by Lucy Clark
He glanced once more towards CJ’s door. Would she want to ask him more questions or would she respect his privacy? ‘Probably the latter,’ he murmured to himself. Both of them had been through marriages that, from what she’d said about her husband, hadn’t been the happiest, and both of them had lost the opportunity to change the outcome. If Abigail had survived, he’d vowed to himself to be a better husband, to be more attentive, to help her, to listen to her more. Ethan sighed heavily. But she hadn’t survived. She’d been taken from him and so had—
He stopped the thought. He may be trying to be more open, to be more communicative, especially with the people who mattered most in his life, but dwelling on such heartbreak would not help him at all this morning, especially when he had a clinic to attend to.
He glanced again at the door that led to her part of the house. Perhaps he should just check on her before he left; after all, with the anxiety she’d been exhibiting during their early morning tête-à-tête, he wanted to see for himself that she was indeed OK.
‘Professional concern,’ he muttered to himself as he knocked softly on the door. He’d check on her and then he’d be able to give Donna a report of what had happened, keeping CJ’s doctor in the loop as to her patient’s emotional state. He listened carefully for a moment but didn’t hear anything. Slowly he opened the door and walked quietly towards her room.
The door was open and he heard her steady breathing before he saw her. Good. She was sleeping. Relaxed, sleeping and surrounded by a horde of pillows. He headed back to the kitchen relieved she was doing fine. After discovering his own wife had had pre-eclampsia and had kept it from him, Ethan was more than a little cautious when it came to pregnant women in their last trimester. As far as he was concerned, Abigail’s death, and that of his gorgeous little baby girl, would not be in vain. Not on his watch.
* * *
CJ woke up in exactly the same position in which she’d gone to sleep, indicating she’d had a great sleep. Checking the clock, she was astonished to find it was after ten in the morning. Her first instinct was to scramble out of bed and rush over to the clinic, before she remembered that Ethan was here.
A smile instantly spread across her lips at the thought of her housemate. Ethan had come to Pridham so that she could rest and look after herself. Where she’d thought she might have been bored, right now, she felt a wave of stress leave her. That was very nice.
She sighed again and stroked her stomach. ‘Thank you, sweetheart,’ she told her baby, ‘for letting Mummy have a good sleep. Do you feel good too, my honey?’ Taking her time, CJ showered and dressed, singing in the shower and keeping up a steady dialogue with her unborn child. ‘We’re going to relax this morning because Ethan’s doing the clinic. Then we’ll go and visit some people this afternoon so we can introduce him to today’s house call list.’
Secretly she hoped they could do the house calls in his awesome car. It was nice they shared the same interest, especially as she and Quinten hadn’t really enjoyed the same hobbies or activities. Being able to talk to Ethan about car engines, about the stitching on the leather seats, about sourcing difficult parts that were out of stock—that sort of thing was wonderful. It meant she wasn’t having to watch what she said in case she said something to upset him, as she had with Quinten.
Now, though, she realised the reason Quinten had often picked an argument with her had been because he’d felt guilty about wanting to leave her. They’d been a wrong fit right from the start. CJ sighed and headed to the kitchen. Once again the kitchen was tidy and she was thankful Ethan wasn’t a messy slob, like Quinten.
Why she was comparing the two men, she had no idea. Perhaps it was because, apart from her father, they were the only other men she’d lived with. Yes, Ethan was showing promising signs of being a great housemate and, hopefully, a great friend, too. She ignored the little voice at the back of her mind that questioned the way that one smouldering look from Ethan could ignite a fire within her such as she’d never experienced before. She didn’t want to acknowledge the fire or the spark because if she gave it too much thought, she might end up making another mistake, and where romance and love were concerned, she’d already made her fair share.
Besides, any crazy emotions she felt towards Ethan were no doubt due to her overactive pregnancy hormones and nothing more. Once the baby was born, the crazy feelings would stop and she would return to normal...she hoped.
Added to that was the fact he’d told her about his wife. He was a widower who was still coming to terms with his grief. Perhaps being in Pridham would help him to heal, help him to accept his past and move forward into a less stressful future. CJ hoped she’d be able to support him through that, but as nothing more than a friend.
Her phone buzzed, bringing her thoughts back to the present, and she checked the text message. She was pleasantly surprised to find it was from Ethan, the message stating an ultrasound had been booked for her in two hours’ time.
‘How sweet. He’s so sweet, baby,’ she told her child. ‘Sweet and thoughtful.’ CJ shook her head. ‘No. Not sweet, he’s being professional and helpful...and thoughtful, but then he is a doctor and therefore is supposed to be thoughtful and helpful and professional.’ She frowned as she decided what text message to send back but after typing several messages and then deleting them because they either sounded too personal or too sterile, she decided on sending emojis—one of a smiley face and one showing a thumbs-up.
‘Why is this so hard? The line between housemate, friend, professional colleague, keeping out of each other’s way or helping each other out, and...’ She trailed off, sighing once more. ‘Well, at any rate, I have time to get a few things done before the scan so up we get.’ She rubbed the little foot that was sticking out, urging it back into place. ‘Let’s wash your new clothes so they’re all ready when you arrive. That way, they’ll feel all fresh and lovely rather than musty and starchy.’ As she hadn’t wanted to know the sex of the baby, CJ had stuck with buying pastels and cute outfits that would suit either gender. By the time she was due at the hospital, the outside washing line was filled with the tiny outfits being blown gently by the autumn breeze, and CJ’s nesting instinct had been satisfied.
As she walked across the road, she couldn’t help the slight spring in her step and knew it was because she would be seeing Ethan soon. She felt good, she felt happy and it was simply because he’d cared enough to suggest making this scan appointment so her mind would continue to be at ease, especially through the night when her fears usually raised their ugly heads.
Stopping at the clinic first, she was interested to see how Ethan had been coping. As she walked into the waiting room, she found Donna quietly discussing something with Tania, two patients still waiting.
‘What are you doing here? I was about to go over and meet you at the hospital,’ Donna stated as soon as she saw CJ. ‘I hope you’ve been resting.’
‘I can’t be resting every minute of the day, Donna,’ she countered with a good-natured smile. ‘I slept in until ten o’clock, had a leisurely breakfast and managed to get all the baby’s clothes washed and on the line.’ She paused for a moment. ‘Wait—what do you mean, you were going to meet me at the hospital?’
‘For the ultrasound,’ Donna stated. ‘Ethan asked me to make the appointment. He seemed quite concerned about you.’ Donna fixed CJ with a worried look. ‘You should have told me you had concerns. You know I’m there to support you for whatever you need.’
CJ shrugged. ‘I guess with Quinten always saying I made mountains out of molehills, I sometimes feel as though I’m still overreacting—to anything and everything. Besides, the neurotic thoughts I have in the middle of the night often ease during the light of day. And I did try to call you but you were at Whitecorn.’
Donna frowned. ‘I didn’t know you’d called.’
‘Night sister answered your phone.’
‘Ah, yes. I�
�d left it at the nurses’ station before treating Mr Bartlett.’
‘Oh, no. Mr Bartlett? Is he—?’
Donna held up her hand to stop CJ’s questions. ‘He’s stable.’
She sighed with relief. ‘He was another good friend of my dad’s. I hope he’s able to pull through.’
‘You and me both.’
* * *
The phone on Tania’s desk buzzed and she quickly answered it. ‘Yes. I’ll tell her,’ she replied, then nodded to her colleagues. ‘The sonographer is ready for you.’
‘Head on over, CJ. I won’t be far behind you,’ Donna said.
‘OK. Thanks.’ CJ started to head out the door that led to the hospital but as she did so, Ethan came out of his consulting room with a patient. The patient stopped, grinning brightly at the sight of CJ. Pleasantries were exchanged, the patient placed their hands on the baby bump and gave their prediction as to the gender before heading towards the waiting room. All the while, CJ was highly conscious of Ethan’s presence.
He’d looked mildly startled to see her when he’d exited the consulting room and after nodding and smiling politely at her, he’d stepped back and not said a word. After the patient had left, CJ found she couldn’t move, found that she wanted to stay where she was and just be near him, despite knowing what she now did about his wife. It was odd.
‘How’s everything going?’ she asked.
‘Very well. Everything is set up—the consulting room, the computer system—to work like a well-oiled machine and that’s exactly what’s been happening.’
‘Good. Good.’ A moment of uncomfortable silence passed.
‘Er...’ Ethan gestured towards the direction of the hospital. ‘Heading over for the scan?’
‘Yes. Yes...thanks for letting Donna know. Sometimes I think I’m being too over-dramatic and other times—’
He held up his hand to stop her. ‘You’re welcome.’ Another moment of strained silence passed. ‘Uh... I’d better go call my next patient in.’
‘Sure.’ She jerked her thumb towards the hospital. ‘I’d better have that scan.’
He nodded again, then took a step towards her and said softly, ‘Let me know the results.’
CJ held his gaze and there it was again...a zinging of awareness between them, as though there was something happening between them that neither of them had either asked for, or wanted.
‘I...uh...had hoped to be there but I have...’ He pointed towards the waiting room.
She shook her head and smiled at his words. How sweet of him. ‘Oh, it’s OK. Of course you’re busy and if anyone’s going to understand—’
‘It’s you,’ he finished for her. And there it was again, the undercurrent of a conversation they weren’t articulating. CJ licked her suddenly dry lips and Ethan’s gaze dropped to follow the action with great interest. ‘I, uh...checked in on you this morning to ensure you were OK but you were sleeping. Very soundly,’ he added as an afterthought, that gorgeous smile of his appearing and creating havoc with her heart.
It took a moment for her to realise what he was saying, and her eyes widened in mortification. ‘I was snoring!’ She raised her hands to cover her face and was rewarded with a soft chuckle from Ethan. The sound washed over her and filled her with utter delight before she removed her hands and heaved a heavy sigh. ‘Well, you’ve already heard me being ill so let’s just add snoring to the list.’
‘Were you sick this morning?’
‘No. Actually, I wasn’t.’ It wasn’t until he’d asked the question that she realised she hadn’t even thought about it.
‘Probably because you were able to sleep in and not rush around first thing in the morning.’
‘More than likely.’ She smiled at him once more. ‘And it’s all thanks to you.’
He held up his hands but his smile was still in place. ‘Hey, I’m just here doing my job. I’m not a hero or a saint.’
‘Are you still here?’ Donna remarked as she walked towards the two of them. Ethan quickly stepped back, putting distance between himself and CJ.
‘I was just checking to see how Ethan was coping,’ CJ remarked.
‘He’s doing fine. Now come on, the sonographer is waiting for you.’ Donna put her hand in the middle of CJ’s back, urging her forward. ‘Let Ethan get back to work. He still has several patients to see before house calls this afternoon.’
‘I’ll see you then,’ CJ said to Ethan over her shoulder as Donna continued to usher her towards the hospital. Ethan knew he shouldn’t stand there and watch her go but it was only a second later that she disappeared from view.
‘What the heck just happened?’ he whispered to himself as he headed to the waiting room to call his next patient through. As he worked his way through the rest of the clinic, he kept his questions at the back of his mind. Why was it that whenever he was within close proximity to CJ he couldn’t stop staring at her mouth? He’d told her about his wife, how he was a widower, so clearly she understood that he was a man who hadn’t dealt with his grief...didn’t she? Perhaps he needed to make it clear that he wasn’t interested in a relationship with anyone. He’d told her he wanted to just do his work and when his contract was up he planned to return to his life in Sydney.
But as he wrote up the notes for his last patient, he couldn’t help but compare the life he’d had in that small apartment to the one he now enjoyed here. Although he’d only been in Pridham for less than a week, with the people he’d met, the acceptance he’d received, the support he’d been given, he had to admit he found it quite encompassing. He’d been able to breathe deeply, to fill his lungs completely and without stabbing pains. When he’d checked his own blood pressure, it was to find it at a far more acceptable reading and he was actually sleeping three to four hours per night. How could he be seeing such incredible results in such a short space of time?
Was it down to CJ’s easygoing manner? He did like hearing the sound of her voice, he did like seeing her smile and, more importantly, he liked being the one to make her smile. He liked the way she smelled, of sunshine and happiness. He liked her gumption, that she accepted her lot in life and was prepared to get on with what needed doing. She wasn’t wallowing in a pit of despair, lamenting about being left as a single parent. Naturally she had concerns and he was honoured that she’d felt comfortable enough to share them with him, and that he’d been able to do something to help.
He glanced at the clock on the wall. She should well and truly be done with her ultrasound by now and he wondered what the results were. Was she feeling more relaxed, more at ease? Was her blood pressure stable? Did she have any excess swelling around her ankles? He wanted to remain vigilant, to ensure she didn’t fall victim to the same condition that had taken his wife. Granted, the circumstances were different and CJ was definitely looking after herself, but pre-eclampsia could turn to eclampsia far too quickly and then...
At the sound of feminine laughter, laughter that sounded a lot like CJ’s tinkling laugh, coming from the direction of the waiting room, Ethan stopped his thoughts from progressing into the dark abyss, and quickly finished his work before heading out to where she was.
Sure enough, CJ was there, sitting in one of the waiting-room chairs, her feet up on a stack of magazines on the coffee table. Donna was leaning against the receptionist counter and Tania was twirling a pen between her fingers. His gaze settled back on CJ, pleased to see her resting.
‘How did everything go?’ He wasn’t going to beat around the bush. She was his colleague and he was worried about her.
‘Good.’ She smiled brightly and rubbed her belly.
‘Blood pressure is down, swelling is within normal parameters and the baby’s head is engaged. I’ve also done a urine test—all clear, no protein.’ Donna was the one to give him the medical report and he smiled at her before taking a closer look at CJ’s ankles for himself. Yes, they were g
ood. The tension started to leave him now that he knew she really was OK.
‘Are you all right?’ CJ asked him softly as the telephone rang. Tania answered it and told Donna it was for her. Donna headed off to her consulting room and Tania went to the bathroom. It wasn’t until they were alone that she reiterated the question.
‘Yes, I’m fine. It’s you I’ve been concerned about.’
‘You have?’
‘Of course.’ He sat down in the chair opposite her, the coffee table between them.
‘Why?’
‘Why? Because, as I’m sure you know, a lot of things can go wrong in the last trimester. It’s better to be safe than sorry.’
CJ smiled. ‘Are you always this adamant with the patients? Don’t get me wrong,’ she continued before he could respond, ‘it’s a good thing, especially in general practice.’
‘Not all surgeons are scalpel happy,’ he replied. ‘Some of us actually do care about our patients.’ Even as he said the words, he knew he hadn’t been as concerned about some of his patients as he should have been. It was simply because he hadn’t wanted to engage with the personal aspect, preferring to leave that up to his registrars. Getting personally involved with people would have required the wall he’d built around his heart to be broken down and he hadn’t been ready for that. He wasn’t sure if he was ready for it now but whether he wanted that wall to come down or not, it was happening and it was all because of the woman opposite him.
‘Ready for house calls?’ she asked, lifting her feet from the table and shifting in her chair, preparing to lever herself up. Ethan was quickly at her side, holding out his hands to help her up. ‘Thank you.’ As she stood, he once again found himself in close proximity to her hypnotic gaze and encompassing scent.