Waldo

by Robert A. Heinlein

  He cautioned himself not to consider his tentative hypothe­sis of the Other World as proved; nevertheless, it was an ade­quate hypothesis even if it should develop that it did not apply to some of the cases of strange events

  The Other Space might have different physical laws - no reason why it should not. Nevertheless, he decided to proceed on the assumption that it was much like the space he knew

  The Other World might even be inhabited. That was an in­triguing thought! In which case anything could happen through ‘magic'. Anything! Time to stop speculating and get down to a little solid re­search. He had previously regretfully given up trying to apply the formulas of the medieval magicians. It appeared that they never wrote down all of a procedure; some essential - so the reports ran and so his experience confirmed - was handed down verbally from master to student. His experience with Schneider confirmed this; there were things, attitudes, which must needs be taught directly

  He regretfully set out to learn what he must unassisted

  ‘Gosh, Uncle Gus, i'm glad to see you!

  ‘Decided I'd better look in on you. You haven't phoned me in weeks.

  ‘That's true, but I've been working awfully hard, Uncle Gus.

  ‘Too hard, maybe. Mustn't overdo it. Lemme see your tongue.~ ‘I'm OK.' But Waldo stuck out his tongue just the same; Grimes looked at it and felt his pulse

  ‘You seem to be ticking all right. Learning anything?

  ‘Quite a lot. I've about got the matter of the deKalbs whipped.

  ‘That's good. The message you sent Stevens seemed to indi­cate that you had found some hookup that could be used on my pet problem too.~ ‘In a way, yes; but around from the other end. It begins to seem as if it was your problem which created Stevens's prob­lem.

  ‘Huh?

  ‘ Imean it. The symptoms caused by ultra short-wave radia­tion may have had a lot to do with the erratic behaviour of the deKalbs.

  ‘ How?' ‘I don't know myself. But I've rigged up a working hypo­thesis and I'm checking it.

  ‘Hm-m-m. Want to talk about it?

  ‘Certainly - to you.' Waldo launched into an account of his interview with Schneider, concerning which he had not pre­viously spoken to Grimes, even though Grimes had made the trip with him. He never, as Grimes knew, discussed anything until he was ready to

  The story of the third set of deKalbs to be infected with the incredible writhings caused Grimes to raise his eyebrows. ‘Mean to say you caught on how to do that?

  ‘Yes indeed. Not "how", maybe, but I can do it. I've done it more than once. I'll show you.' He drifted away towards one side of the great room where several sets of deKalbs, large and small, were mounted, with their controls, on temporary guys. ‘This fellow over on the end, it just came in today. Broke down. I'll give it Gramps Schneider's hocus-pocus and fix it. Wait a minute. I forgot to turn on the power.

  He returned to the central ring which constituted his usual locus and switched on the beamcaster. Since the ship itself effectively shielded anything in the room from outer radiation, he had installed a small power plant and caster similar in type to NAPA's giant ones; without it he would have had no way to test the reception of the deKalbs

  He rejoined Grimes and passed down the line of deKalbs, switching on the activizing circuits. All save two began to dis­play the uncouth motions he had begun to think of as the Schneider flex. ‘That one on the far end,' he remarked, ‘is in operation but doesn't flex. It has never broken down, so it's never been treated. It's my control; but this one' - he touched the one in front of him - ‘needs fixing. Watch me.

  ‘What are you going to do?

  ‘To tell the truth, I don't quite know. But I'll do it.' He did not know. All he knew was that it was necessary to gaze down the antennae, think about them reaching into the Other World, think of them reaching for power, reaching - The antennae began to squirm

  ‘That's all there is to it - strictly between ourselves. I learned it from Schneider.' They had returned to the centre of the sphere, at Grimes's suggestion, on the pretext of wanting to get a cigarette. The squirming deKalbs made him nervous, but he did not want to say so

  ‘How do you explain it?

  ‘I regard it as an imperfectly understood phenomenon of the Other Space. I know less about it than Franklin knew about lightning. But I will know- I will! I could give Stevens a solution right now for his worries if I knew some way to get around your problem too.

  ‘I don't see the connexion.

  ‘There ought to be some way to do the whole thing through the Other Space. Start out by radiating power into the Other Space and pick it up from there. Then the radiation could not harm human beings. It would never get at them; it would duck around them. I've been working on my caster, but with no luck so far. I'll crack it in time.

  ‘I hope you do. Speaking of that, isn't the radiation from your own caster loose in this room?

  ‘Yes.

  ‘Then I'll put on my shield coat. It's not good for you either.

  ‘Never mind. I'll turn it off.' As he turned to do so there was the sound of a sweet, chirruping whistle. Baldur barked. Grimes turned to see what caused it

  ‘What,' he demanded, ‘have you got there?

  ‘Huh? Oh, That's my cuckoo clock. Fun, isn't it?' Grimes agreed that it was, although he could not see much use for it. Waldo had mounted it on the edge of a light metal hoop which spun with a speed just sufficient to produce a centrifugal force of one g

  ‘I rigged it up,' Waldo continued, ‘while I was bogged down in this problem of the Other Space. Gave me something to do.

  ‘This "Other Space" business - I still don't get it.

  ‘Think of another continuum much like our own and super­posed on it the way you might lay one sheet of paper on another. The two spaces aren't identical, but they are separated from each other by the smallest interval you can imagine - coextensive but not touching - usually. There is an absolute one-to- one, point-for-point correspondence, as I con­ceive it, between the two spaces, but they are not necessarily the same size or shape.

  ‘Hey? Come again - they would have to be.

  ‘Not at all. Which has the larger number of points in it? A line an inch long, or a line a mile long?

  ‘A mile long, of course.

  ‘No. They have exactly the same number of points. Want me to prove it?

  ‘I'll take your word for it. But I never studied that sort of maths.

  ‘All right. Take my word for it then. Neither size nor shape is any impediment to setting up a full, point-for-point corres­pondence between two spaces. Neither of the words is really appropriate. "Size" has to do with a space's own inner struc­ture, its dimensions in terms of its own unique constants. "Shape" is a matter which happens inside itself - or at least not inside our space - and has to do with how it is curved, open or closed, expanding or contracting.

  Grimes shrugged. ‘It all sounds like gibberish to me.' He returned to watching the cuckoo clock swing round and round its wheel

  ‘Sure it does,' Waldo assented cheerfully. ‘We are limited by our experience. Do you know how I think of the Other World?' The question was purely rhetorical. ‘I think of it as about the size and shape of an ostrich egg, but nevertheless a whole universe, existing side by side with our own, from here to the farthest star. I know that it's a false picture, but it helps me to think about it that way.

  ‘I wouldn't know,' said Grimes, and turned himself around in the air. The compound motion of the clock's pendulum was making him a little dizzy. ‘Say! I thought you turned off the caster?

  ‘I did,' Waldo agreed, and looked where Grimes was look­ing. The deKalbs were still squirming. ‘I thought I did,' he said doubtfully, and turned to the caster's control board. His eyes then opened wider. ‘But I did. It is turned off.

  ‘Then what the devil-

  ‘Shut up!' He had to think - think hard. Was the caster actually out of operation? He floated himself over to it, in­spected it. Yes, it was dead, dead as th
e dinosaurs. Just to make sure he went back, assumed his primary waldoes, cut in the necessary circuits, and partially disassembled it. But the deKalbs still squirmed

  The one deKalb set which had not been subjected to the Schneider treatment was dead; it gave out no power hum. But the others were working frantically, gathering power from -where?

  He wondered whether or not McLeod had said anything to Granmps Schneider about the casters from which the deKalbs were intended to pick up their power. Certainly he himself had not. It simply had not come into the conversation. But Schnei­der had said something. ‘The Other World is close by and full of power!

  In spite of his own intention of taking the old man literally he had ignored that statement. The Other World is full of power. I am sorry I snapped at you, Uncle Gus,' he said

  'S all right.

  ‘But what do you make of that?

  ‘Looks like you've invented perpetual motion, son.

  ‘In a way, perhaps. Or maybe we've repealed the law of con­servation of energy. Those de Kalbs are drawing energy that was never before in this world!

  ‘Hm-m-m!

  To check his belief he returned to the control ring, donned his waldoes, cut in a mobile scanner, and proceeded to search the space around the deKalbs with the most sensitive pickup for the radio power band he had available. The needles never jumped; the room was dead in the wave lengths to which the deKalbs were sensitive. The power came from Other Space

  The power came from Other Space. Not from his own beamcaster, not from NAPA's shiny stations, but from Other Space. In that case he was not even close to solving the prob­1cm of the defective deKalbs; he might never solve it. Wait, now - just what had he contracted to do? He tried to recall the exact words of the contract

  There just might be a way around it. Maybe. Yes, and this newest cockeyed trick of Gramps Schneider's little pets could have some very tricky aspects. He began to see some possibili­ties, but he needed to think about it

  ‘Uncle Gus-

  ‘Yes, Waldo?

  ‘You can go back and tell Stevens that I'll be ready with the answers. We'll get his problem licked, and yours too. In the meantime I've got to do some really heavy thinking, so I want to be by myself, please.

  ‘Greetings, Mr Gleason. Quiet, Baldur! Comein. Be com­fortable. How do you do, Dr Stevens.

  ‘How do you do, Mr Jones.

  ‘This,' said Gleason, indicating a figure trailing him, ‘is Mr. Harkness, head of our legal staff.

  ‘Ah, yes indeed. There will be matters of contract to be dis­cussed. Welcome to Freehold, Mr Harkness.

  ‘Thank you,' Harkness said coldly. ‘Will your attorneys be present?

  ‘They are present.' Waldo indicated a stereo screen. Two figures showed in it; they bowed and murmured polite forms

  ‘This is most irregular,' Harkness complained. ‘Witnesses should be present in person. Things seen and heard by television are not evidence.

  Waldo drew his lips back. ‘Do you wish to make an issue of it?

  ‘Not at all,' Gleason said hastily. ‘Never mind, Charles.' Harkness subsided

  ‘I won't waste your time, gentlemen,' Waldo began. ‘We are here in order that I may fulfil my contract with you. The terms are known, we will pass over them.' He inserted his arms into his primary waldoes. ‘Lined up along the far wall you will see a number of radiant power receptors, commonly called deKalbs. Dr Stevens may, if he wishes, check their serial numbers-

  ‘No need to.

  ‘Very well. I shall start my local beamcaster, in order that we may check the efficiency of their operation.' His waldoes were busy as he spoke. ‘Then I shall activate the receptors, one at a time.' His hands pawed the air; a little pair of secondaries switched on the proper switches on the control board of the last set in line. ‘This is an ordinary type, supplied to me by Dr Stevens, which has never failed in operation. You may assure yourself that it is now operating in the normal manner, if you wish, Doctor.

  ‘I can see that it is.

  ‘We will call such a receptor a "deKalb" and its operation "normal".' The small waldoes were busy again. ‘Here we have a receptor which I choose to term a "Schneider-deKalb" be­cause of certain treatment it has received' the antennae be­gan to move - ‘and its operation "Schneider-type" operation. Will you check it, Doctor?

  ‘OK.

  ‘You fetched with you a receptor set which has failed?

  ‘As you can see.

  ‘Have you been able to make it function?

  ‘No, I have not.

  ‘Are you sure? Have you examined it carefully?

  ‘Quite carefully,' Stevens acknowledged sourly. He was be­ginning to be tired of Waldo's pompous flubdubbery

  ‘Very well. I will now proceed to make it operative.' Waldo left his control ring, shoved himself over to the vicinity of the defective deKalb, and placed himself so that his body covered his exact actions from the sight of the others. He returncd to the ring and, using waldoes, switched on the activating circuit of the dcKalb

  It immediately exhibited Schneider-type activity

  ‘That is my case, gentlemen,' he announced. ‘I have found out how to repair deKalbs which become spontaneously inop­erative. I will undertake to apply the Schneider treatment to any receptors which you may bring to me. That is included in my fee. I will undertake to train others in how to apply the Schneider treatment. That is included in my fee, but I cannot guarantee that any particular man will profit by my instruc­tion. Without going into technical details I may say that the treatment is very difficult, much harder than it looks. I think that Dr Stevens will confirm that.' He smiled thinly. ‘I believe that completes my agreement with you.

  ‘Just a moment, Mr Jones,' put in Gleason. ‘Is a deKalb foolproof, once it has received the Schneider treatment?

  ‘Quite. I guarantee it.

  They went into a huddle while Waldo waited. At last Glea­son spoke for them. ‘These are not quite the results we had expected, Mr Jones, but we agree that you have fulfilled your commission - with the understanding that you will Schneider-treat any receptors brought to you and instruct others, accord­ing to their ability to learn.

  ‘That is correct.

  ‘Your fee will be deposited to your account at once.

  ‘Good. That is fully understood and agreed? I have com­pletely and successfully performed your commission?

  ‘Correct.

  ‘Very well then. I have one more thing to show you. If you will be patient-' A section of the wall folded back; gigantic waldoes reached into the room beyond and drew forth a large apparatus, which resembled somewhat in general form an ordi­nary set of deKalbs, but which was considerably more compli­cated. Most of the complications were sheer decoration, but it would have taken a skilled engineer a long time to prove the fact

  The machine did contain one novel feature: a built-in meter of a novel type, whereby it could be set to operate for a predetermined time and then destroy itself, and a radio con­trol whereby the time limit could be varied. Furthermore, the meter would destroy itself and the receptors if tampered with by any person not familiar with its design. It was Waldo's tentative answer to the problem of selling free and unlimited power

  But of these matters he said nothing. Small waldoes had been busy attaching guys to the apparatus; when they were through he said, ‘This, gentlemen, is an instrument which I choose to call a Jones-Schneider-deKalb. And it is the reason why you will not be in the business of selling power much longer.~ ‘So?' said Gleason. ‘May I ask why?

  ‘Because,' he was told, ‘I can sell it more cheaply and con­veniently and under circumstances you cannot hope to match.

  ‘That is a strong statement.

  ‘I will demonstrate. Dr Stevens, you have noted that the other receptors are operating. I will turn them off.' The wal­does did so. ‘I will now stop the beamcast and I will ask you to assure yourself, by means of your own instruments, that there is no radiant power, other than ordinary visible light, in this
room.

  Somewhat sullenly Stevens did so. ‘The place is dead,' he announced some minutes later

  ‘Good. Keep your instruments in place, that you may be sure it remains dead. I will now activate my receptor.' Little mechanical hands closed the switches. ‘Observe it, Doctor. Go over it thoroughly.

  Stevens did so. He did not trust the readings shown by its instrument hoard; he attached his own meters in parallel. ‘How about it, James?' Gleason whispered

  Stevens looked disgusted. ‘The damn thing draws power from nowhere!

  They all looked at Waldo. ‘Take plenty of time, gentle­men,' he said grandly. ‘Talk it over.

  They withdrew as far away as the room permitted and whis­pered. Waldo could see that Harkness and Stevens were argu­ing, that Stevens was noncommittal. That suited him. He was hoping that Stevens would not decide to take another look at the fancy gadget he had termed a Jones-Schneider-deKalb. Stevens must not learn too much about it - yet. He had been careful to say nothing but the truth about it, but perhaps he had not said all of the truth; he had not mentioned that all Schneider-treated deKalbs were sources of free power

  Rather embarrassing if Stevens should discover that! The meter-and-destruction device Waldo had purposely made mysterious and complex, but it was not useless. Later he would be able to point out, quite correctly, that without such a device NAPA simply could not remain in business

  Waldo was not easy. The whole business was a risky gamble; he would have much preferred to know more about the phenomena he was trying to peddle, but - he shrugged mentally while preserving a smile of smug confidence - the business had dragged on several months already, and the power situation really was critical. This solution would do - if he could get their names on the dotted line quickly enough

  For he had no intention of trying to compete with NAPA