by Amy Cross
"Great," I mutter, taking my first tentative steps toward the red ward. I feel totally unprepared for this kind of thing, and it's a little bit like I've just been thrown into my first shift without any training at all. I'd expected the first night to be a little more mellow, with a less steep learning curve. As I reach the first door, I take a deep breath and tell myself that this is just a job, and there's no reason why I can't be a success. I put my hand on the door handle, but it takes me a moment to psych myself up to the point that I can actually go inside. "Okay," I whisper to myself before finally pushing the door open and peering into the darkness.
Chapter Two
Eleven years ago
"You've got a stain," says my father, kneeling down and examining the spot of ketchup that dropped onto my dress during lunch. I'd hoped he might not notice, but now he seems pissed off. Grabbing a napkin from the table, he spits on his finger and starts trying to get the ketchup out. It doesn't help that my dress is white.
"Sorry," I say, glancing over at the waitress behind the counter. She smiles when she notices me, but then she goes back to cleaning the coffee machine.
"It's okay," my father says, clearly getting stressed, "but you want to look your best for Mommy today, don't you? She's been waiting almost two weeks to see you, and I told her all about your new dress". He finishes wiping the stain away. "There. Most of it's gone. You're proud of your new dress, aren't you?"
I nod. I don't really care very much about the new dress at all, but my father wants me to care, so I make the effort.
"We should get going," he says, glancing at his watch. "Juliet, can you wait right here while I go to the rest-room?"
I nod again.
"Don't wander off," he continues. "Don't talk to strangers. Don't do anything. Just stand here and wait for me, okay? I'll be two minutes, maximum". He turns and hurries over to the rest-room, leaving me standing by our booth.
"You going somewhere nice, honey?" asks the waitress, smiling.
I look over at her.
"You're all dressed up," she adds. "I wish I'd had a pretty little dress like that when I was younger. Is it new?"
I stare at her. She's a stranger, but I'm pretty sure it's okay to talk to her. After all, she's not a man. Still, I've always been told not to talk to people I don't know, and I really don't want to get into trouble. Not today, of all days.
"I'm going to the hospital," I say eventually.
"Oh," the waitress replies, and I can see the hint of doubt in her eyes. Suddenly she's not sure what to say. It's kind of fun to see how I've put her off her stride.
"It's not for me," I continue. "It's for my Mom. She lives there".
"Does she?" she replies. "Well, I hope she doesn't have to live there for much longer".
"I don't think she will," I say.
"That's good". With that, she turns and starts wiping the counter. I guess she doesn't want to talk to me any more, which is fine.
Glancing over at the rest-room door, I see that there's still no sign of my father. I turn to the table, take the ketchup bottle, squeeze a dollop onto my finger, and carefully add a small red dot to the shoulder of my dress. Wiping the rest of the ketchup off my finger, I smile as I look at the dot. It's small, no bigger than a penny, but my father will definitely notice it eventually, and then he'll get into that funny mood again where he's clearly mad but he doesn't want to be angry with me. Sometimes it's funny to make my father get a little mad, especially on a day like today.
Chapter Three
Today
The room is so dark, it takes a moment before I can make out the shape of a bed. As my eyes become accustomed to the gloom, I finally see that there's a person under the bedsheets, but I don't hear any snoring. I take a tentative step into the room, but the person still seems completely still and quiet. It'd be just my luck to stumble upon a dead resident on my very first night. Creeping closer, I desperately watch for any sign of the bedsheets rising and falling. I swear to God, if this person turns out to be dead, I'm quitting.
Suddenly the figure in the bed sniffs and rolls over, and then he opens his eyes and stares straight at me.
"Sorry," I say, taking a step back. "I was just..." My heart is pounding and I have no idea what to tell him. "Just go back to sleep. Everything's fine. I was just checking on you to make sure you're alive". Once I've backed out into the corridor, I pull the door shut and stand completely still, listening out for any sign that the man might be getting out of bed. After a moment, I turn the handle and open the door again; I immediately see that the man in the bed is still staring at me.
"Sorry," I say again, quickly pulling the door shut. "Fuck!" Deciding the best thing would be to just leave him alone, I walk along to the next door. Fortunately, this time I hear snoring as soon as I step into the room, so I back out and move along the corridor until I reach another door. Just as I'm about to check the third resident, I glance over at the final door and realize that it's already slightly ajar. Hurrying over, I look inside the room and immediately see that the bed is empty.
"Great," I mutter under my breath. "A walker".
I turn and make my way along the corridor, determined to find the missing resident. I mean, these people are all in their seventies or older, so I really don't see how one of them can be too difficult to track down. It's not like he can climb out through a window, or even walk very fast. Surely this has to be the easiest part of the job, right? When I get to the next junction and realize there's no sign of him or her, however, I pull my phone out of my pocket and bring up Lizzie's number.
"How's it going?" she asks, her voice a little distorted over the choppy connection.
"One of the rooms is empty," I say. "Room 109. The door was open when I got here, and there's no sign of anyone".
"Room 109 is Mr. Jenkins," Lizzie replies. "Did you check to see if the bed felt warm?"
"Uh, no," I reply, hurrying back to the room and putting my hand on the sheets for a moment. "Kind of," I say.
"Then he hasn't been out for too long," Lizzie says. "Mr. Jenkins is one of the more active residents. He tends to wander off quite a lot, but he'll be somewhere in the building. If the others on the ward are all asleep, you're going to have to go and walk around the corridors until you find him. Remember, he could be anywhere. Some of the residents get a little confused, and they make some odd decisions. Check cupboards, check behind the sofas in the rec room, basically check any space that a human could fit into. Seriously, don't under-estimate the capacity that these people have for slipping into weird places".
"Okay," I say. "I'll go take a look".
"But don't worry too much," she continues. "Mr. Jenkins is a nice guy. You won't have any trouble with him once you find him. Just watch out for his wandering hands. He gets a little frisky sometimes".
Once I've put the phone away, I start wandering the corridors, keeping an eye out for any sign that Mr. Jenkins has passed this way. I look in every cupboard and under every table, and I check the rec room twice over. After half an hour, I head back to his room, just in case he's made his own way to bed, but there's still no sign of him. I start checking all the external doors and windows, but I don't see how he could possibly have got out of the building. Still, if this guy's hiding somewhere, he's doing a damn good job. I take out my mobile phone and look for Lizzie's number as I head along to the corridor where I started.
Just as I'm about to hit the Call button on my phone, however, I see the door to the abandoned ward up ahead, and this time it's open. Whereas earlier there was a padlock over the handles, and tape stuck all around the edges, now the door has been unsealed. I stare ahead at the dusty, brightly-lit corridor, and it occurs to me that this is really the only part of the building I haven't checked yet. Grabbing hold of the door, I take a look at the padlock and find that although it has been opened, there's no sign of a key. I guess maybe someone forgot to lock it up properly, and now Mr. Jenkins has taken the opportunity to go for a midnight wander.
"Mr. Jenkins!" I call out, leaning through the doorway. I'm immediately struck by how the abandoned ward feels quite a lot colder than the rest of the building. Above, a long electric strip light is buzzing and flickering. Frankly, I don't feel much like wandering around in a bunch of deserted corridors, but at the same time it seems like this is by far the most likely place for Mr. Jenkins have got lost. I try calling Lizzie on my phone, but this time she doesn't answer. Figuring I'd better show some initiative, I step through into the abandoned corridor and immediately feel that something's different; it's as if the air in here is different somehow, or the energy of the place is slightly off-kilter.
"Mr. Jenkins!" I call out, desperately hoping that he'll come running to me once he hears a friendly voice. I walk along the corridor, and it feels like I'm the first person to come into this part of the building for a long time. When I get to the first junction, I glance around and see nothing but another set of corridors. I really don't see why Mr. Jenkins would have come down here, especially since it's so cold compared to the hothouse of the rest of the building, but I guess maybe some of the old guys around here aren't entirely logical. I open a nearby cupboard, half expecting that there'll be an old man coiled up inside, but the only thing I find is a small furry blob that appears to be a mummified rat.
"Mr. Jenkins!" I call yet again as I slam the cupboard door shut, my voice echoing along the lonely corridor. Figuring he might be scared, I decide to try another approach. "Mr. Jenkins, my name's Juliet," I call out loudly. "There's no need to be scared, I'm just looking for you so I can help you get back to bed!" I start walking toward the next door. "It's cold in here! Don't you want to come back to your bedroom?" I pull the door open and find myself looking in at a bare, abandoned room. This was clearly home to one of the residents in the past, but all the furniture has been moved out. "Come on, Mr. Jenkins," I mutter under my breath, "let's just get out of here".
I walk along to the next door, which opens to reveal yet another empty room. Sighing, I move on and check all the doors, but once again I come up with nothing. I find the old rec room, dusty and abandoned, but there's still no sign of Mr. Jenkins, and I'm starting to think that maybe he didn't come this way at all or, if he did, maybe he's left and gone back to the main part of the building. Figuring I need some help, I decide to try calling Lizzie again, but her phone rings and rings without her picking up. Just as I'm about to cut the call off, however, I realize I can hear something nearby. I turn to look along one of the corridors; somewhere in one of the other rooms, I can hear a phone ringing.
I cut the call on my phone, and the ringing stops. I redial Lizzie's number, and I hear the other phone ringing nearby again. Feeling slightly creeped out by the situation, I cautiously walk along the corridor, getting closer and closer to the ringing sound. Eventually I come to a brightly-lit, open-tiled room that seems to have been some kind of bathroom for this ward. There are some showers on one side of the room, and there are a couple of toilet cubicles along with some sinks, and there's a large drain in the middle of the floor. I step through the door, and the ringing is definitely coming from in here. At first, I can't quite find the exact source, but eventually I realize there's a phone lodged behind a grating on the wall. It doesn't take much effort to get the cover off the grating, and I carefully remove the ringing phone.
When I press the green button to accept the call, I pause for a moment before speaking into my own phone.
"Hello?" I say, immediately hearing my voice coming from the other phone.
I take a deep breath, trying to understand why Lizzie's phone would be hidden behind a grating in the abandoned part of the building. I turn and glance around the bathroom, but there's no sign of anyone else in here. I try to tell myself that it's just some kind of weird coincidence, and that I've made a mistake, but something doesn't feel right about this situation. I carefully put Lizzie's phone back in the slot behind the grating, before replacing the cover and taking a step away. For a moment, it occurs to me that I should just go back to the main part of the building and look for Lizzie, but I can't help thinking that maybe she's nearby. I turn to walk away, and -
"Fuck!" I shout as I realize there's an old man standing behind me. I step back, my heart racing, and it takes a moment before I realize this must be the elusive Mr. Jenkins. He's standing just inside the doorway, staring intently at me. "Sorry," I say, trying to calm myself down, even though my heart is racing.
He doesn't say anything. He just stares at me, almost as if he's looking straight through me. I glance over my shoulder, trying to work out what he's looking at.
"I've been trying to find you," I say, hoping to get him talking. "You're supposed to be in bed. Don't you want to get back to your room?" I wait for him to answer, but he just keeps staring at me. "Come on," I say, stepping toward him and putting a hand on his arm. "I'll take you back to your room".
"Who are you?" he asks suddenly, his voice sounding deep and dry.
"My name's Juliet," I reply, forcing a smile. "I'm here to help you".
"Did they hire a new night girl?" he asks.
"Yeah". I pause for a moment. "Come on, let's get you back to bed," I add, gently pulling on his arm. "You're gonna get cold if you stay through here. Like, pneumonia or something".
"I knew they'd hire a new one," he says, refusing to budge. "They just bring in some kid and set her loose on us with no training. It's not right".
"I guess not," I say, "but let's get you -"
"What's your name?" he asks, interrupting me.
"Juliet," I reply.
"Juliet?" He pauses for a moment. "That's not a bad name. Better than a lot of the names people give their kids these days".
"Thanks," I say, "but -"
"This is where it happened, you know," he continues, pointing across the room. "Right over there".
"Where what happened?" I ask.
"The girl who died," he replies, frowning at me. "Don't you know anything?"
I follow his gaze, realizing he's pointing at the floor on the opposite side, over by the showers. "Yeah," I say, "I mean, I know there was a nurse who died here, but I didn't know where it happened". I take a deep breath, not really sure what to say.
"It was right there," he says, still pointing at the wall. "They found her in that exact spot. Right there". He pauses for a moment, as if he's lost in thought. "Do you know who actually found her, though? Do you? It was me". He sniffs. "I used to be on this ward, before they shut it down. This all happened months ago, but I still remember it like it was yesterday. It was late at night, just like it is now. I heard a noise somewhere nearby, like someone getting all upset, and I got out of bed to see what was wrong. By the time I got through here, it was all over". He stares across the room. "It's not right, you know".
"You found the body?" I ask hesitantly.
He nods. "She was a pretty girl," he continues, "but there was so much blood. You don't realize how much blood there is in a person, not until you see it drain out all over the place. It was everywhere. You know the worst thing? They never even cleaned it all up properly. I'll show you". He suddenly lurches forward, tottering unsteadily on his stiff legs, and I follow him, keeping hold of his arm in case he falls. "Right here," he continues, pointing down at the tiles. "You see? Right there. You see it?"
I look closer and see a dark stain in the grouting between some of the tiles. "Is that blood?" I ask.
"Course it is," he says. "They hired in this outside company to come and clean up the mess, but they didn't do a very good job, did they? They should have picked up everything and thrown it away, but they just wiped it all down, collected their fee, and left little bits of her in the cracks".
"Yeah," I say, a little lost for words, "Maybe we should get going".
"It's not right," Mr. Jenkins continues. "They should have cleaned up properly. It's not respectful. Do you think it's right?"
"No," I say, staring at the stain between the tiles.
"And you know what's ev
en worse?" He pauses for a moment. "After they'd finished cleaning up, they put all the waste in black bags and left it in the back yard for a week. I saw it every day and I always knew what it was. Tissues and towels soaked in her blood".
"Come on," I say, still trying to get him to come with me. "It doesn't help to stand here in the cold and think about bad things, does it?" As soon as the words leave my lips, I realize how inane I must seem. I wish I could think of something meaningful or powerful to say. "I'm sure it was very sad," I add, "but you need to rest".
"When I found her," he continues, resisting my attempt to lead him away, "I went to get some help. I knew it was too late, but I thought maybe there was a chance. At first, no-one believed me. They thought I was a stupid old man, imagining things. One of them even told me I was having a flashback to the war. Eventually I got one of the nurses to come with me, and finally she believed me when she saw it all with her own eyes".
"Who did it?" I ask.
"What do you mean?" he replies, frowning. "Don't ask stupid questions. She did it herself".
I stare at him. "She -"
"Right here," he says, interrupting me. "There was always something a little bit off about her. Something in her eyes. It was like she was always a bit sad, even when she was happy. I still never thought..." He pauses for a moment. "It's not right when someone does that. She had her life ahead of her, and she threw it away".
"Come on," I say, gently leading him to the door. "You should get back to your room".
"I've seen some things in my life," he continues as we slowly walk away from the room where the woman died. "Never seen so much blood come out of one person, though. And the look on her face was... That's gonna haunt me for the rest of my days. Not that I've got many days left, but you know what I mean. All that blood, and she was just staring straight ahead as if nothing was wrong, almost like she was relieved it was over".
