Does she want me to believe this fictitious story? Adam keeps looking at Rania in shock.
“Fadil is just the opposite of his brother. Throughout time, he has helped those Kiya-faced women and warned them about Khaldun, but he couldn’t save any of them. He told every woman, in every era, that they can come out of the curse if they truly find a soul mate. A man who could see a woman, beyond her beauty, directly into her soul. Every time, when a Kiya-faced woman got married or had a man in her life, Khaldun manipulated the man’s demon and took over the body and soul, creating only differences and hatred between them. He can’t see his wife being shared by any human. Fadil says that in all those four thousand years, not a single man was born who could be so powerful that he wouldn’t let Khaldun guide his demon. There is no man yet with such a strong soul.” She blinks again.
“Khaldun never harmed any of those women because he knew they would die eventually, but he never let any man come close to them, either. All those women died without love, with no soul mate for them.” She turns around, resting her back on the cold glass windows.
“Unfortunately, in this time, I possess Kiya’s beauty. He thinks I am his wife.”
Adam still looks at her with shock. Shit. She has such a wild imagination.
“Jibran was not a bad man, Adam. When I said Egypt changed my fate, I meant that’s when I met Khaldun for the first time, inside a pyramid. He didn’t know of my existence before that. And when he saw me, I was already married to Jibran. He provoked Jibran’s demon for vengeance, because he couldn’t accept seeing his wife married to any other man.” She wipes the tears with the back of her hand.
“I would never blame Jibran; it was not his fault. His soul was weak, so he listened to his demon and not his true soul. Every time he tried to make love to me, I could see Khaldun standing next to us. He used to curse me that I was betraying him, betraying the Jinni I married. My body used to freeze, when I knew someone else was watching our love scene. I never felt any intimacy. There was no privacy, Adam. That is why I was defying him all the time, which enraged him. My coldness and frigidness brought out a demon in Jibran. I created a devil in him. He was not a bad man when I married him, but my curse created a demon.”
She looks directly into Adam’s eyes.
“But things are different this time, according to Fadil. When you entered my life, Fadil informed me that you possess a very powerful soul. There is no way Khaldun is able to communicate with your demon. He is failing; his powers are failing. Nothing like Jibran. But I don’t want to take a risk with you, Adam. I don’t want to create a demon in you.” She averts her eyes, turns around and faces toward the world outside.
“When you tried to kiss me the first time in Edmonton, before going to the Opera, I wanted to feel it, but Khaldun was standing right there, whispering warnings in my ears. Every time you intended to kiss me, he was right there, making my body cold and unable to react to your touch.” She steps closer to him and holds his face in her hands.
“What you saw in Edmonton, me standing on the balcony, it was true, Adam. I was in their world, arguing with Khaldun, telling him to leave you alone. And every time I spoke to him, you came from nowhere to pull me out of his world. I don’t know how you were able to find me, but you were always there, Adam. When you mistreated me at the party, I was relieved that Khaldun would never harm you again. And I wouldn’t be responsible for making you a demon. But then, when you confessed under the stars and I started feeling you once again, he came there again and stood between us. I couldn’t do anything, except push you away with my cold body and tears. All the incidents that you experienced, my presence in the washroom, staring at the mirror, my soul was talking to him in his world. That’s why I couldn’t hear you. But every time you touched me, Adam, I saw Khaldun’s power failing in front of my eyes.” He is still staring at her in shock.
“Fadil started giving me hope that maybe, my curse or Kiya’s curse would end, if your soul is really strong enough to protect you from your demon being controlled by Khaldun. But the problem is, I can’t love you back, Adam. Every time when you are close to me, he is standing right here by my side. I can’t be intimate or take off my clothes, when I know there is someone else beside me, glaring at me, cursing me. And I feared if I pushed you away, you would be furious, just like Jibran was.”
She holds his face in her hands again. “You mean a lot to me, Adam, and I don’t want to lose you. That’s why I would want to stay friends with you forever, rather than turning you into a demon.” She sighs.
“You know I told you once that all the humans are assigned a Jinni, a demon who whispers things to make you commit sins. And there is an angel assigned to us who stops us from committing the sin. It is up to us, to whom we want to listen. God has given us the power to decide our own fates.” She shakes her head.
“In my case, my demon is ruled by Khaldun. Whenever I felt love, when I was with Jibran or with you, my own demon abandoned me and told Khaldun what I was doing. That’s why he is always there in our private moments.” She steals a glance at him.
“After I realized my demon was betraying me this way, I stopped reacting to Jibran’s touch. I was able to at least provide him with my cold body, and not reject him during sex. But since he also held a demon in him, it frustrated him that my body was like dead meat. I was useless to him.” She looks at him.
“And I’m useless to you too, Adam.” She pauses. “I don’t know if you believe me or not, because you always say you only believe what you see.” She shakes her head. “You never saw Khaldun, Adam, but you were in his world, and I know you felt him.”
He keeps looking into her eyes, not sure if he can believe her or not. But he had seen her on a nonexistent balcony in the Edmonton hotel room, and she had known it all the time. She had never felt like she could trust him enough to tell him the truth.
“Remember you said to me once that you felt someone’s presence during our private moments, someone pushing you away?” She looks at him. “He was pushing you, Adam, and you felt him.”
“What were you doing in the pool, then?” His sudden question sends Rania into confusion. She closes her eyes and removes her hands from his face.
“Last night when we…when we were in the moment and I told you to take me wherever you wanted me to, he was right there. I was trying to ignore him, and trying my best to feel your love. I was denying him, which no one had in all those years. He was furious at my rebellious attitude, and he warned me that he would kill you if I let you claim my body and soul. That’s why I started to cry in fear. After you fell asleep, he called me to the poolside and told me that I had exceeded the limits of his patience. That I had betrayed my husband.” She takes a deep, painful breath. “He gave me a choice of lives—either yours or mine. And I gave him mine.”
“You’re saying that you went there to surrender your life to him?” Adam asks her frantically. He is still not sure if he should believe her story or not.
“I couldn’t put your life at risk, Adam. It’s too precious to be taken away because of my curse. It’s on me and not on you. I would never risk your life.”
He hugs her tightly. He isn’t sure if anything she has said is true or not, but the knowledge that she cared more for his life than her own is enough for him. Still, he cannot manage to believe her. In the back of his mind, he decides that he will discuss all this with Dr. Nicolson, and see what she has to say about Rania’s condition.
One thing is confirmed—she is not a sleepwalker. She knew where she was going, but she was imagining someone else there. She is imagining characters in her life that don’t exist. Adam is too practical to believe in creatures he is not able to see himself. He wants desperately to help Rania, but he is uncertain about her condition. He actually saw a balcony, in Edmonton, and he saw her standing on it, but it was gone the next day. So he was not imagining that. Was it actually the world of the Jinn? Did he travel into their world to look for Rania? Can he possibly believe what she’s
telling him?
He kisses her forehead. At the moment, he is perplexed, his mind hopping between truth and fiction. How could he ever believe that when he was intimate with Rania, there was someone else standing between them? Someone he can’t see. Is there actually any Khaldun or Kiya or Fadil? Or are they just creations of her wild imagination? But somewhere deep inside, his conscience is demanding to believe her. He did feel an unseen force around him when he tried to kiss her in the past. He did feel someone pushing him away from her.
His kisses travel to her eyes and then to her cheeks. He cups her face in his hands and kisses her lips passionately, claiming her mouth. She lets him in and savors all his flavors through her tongue. Adam moves Rania and rests her back against the wall. He entwines both his hands in hers and fixes them on the wall, over her head, and starts kissing and licking her neck. She feels breathless, every tantalizing touch shaking all her reflexes. Her knees weaken, but Adam’s firm grip on her hands keeps her from falling.
“Don’t think about anyone else, Rania. I want to be in your life, forever, in your reality, in your imagination, in your fantasy. I want to be the only man, so that you don’t imagine any Khaldun or Fadil or Jibran in your life.” He whispers in her ear. “I will find you everywhere, Rania.” He looks at her, his gaze heated.
“Where you go, I go. Where you exist, I exist. And if you ever need to find me, just find yourself. I’m always there.” He places his lips once again on hers. “And I know if I am ever lost, all I have to do is to find you.” His words are melting her more than his touch. She will never forget this moment—the moment of assurance Adam has given her.
She starts believing that Adam believes what she has told him, though the truth is something else. Adam is just using his love to get all the words out of her heart, so that he can discuss her issues with Nicolson. She has no idea that Adam is playing mind games with her, although his love for her has not changed a bit. He wants to help her.
“You will always be there, Adam?” Her eyes are full of hope. He kisses her tenderly on the lips.
“You know you have become my habit now. It’s kinda difficult to give up a habit, isn’t it?” He chuckles at her, lightening up the mood. She giggles in return, which makes his heart smile deeply inside him.
The ringing of his phone interrupts their magical moment. Adam sees Ali’s name on the screen. He knows Ali never calls him unless it’s necessary. He puts the phone on speaker.
“Yes, Ali?”
“Just wondering if you’re ready, so I can pick you up?”
“Where are we going?” Adam asks Ali, looking at Rania.
“You have a conference to attend regarding Green Homes, in thirty minutes.”
Adam checks the time. “Shit. I forgot. Can we call it off?” His eyes are still on her.
“I don’t think it’s a sensible decision, Adam. You have some interviews lined up, too.”
“Yeah, I know.” Adam rolls his eyes and notices Rania smiling at him. “I don’t know why they do everything on the weekend.”
“You were always available on weekends, Adam.” Adam can feel Ali smiling. “You’re the one who has changed your priorities. Not them.”
Rania decides to walk away, but Adam grabs her hand. “Ali, just hold on for a second.” He puts his phone on mute. “I want you to come with me.”
“What would I do there, Adam? It’s your official meeting.”
“I want to see you, wherever I go.” He looks at her intensely. She smiles back at him and places her palm on his chest, over his heart.
“You have me here. So it doesn’t matter where I am physically. Right?”
Ah! I can never win an argument. She makes me speechless. Adam looks at her lovingly.
“You go ahead with your meetings. I’m here, exploring this kingdom on my own, and I will see you in the evening, okay?” She smiles so innocently that it is hard for him to contradict her. He unmutes his phone and talks to Ali.
“I’ll be ready in fifteen minutes. See you.” He puts the phone back into his pocket. “You sure you are gonna be okay? I will be free by seven. We’ll go out for dinner then.”
“Sounds good to me, but of course I’ll be okay. And Julianne is also here. If I need anything, I can ask her.”
“All right. I left your phone at the bedside. Make sure to use it, because I will be texting you like crazy.” He kisses her cheek and heads to the washroom to get ready. “And eat well. You haven’t had your breakfast.” He speaks over his shoulder as if he’s giving her an order, which makes her smile.
DISCLOSURE
♂
I step out of the building and see Ali outside, waiting for me with the car. I don’t want to leave Rania right now, but sometimes in life we have no choice. I should start changing my schedule. Weekends should be for her, and nothing else. Ali sees my expression and gives me a strange look.
“How is Rania?” he asks with concern.
“She is...okay.” I don’t know what to say. How am I supposed to tell him that she has imaginary people in her life, who might be causing a split personality?
“Did she agree to see the therapist?”
“She says she’s not a sleepwalker. She was awake when she went to the pool. She deliberately tried to drown herself. I can’t believe it.” I shrug with helpless frustration. Ali looks at me with shock, trying to take in what I’ve said. “She’s imagining characters in her life. I’m thinking the stories she reads are becoming real to her. She says she sees and communicates with a fucking Jinni. Can you believe it?”
“Hmm.” Interestingly, Ali doesn’t seem surprised. “You mentioned you have heard her talking to people in the middle of the night, right?”
“Yes. I’m assuming she’s talking to her imaginary friends.”
“I doubt it, Adam. She seems normal to me. She seems aware of reality. She could be correct. Maybe you should trust her.”
“What? You want me to believe that she communicates with the Jinn? Do you believe in that, Ali?”
“As a matter of fact, I do! Even if I can’t see them, that doesn’t mean I deny their existence.” Ali speaks casually. “Same goes for angels. You can’t see them, right? But you can’t say they don’t exist.”
“I can’t believe it, Ali, that a man like you would talk like this.” I roll my eyes in frustration.
“It’s our belief, Adam. You cannot force anyone into a certain kind of belief. A girl like Rania, I don’t think she would lie. But anyway, you shouldn’t be telling me this. She trusted you to keep her secret. Make sure you don’t share it with anyone else. Not even with Nicolson.”
“So you’re saying she doesn’t have any kind of mental disorder? Ali, do you have any idea what I saw at the pool? She would have died if I hadn’t come in time.”
“She is wise enough to take her own decisions, Adam. God gives these powers to those who He knows can handle them. She may know how to handle the power.”
I look at him in shock. “What exactly are you trying to say?”
“What I am saying, is that Dr. Nicolson would never believe this theory of Jinn, because medical science can’t prove it. Religion goes by faith, not on scientific logic. She may put Rania on drugs—what else would a doctor do? But that is not the cure.”
“What’s the cure then? Even if I agree she sees them, what can we do?”
“I’m not sure what she told you, Adam. The Holy Quran mentions some ways to prevent their influence. But then, I’m sure she would know about those. If they’re not working…then…” Ali is lost in thought.
“Then what?”
“I don’t know, Adam. The one she is talking about might not be a bad Jinni.”
“All Jinn are Satanic, aren’t they?” I ask.
“No. Satan and his descendants are Jinn, but not all Jinn are Satanic or demonic. There are good ones too. I am not sure what she has told you.”
“She told me that some four-thousand-year-old Jinni is obsessively in love with her and cla
ims to be her husband, which doesn’t allow her to be involved with any human man.”
“Hmm.” I can see Ali thinking hard. His eyes are fixed on the road. “It happens…the Jinn falling in love with beautiful women.”
“What the hell? Do you seriously want me to believe this?”
“I am not the one to tell you, Adam. Their existence is part of our faith. You can believe it or not, but it is true. This can happen.” He glances at me, and then focuses on his driving. “And you know, there was a time when humans and Jinn used to get married. That’s when God revealed His words in the Quran: And Allah has made wives for you from among yourselves. Holy Quran (16: 72). Among yourselves means, marry within humankind. There is a complete chapter about them in the Quran, leaving no choice but for us to believe in their existence.”
He looks at me for a second. “And a woman’s beauty, her hair, her fragrance, it’s their weakness, Adam. That’s why the women in our religion are asked to cover themselves, to avoid demonic eyes.” He focuses again on the road. “And demonic eyes don’t necessarily mean the ferocious eyes of men; it could be a Jinni too.” He stops the car at a red light and looks at me. “Unfortunately, the woman you are in love with has the beauty to attract both men and the Jinn.”
We drive in silence, without talking about it further. I look at Ali from time to time, wondering what makes him believe Rania. Rania told me about the concepts of angels and demons from her religious point of view, confirming their existence, but I never thought Ali would have the same belief, even though he shares her religious background. But what she told me about Khaldun, casting curses on women for four thousand years, could it all be true? How can I ever accept this story she has bombarded me with? I can’t deny the fact that I did notice her body going cold and stiff from time to time, even when I knew she was feeling me. But it’s really hard for me to credit it.
A Prayer Heeded Page 14
