by Lauren Wood
“How’d it go?”
“Good, but let’s keep our eyes peeled for a tail, yeah?”
“You got it boss.”
Danielle
“You’ve got to be crazy if you think that I’m going to that thing tonight. You wouldn’t catch me dead at one of those.”
Mariss didn’t get it and she was not going without me, so she told me that I was going to have to give her a better reason than that.
“And why is that? Isn’t there anyone there that you wonder about? I mean, gosh it’s been ten years. I would like to see how everyone is doing and I hope that Mindy and her band of rejects are all fat and divorced.”
“You don’t want to bring that karma down on you. What if they look amazing?”
Mariss agreed. Her thin face wasn’t smiling when she thought of that. I knew that she’d gotten the invitation a month ago and was just now mentioning it. She knew that I didn’t want to go, but I also knew that she’d been eating carrot sticks and celery for a month in preparation. I didn’t want to go, but I knew that I would for her. I was just going to give her a hard time about it because it was so damn fun and I was still a little reluctant to go to such an event.
“They won’t. I’ve been doing a little recon.”
I rolled my eyes at her and told her that she was taking it far too seriously. “High school only matters when you are going through it. At the end of the day, it’s just a few years before your real life begins.”
“Can you not philosophize this? I want to have fun, wear a pretty dress, drink some free booze and check out some of the guys I used to date and see how they are doing. Don’t you want to see anyone again? I know that you and Mack were hot and heavy a long time ago. Don’t you wonder what ever happened to him after graduation?”
I hadn’t thought about Mack in a long time. A very long time. He was the man I dated my senior year of high school, but as the year neared its end, it was clear that we weren’t going to make it past graduation. I’d broken up with him because it seemed like the best thing to do at the time. I wanted to leave it copasetic, but he hadn’t taken it so well when it came down to it. There had been a fight and a lot of things had been said. The last thing I’d said to him was that I hoped I never saw him again. For ten years that had been true and I hadn’t.
“Not really. Besides, I doubt he will even be there. You know that he was never one to go to those kinds of functions. He was always too cool for all of that. The way he was getting in trouble back then, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was in jail or something by now. I mean can you imagine what Mack is into now? It’d probably something illegal. I don’t think he will even be there, so that’s not even an option.”
My friend and roommate grinned and pushed her black hair back off of her face. “It’s good to know that you haven’t thought about him at all.”
I shut my mouth because I didn’t want to say anymore. It would have been a lie to say that I hadn’t thought about him through the years. I’d learned after we broke up that whatever had been between us was something special. It wasn’t like anything else that I had encountered with any other man. There had always been something about Mack and now that I was in the real world and had been dating for a decade, I knew that I was most likely never going to find a man to please me like he had again. That was a hard thing to grasp and accept, but he wouldn’t be at the reunion, so it wasn’t even worth thinking about.
“I have through the years, but it doesn’t do me any good. I wouldn’t know what to say to Mack if I saw him again. I can’t imagine that we would have anything in common and he probably got married and had kids. He was more into that sort of thing that you would have thought. He was a tough guy in front of everyone, but we used to sit up for hours talking about our life together after graduation and he’d wanted all of those things. I can’t see anything good coming from going to that reunion or seeing Mack again. What if he brought his wife?”
“If you didn’t care, it wouldn’t matter.”
Mariss had me there, but I wasn’t going to give it to her. I knew that if she was encouraged, it just made it worse. I first saw that invitation in the mail and my mind had played through all of the scenarios that I could come up with if I went and saw Mack. The one I liked least was where he was married and had a beautiful wife. Or that he wouldn’t even remember me. I hated the idea that he still occupied a place in my mind and I may not in his.
“Do you really want to go?”
Mariss nodded her head and clasped her hands together like she was begging. I made a sound of aggravation and she took it as it was my way of giving in. It really was and it was then that I realized again that Mariss knew me too damn well.
“Yes and you do too, even if you don’t know it yet. It’s going to be fun and we could both use a night out. I mean, when was the last time that we went out instead of staying in and grading papers?”
She had a point and I agreed finally. Mariss had been hinting at going for days, but now was the night and she’d been on me about it since school let out and we drove back to the house that we shared. It was my turn to drive and though we were late this morning, I should have known that there was a reason that Mariss wasn’t upset about it. I should have known that it was going to be leverage for later.
“Fine Mariss, we will go. But I think you’re expecting far more than you’re going to get. You were about the only thing I wanted to take with me out of high school. Everyone else I could give or take. I don’t know why it would change ten years later.”
“It’s a nostalgia thing I guess. I don’t know why, but I want to go. I guess I am just interested how everyone turned out. I know that it’s weird and we’ll never see them again after tonight, but I think it would be nice.”
“No more reason to explain it. I’ve already agreed. I will go get dressed. Give me five minutes.”
“Take ten and put something cute on. A little war paint wouldn’t hurt”
I didn’t comment back to her because we were in perpetual argument about clothes. She liked to wear clothes that were not very elusive to what they hid beneath them and I preferred not to dress like that. I was twenty eight years old and so was Mariss. She needed to remember that sometimes. The dress she was wearing now was too short and tight, but I wasn’t going to be the one to rain on her parade. She knew what it looked like and didn’t care. Mariss was thin and beautiful and still figured that she could wear whatever she wanted. Since everything looked good on her, I was of that ilk to think that as well.
But I was a different issue altogether and I had filled out in the last ten years. My tits got bigger, hips got wider and the dresses in those stores at the mall didn’t fit right anymore.
I sighed at the closet as I looked at all of the things that were hung up. I was in the back of it, way in the back with things that I hadn’t seen in years. There was this one little red dress that I’d bought as a fluke and now I finally had a place to wear it. If I did by chance run into Mack, I wanted to be wearing something pretty and sexy like this. Why else would I go to this thing? I wasn’t thinking about him, but just in case.
Danielle
“Is this too much? I feel like this is too much.”
I felt strange to look like this. I was an elementary teacher for goodness sakes and I felt like a painted whore. It was the only term that I could think of when I looked in the mirror. Mariss had done my makeup and she was exclaiming how good I looked but I didn’t see it and I certainly didn’t feel it. She’d even put fake eye lashes on me, something I’d never worn before and it was all too much. The weight of the eyelashes was making it hard to see and it was becoming clear that this wasn’t going to work.
“No, it’s perfect Danielle. You have to chill out Danny. You never wear makeup, but it looks good.”
I looked back at the reflection in the mirror. The makeup made my hair look blonder if that was possible and there was a part of me that did like it. I didn’t look like myself and I guess that’s what I w
as going for. I didn’t want to look like the schoolmarm. Not if I ran into Mack. I wanted him to remember me as the sexy woman that I was. I didn’t want to get back with him, but if he was attracted to me after all of this time, I would take it as an ego boost and spend the next ten years with less on my shoulders. If his wife was uglier than me, well that wouldn’t be so bad either.
“Are you sure? I feel like, I don’t know.”
“It’s fine. I mean this isn’t a look that you’d wear to work, but for tonight it’s perfect. I don’t know why you don’t dress up more. You’re hot and you should flaunt it. Hell, I know that I would if I looked like you.”
I ignored her comments and took one last look in the mirror before I walked away. I didn’t want to think about it and it was going to have to do because it was time to go or we were going to be late. Since she was such a stickler for that and had been looking at the clock several times in the last few minutes, I figured it was time to go. It was as good as it was going to get apparently.
“Let’s get out of here then and see what this night is going to be like.”
She told me to stop being so pessimistic and I told her that I was going to try. All of this talk of Mack had him in the forefront of my mind and I knew that he was pretty much the only one that I really wanted to see. It would nice to catch up with everyone and to get to know the new people and how they turned out, but at the end of the day it was Mack that I wondered about. No one else really got into the equation, but he had always been different.
Mariss was driving and I was glad for that because my mind went to scenes from the past. Mack had been my first in so many ways. He was my first in bed, first in love, first to break my heart. Or I broke his heart. However it could be seen, my heart broke in the process as well, but we were two very different people. I wanted to go to college and he wanted to hang around and see what happened. It wasn’t a good enough plan for me. I knew that I wanted to be in education and a degree was needed to do so. I could have gone to school closer, but for some reason, I chose to get out of the area.
Maybe I wanted him to tell me to stay, offer to go with, but that wasn’t how it had happened. Instead I left and I had never seen him again or heard much of anything about him. My curiosity was up. It wouldn’t have taken Mariss too much to have convinced me to go. Secretly my curiosity was way up and I just wanted to know.
“What are you thinking about Danny? You’re so quiet.”
“I’m just thinking about high school and how I thought it was never going to end. It was really long and exhausting. All of the clicks and mean girls to deal with was a lot back then. I don’t know. I’m just feeling weird.”
“You’re not thinking about any guys in particular? You know, six foot three, strong build, dark blue eyes and blonde hair that looks about like the color of the sun?”
I laughed at her question and I knew that she was talking about Mack. It also reminded me that she’d had a crush on him all that time ago. We’d gotten into a fight and didn’t talk for a month over him and I knew that I was still just as opposed to the two of them going out. I cut her a look and she tried to look innocent.
“What, you have to admit he did have great hair.”
I knew that he did because I used to run my hand through it all the time. It was silky smooth and he had kept it so shiny that it almost glowed in some lights. It was a distinguished part of him and I did remember it well.
“Yeah he did have great hair and great abs. There is a lot that I miss about him; I’m not going to lie. But I don’t even think he will be there and if he was, I don’t even know what it is that I would say to him. What would you say to him?”
“If it was me Danny, you know that I wouldn’t say much of anything.”
I rolled my eyes, but it was about the answer that I would have expected from her. She was always into the physical side of a relationship and I swear that she was more like a stereotypical guy than most guys. I was different, but when it came to thoughts of my time with Mack, it was where my mind went as well.
“You can’t just go up to a guy after ten years and bang him.”
She laughed at my choice of words. “I don’t think I’ve heard that expression in years. God, see, we are already feeling like we did back in the day.”
I just sighed and tried not to think about it all that much. I was getting nervous and talking about it wasn’t helping. It usually did. We would make light out of a problem and it wouldn’t seem like such a problem.
“What if he is there and married to some hot model, rich and I threw it all away. The best sex of my life and it was all for a crappy forty thousand a year job teaching kids that don’t really want to learn?”
She got serious for a moment and I was happy that Mariss wasn’t going to make light of this. I was freaking out inside.
“It’s going to be fine Danny. If he is there, big if, he will see that he was a fool for letting you go off to college and not following you. That’s what he’ll learn and nothing more. I hope that he’s miserable and got fat.”
“Don’t wish that.”
She told me that I knew that’s what I wanted, but it wasn’t. When I thought of Mack, I wasn’t sure what I wanted. Not in the least bit.
Mack
“Denise, I don’t have all night. I told you that I wanted to get going, so come on or I am leaving you here.”
“I will just be another minute.”
“That’s what you said last time. Get your ass out here or I’m leaving without you.”
She huffed and I saw her head pop out of the bathroom. “I’m not finished yet.”
“You look good enough. Who are you trying to impress?”
“No one. I just want to look good for you.”
“You do. Let’s go.”
She made a few frumping sounds and I had a feeling that she was going to be pouting on the way over. I was rethinking taking her to begin with. Maybe I should have just gone solo. I hadn’t because I wanted to come with a certain look about me. That meant that I had to have a hot woman on my arm and Denise was free. She was one of many, but she was also one of the hotter ones that did like to flaunt it. The flaunting I didn’t mind because it would just make me look better.
Back in school I was a troublemaker and some would most likely say I was still one. I didn’t care, mind you, but it would be good to show up and let every asshole in there know that I had made it. High school hadn’t been my favorite time, but there were parts of it that I remembered fondly. There were a few people that I remembered even fonder and I was looking forward to finding out how they were. There was one in particular I wanted to see and I hoped she made it there.
“I’m leaving, screw this shit. You can only put so much damn paint on before become a damn Picasso.”
Denise got out of the bathroom and gave me a dirty look. I was going to have to do something to make her feel a little better in the car. I didn’t want her going in with that scowl on her face. That sort of expression didn’t exude what I wanted it to.
“You going to pout all night?”
“Maybe.”
We got in the car and I told the driver where we were going. He took the address and put it into his GPS before taking off towards the destination. We had a little bit of a trip and since she was being this way, I knew I was going to have to take care of her to get her in a better mood.
“Come here Denise.”
Her eyes went to mine and there wasn’t just the look of anger that she’d had before. There was something else in her eyes now and I could have sworn that it was desire. It was like a light switch and I smiled back at her. I would have that beautiful smile back on her face soon enough. I always did.
The driver pulled up at the front of my old high school and I had a moment of nostalgia that came over me. It had been a while since I’d been back here and I now saw it in a different light. It had been the center of my universe so long ago, but things had changed and so had my world. My world had gotten a lot
bigger and now I wondered how I had been contained for so long here.
“So this is where you went to school, huh?”
I didn’t answer her question because it didn’t need an answer. Denise was good for many things, but conversation was not really one of them. I didn’t want to have to mingle with her all night. She was really just for getting in the door. I was going to have my eyes open for someone in particular and if Danny did happen to make it here, I was going to be talking to her and catching up. I wanted her to be hot and single, at least single enough for a little fun for old time’s sake.
We made it through the door and I smiled back at Denise. She was already getting plenty of looks and I was glad that I’d brought her. She was making me look good and I didn’t have to do anything at all.
“Name?”
It was Betty Johnson sitting down at the table with one of her little groupies from school. She didn’t even look up at me, but I didn’t mind. She hadn’t aged well and she had always been too good to talk to guys like me. She liked her men older and rich. Now that I was both, I wouldn’t have given her the time of day. I tried not to take the snub personally, but I wasn’t used to people not knowing who I was. I’d made a name for myself in certain circles.
“Mack Stevens.”
She looked up then from the deep timber of my voice and I saw the appreciative look that I got now. She wasn’t like most women though. Betty wasn’t worried about my hard arms and wide chest. No, she was checking out my watch and shoes. She wasn’t worried about physical attributes, but the contributions that I could make to her bottom line. She was a gold-digger in the very sense of the word and I could have seen her coming a mile away. I knew her type all too well.
“Wow, you look a lot different Mack. You clean up nice.”
