairly surprised. Out of eighty-eight million, give or take a million of my guys, I didn’t expect all of them to be slackers.”
She laughed in spite of herself. “So it’s your fault?”
“Of course.” With the fingers of one hand, he kneaded the tight muscles in her neck. “You and I and the internet know you were ovulating, so I must be to blame for failing to achieve the objective.”
She slid her arms around his waist. “That’s very comforting and less calories than the half-dozen donuts with an ice cream chaser I was planning for breakfast.”
“I aim to please.”
“Don’t make a habit of it,” she warned.
“Okay. Why?”
“Because such sweet and sensitive behavior could make me fall in love with you again.”
“No way. You’re too smart for that.”
She snorted. “You never heard of that book? Smart Women/Foolish Choices?”
“Sure.” His chest rumbled with laughter. “Right next to Brilliant men, bonehead moves.”
Was he thinking about that kiss? she wondered. “Whatever. It would be against the rules and just plain awful for me to do that, so watch yourself, mister.”
“Okay.” He rested his chin on the top of her head. “Then I’ll just have to get my mean on.”
Ryleigh knew from experience that he could be cynical and distant, but she didn’t believe he had any mean in him. And that was a problem, because feeling those feelings again wasn’t a joke. The way his kiss had made her heart shiver and her knees quiver was proof that sparks were still there for her.
It took an unbelievable amount of effort, but she pushed out of his arms and looked up. “I’m moving back to my apartment, Nick.”
To Have the Doctor's Baby Page 10
