The side of her that she showed me, and the way I ran like a coward, keeps me from confronting her. I know I promised to love and cherish her forever, and made her believe that I would trust her whenever she chose to disclose her past to me, but what she did disclose is beyond my endurance. I’m such a coward that I never bothered to look at how much I might have damaged her. After what I did to her, I don’t even have the strength to look at myself in the mirror and confront my own reflection.
I searched for that woman for a whole damn year. Although the thought that she could be Rania did cross my mind a couple of times, still, I never imagined it to be true. I always thought Rania was a normal human being with a hideous past. What she has shown to me, I can’t share with anyone.
In all the moments when I confessed my true feelings to her, I kept reminding her how much I love her. I kept telling her that I wouldn’t be able to live without her. I know she loved me too, but I never asked myself if she would be able to live without me. But then, when I come to think of it, I am also living without her. The puppet show is still running, ruled by the One and Only Master of the Universe.
I didn’t die, mourning her. He has kept me alive through all this. It is a bitter truth, but I’m breathing, I’m sleeping, I’m eating, I’m still cracking million-dollar deals—I’m doing everything a normal person does. My life has not ended. It’s just that I’ve stopped looking at women anymore. She was my wildest fantasy and will remain that, no matter how hard I try.
Whatever I experienced, with her and without her, I just don’t understand why I saw and felt all those supernatural powers. Of all the people in the world, why did I end up in that spiral passage and experience the unseen shadows, and fall in love with a girl without even knowing her? Why, of all the women in the world, did Rania have to be the same woman who cast a spell on me? Why doesn’t my life consist of normal things, where normal people lead their lives with other normal people?
When I was a kid, I remember that when I used to play games, I was always given three chances. No more, no less. When I grew up and fell in love, God gave me more than three chances. He heard my prayer when I searched for that woman for months, and gave me Rania as an answer. He gave me a second chance to relive my life when I thought I lost her in the fire. The very next day, I pushed her out of my life, forgetting the chance God gave me. I brought her back, confessing my love again, and since she is the kindest woman I have ever met, she forgave me and accepted me.
Again, when I thought I lost her by drowning in the pool, He overlooked my mistakes once more and gave me back my love. Still, ignoring all my blessings, I mistreated her and walked out of her life like a coward. I pushed her away from me so far that now I can’t even see her shadow.
I don’t remember how many chances I was given to have the woman of my fantasy. I don’t know if there are any more chances left for me. Do I deserve another chance? Even if I do get a chance, do I have enough strength to face her?
She is the only woman I have ever loved. Her memories, her touch, her feel—everything is engraved on my soul now. I know I will never be able to feel the same for anyone else. She holds such power over me—the power to turn ugly into beautiful bliss, just with her smile, a whisper of my name or a simple touch. Just one look from her could take my breath away. She is in my blood like a drug, and I can’t get rid of her now. With her or without her, she will remain in me. She has enslaved me with her beauty, a refinement for which there is no match in Heaven and earth. I am hers forever, no matter if we are together or apart.
I drive back home from my mother’s house in Burlington. She invited me to celebrate my birthday and arranged a private family dinner. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t have my mother to share my feelings with. The woman who gave me back my family is nowhere to be seen now. But I know I owe her for eternity. I find peace when I see my mother. Although she doesn’t know what I experienced last month, she understands that my path and Rania’s have been separated. She never questions me about Rania’s disappearance, or why I don’t see her or talk about her, but as a mother, she truly recognizes my feelings.
I’m enjoying driving my Aston Martin, when the engine suddenly dies in the middle of a dark road. I try to turn on the ignition, but it doesn’t respond. I step out of the car, feeling the cold March air stirring every part of my body. I take out my phone to call Ali to pick me up, but I have no signal. Strange.
I try to figure out what to do next, but nothing seems to work when technology doesn’t cooperate with you.
I look around. It is midnight, and pitch dark. I’m somewhere in the deep woods of Hamilton, but not sure exactly where. I don’t see any streetlights, and in this deep dark forest, I don’t expect to find any houses or businesses. My car is completely dead—I can’t even get the GPS to work to find out where I am.
I take my car keys and start walking down the pitch-dark road. Huge, dense, tall old trees arch over the roadway, making it difficult for me to even catch a glimpse of the sky. I walk silently for a few minutes, until I see some lights at a turn in the road. Who would live in this creepy forest?
I run toward the light and as I get near it, I hear loud music playing. It seems like there’s a party going on. As I get closer to the light, I come to an old wooden fence. I open the gate and step into another forest. The path is curved, and I see many-colored lights just around the curve. After two minutes of walking, I can finally see where the lights and music are coming from.
I’m stunned and disbelieving; it looks like a dance club in the middle of the forest. I wonder who would come all the way out here, but I see that, being Friday night, it’s extremely crowded. I don’t know why in the world I never knew about this place. It’s a very beautiful and unique idea, having something like this in the forest. But what intrigues me most is there is no wall surrounding the club. It’s open to the dark woods. I wonder if they’re ever bothered by wolves or coyotes, but looking at the crazy people and the excitement in the club, I doubt if that has crossed anyone’s mind.
I enter under enormous lights, and gawk at the magnificence of the club. I notice a huge bar at one side, and never in my life have I seen such a large variety of drinks. Even though there are no walls or roof, and it’s early March, it’s not chilly in here. I see men and women dancing in regular clothes, and they don’t seem to be feeling the cold at all. I wonder what kind of heating system they have, that outside the forest is so cold, and as soon as I stepped into this club, the temperature felt normal.
I scoot a stool over and sit across from the bartender. He is completely involved in making drinks for the other people passing by. I observe men and women around me, and notice all of them are extremely beautiful—almost perfect. I have never seen a crowd like this in my life. Not just women, but the men too are exquisite. I admire the perfection of the bartender’s work as he smoothly makes drink after drink.
“Do you find my club appealing, Mr. Gibson?” a man says to me. He walks toward me and sits two seats away. I look at him, perplexed, wondering how he knows my name. But then I thought, if he owns the club, he might have heard my name from the construction business.
“Yes, it’s very nice.” I look around at the ambience. “I’m quite impressed with the interior. You’ve drawn a huge crowd, in the middle of nowhere.” I look at him. “People usually go to urban places for drinks and dancing; this is quite a new venue for a club.”
“Thank you, Mr. Gibson. We also have the finest varieties of drinks to offer, too. Would you like to try one? Be my guest. Share a birthday drink.” He offers his hospitality.
Since I have nothing else to do, I decide to spend some time and have a business discussion with this man. I nod with a smile, and he asks his bartender to make me a drink.
I look at the owner, and I can’t help thinking that I’ve never seen such a perfect man. He is young, tall, with a broad physique, light blue eyes, dark blond hair and flawless skin. He is dressed in a white shirt and pants, giving him
a very clean look. It looks like he’s been showered in milk; I never thought men could be so clean and immaculate. He possesses a similar beauty to Rania’s: pure, divine and angelic.
I take a sip of my drink and am impressed with how delectable it tastes. I look at my glass, wondering if it’s whiskey or rum, but it doesn’t taste like anything I’ve ever had before.
“This is amazing.” I rotate my glass. “What is it?”
“This is from our finest collection. You won’t find it anywhere else in this world,” the owner says, matter-of-factly.
I stay quiet and focus on my drink. I look around again and see many beautiful, sexually provocative women. I look up and see how tastefully the lights are illuminating the entire club. I look down at the floor, and am totally awed with its perfection. It’s made of transparent glass, with water and lights flowing under it, flawlessly. I don’t know how they have built something like this in the middle of the woods. They would have had to dig deep underground to install the water tank and the glass flooring.
From what I see, the club looks endless. Wherever my eyes wander, I can’t see any walls, or any end to it. I face the bar wall in front of me, and notice how neatly the drinks are displayed, beautiful hues of light shining from behind them.
“We have the finest women in our club also, Mr. Gibson.” His voice slits my mind.
I watch him keenly for a few seconds, and shake my head. “No, thank you. I’m not interested. I will be leaving shortly. Thank you for your hospitality.”
“Woman…” His voice trails off in the air. “A symbol of beauty, fantasy and sexuality.” He is moving his glass in a circular motion while talking. I don’t know if it’s a generic statement or if he’s talking to me.
“God created Eve from Adam’s rib, to give him peace, pleasure and tranquility. When Adam saw Eve for the very first time in Heaven, he was in love.” I look at him, wondering why he’s talking to me about Adam and Eve. “Do you know what it means to create a woman from a man’s rib, Mr. Gibson?” I steal a glance at him and then look back to my drink. “It means if you try to straighten it, it would break.” I feel an alarming message in his voice. He looks toward the bar. “A woman is not an instrument of the Devil, as you used to see her. A good woman is a fortress against Satan, preventing you from committing sins and helping you keep to the path of rectitude in your life.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I look at him, confused.
He laughs heartily. “A man like you doesn’t want a woman anymore? Why, Mr. Gibson?” I don’t like the way he’s questioning me, because I don’t think it’s any of his damn business. He says, “It’s none of my business; that’s what you are thinking, right?” I look at him in shock, wondering if he is able to read my mind.
“Let me guess…” He stands up and the bartender hands him a round across the bar. Then he stands behind me, so I can’t see his face. “Just like Adam in Heaven, you were given your Eve, who protected you from committing sins. Unlike Adam, who was not given the choice of going with other women, you, my friend, were given tremendous choices. But your Eve protected you from sins the moment you set your eyes on her.” I can feel his disapproving look.
“Let me tell you something about you.” He pauses. “You are madly in love with a woman of your fantasy, for whom you searched for one damn year. You found one, finding her beauty close to that woman of your dreams, and started begging her to trust you.” I turn around instantly to look at him. Shit. Who is he? “When she finally trusted you…you walked out of her life like a coward.” I put my drink down and stand up to see him clearly.
“You were an animal to all the women. You treated them like a commodity. You met your Eve one fine day and she changed you completely, from a predator to a passionate lover. Your Eve changed your idea of women. You no longer desire to hunt down any woman, other than your Eve. But…” He gives me jagged looks. “You tried to straighten your Eve, Mr. Gibson. It broke her.” I have no idea who this person is, and how he has in-depth knowledge of my personal life.
“I have to leave.” That’s all I can say at this moment.
“What do you think, Mr. Gibson, that your four-hundred-thousand-dollar vehicle stopped in the middle of the forest just like that?” Fuck! How does he know? “Your LTE phone is unable to connect to the network. Why, Mr. Gibson?”
I look at him with confusion. “Who are you?”
“What you see is what you believe; that’s what you told her when she told you about the others.” That was the last thing I said to her. How come he knows everything? Is he…? No fucking way!
“What you see is what you believe.” He shakes his head and smiles. “You saw it, Adam, but you still did not believe it. You were afraid to believe it.” He walks past me. “She fought all of us to show you our world, because she knew you wouldn’t believe it if you didn’t see it with your own eyes.” I start backing up. What the fuck is going on? Who is he?
I start walking, as I want to get out of this strange place. I don’t even want to consider that what I’m guessing might be true. What is this place?
“What you see is what you believe—look around you, Adam, what do you see?” It feels like his voice is creating a wall around me, and I’m unable to move.
When I came here, the music was too loud to hear anyone’s voice. But as soon as this man started talking to me, every other sound is just background noise. I don’t know why I’m still here and why I’m even talking to him. I feel like he’s controlling my mind, and I am bound to answer him.
“I see…” I look toward the bar. “I see the beverages are kept neatly.” Why am I even talking?
“And what do you see, Adam?”
“I see how they are kept…” Shit! The liquids are only hanging in the air. There are no bottles, just the shapes of bottle-less fluids in the air. Why didn’t I notice it earlier? How is it possible? Oh my God! Where am I?
I still manage to walk, but the man follows me. I have no clue which way I came in, but I just walk on the illuminated glass floor, fearing I may break it with my heavy steps.
“What you see is what you believe—look above you, Adam. What do you see?” I keep walking, trying my best not to look behind me, but I feel like I have to obey his command. I look up in astonishment.
“I see beautiful lights…” I am walking blindly, my eyes fixed overhead at the ceiling.
“And what do you see, Adam?”
“I see how they’re hanging…” Shit, shit, shit. They’re just hanging in the air, without any wires, without any ceiling, in an open sky. In fact, there are no light fixtures; they are just light balls hanging in the air, with no gravity pulling them down. I try to focus in front of me, looking for a way out, but the more I walk, the deeper I go into the club.
“What you see is what you believe—look down, Adam, what do you see?”
“I see I’m walking on…” I look down and fall in an instant, because it’s not glass I’m walking on; I’m walking on the colorful water. How is it possible? How can I walk over water without even wetting my feet? I manage to stand up and start walking again over the water. The man is still watching me keenly.
“What you see is what you believe—look around you, Adam, what do you see?”
I keep strolling over the water, the colored lights changing above me. I notice one woman passing by me. She’s wearing a mask tied around her eyes.
“I see a woman…” Shit! Is she Rania? I look around in confusion and see other women. They are all like her. What the fuck is going on?
“What do you see, Adam?” I hear his coarse voice hitting my mind.
“I see women around me…” I take a deep breath. “They are all like her.”
He walks past me and faces me with rage.
“Now do you believe what you see?” he asks curtly. I freeze on the spot, not having the energy to walk any more. “Pick any woman, Adam Gibson. They are all like her. Fulfill your desires and overcome your wildest
fantasies.” I still look at him in shock. “I know you wouldn’t, Adam Gibson, because you know that none of them is your Eve. It wasn’t her beauty that captivated you, it was her soul that enslaved your heart.”
“What the hell is going on? Who are you?”
Suddenly the lights are gone and I am in complete darkness. I look around in fear and find myself standing in a deep dark forest, with just a spotlight on me, and this man in front of me.
“Wasn’t she your fantasy, Adam Gibson? You kept searching for her in every woman.” He’s not asking me; it’s just a damn statement. “Can your eyes believe now that they all could be her?” I’m still breathing hard, and I have no words to speak. “Answer me, Adam Gibson. Wasn’t she your fantasy?”
“Yes.” My heart is throbbing. “Yes, she was.”
“God gave you the woman of your fantasy. You promised to protect her and believe in her. She showed you everything to make you believe. Why did you act like a coward and run away?”
I’m having more trouble breathing. “I don’t know. It was paranormal. I don’t know if she is human, or—”
“She is a human, Adam. What made you doubt her?”
“I found her in places that never existed—”
“You also went to those places that don’t exist. Does that make you non-human?” He circles around me.
“Why me? Of all the people in this world, why did I have to find her?”
“Didn’t she tell you why? I believe she mentioned to you that God has appointed you to be her soul mate. You thought she was bluffing?”
“Why me?”
I see him laughing. “Why you?” He repeats. “It is quite unbelievable for all of us that your donations have made you really unique among all the other humans. People eat on your charity. They sleep in warm rooms on cold winter nights because of you. They pray and thank God because you provide them the platform.” He is still walking around me. I don’t know what he’s talking about. What do my charities have to do with this?
A Prayer Heeded Page 17
