by Gina Drayer
“Free?” Dylon said with a mischievous grin. “Does that include the porn sites?”
“Ew,” Roxie said, tossing a towel at his head. “Only a perv would go to the library to look at porn.”
“I don’t think a library card will get you into premium porn sites,” Lee said. “But you might be surprised at what kinds of things you can find in books these days. Much better than internet porn.”
"Well then, have a good time,” Dylon said in a low voice. “With all those books.”
“I will.” Embarrassed, again, Lee headed for the door. But for some reason, she couldn’t let it end there. Pausing before going out the door, she turned around. “And Dylon, while I’m there, I promise to peruse a few dirty books just for you.”
“I can’t wait to hear a review of your findings.” His lips twitched upward in a slight grin, and he licked them as if he wanted to take a bite out of her. Had a man ever looked at her like that before? Lee couldn’t remember and thought she was going to melt right there on the spot.
Once outside, she leaned against the building, heart still racing. What had she been thinking? It was like teasing a hungry tiger. The tension between them was already stretched so tight it was just a matter of time before it snapped.
It was a good thing she had plans outside of her apartment for the day.
She still needed to connect with Janet. She should have done it days ago, but always found an excuse to postpone the call. Part of her couldn’t stand hearing bad news. And when it came to dealing with Christian and his trial, it had been so long since any of it had been good news. She’d stopped believing in the case after she had to go into hiding. The last few months had been an object lesson in disappointment.
Had it really been months?
It felt like a lifetime ago and a world away. And now she was reluctant to come out of her little cocoon, to step out of her Casa Bernadette, and talk to anyone from that old world.
But hiding her head in the sand just prolonged the agony. There was always the chance that things were back on track. And it was irresponsible to be out of contact for so long. After all the fuss Lee had made about being in danger, if Janet had tried to call, she might assume the worst.
The right thing to do was let the woman know she hadn’t fallen off the face of the earth yet.
While on the subway, she pulled her old phone out of her purse and put it back together. There were two voice messages. The first was from Janet wanting her to check in, but the second was from that same unknown number that had sent the text.
“Hello, Lee,” Christian's voice came over the speaker. “I’m glad you understood my last message, but I’m disappointed that you are still working with the DA’s office. I don’t think you realize who you’re dealing with. Haven’t you wondered why this case is taking so long? The men I worked for have a lot of power. They’re not concerned about you now, but if I told them what a nuisance you’ve become, there wouldn't be a hole anywhere on this planet you’d be able to hide in. And don’t think I didn’t notice that little transaction you made to your parents. I’d hate for anything to happen to that pretty little cottage they bought with their retirement money. Do everyone a favor and keep your mouth shut.”
Lee’s stomach was in knots. Christian had gone from veiled threats to blatant ones. She could easily turn this message over to Janet and have him tossed back into jail for threatening a witness, but he wasn’t the only person she had to worry about. Christian said the men he worked for weren’t interested in her, for now. But what would happen if she got him arrested again? Was Christian right? Would Del Rossi’s men come after her? Her family?
The safest thing she could do right now was just lay low until she found something in the paperwork. There had to be something that would link Christian to Del Rossi. Something other than her eyewitness testimony.
“So what was that about?” Roxie asked Dylon.
“What?” he asked, pulling his attention away from the closed door.
Lee had been flirting with him. That was new, and awkward, and cute as hell. She was terrible at it. For starters, that blush of hers made her look more “embarrassed school girl” than “flirty sex kitten.” And sexy books? He wanted to laugh. But he also wanted to toss her over his shoulder, caveman style, and drag her back to his bedroom.
“That whole weird sexual tension thing going on,” Roxie said, derailing his train of thought. “Are you sleeping with her?”
“I’m not sleeping with her,” he said and rolled his eyes at his sister.
It wasn’t a lie. He wasn’t sleeping with her yet. Dylon grabbed the ice bucket and went to the back, trying to decide if he really had a say in the matter anymore. Something had changed over the last few days. Since Lee had started doing the books, come to think of it. Whereas before, she’d always seemed out of place—a square cog in the clockworks—and now it was like she’d clicked into place. She was more relaxed and happier than he’d ever seen her. If it was possible, her newfound confidence made her even more attractive.
She was receptive to his flirting, and he was tired of fighting. Her proximity would make it easy. As long as he was very clear about things—
“Lee’s not like Claudia or any of the other women you parade through your bedroom,” Roxie said, coming up behind him. She’d followed him into the back to continue her interrogation. “You do realize that, don’t you? She’s the type of girl who thinks long-term. She’ll want commitment. Are you ready for that?”
The mention of commitment brought all thoughts of a fling to a screeching halt. It reminded him of the real reason Lee he hadn’t made a move yet. Roxie was right; she wasn’t his usual fun-time girl. But she also wasn’t the type that would settle for a bartender. Her stay here was temporary, by her own admission.
“I’m not stupid,” he said. “Why do you think I’m staying away from her?”
“You are stupid,” Roxie said. “The fact that Lee isn’t like those other women is a good thing. She’s smart, cute, and caring; not to mention, a hard worker. She clearly likes you, despite spending a great deal of time with you. Although that might be her biggest flaw. The point is, Lee’s exactly the kind of woman you should be going after.”
“I’m not looking to marry her,” he said, irritated with his sister.
“Idiot. I never said marry her, but if you’re going to try a real relationship, she’s perfect.”
“And she’s also got one foot out the door.” His mood had taken a turn for the worse, and he wanted this conversation with Roxie to end. “I don’t butt into your sex life or lack thereof. You need to stay out of mine.”
“Dylon,” Roxie said, softening her tone. “Lee isn’t Mom.”
He pulled away, hating that his sister knew all the triggers. “I never said she was.”
“You didn’t have to. I get it; you don’t do commitment because that’s safer. If nothing ever starts with a woman, then you can't be disappointed when they leave. But you’re missing out on so much by not letting anyone in.”
“Says the woman who hasn’t even been out on a date for years,” Dylon said under his breath.
“Not every woman is like Mom,” Roxie said. Either she didn’t hear his jab or decided not to take the bait.
“This has nothing to do with Mom. That was years ago.”
“Then why do you think she’s going to leave?”
“Because she said as much. I don’t know if you noticed, but this isn’t where Lee belongs. The job, the apartment, it’s all temporary until she fixes whatever problem brought her here.”
“Some sisterly advice,” Roxie said. “You need to give her a reason to stay. I’m going to open up.” With that, she turned and left him to his thoughts.
Was it as simple as that? Would Lee choose him and this life over whatever it was she’d left behind?
Somehow Dylon doubted it.
There was so much he didn’t know about Lee. Even now, she kept so much of herself closed off. Then there were
the bruises and the fact that she hardly left the building.
But her secrets weren’t the main thing that had him worried. He knew she had way more experience with financial things than she’d let on. And her non-work clothes screamed money. She wasn’t a waitress. She shouldn’t be working in a bar.
He didn’t have much to offer a woman like her. About all he had going for him was a neighborhood bar and a huge mortgage. What reason would she have to stay?
But despite everything, Dylon was beginning to think Lee might just be worth the risk.
Chapter Ten
On the day of Cash and Kim’s wedding, Bernadette’s was closed. As Cash’s best man, Dylon went to the ceremony at the church, while Lee and Abbie stayed behind to ensure that the party room was transformed into an intimate fantasy ballroom.
The upstairs event room was stylish and just as well decorated as the downstairs. The walls were lined with green leather booths that seated up to eight. Most of the extra tables in the middle of the room were removed to make space for a dance floor. But there was still plenty of seating for the hundred or so guests that were invited.
It didn’t take much work to transform the concert space into an appropriate wedding venue. Lee had covered the tables with white linens and topped them with candles and red flowers. The prior afternoon Roxie and Abbie had come over to help Lee string fairy lights across the whole space.
Lee had the regular staff ditch the retro clothing for white coats and silver trays. Michael even wore a tux to tend bar. Somehow, in two weeks, she’d managed to orchestrate the whole thing. Dylon would be able to enjoy the reception as a guest while she monitored the catering, keeping an eagle eye on the number of cases of booze and trays of food the caterers served. She was enjoying her role as the de facto business manager as much as Dylon was thrilled to be absolved of it. And while she really loved accounting, this proved that party planning could be a viable fallback career if she couldn’t find a job.
Despite the short timeframe, everything went off without a hitch. Some things were easy because of Dylon’s contacts. He’d talked his friend Lance’s band, Black Sparrow, into playing the reception. The rock music was a little untraditional, but it fit well with the crowd in attendance.
Lee was surprised when Cash and Kim to took the floor for their first dance; Lance ditched his drums for a cello, and his bandmates accompanied him on piano and violin. The bride and groom floated across the floor as Black Sparrow played a beautiful waltz.
“They are good,” she told Roxie. “I had no idea they had that kind of range.”
“They met in a chamber orchestra,” Roxie said happily. “They used to tour with a youth orchestra when they were kids until they found religion.”
“Religion?”
“The First Church of Rock and Roll. They don’t get to play the classical stuff much these days, so they liked the idea of doing this part.”
The crowd wasn’t huge, but it filled the room, making the reception more intimate. Kim glowed with pleasure. And even though she was technically working, Lee was enjoying herself. She’d planned everything, and there wasn’t much for her to do besides enjoy the music and the company.
After a few more songs, Dylon pulled Lee onto the dance floor. Trying not to let herself experience the thrill of being in his arms was a struggle. He was in grand form, happy for his friends and proud that Bernadette’s was providing such a great party.
“They look really happy,” Lee said when the passed the bridal table.
“They had their ups and downs before they got here,” he said.
“That’s normal. Isn’t it? Love isn’t a smooth path.”
“It was pretty rocky for a while. They broke up. I didn’t think they’d make it. It about ruined Cash.”
That surprised her. She looked over at the couple. It was obvious they were deeply in love. “He seems like such an upbeat guy.”
“He usually is. When he thought he’d lost her completely, it hit him hard.”
“But they managed to fix things,” she said watching the happy couple. Lee couldn’t imagine them apart.
“Eventually. They had some differences when they first met. But they did manage to work things out and then built on that. I never knew what happened exactly and didn’t really want to know. That’s their story. I’m just happy for them.”
As he talked, she rested her head on his shoulder, swept up in the way he swirled her on the dance floor. She couldn’t help but be entranced. It had been a long time since she’d been held. It was more intoxicating than the champagne. And more dangerous.
“I don’t know if that’s a happy story or a sad one,” she told him.
“Probably some of each. The best stories have to have a little of both. At least the honest ones do.”
“You think so?”
“Sure. Fairy tales lose their appeal if you only get the happy ever after. It’s the fight that makes the story worthwhile.”
She laughed. “So now that they’ve fought their battles, they get their ending—happy ever after.”
He nodded. “That’s why people have weddings, isn’t it? Hell, if we didn’t believe in the possibility of being happy ever after, no one would get up in the morning, much less get married. Life is hard enough. You’ve got to believe in those happy endings. Even if so many never get one.”
“That’s pretty philosophical, Mr. Knightly. A bit depressing, but philosophical.”
“I have my moments. Even mixologists stray into abstract thought now and again.”
“So are you looking for your happily ever after?”
“No.”
It was a simple, flat statement. And something about the way he said it made her heart ache. Lee wanted to probe more, but she got the impression she wouldn’t like his answers.
Later she danced with Cash, and he whirled her around the floor with surprising grace.
“Congratulations. You both look so happy,” she said.
“Out of my mind. It’s exotic and heady, this love shit.”
“You’re such a romantic.”
He winked. “Speaking of romance, I assume you know that Dylon is nuts about you.”
“Now I know you’ve had too much to drink,” she said. “Dylon flirts with anything with a pulse.”
“I may have had a little,” he said with a sheepish grin. “But I’m not blind. I’ve seen you two together.”
“So you think your friend sees me as his next conquest?”
“No. Not that at all,” Cash said, shaking his head. “If that was all it was, I wouldn’t be worried.” The smile fell and his expression turned pensive. “Look, I know he is a skirt chaser, but for once, I think he is after an entire woman.”
Her heart skipped a beat at his words. This was a complication she didn’t need, no matter what her crazy heart thought.
“Well, I think you’re wrong,” she said in flat denial. “I doubt that he is interested in me at all. I’m just an employee, like Abbie or Sarah or Michael.”
“You’re not just an employee,” Cash said with a chuckle. “He talks about you.”
“And?” she said, unimpressed. “I’d assume he talks about women all the time.”
“Dylon never talks about women, not even his employees. But he talks about you.”
She smiled, realizing what was going on. It was a wedding, after all.
“Did Dylon ask you to put in a word for him? Does he think a neutral, supposedly impartial appeal will get me into his bed tonight?”
Cash frowned and shook his head. “I meant what I said. If Dylon was trying to bed you, you’d either have slapped him or screwed him already, quite possibly both. The truth is, he would be pissed to know I was talking to you. He might be a very social guy, but in many ways, he’s a private person. The very fact that he’s let you into his life is surprising.”
“I’m just helping him out with the business. That’s not exactly inviting me into his life.”
Cash looked at her oddl
y as the song ended. “I never thought I’d ever say this to a woman—hell, I never thought I’d have to—but I’m going to ask a favor. Please don’t break Dylon’s heart. I don’t think he could bear it.”
The groom left Lee on the edge of the dance floor to join his beautiful bride. And even though the dance had ended, Lee felt like the room was still spinning. She knew Dylon was attracted to her, but never imagined he might feel anything beyond that.
She needed some air. The reception had gone off without a hitch, and there really wasn’t a need for her to stay, so she slipped out the side door and up to her apartment. The sound vibrated through the floors as Black Sparrow shifted into rock mode.
She felt sick, but it was the sickness of uncertainty that played out over the music from the reception she’d escaped. She couldn’t escape her feelings.
Ever since she’d danced with Dylon, her body had begun betraying her resolve. The closeness of dancing, feeling his warmth, his gentle strength, had been somewhat unnerving. She wanted to dance with him, but it was supposed to be lighthearted, carefree, not serious.
Then Cash had to get involved. It was easy to dismiss her feelings when she thought Dylon was just after sex. It was fine that he aroused her sexually. Even with his tattoos and macho manner he was desirable, but that didn’t mean love.
That word again, that goddamn scary word: love. He’d said it casually that night when she began doing the books, and it lingered between them. Sometimes she’d catch a glimpse of him in the bar, and his deep voice would toss out that word in a casual context, and her entire body would quiver.
“This is a bad decision,” she told herself. “Your life is complicated enough already.”
Worried that she was going crazy, talking to herself, she decided to take a shower and see if she could sleep. She slipped off her dress, a carryover from her old life, and hung it carefully in the closet.
“If he cares about you, it’s even more reason to stay away,” she said aloud, hoping her brain would get the message. “You’d be putting him in danger.”
