by Reed, Sophia
“Okay.”
“Okay, what?”
“Okay, calm down. You’re right.” I was surprised to hear the words come out of his mouth. “You’re right. I was out of line, and I caused issues I shouldn’t have caused. Believe me, I slept on the couch last night because of it. Molly said it, too. I’m tearing us up.” I remembered Molly standing in total shock as Luca screamed at her that he could do whatever he wanted. I didn’t really know how to respond to his reaction. It was like he had two personalities, and he wasn’t able to navigate when to pull each one out. “This isn’t good, Sandro. This isn’t good for any of us.”
“What are you saying?” I asked.
“I don’t know. I have to figure it out. Can you come home?” he asked.
“No, I can’t today. I need to be with Willow.” It was strange being so blunt. I imagined if Willow had heard me say it, she’d be over the moon. “I have a feeling that I don’t have much time with her left, and I need to make the most of it.”
Luca was quiet for a moment, and even in the silence, I could tell that he was battling with which personality to toss out. “Okay,” he replied. “I understand. Be with Willow. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Yeah. Hey, Luca?”
“Yeah?”
“I have information about Horatio. I’m still working, and I know you are, too. Nothing’s gonna happen today. Be with your wife, and be with your kids. We’ll figure it out tomorrow. Marco’s a big boy. He can take care of himself in an emergency, and Ricky’s checking in on him hourly. Let’s take a day off.”
There was a sigh and then, “Yeah. I think I’ll do that. Thanks. See you tomorrow.”
“Yeah. Bye.”
I hung up the phone and stared at the blank screen like it was going to give me answers. I never knew what the next day was going to bring me. I hated it.
I walked over to the hotel coffee shop, despite only being in pants and shoes, and knocked on the frame, drawing the attention of the barista. “Hey, I know no shirt, no shoes, and all that. If I stand out here, can I order a couple of cups of coffee?”
She grinned broadly at me, her peach cheeks developing some color. “You can come in.”
“Thanks.” I stepped into the shop and walked over to the counter. “Nothing complicated, just two large cups of coffee and…” I peeked into the small display case of baked goods. “A couple of banana nut muffins, please.”
“Of course.” She sprang into action filling two cups with coffee and setting two muffins into a bag. She took another bag and dropped in a collection of cream cups and sugar packets along with a couple of stir sticks and slid everything across the counter at me. “On the house.”
“Oh, no, I can pay.” I reached for my pocket, but the barista pushed the items further toward me, pointing out the post-it note with her number on it.
“Really. It’s okay.” She winked at me, and I grinned.
Who says male boobs don’t get free drinks?
“Thank you.” I took the two bags and the cups of coffee and made my way out of the shop. As I was turning the corner to head back up to our room, I flicked the post-it note off into the trash.
I’m sure you’re very nice, Callista, but I’m not interested. Willow would kill you.
I chuckled to myself, remembering a time back in high school when Willow found out one of the girls at our school was trying to get me to break up with her. For as much as she rejected the life, she’d be good at it. She could be ruthless when it came to anyone trying to interfere with our relationship. The girl spread a rumor that Willow was cheating on me. I didn’t believe it for a second. I knew Willow would never do something like that. Besides, we’d spent every waking moment together, so she wouldn’t have had the ability to sneak around. I was ignoring it and told Willow so, but she discovered that the person who’d started the rumors did so with the hope that I would take it for face value and break up with Willow, leaving me open to date her. Not that I would have, anyway. She didn’t hold a candle to Willow.
The next day, Willow walked into the school, walked directly up to her, tapped her on her shoulder, and clocked her in the face. When the girl started to cry, she said in an even tone, “I guess you were prepared to open your whore mouth, but not to have me close it.” If I could go back in time to any moment, it would be that one, so I could record it. We dated back before viral internet was much of a thing, but Willow would definitely be a meme right now if it had been.
There was a small balancing act getting the door open with the coffee and muffins in hand, but I managed okay. The sun was well above the horizon now, shining into the room. I rounded the corner, and Willow was sitting up in the bed, crossed legged, with her computer in her lap. When the door snapped shut, she looked up and smiled.
“Hey.”
“Hey, yourself.” I carried the coffees over to her, and she took them out of my hand and set the bag of muffins next to her on the bed. I took a quick kiss from her and then walked over to the other side of the bed to climb back in. “Let’s just stay in bed today.”
Willow handed one of the coffee cups to me. “Yeah, like your brother would ever go for that.”
“He doesn’t have a choice. I told him to leave me alone. I’m spending the day with you, and I’ll be home tomorrow.” I felt Willow’s gaze settle on me. I glanced over. “What?”
“You told him that, really?” she asked, her voice spiked.
“Yeah. I just chewed him out for the way he acted yesterday and told him I’d be home tomorrow.”
A grin started small on Willow’s face but grew until it was a blinding smile. “Thank you.”
It was the first time I’d chosen her over them. “No, thank you.”
She closed her laptop and set it on the floor. “Well, if you’re not working, I’m not either.”
Even though I could probably have sex with Willow every second of every day, I enjoyed lounging around with her as the morning carried on into the afternoon. We found some shitty reality television to watch and make fun of. It was amusing to see what some people considered to be problems. We enjoyed a couple of the latest blockbuster movies that Willow was shocked I hadn’t seen. In my life, I didn’t often have time to go and catch a movie. One of the ones we watched starred her friend Sasha from back in California, which kickstarted a strung together list of stories about their friendship, to which I gave all my attention, if not because it was nice to hear what Willow had been up to in the six years since I’d seen her because she got this wry wrinkle to her nose whenever she spoke passionately.
Of course, sex was something that happened naturally. I would have been fine lying there all day with her, but as our fourth movie dragged on, Willow’s hand whispered down my chest and over my stomach to massage my groin. Her skilled fingers undid the button and zipper before dipping inside to pull at my anxious length. She sunk her head down and found me beneath the sea of blankets and pants, though its standing firm at attention made it pretty easy to find.
She tasted me, timidly at first, with growing confidence each time I let a groan tumble across my lips. She’d never sucked me when we were together back in high school. I desired it, certainly, but she was so precious in my eyes that I didn’t think I should ask it. She’d told me she hadn’t been with anyone other than me, so I had to wonder where she developed the skills that had her tongue flattening and molding itself to my shape, while the back of her throat contracted and released around my head, sending stabs of pleasure ping-ponging all around me. It wasn’t until I warned that I was close that she climbed on top of me and pulled me into her.
I held onto her waist as she rode me in slow, lazy movements, like molasses out of a tapped tree. We breathed in each other until we were colliding against orgasms, moaning and breathless. I didn’t even remember falling asleep, but I woke up sometime later with Willow still lying on top of me.
I rolled her over to her side, used a wet cloth from the bathroom to clean us up, and then climbed back under the
covers and pulled her close to me. She stirred while I drew her close, and she looked up at me through those captivating blue eyes, and my whole body shook.
I loved her so much more than I thought possible.
“Hey, can I ask you a question?” I asked.
“Sure,” she replied.
“When are you going back to California?” The thought made me ache. I didn’t want her to go.
She didn’t respond right away, and I didn’t rush it. However long it took her to answer, or even if she didn’t answer at all, I didn’t care.
“Do you want me to go back?” she asked, and I scoffed.
“No. I don’t even have to think about it. If I had my way, you’d never go back, I’d have you with me all the time. I’ve told you many times before, but allow me to say it again. I love you, Willow Morietti. When you finally let me show you my feelings, it was like it hadn’t been six years since I’d been with you last, but only six seconds We’d just pressed pause, and I was so happy you let me press play again.”
Willow went quiet again, and once again, I didn’t pressure her for any response. She’d admitted in passing to Ricky that she still had feelings for me, and I had to think that she wouldn’t have done all the things we’d done for the past few weeks if she didn’t feel something for me, but she hadn’t reciprocated love yet. Would it be nice to hear? Of course, but it wasn’t necessary. I could settle for feeling her love. I didn’t need to hear it.
Finally, she took my face in her hands. “Look. I’m not going to make you any promises, because I honestly don’t think I know much about what will happen to me anymore. I can’t promise forever. I can’t promise success, but for now, I’ll stay in Philly. I can work from anywhere, and when I desperately need to be somewhere else, I can fly out for a couple of days and come back.”
Elation was flooding into me by the gallon as she spoke, but I stayed quiet and listened.
“I won’t ever be okay with what you do. I don’t have anything against your family. In fact, I consider them my family, too, but I just have a fundamental issue with that life. I don’t want to hear about it. I’m trusting you not to land yourself in a position like either of our fathers. I want to be with you. I don’t know how long it’ll last, but I’m okay with taking every day as it comes.” She kissed me softly. “I love you, Alessandro.”
19
Willow
In the wake of everything that had taken place with Alessandro and his brother, and amidst their hunt for the people who threatened Marco, I decided it was in my best interest to go back to stay with my mom. To my surprise, my mom was actually really happy to hear I was staying for a while and would be staying with her. She told me that she wanted to do all sorts of mother-daughter stuff, and her back was to Ricky when she said it, so he caught the wind and bolted. I made sure to text him a big fuck you as soon as I could.
I couldn’t make heads or tails of her sudden desire to spend time together. The day after I came back from staying in the beautiful hotel with Alessandro, she decided that she wanted to start a garden. It was something that she enjoyed doing before money became the center of her world, and I didn’t want to discourage any part of her that might be getting back to normal, so I agreed to help her. She used to let me help her with her gardening when I was a little girl, so there was a small sliver of me that was excited to get to relive that joy.
We headed to a nursery in downtown Philly. If we went early in the morning, it was easier to get some rare and exciting plants. We bought a whole car-load of flowers, vegetables, fruits, and some small shrubs for decoration, plus several bags of the best kind of mulch and soil. After that, we headed to a home improvement store for plywood and paint. We found a good spot in the expanse of the estate’s backyard. We sanded and stained the plywood and then painted it in a deep, burgundy color. We took a break for tea and finger sandwiches while we waited for the wood to dry.
“So, it looks like you’re seeing Alessandro again,” she commented after a while. “How’s that going? I always thought you two were really great together.”
She thought I was going to have a casual, romantic-life conversation with her when I didn’t even do that when I was a teenager? “Yeah. Um, it’s interesting. I mean. I don’t think I ever got over him, so when he asked me out, I had a weak moment.”
“I’ll admit, I was surprised to hear from Ricky that you were still here when I called to check in last week. To be honest, and I’m sorry because this is going to sound so horrible, but I was kind of hoping you’d be gone already.” She looked at me like she was afraid I might throw my tea in her face.
It was painful to hear, but not shocking. “I guess I might have expected as much.”
“Don’t get me wrong, Willow. I’ve missed you very much. Every single day since you left for school. But, you remind me of—I don’t know—who I could have been?” She sighed, looking out over the plain, verdant lawn with only our budding garden in the expanse. “You know, when you told Alessandro that it was either you or the business, I really admired that.”
I let out a light gasp. “Um. Really?”
She nodded, her aging face a reflection of my own. “Yep. I remember when your father came home and told me that he was going to start working for the Varassos. I was mortified. I knew what they were about, and I couldn’t imagine being married to someone who did that. I had you kids, and all I could think was, ‘What if something happens to them?’” She took a bite of her sandwich for comfort. “We were so dirt poor at the time, and you and Ricky were sharing a PB&J with the last two pieces of bread we had, and I had no idea how we’d afford another loaf. Your dad, he pulled out this wad of cash and dropped it on the table in front of me. I was conflicted. It was either tell him no and continue to struggle, or risk it and give you guys the life you deserved.”
A warm grin wrapped spread over her face. “I still remember the day we moved into this house. You and Ricky couldn’t believe that you got to have your own rooms, but that first night you were supposed to sleep apart, you snuck out of your bedrooms at the same time to find each other. You argued over whose bedroom to sleep in, and ended up falling asleep in the hallway.”
My mom had never told me that story before, and I imagined she hadn’t told Ricky, either. “Wow.”
“I looked down at you two, huddled together under one tiny blanket, sleeping as hard as if you were in a four-poster bed, and realized I had made a terrible mistake. Without knowing what you were doing, you two proved that as long as we were together, struggling was better than sacrificing what we knew was right.” She was staring off into space, and I knew that she was twenty years younger and standing in that hallway. “It was too late, by then. Angelo always used to say—”
“Once you’re in, you don’t get out.” I recited the former Varasso patriarch’s mantra. “Yeah.”
“I told your father we’d made a mistake, and he screamed at me for the first time in our entire relationship. He said that it was too late, and we’d already sold ourselves. That was the day I knew your father was gone. I could have made the right decision and not lost him as much as I did when I decided taking the Varassos money was worth it.” She turned and smiled at me. “I guess I’ve always kind of considered Alessandro the one good thing that came out of that.”
I was struggling to fight back tears as my mom spoke. “Sandro?”
“He loves you so much. I’ve believed for a long time that I ruined you kids’ lives. You turned out okay, but your dad was in prison, and your mother, well…” She gestured to herself. “But when Alessandro started coming around, and I saw the smile on your face, it made me feel like God was giving you back a little bit of what I’d stolen from you. I guess this is my weird way of saying I really like him.”
“Yeah,” the word came out as an airy curiosity. “I don’t know what to say.”
She shook her head. “You don’t have to say anything, sweetheart. You’ve had to fill in the gap I’ve left for too long. Just prom
ise me you’ll never compromise yourself. If you feel it in your gut and in your heart, follow it.”
The conversation was as unexpected as the entire rest of my time in Philly had been. I never quite understood what my parents’ motivation was for getting us into this lifestyle. She’d never mentioned that we used to be poor, certainly not so poor that she didn’t know how we would afford a single loaf of bread. My dad probably felt that pressure as well. It made sense that after all of that, my dad would do anything to protect the people who, in his mind, saved his family. It also explained why my mom became obsessed with money. Had my mom been the best parent in the world? Maybe not, but had she made an honest mistake while trying to make sure we were well cared for?
I wanted black and white, but I only ever got shades of gray.
We shook off all the awkwardness and finished putting together out planters. We layered in nutrient-rich soil and some of the plant food and placed in all of our plants, and watered them, complete with spraying each other playfully.
“Well, this looks like a good time!” My mom and I stopped and looked over, and Molly, of all people, was making her way across the yard. “Sorry, I knocked, but no one answered, and the door was unlocked.”
“Hey, Molly,” my mom greeted.
“Hey, Mrs. Morietti! How was Cabo?”
My mom fanned out her arms. “I certainly got my tan.”
“You sure did.” She walked over to us and then looked at me. “Hey, uh. Are you busy? I mean, busier than this?”
I chuckled. “No. Why? What’s up?”
“Luca feels really terrible about the way he behaved the other day,” Molly explained. “To make it up to you and Alessandro, we’re having a bonfire in the garden. No work, no hot tempers. Just smores, music, and fun. Alessandro will be there, of course, but it’s a surprise. He doesn’t know you’re gonna be there.”
