by Atha, DL
“Irena had stirred at the pain in her hand. Blood bubbled on her pale lips as she tried to point out my presence to her father. But he was too occupied with the thoughts that I was pressing into his subconscious to understand her.
“‘She is no longer your daughter. She has risen vampire. You must protect yourself. You must protect the reputation of your family. Put her down.’ My words fanned through his mind, bringing to remembrance childhood fears and years of legend and lore.
“‘Child, I am so… so sorry for what has befallen you,’ he whispered, tears mixing with his saliva while he spoke. His voice broke; his back bowed with despair. His right hand curved around the stake I had left upon the bed. He did not question its presence.
“‘Father, I am still your little girl.’ She struggled for each word. ‘Please listen. Feel my heart beating. Feel.’ She groped for his hand, placing it on her chest. ‘I am alive, Father. There is still time. You can save me.’
“Under his hand, her heart beat out an unnatural rhythm. But he did not recognize it. The image of the demon I had created in his mind was too strong. Tears streamed down the wrinkles of his face like water through mountainside gullies. He had aged, it seemed, literally in front of my eyes.
“‘Irena, forgive me for bringing you to this accursed place. I am so sorry. How will your mother ever forgive me? She warned me time and again this was no place for a lady. I would not listen. I can never forgive myself.’
“‘Father. Listen to me. I am still alive. There is time. Remember the legends. Bring me the vampire’s heart, and I will be free of the curse.’ She desperately tried to bring his mind around while I mocked her efforts from the corner.
“‘He cannot hear you, Irena. He hears what I want him to hear. He sees you as I have told him to see you, a vile demon who must be put down,’ I said to worsen her despair.
“‘Yes, child, you will be free. I will save you,’ the duke whispered into her ear as he pulled her close, placing a father’s kiss on her cheek. ‘Do not fear, child. You will be buried with all the rights of the Church. They will not put your body on unhallowed ground.’
“‘Father. No. I have been marked. I need his heart.’
“But the duke heard nothing else she said, and with one last kiss to her forehead, he drove the stake through the fluttering heart that beat beneath his hand.
“I smiled as his daughter’s heart sputtered underneath the tips of his fingers, struggling to squeeze out another ounce of blood before finally giving way to utter stillness. She stared up at the one man who had truly loved her as he watched death steal across her features.
“Tears of pain trickled from the corners of her eyes. Her mouth moved, her eyebrows lifted slightly, and leaning down, he placed his ear to her mouth, but the words died on her lips. Even I did not know what she had hoped to say. He wiped one last errant tear from her cheek with a bloodstained finger as her eyes turned dull.
“Pulling my hold from his mind, I peeled away the image of Irena that I had created for him, erasing all vestiges of myself in his subconscious. I let him see that she had been human still when he drove the stake through her heart. I brought to life in his mind the beautiful first-born child he had held in his arms, the precocious daughter with blond curls that hung to her waist, the daring young woman he had presented to society. I let him relive their first father-daughter waltz, watch again as she took her first step, first horseback lesson, stutter her first words, and then I let him hold her in his arms one more time.
“‘What have you done?’ I whispered to his subconscious as my final parting gift, leaving him alone to answer the question.
Chapter 13
“Irena’s body was found, alongside her still sobbing father, shortly before nightfall that evening. The fang marks on her body left no doubt as to what fate she had suffered. The duke, inconsolable, had stood vigil beside the body all day. The Baranov had found him, leaned against the bed, muttering about murdering his daughter. He could not be comforted and finally was loaded onto a ship bound for Russia and shipped away. His last request was that Irena be interred on holy ground, and he paid the archimandrite handsomely for the privilege.
“The daylight had been lost by the time the search party entered the forest to hunt me down. Ivan, when confronted by my handiwork, had agreed to lead the way to my grave. I had been waiting all day, my mind a haze of anxiety and dread that they would come while I was yet incapacitated.
“It was with great relief when the lingering sun dropped behind the horizon, and I was finally released from my paralysis. I had dissolved into a vapor of consciousness, passing through the solids of wood and earth before coming together atop my grave.
“It was to be my last night free, and with that knowledge, I inhaled deeply, replacing the stale air of the tomb with the freshness of the forest. The Aurora Borealis danced atop of me; as a human I would have missed its glory as it was too faint for mortal eyes, but tonight as a vampire, I watched the ribbons of color as they snaked through space. The breeze was stiff, and the salt of ocean spray danced in the air and burned my eyes.
“The forest had been alive above me while I had yet been in my tomb, but now as I stood above it, the sounds of the forest died around me. A few hundred feet away, a bear made the sudden decision to abandon a recent kill. An otter slipped into Indian Creek within the forest to my right while an owl rustled the air above me as it took off from a nearby tree. It did not like my presence it seemed. Smart bird.
“On the wind, I smelled Ivan and the men that followed him. Fear dripped from their armpits and escaped onto the wind from their mouths as they breathed it from their core. Their hearts tapped out a staccato I could palpate in the air, and although it had only been a day since I had fed, my mouth watered and my appetite swelled. Mine was a hunger that could not be satiated; a desire that could not be laid to rest even though I was the one now being hunted.
“The hunting party was close; I could hear them stumbling through the underbrush. The high-pitched rub of parkas on tree limbs, the rattle of one man’s lungs, and a whispered prayer for safe return by another proved the group grew close.
“I considered, for a short moment, escaping into the blackness of the forest or feasting on their blood. But for what purpose? I had promised myself that I would never harm Ivan. He and I had been closer in life even than brothers, and my thirst for blood would not see me separated from him. Escape was not possible since I was compelled to return to my gravesite come morning; if the deed was not performed tonight, Ivan would return at dawn. I was doomed either way and I preferred to meet the stake upright and on my feet.
“I was considering the immortality of the stars when I heard the group of humans step out of the forest and into the clearing where I stood waiting. My skin tingled from their nearness, the fine hairs on my arms lifting like the mantle on a dog. My mouth watered, but still I gazed at the heavens, memorizing the patterns of lights. I knew I would not see them again for a very long time—possibly never.
“There were seven of them—six white men and one native. The smell of their clothes and diet would have given their race away even if I could not have seen their skin. Fear permeated the air around each of them, but the native had a calmness that none of the white men could approach. He had no fear of death, only of the pain that came with it, and his bravery flavored his scent.
“Garlic and salt also mingled with their fear. They had carried the substances with them, and it overran their coat pockets and satchels. One human carried a torch, the fire wavering in the wind with the tremble of his hand. All of them, even the native, carried a cross, and despite the distance between me and them, its power caused my eyes to burn. I closed my eyelids to the sight.
“‘Adrik,’ Ivan spoke aloud. ‘We have come to put you to rest.’
“‘What makes you think I will let you, brother?’ I asked out of curiosity. Did he love me still as I loved him?
“‘It is because we were as brothers that I know y
ou will submit to me,’ Ivan answered.
“To the rest of the men, I asked, ‘And the rest of you, should you not have waited until daylight to come? Here in the darkness, you are weak and strength belongs to the undead.’ I murmured into the cool wintry air, my voice equally icy. I would not hunt Ivan, but the others were fair game. I owed them no loyalty.
“Surprise and recognition crept across their expressions as the reality of what they were facing, what they had come here to do, became real to them, and suddenly the idea did not seem as noble as it had when they started out.
“‘What was the strategy? Did you think the vampire would simply surrender to your stake?’ I questioned the group.
“‘We could not wait till morning just to see who would die tonight,’ Ivan spoke.
“Fright oozed from their skin, stronger now, and carried towards me on the wind; I swirled the taste of their pheromones on my tongue. Their fear was intoxicating and having energy of its own, I drank it in, unable to quell its power over me.
“Ivan, standing center, was flanked by the others. He trembled slightly in my presence, and his face was contorted with a disgust that not even the empathy in his eyes could overcome. The men that spread outward from him, an odd assortment of hunters and soldiers, beheld me with nothing but contempt. These were hardened men, tough, accustomed to working in the worst conditions, facing the most violent of predators, but now they were unsure of themselves, having never faced the likes of the monster that stood in front of them.
“One of the men stepped slightly forward of the others now. He was more boisterous and verbally threatened me. The others of the group eyed him warily and warned him to stay back. I remembered this man. His name was Alexei and we had worked together on repairing the palisade at the fort many times. He was known for his temper and his tenacity. He was not known for restraint.
“Tonight, his breath reeked of alcohol, and I could smell the odd mixture of untempered courage and stupidity in his sweat. He seemed an odd choice for such a dangerous expedition, and I could see by the nervous glances of his fellow hunters that they agreed with me. I studied him until Ivan’s voice broke my attention.
“‘Irena is dead, Adrik. You have what you wanted. Let us get this over with tonight,’ Ivan said, his voice steady enough to the human ear. To me, it wavered, his fear apparent.
“‘The victory was sweet,’ I acknowledged. Running my tongue over my fangs, I smiled at the men. They swallowed hard with disgust at my double meaning and I laughed aloud at their pious disgust. ‘How innocent you all pretend to be! How many of you had not wanted to taste her? And some of you had, and yet, here I stand, dead by your sins! Even yours, Ivan, my best friend! You tasted her too. Was it your child that once lived in her belly? So I chose to taste her after all. What was the harm in that? Did I not deserve the pleasure?’ My questions met only the cold silence of their judgment.
“‘The priest judged you guilty. It is proof enough for me,’ Alexei snarled as he lunged forward, pulling a sharpened tree branch from out of his parka.
“I sidestepped him with barely a registered thought, and he rushed past me without realizing I had ever moved. The jab of his stake met nothing but empty air.
“His face crumpled with fear as he realized he had missed. Before he could react, I twisted his large frame round so that his back was to my chest. I pulled the crudely made stake from his hand and turned the weapon back on him. His heart beat wildly in his chest as I pushed the wooden tip through the first layers of his skin. ‘The priest judged poorly,’ I said as his hot blood flowed down my hand, and unwilling to deny myself, I brought my fingers up and licked the sumptuous fluid from my skin. Anxious for more, I pushed his body forward with my other hand, feeling his body shake on the stake as I impaled him. I lost myself for a few moments in his taste when his heart had ceased.
“Dropping his body to the ground as an afterthought, I glanced back at the other men, who had fanned out behind me. They had made no move to save the man as I killed him, and so distracted was I by his blood, I had not noticed their movements or their trickery.
“‘Was he the bait?’ I asked Ivan.
“‘Not intentionally. But we were each willing to sacrifice ourselves to save the people we love,’ Ivan answered.
“‘I would never hurt you, Ivan. Nor any of your kin. You need not have made a sacrifice of any of these men.’
“‘I know you would never have intentionally hurt me, Adrik. But you have chosen evil over good, and so it will color your every action. You cannot choose which part of you it will affect.’
“They had encircled me, crosses of various shapes and sizes held up into the air in my direction. Some were made of simple wood, others ornately carved of oak, and others cast in metals but all wrapped in power. I was entrapped by the strength and no matter which direction I tried to go, I could find no way to breach the power of their circle.
“Spinning round, my eyes searched desperately for a weakness, but the humans, stretching arms out to one another now, held to the cross of the other so that the circle of men was unbreakable. Their bond magnified the power of the cross, and my eyes burned. My skin crawled, and I could go neither forwards or backwards. I thought to go straight upwards and made an attempt to jump and catch hold of the branches that reached over my head, but in the weakness brought on by the crucifixes, I was unable to rise more than a leg’s length above the ground.
“Ivan pleaded, urging me to submit to the stake, and although I had no desire to hurt Ivan, it was proving more difficult than I had imagined it could ever be to give up my reign on this life. Far easier it had been to hang myself and snuff out my human life that I should have held precious than it was to submit to the power of the stake.
“‘Adrik,’ Ivan’s voice, calm and gentle, spoke from behind me. ‘Please, brother. Do not make this harder than it needs to be. Let me help you retain some shred of decency. Do you not think enough blood has been spilled here?’
“Turning around at his question, I found Ivan had joined me within the confines of the circle. Two other men had joined hands behind his back and let him in, thereby keeping the integrity of the perimeter. In one hand, he held a crucifix, and in the other, a stake, sharpened to an ugly point that he leveled at me.
“‘Do you recognize where we are, Adrik?’ he asked, indicating the forest around us with the stake squeezed tightly in his hand. ‘It is more than the unhallowed ground where your body was laid, brother,’ he murmured.
“At first, I did not understand where Ivan’s questions were leading. I studied the ground underneath my feet. It appeared nothing special. The earth was cool beneath my bare feet. In the distance, I could hear the slap of waves lapping at a shoreline behind us. To my right, the river that helped to create the peninsula we stood on flowed towards the sound where it would intermingle with the salt water of the ocean.
“And then with sudden clarity, I realized the irony. The ground beneath my feet was a clearing because only a few short years ago, it had been a fort, the same fort where I had killed the native child. I searched the ground, half-expecting to see the blood of the child still staining the ground. It was a human memory, and I had nearly forgotten its intensity until Ivan’s words had brought it to remembrance.
“I turned my hands over, remembering the color of the child’s blood on my skin. How warm it had been but how quickly it had cooled in the breeze. ‘The child’s blood is still on my hands,’ I whispered. And I felt the shame, the guilt, all over again.
“‘There is much blood on your hands, Adrik. I wish that it was only that of the child for those stains were not really there, only imagined. But surely Irena’s blood and the innocent men you have killed will stain your hands for lifetimes to come.’
“‘I care only for that of the child,’ I spoke back, staring at my hands, at the imagined stains.
“Ivan’s thrust was strong, his aim good. So entranced by my guilt, I had taken no notice of the whisper of wind that mo
ved towards me as he struck. The stake entered my chest and seared my heart as it passed through the dead organ.
“I watched my cold blood run down my chest and drip onto the same ground that had soaked up the blood of my first kill. How inhuman it looked, not even warm enough that it would disperse on the remnants of ice that laced the forest floor. A red monstrous stain that proved my guilt and my inhuman nature.
“More stakes followed, but I scarcely noticed. Instead, I memorized the contours of my best friend’s face until sapped, my great strength gone, I fell to the ground. I lay haphazardly with my limbs askew. Ivan leaned over me. I felt the touch of his warm hands as he brushed the locks of hair out of my eyes. His tears fell salty onto my lips as he whispered promises made years ago between two peasant men, cramped together in the dirty underbelly of a Russian ship. He would send word to my mother of my death and my love for her. His first-born child would carry my name. He would pray for me every day. And he would never forget me.
“Ivan’s warm hands were the last kind touch of humanity that I felt before two soldiers hoisted my body. Ivan’s fingers slid across the tips of mine as the soldiers began the march to the fort. It was the last I saw of him for many, many years.
“That night proved more painful that anything I could have ever comprehended. Dying as a human paled in comparison to the suffering I experienced that evening.
“Terrified, the humans had lit the interior of the surgeon’s quarters with such large sums of candles and lanterns that the illumination burned my eyes. The flames of the candles danced menacingly next to the table my body rested on, and my skin crawled with the heat and the fear they would burn me first and then bury me seared in the ground.
“Perhaps the flames would have been easier, after all, than the torture they meted out. In being vampire, it was if I deserved no dignity for first they stripped me naked, studying me as if I was nothing more than an experiment gone wrong and not the man that I had once been. And worse still, at my feet stood the archimandrite, the man who had allowed my soul to be cast from Heaven. How I hated that he saw me in my weakness.
