When they stepped outside, they discovered that day had turned to night. The moon was full and bewitching overhead. “My wife, do you see the moon tonight?” Fire Thunder said, gesturing toward it.
“Yes, and I don’t think I have ever seen it look so beautiful,” she murmured, watching it.
Fire Thunder turned to Kaylene. He lifted her chin with a finger so that their eyes met. “The moon herself is a woman,” he said softly. “Tonight she shines brightly just for you, my wife.”
Again he looked heavenward, drawing her eyes there also. “Black Hair is up there in the heavens, perhaps one of the stars that twinkles the brightest tonight,” he said, his voice somewhat shaky. “Or he might be riding a horse spirit and gazing down at us, wishing us well!”
“And we won’t disappoint him, will we, darling?” Kaylene murmured. “Our marriage is going to be the envy of all who know us.”
Fire Thunder turned to her. “I am the envy of all who know me for having won you as my wife,” he said thickly, then kissed her, leaving her weak in the knees as though it were their very first kiss.
Chapter 29
Loved you when the summer deepened into June,
And those fair, wild, ideal dreams of youth
Were there, yet dangerous and half unreal.
As when Endymion kissed the mateless moon.
—VITA SACKVILLE-WEST
Five Years Later—
Her fingers sore and split from having been cattailing with the rest of the Kickapoo Women these past two days, Kaylene walked homeward with several heavy bundles of cattail leaves secured on the back of her burro.
She smiled, to know that she was now a part of the Kickapoo’s lives, blending in well with their customs because of her eagerness to learn them.
But today, now that her cattailing was complete, she was anxious to return home, to her family. She never liked being gone from her two children for any length of time.
And then there was Fire Thunder. How she ached for him in his absence. Theirs was a love affair that was neverending.
Family, she sighed to herself, thinking of the others who were an intricate part of her life.
Anna, ah, sweet Anna, who was always eager to care for her two grandchildren, Kaylene and Fire Thunder’s lovely daughter and handsome son.
Eloisa, her true mother, cherished the moments when Kaylene took her children close enough for her to see them—her grandchildren—and marvel over.
And pretty and delicate Little Sparrow! How she always brightened up a room when she entered.
But Little Sparrow’s being there, in their home, would soon end. When she reached her sixteenth birthday, she would marry Wolf Fire, a young man she had fallen in love with only a few weeks ago, leaving her puppy love for the other young brave behind her.
Wolf Fire was a patient man. He was willing to wait for Little Sparrow to become sixteen. He himself was twenty, and had become a fast friend of Fire Thunder’s. He was Fire Thunder’s sidekick, a brave young warrior who hardly left Fire Thunder’s side when there were things to be done for their people.
Kaylene’s smile faded when she thought of Midnight. Her beloved panther was not at all well. He scarcely ate anymore and he spent most of his time sleeping.
But it comforted Kaylene to know that they had had the best of times together. He had been her salvation during her years of feeling so alone, and dreaming of a day she might find “roots” in her life.
Yes, she would mourn him, as though he were a person. But one could not change one’s destiny. They had lived theirs out, it seemed, and soon it would be time to say a final, sad farewell.
She thought back to the Kickapoo women, with whom she now traveled down the mountainside, and how they had spent their time away from their families these past days. When they had arrived at a distant stream, farther up the mountain than their village, they had quickly set up a temporary camp for shelter.
Each woman had cut enough cattails to make mats and, if necessary, repair the walls of her wigwam. Kaylene was happy that she and Fire Thunder had a cabin, so she did not have to spend as much time wading in the snake-infested stream where the tall cattails grew.
The women offered prayers and tobacco to the snakes that guarded the cattails, promising to take only as many as needed. Once they returned home, they would dry the bundled cattails up against their wigwams, working a few at a time whenever they could find some spare moments away from other chores. It was a laborious process, cleaning the long stalks, then soaking them in hot water until they became pliable enough to work into mats.
As Kaylene moved onward, having encouraged the women to take this different route down the mountainside this time, thinking it might be shorter, she gazed around her at the difference in the foliage. Nothing of nature seemed disturbed. The trees were thick. Flowering vines ran up the trunks of each, sending off a sweet and spicy fragrance.
As she looked up into the trees, Kaylene saw birds she had never seen before as they flitted from limb to limb.
Yes, this way was different than the other side of the mountain, and she remembered now that Fire Thunder had said that this one side was not frequented by his warriors when they went on a hunt, mainly, because of the thickness of the trees and bushes.
Kaylene regretted having come this way. It was hard to squeeze the burros through the denseness of the trees. And she had rips and tears on her skirt caused by the thorny bushes.
Suddenly her heart leaped with surprise and she stopped to listen. Up ahead, through the trees, she thought she had heard someone laughing softly.
She turned to the woman beside her. “Did you hear laughter?” she asked, seeing that the other women had also stopped, and seemed to be scarcely breathing as they also listened.
“Yes, I heard it, but who could it be?” Blue Cloud said. “No one else but we Kickapoo live on this mountain.”
Kaylene turned her head in the direction where she once again heard the laughter. “Someone is here,” she said, her eyes widening in curiosity.
She turned to the women again. “Let’s go and see who it is,” she said, and was surprised to see that none of them seemed willing to.
She gave Blue Cloud a long stare. “Even you are afraid to go with me?” she said, having made a strong bond with this woman, almost the same as she had formed with Running Fawn when they had first become acquainted.
“I shall hold the reins to your burro,” Blue Cloud said, taking them from Kaylene. “I shall stay behind with the others. But do not go too close, yourself, until you see who it is and if they are alone.”
Kaylene inhaled a nervous breath, then turned toward the sound of the laughter again. She had to see who was there. Curiosity was killing her.
She moved stealthily, her hand slipping her cutting knife from the sheath at her left side. When she came to a clearing and she could see more easily what lay ahead of her, her eyes widened in surprise.
She saw a cabin, and outside the cabin there was a beautiful lady sitting on the ground, playing with a small child, a boy who was surely four or five years old.
The woman’s back was to Kaylene.
Then suddenly the woman turned and revealed her face, causing Kaylene’s knees to suddenly weaken with the surprise and shock of the discovery.
“Running Fawn!” she gasped. “It’s Running Fawn!”
Her gaze swept down to the small boy. He was adorable, with his long black hair flowing down his bare back to his waist. His skin was copper, his eyes pitch black. And when he laughed, it sent a warmth through Kaylene.
She then realized that Running Fawn must have been pregnant with Pedro’s son when she had been exiled from the village. That had to mean that Running Fawn had given birth to this child and had raised him alone.
Unless . . . ?
Kaylene looked around and saw no signs of a man living there with Running Fawn.
She took a step closer, stepping on a twig and snapping it with a loud noise. Her presence had been revea
led.
She slipped her knife back inside its sheath and quickly stepped out into the clearing for Running Fawn to see.
She reached a hand out for Running Fawn, to stop her, when she grabbed her son in her arms and started backing toward her door.
“Running Fawn, it is me, Kaylene,” Kaylene said, reaching a hand out for her friend. “It is so good to see you.”
When Running Fawn backed up closer to her door, panic seized Kaylene. “No, Running Fawn, don’t go inside. Please let’s talk.”
“Go away!” Running Fawn cried. “My son and I do not want you here. Leave us alone!”
“Running Fawn, please let me talk to you,” Kaylene pleaded, inching closer. “Tell me how you’ve been. Tell me about your son.”
“No!” Running Fawn cried, tears springing into her eyes. “It is useless! Do not break my heart by coming and then leaving. I do not want to feel the pain again that I felt when I was banished.”
“Things have changed, Running Fawn,” Kaylene cried. “Had we known you were here you would have been invited back to live among your people. Fire Thunder has softened in his mood about the young women of his village and who they do or do not wish to become involved with. Times are slowly changing this particular custom among them.”
“Fire Thunder would never change his mind about me,” Running Fawn said, taking another step toward her door. “I do not want to hear anything you have to say! Little Pedro and I have done quite well on our own! Before he was born I went to San Carlos and managed to steal all that I needed to make life comfortable for me and my son. The seeds I stole give me food each year in my garden. I have never gone back to San Carlos again. We are happy and safe here. We need no one!”
Kaylene suddenly recalled that Pedro had never married. He still loved Running Fawn. “Your son is Pedro Rocendo’s son, is he not?” Kaylene asked. “Pedro would still marry you. I know he would. He has never married. He has even broken ties with his father. Pedro manages a general store. He pines for you, Running Fawn. He has told me this, himself! Come with me now, Running Fawn. Let’s go back to the village. Make peace with your people. Then you can go on to San Carlos. Pedro will give you and your son a good life!”
“You are saying things you do not know are true,” Running Fawn cried. “Why make my life complicated when now it is so simple for me and my son? Surely Pedro has forgotten me.”
“No, he hasn’t,” Kaylene said, moving toward Running Fawn. “I’m telling you the truth when I say that he told me how he still feels about you. He misses you. He is only half a man without you.”
“Kaylene, please stop!” Running Fawn shouted, then turned and ran inside her cabin and slammed the door behind her.
Kaylene was not going to give up that easily. She went to the cabin and opened the door and stepped inside. A fire was burning in the fireplace. The cabin was immaculately clean, but scarce of furniture. Yet it had many comfortable mats everywhere, making Kaylene realize that Running Fawn also frequented the streams to do the cattailing.
“Kaylene, you are not welcome here,” Running Fawn said as she backed away from her, her child held tightly within her arms. “Please leave!”
“Not unless you leave with me,” Kaylene said softly. She moved toward Running Fawn, backing her up against a wall.
When Running Fawn couldn’t move away from her, Kaylene reached a hand out to the child and gently touched his soft, copper face. “I also have a son,” she murmured. “His name is Little Thunder. And I also have a daughter. Her name is Snow Bird. I would love for you to see them, Running Fawn.”
Running Fawn offered no response.
“Do you remember how close we were?” Kaylene said, now reaching to Running Fawn’s hair, and stroking it. “Do you remember brushing my hair, and how you refused to let me comb it in Fire Thunder’s lodge? I couldn’t understand. I didn’t know then that it was a taboo thing to do. Now I know so much about your people and their customs. I love being among them. Please come back with me. If Fire Thunder had known that you were this close, living alone with your child, he would have come for you, himself.”
“As he would my other three friends?” Running Fawn said sarcastically.
“Where are they. Do you know?” Kaylene asked softly.
“No, I have not seen them since they left with me that day from our village,” Running Fawn said. She laughed sarcastically. “They are probably even dead, and what would our chief care if they were?”
“He cares,” Kaylene admonished her. “And he regrets many things and has made changes that suit his heart more than before. Always before, he followed the strict teachings of the Kickapoo. But now, as times change so has he. He is still a great leader, but much more lenient than before.”
“I would not believe it, even if I saw it,” Running Fawn spat out.
Then Running Fawn’s eyes blinked. “I would so much like for my father to see his grandson,” she said, her voice breaking. “How is my father, Kaylene? Has he ever married, to fill the void left there by so many things in his life?”
The sudden realization that Running Fawn wasn’t aware of her father’s death made Kaylene’s insides tighten and grow cold. Oh, how she dreaded having to tell her, but she must. Running Fawn had been deprived already of too much. She should not be deprived of knowing about her father’s death any longer.
“Your father, Running Fawn, is—”
She didn’t get the rest of the words out before Running Fawn gasped and paled. “I see it in your eyes and hear it in your voice that you have no good news about my father,” she said, a sob lodging in her throat. “He is dead. My father is dead!”
“Yes, Black Hair is dead,” Kaylene said, her voice drawn.
Running Fawn began sobbing. She turned her eyes away from Kaylene, then turned slowly toward her again. “How?” she said, composing herself for the sake of her son. “How did my father die?”
Kaylene knew that telling her how Black Hair had died might even be worse than telling her that he was dead. “You don’t want to know,” she blurted out.
“I deserve to know,” Running Fawn said flatly. “I want to know.”
“He died shortly after you left the village,” Kaylene said softly. “No one knows who is truly responsible. They found him . . . hanging . . . from a tree. Someone hung him.”
Running Fawn was dying a slow death inside, but again for her child, kept her feelings to herself. “Please leave, Kaylene,” she said, her voice void of emotion. “I want to be alone with my son.”
“I’ll leave now, but I will be back,” Kaylene said, leaving a soft kiss on the child’s cheek. Her eyes looked into Running Fawn’s. “I’ve seen your son. Now I so badly want you to see mine.”
Running Fawn stared silently at Kaylene as she drifted toward the door.
“I will be back,” Kaylene said, then turned and ran from the cabin.
When she got outside, she broke into tears for the heartache that she had brought to Running Fawn. Now she regretted having found them. They seemed to have been living a life of peace and harmony.
“Now what should I truly do?” Kaylene whispered to herself as she turned and gave the cabin one last look before joining the other women. “Should I leave her alone? Or come back for her?”
Chapter 30
With tongues all sweet and low,
Like a pleasant rhyme,
They tell how much I owe
To thee and Time!
—BARRY CORNWALL
“Then you will allow Running Fawn to return from exile?” Kaylene asked, looking anxiously at Fire Thunder.
She had just told him about having found Running Fawn, and her son. She had pleaded Running Fawn’s case and now awaited his response.
“You said that you told her about her father,” Fire Thunder said, turning to look down at the flames stroking the logs in the fireplace.
Everything was quiet in the lodge. Midnight was sleeping on the hearth, close to the warmth of the fire.
&n
bsp; Both of Kaylene and Fire Thunder’s children were asleep in the bedroom they shared with Little Sparrow.
Little Sparrow was away from the village, riding horseback with her betrothed.
“Yes, I told her, and she became very distraught,” Kaylene said as Fire Thunder turned slowly to face her again. “It’s cruel to leave her there alone, not only because of her torment over having lost a father, but also because of little Pedro. He needs to know more people than his mother to grow up and be a normal child.”
“She could have gone into San Carlos long ago and made a life for herself,” Fire Thunder argued. “No one was there stopping her.”
“But she was doing as you told her to do,” Kaylene murmured, keeping to herself the secret that Running Fawn had gone into San Carlos, if only that one time. “You forbade her to see Pedro again. If she had gone into San Carlos to live, she would have seen him.”
“Yes, I forbade her to see him again, and here you are asking me not to only allow her to return to her people, but also to go to the very man who took part in turning her away from what was right for her, a Kickapoo,” Fire Thunder said.
Then he drew Kaylene into his arms. “Yet, I do see the need for the boy to be raised around people,” he said thickly. “And, yes, he does need his father, a man we both know has never married because of his love for Running Fawn.”
When Kaylene realized that Fire Thunder was weakening in his decision about Running Fawn, her heart began to pound with an excitement she had to keep from him, until he gave her the answer she so badly wanted.
“What are you saying?” Kaylene asked softly, leaning away from him, looking up at him.
“I have something to do,” Fire Thunder said as he broke away from her. “I will be only a minute.”
Kaylene nodded and watched him leave.
Sighing, she began to pace back and forth. She started to clasp her hands nervously behind her back but the cuts from cattailing pained her, and she quickly drew them apart again.
She turned and stared at Fire Thunder as he came back into the lodge.
Wild Whispers Page 31
