I told myself repeatedly that I wasn’t alone anymore. She would be back, and I had my brothers… I had my daughter. I felt the waves of panic recede like the tide going out.
Hollywood walked up behind me, causing me to jump slightly before I hid it behind rubbing my hands over my face and through my hair.
“Hey, man, you okay?” he asked me in a low tone.
“Yeah, bro, I’m good. I’m just really worried about her, and it’s just giving me a really bad feeling. It’s probably nothing, but I can’t shake it.” I shook my head and stuffed my hands in my pockets.
“Your instincts are pretty finely tuned, bro, but I think it’s probably just the thought of her being so far away and that dickhole being out there. Things will be fine and these next couple of weeks will go by faster than you think. Hacker hooked up her phone, right?” I nodded. “All right then, don’t worry, man. She knows what to do if anything goes to shit. Oh, and by the way, I didn’t know you could put on such a show.” He gave a wicked grin and laughed as he took off running before I could catch him and beat his smart ass. Little fucker. In truth, I really didn’t give a rat’s ass if every brother heard me fucking her. Good, I thought. Let them all know I was claiming her and they could keep their hands and eyes off her. I shook my head and began laughing myself.
I grinned as I thought, I need to go shopping; my baby girl needs a car seat.
THE TRIP BACK WAS way too long and boring as hell, resulting in too much time to think. I began to question the sanity of leaving my bugga-boo behind and leaving my job and apartment all to chase the dream of owning my own place. I knew the Oasis had the history of being a steady business, but was I really cut out to be a bar owner, and would the improvements I had in mind chase away customers who were loyal to Mama Jean? Would they be resistant to change? I would lose my parents’ investment. It was a big stressor, weighing heavy on my shoulders.
My dad and brothers had offered to help with the construction portion of the remodeling I had in mind, but I would still have to use a lot of my savings from the past few years to buy the materials. It would nearly wipe me out. It would mean staying with my parents a little longer than I had hoped before we could start to look for our own place, but I figured we could live with that. Not to mention, my mom would be over the moon at having her granddaughter under the same roof. But was I ultimately doing what was best for Remi? Because that was what really mattered in the long run.
Going home had made me think a lot about Remi’s future. Sure, she was young now, and I could keep her pretty safe and sheltered with Pam watching her, but what about when she started going to school? It was a big city, and the schools were big as well. What happened if she became a number and got lost in the crowd, falling behind in her learning? What happened if she didn’t have her chance to shine because her teachers were too busy trying to maintain a classroom with too many children, spreading their time with each student so very thin?
The thought of raising Remi in the same small town that I had been, felt comforting. It was nearly unheard of for crime to be in the news. Of course, a lot of people felt that was because the MC scared a lot of the troublemakers away. They kept their seedier businesses, like their strip club, out of town, leaving the garage and the lumberyard as their businesses in town. The lumberyard made a killing because they were the sole supplier to all the construction companies and contractors in the area. In fact, that would be where a lot of the materials I needed for the remodel would come from, with the exception of restaurant and bar-specific equipment that I would need to order from a special supplier.
And Colton. Colton was on my mind about every other second. That had to have been the most mind-blowing sex I had ever experienced. Jesus Martha. Talk about hot. I wasn’t sure what made that time better than all the rest, but it seemed like each time was better than the last with us. Which got me wondering… will there be another time? He had told me he loved me, but it was only that one time. And he was really quiet when I left. I wasn’t sure how to take that.
I called Pam to let her know where I was and approximately when I would be home. Dang, I sure would miss our visits when I stopped by to pick up Remi after work. She said she hadn’t seen Michael all weekend. Of course she hadn’t, probably because he was too busy stalking me back home. I was being careful on the trip and trying to be observant of headlights that seemed to follow me. So far, anytime I slowed down if I got nervous, the vehicles all just went around me. Thank God. I really didn’t believe he would mess with me again, but the experience had definitely made me more aware of my surroundings—something I should have done before. Hindsight really is 20/20.
I was getting pretty sleepy by the time I pulled into the parking garage back at my apartment, and I was actually looking forward to crawling in my bed—well, sofa—and getting some sleep before work tomorrow. Pam called as I was pulling my SUV in and parking. She was checking to see where I was because she was worried about me driving back so late and was relieved to hear I made it okay.
We continued to talk as I went upstairs after collecting my new key from my mailbox. I hung up with Pam, promising to go over to visit her after work tomorrow, and secured all of the locks on my door. Dropping my bag just inside the door, I hung up my keys and went to the bathroom. After I brushed my teeth and peed, I shuffled out to the living room, set the alarm on my phone, and crashed on the couch.
In the morning, I didn’t remember even falling asleep. I did, however, remember my dreams were once again plagued by a blue-eyed sex god, but this time they were so much more vivid and realistic…
THIS WAS MY SIXTH night having dinner with the raven-haired beauty sitting next to me. Sixth. Almost an entire week. I hadn’t missed a single day with her. After all, I had over two years of her life to make up for. I wasn’t missing another second that I didn’t have to. Stephanie’s parents had been great. They had her ready and waiting at 5:30 p.m. every day after I got off work. I would pick her up, and it would just be the two of us. Of course, she had asked where her mommy was about a hundred times, and that broke my fucking heart.
Tonight she had a little pink princess backpack on her back when I picked her up. She had stood at the top of the steps to the porch holding her grandpa’s hand, jumping up and down in excitement as I pulled up in my truck, complete with her hot pink and black car seat strapped in the back seat. I could not believe how happy this little girl made me. It was like her sunshine lit up all the fucking darkness in my head. When I was with her, I felt bright, happy, free… saved.
Tonight she was spending the night with me for the first time. I had finally made the decision to buy my own place. I was able to take quick possession because the house has been empty for months after the elderly owner had moved to Arizona. His kids didn’t want it and it had just been sitting there collecting dust. I had spent every lunch this week mowing the grass down, cleaning up inside, and picking up the bare necessities for furniture. I had become a right fucking Suzy Homemaker. Who would have thought? The guys gave me shit every day, and I just laughed. What the fuck could I say? They were right and I didn’t give a flying fuck. My life felt nearly perfect for the first time in years. It was like this little girl of mine had breathed new life into me. Now if I could just convince her momma to join us…
I helped Remi cut up her food and then handed her the fork, keeping the knife over by my side of the table. I was learning all the little things that parents did to keep their children safe, and it felt fucking amazing. She smiled at me as she sat on her knees and popped a bite in her mouth. She had insisted she didn’t need a booster seat ’cause she was a “big girl,” and hell if I was gonna tell my little princess she wasn’t. Shit, this little girl of mine already had me wrapped around her tiny finger, and she didn’t have a fucking clue. I laughed to myself.
My mind wandered off to her momma again. I had chosen the house on the edge of town with her in mind, but I hadn’t told anyone that. It was on the road out of town that ran down to t
he town square where the Oasis was located. It was also a little bit country, sitting on fifteen acres, so Stephanie would feel much like she had growing up. It would also allow Remi to have room to stretch her legs. I already had the guys lined up for tomorrow to help me install a fence along the perimeter and a solar-powered automatic gate across the driveway. I wasn’t taking chances with my little princess getting out on the small highway.
It felt good to finally put the money I had earned and stashed away for years to good use. I got a great deal on the house, and I planned on updating it while preserving some of the old farmhouse character. I was hoping Stephanie would help me make some of the choices for materials and colors. I was nervous as shit to ask her, but I really was hoping we could make a go of trying to be a family. I didn’t know where, exactly, our relationship would end up. What I did know was the sex was fucking incredible and I enjoyed being with her. She was sexy, smart, ambitious, loving, and a great mother. I could certainly do worse.
Remi and I finished our meals, and I paid the waitress. Funny how I noticed she was trying to flirt with me and coo at Remi, but my dick didn’t seem to give a shit, not even when she bent down to pass Remi’s plate over, giving me a clear and unobstructed view of her tits spilling out of her top. Hey, I didn’t say I never noticed. A man appreciates a nice-looking set of tits like a hot bike or a smoking car, but it doesn’t mean we want to own them all.
I gathered Remi up and loaded her in the truck, buckling her car seat like a pro now. Who would have thought Colton Alcott would get the hang of this dad stuff so easy? Not just get the hang of it, but love the hell out of it.
“You ready to go see Daddy’s new house, baby girl?” I wasn’t sure how much she understood of what I said, but she sure seemed to understand a lot. My girl was one helluva smart cookie.
“House!” Remi slapped her hands on the armrests of her car seat. I smiled and kissed her cheek.
As I started up my truck, Sixx AM’s “Life is Beautiful” blasted through the speakers. I looked in the rearview mirror at my daughter bopping her head to the music. Yes, yes, it most certainly was… and getting better every day.
MUCH TO EVERYONE AT the restaurant’s surprise and disappointment, I had turned in my notice. It was a sad moment for me as well, but I knew there were amazing things waiting on my horizon. I had been packing like a fiend all week too. Remi’s room was mostly packed—I hadn’t realized how much that little girl had! She had more clothes than I did! Sheesh!—and I was trying to go through her baby stuff to donate the items she had outgrown.
All of the stuff in the kitchen was packed. Well, all the stuff I wouldn’t use over the next week, anyway. I had left out a single place setting for myself, a couple of pans, a bowl, and a cup. There wasn’t much in the living room, and my brothers would help me with the big stuff like my couch and TV stand. I hadn’t really acquired a lot of furniture over the last few years, which would help make the move a little easier.
I sat down to watch a movie with a bowl of popcorn. It was Friday night and I was taking a break from packing to just relax and chill. My phone rang like clockwork at 8:30 p.m. Reaper would make a point to have Remi call me after he had her dropped off at my parents and she was ready for bed. I smiled as I picked it up and answered.
“Hi Mommy! Wemi go to bed. At Daddy’s house! Miss you, Mommy. Daddy talk. Nigh-night!” Those were the main points I caught of her conversation which was interspersed with nonsensical toddler babble. It was hard not to laugh when she was trying so hard to sound big. I heard a rustling and pattering feet along with a muffled “I’ll be there to tuck you in shortly, princess” before his deep, sexy voice came on the phone.
“Hey, baby. Everything okay with you? I guess you heard Remi is staying with me tonight? I really hope you don’t mind. I probably should have discussed it with you first. I didn’t really think about that until I had already spoken to your parents and made the plans.” He was rambling about as much as his daughter had, and I was pretty sure he was worried about my response. I wasn’t really sure how I felt. I hoped everyone would behave tonight, because I didn’t want my daughter exposed to the sort of things I saw on Sunday.
“Ummm, yeah. Are you sure it’s a good idea to have her there though? I don’t want that Gretchen bitch near her.” My hackles were rising. I didn’t even know that wench, but I sure as hell didn’t like the way she had tried to start trouble between us. I especially didn’t want to think about what he may have done with her before. That made me a little nauseous.
“Well, about that… We’re not at the clubhouse.”
“You’re not? Where are you then? Did you get a hotel?” Please, God, let him have her somewhere safe. Not that I didn’t trust him with her, but I knew he wasn’t used to making child-centered choices yet.
“No… I actually wanted it to be a surprise to you, but…” I heard a shuffling as he moved the phone around. “Well, I bought a house. I was hoping you would give me some feminine pointers on some of the decorating and remodeling. I wasn’t going to say anything until you came back. I guess I didn’t plan on Big-Mouth-Magee spilling the beans.” He gave a nervous laugh. “Are you mad? It’s clean, I promise.”
“I’m a little shocked, I guess. But, no, I’m not mad at all. I just didn’t expect you to leave the guys at the clubhouse. I thought you liked being close to them.” Absently, I flicked pieces of popcorn around the bowl. I missed Remi something fierce. It had pretty much been her and me against the world for the last couple of years, so I was a little jealous on top of missing her. I was also really missing her daddy, but I didn’t know if he wanted to hear that. I heard Remi holler “Daddy!” in the background.
“Baby, can I call you back? I want to talk to you, but our princess is waiting for me. I won’t be long.”
I agreed and ended the call. My head was spinning. Wow. He bought a house? Whoa. I was impressed and surprised. He really was taking his new daddy role seriously. I began to imagine what sort of house he would choose as I waited for him to call back. Probably something close to the shop and clubhouse in case he was needed. It would definitely need a garage big enough for his bike, and probably his truck. I hadn’t realized I had eaten the entire bowl of popcorn until I noticed I was pushing seeds around trying to find more popcorn. I got up and placed the bowl in the sink and refilled my water. I had just sat on the couch when my phone started to ring again.
“Hey you! That was quick,” I said without looking at the phone. The answer was silence. “Hello? Hellooooooo?” I looked at my phone, thinking he must have a bad signal and lost the call. Unknown caller. Weird. I rarely got those calls anymore. “Hello?” Nothing. So I hung up. Must have been a wrong number. I thought I heard my doorknob rattle then, but it must have been my imagination or someone bumped it as they carried stuff down the hall, because I never heard anything else after that.
It rang again and this time Colton Sex God popped up on my caller ID. I chuckled as I blushed, remembering entering him into my contacts like that after the birthday bash. I hadn’t thought to change it, but I probably should before he saw it. Talk about embarrassing. Lordy!
“Hello there, good looking,” I said in a sultry phone-sex-line voice, teasing him. I heard him chuckle and then groan softly.
“Shit, baby, don’t do that to me. We’re too far away for that shit, and I think my dick heard you. Thanks a lot.”
“You’re so crude,” I giggled, “and I like it.” I wiggled my eyebrows as if he could see me. Man, I’m such a dork. If he knew how many times I had touched myself imagining it was him, he would have a heyday with that. I felt my face flame with embarrassment and was glad he couldn’t see me.
“Baby, you haven’t seen crude. Facetime me and I’ll show you how crude I can be.” I could hear the lasciviousness and the smile in his voice. I also knew I looked like total crap right now and there was no way I was letting him see that!
“Uhhhhh, yeah, I don’t know if that would be a good idea. I look like po
op on a stick! And what if Remi woke up and caught you? Hmmmmmm, Daddy? How would that look, you naughty boy?” I teased him, hoping it would be enough to get him to drop the Facetime thoughts. He laughed.
“I love hearing you say that. I also love hearing you call me ‘Daddy.’” He laughed. “And okay, I’ll behave. But let me Facetime you. I need to see you. I don’t care what you look like, baby.” He was not going to let this drop, so I reluctantly agreed.
Seeing his gorgeous face pop onto my phone screen made my heart lurch. This man did something to me with that smile and those dimples. I wanted to reach through and mess up his dark hair and land kisses all over his face. I wanted to run my hands through the scruff along his jawline and across his cheeks. God, I knew I was smiling like a goof.
“There’s my gorgeous girl,” he said. “Man, I have missed you. Don’t get me wrong, I love having this time with Remi, and your family has been great about it, but I kinda like having your ass around too.” He winked and I laughed.
“We aren’t even really dating. We’re just co-parenting and getting to know each other. How can you miss me?” I laughed and tried to capture some of the stray hairs that insisted on escaping my messy bun, wishing I had put a little makeup on today. “Besides, I look awful, you don’t need to fib to make me feel better.”
His face turned serious, and I thought I had said something to piss him off.
Colton's Salvation: A Demented Sons MC Novel Page 18
