“Get away from me,” Neph mumbled as he forced his eyes open. The world blurred around him, then slowly came into focus. Bright sunlight showed through the window illuminating his room in the Delvay keep. Kes frowned down at him from beside his bed, her hand poised to deliver another swipe of the wet cloth. “Get away from me!” Neph snarled with more conviction and forced himself to sit up. Pain echoed through his body. Every inch of his flesh seemed to be bruised or bleeding.
“You haven’t had a healer, Neph. You are going to tear the wounds back open. Lay back down,” Kes ordered in what had to be her best impression of a motherly voice. Her tanned face was creased with worry and he could see glassiness in her dark green eyes.
“You brought her to him. I saw you in the woods Kes. How dare you even come near me after what happened,” Neph growled. Ignoring her words, he pulled himself from the bed. His knees wobbled beneath him, but he gritted his teeth and forced himself to remain upright.
“I had no choice about that, Neph,” Kes said softly. She started to move toward him, then hesitated and shook her head at him. “Please, Neph, lie back down. Lord Delvayon won’t let a healer in to see you, but he says if you live you have passed the trials.”
“Fuck his trials,” Neph snarled, his gaze searching his room for his armor. “Neph, please lie back down. You are hurt worse than you think,” Kes repeated.
“I’m leaving,” Neph informed coldly. Staggering on his feet he moved to his closet and began to shove his travel bag full as quickly as he could.
“What? You can’t be serious, Neph you can barely cross the room,” Kes argued as she moved up behind him and tugged at his arm trying to pull him back toward the bed. She wasn’t forceful, but the little strength she used threatened to unbalance him. Shrugging her off, Neph turned and glared at her, allowing her to see just a glimpse of the hatred he felt. With a gasp she stepped back, staring at him in shock.
“Get the hell out of my sight. I’ve never hit a woman before, Kes, but if I so much as see you again, I will kill you.” Neph spoke the words with cool promise.
“Neph, I had no choice,” Kes muttered. Fumbling, she opened the door behind her, still staring at him with wide eyes.
“We all have a choice, Kes. You chose to kill my sister,” Neph snapped, his eyes flashing with anger, but he knew he was in no condition to act on it now. It was taking everything he had just to pack his bag.
“Had I refused, he would have thrashed me, Neph.” Kes pressed herself against the door frame, her eyes intent on his every move.
“And that is the problem with Delvay. We say we kill cowards, and yet everyone in this city is a fucking coward. No one speaks his mind. No one dares defy my father. You are all weak pathetic bitches. Never again will I soften my words, and when something is wrong,” he paused and locked gazes with her. “I will act on it despite the consequences. I will never again bow down before someone who doesn’t deserve my respect. Lord Delvayon can kiss my ass and so can the rest of this god forsaken place. I will not return to Delvay until that bastard is dead.”
“Neph, please, I know you are angry, but he has forgiven you.” Kes’s eyes searched his face frantically as she spoke as if she was looking for some sign of rational thought. It was clear from the expression on her face she thought he had gone mad.
“I will never forgive him, or any of you for that matter. This is not what Delvay was. We were the heroes in the past, and he has led us down a much darker path. I will keep the name Delvayon for one single purpose. To set everything right.” Glaring at her, he motioned toward the door once more. “Go,” he ordered, allowing anger and hatred to fuel the word. She fled the room without another word, confirming his thoughts about cowards. They should all hang as Zyi had.
Swinging his bag over his shoulder, Neph walked from his room and down into the main hall, ignoring the staring faces that watched his progress. He had no words for any of them. They had avoided looking at him in the grove, but they all watched him now.
“Neph,” Kadan called from behind him, but he ignored his brother and continued for the door. He had one more purpose in Delvay and then he would leave and never look back, at least not while RenDelvayon lived.
Neph made his way in silence through the front gate and up the small path that led to the trial grove. Her body was still where he had left it, as he knew it would be. It was custom to leave the remains of cowards or traitors for the scavengers of the forest. He had known Kadan would leave her here, despite the fact that she had been neither.
Pulling his bag free from his shoulder he dropped it to the ground and knelt in front of her. His eyes traced over her face memorizing each detail. She had been his twin in everything. They shared the same eyes and pale hair. The only difference had been their strength. All of his life Neph had believed he was the stronger of the two of them, but Zyi had proved him wrong. Out of everyone in the city below, she had been the only one strong enough to tell RenDelvayon no, and she had died for it.
Slowly he pulled his dagger from his boot and gently cut a lock free from her tangled blond hair. Wrapping it carefully around his hand he sliced the edge of his palm and let his blood run slowly down to mingle with the dried blood already staining the hair. “I’m so sorry Zyi. I should have gone with you, or stood up to father. I don’t really know what I should have done. I just know I should have done something.” Neph paused and stared down at the bloodstained hair. Silently he clenched his fist around it before looking back down at her body once more. “It won’t happen again, Zyi. I promise you that. From this day forward I will speak my mind and to hell with the consequences. I will not back down when I know something is wrong.” He paused and tightened his hand on the hair. “I promise you I will help those who truly deserve it as I should have helped you, Zyi.”
Footsteps on the path behind him drew his attention and Neph glanced back at two riders approaching. Letting out a slow breath he stood and tucked the bloody strand of hair into his cloak pocket before turning to face them. He closed his eyes for a moment and willed himself back to calmness. There were so many emotions churning in his gut it was nearly impossible to keep from sobbing or screaming. Neph wasn’t sure which he truly wanted to do.
He recognized both of the riders, however, and now was not the time for either.
“By our beliefs, the dead do not hear our words. Once the soul has left the body it is in the hands of the Divine and no longer cares for mortal concerns.” His Aunt’s voice was calm and level as was the expression on her wind burned face. She was younger than his father by several years, but it didn’t show in her features. KayDelvayon lived most of her life outdoors and the effects showed in her numerous scars and deeply tanned skin.
“I doubt you are here for theology lessons. Are you planning to drag me back?” Neph asked coldly.
She frowned her disapproval at his tone and shook her head, her long brown braid bumping slowly against her armor. “We are planning to help you bury your sister,” Kay explained in the same neutral voice. Turning back to her snow cat she pulled a shovel from behind the saddle and tossed it to the second rider. “Kadan, start digging the hole. I need to speak with your brother for a time.”
Neph had purposely avoided looking at Kadan until that moment, but now he couldn’t help but watch in stunned amazement as his brother caught the shovel and dropped from the saddle wordlessly. Without so much as a glance in Neph’s direction, Kadan set up the hill and into the woods, his gaze searching the ground as he walked.
“I have nothing to say to anyone,” Neph began, but his Aunt cut him off with a sharp gesture.
“I have plenty to say to you, so shut up and listen,” Kay snapped. Turning, she searched the area until her eyes landed on a spot beneath a massive pine that was reasonably clear of rocks. With another quick gesture in his direction, she made her way to the spot and dropped down into a cushion of pine needles.
“I don’t have to listen to you. I am apparently a citizen now,” Neph grumbled, but even as he spok
e the words he was walking to join her. Her clear brown eyes settled on him as he sat down across from her and he could see how exhausted she was.
“I don’t have to waste my time seeking you out, either. I love you, however, so I did. You love me as well, so you will listen,” Kay said with a sigh. Her gaze trailed past him for a moment to Zyi’s body and a flicker of pain crossed her face. She shook her head sadly and met Neph’s gaze once more. “I won’t defend what your father did. I will explain it to you, though,” she began.
“I don’t want you to explain it. I don’t want to think of him at all,” Neph snarled and sat back quickly as her large palm connected squarely with the side of his head in a solid smack. Blinking, he stared at her in shock. His Aunt had never raised a hand at him before, even when he had deserved it.
“I said shut up and listen, Neph. I’m tired and I have no patience for petulance. I rode all night to reach here when I heard what happened,”
Kay snapped back at him. With another sigh, she rubbed the fingers on the hand she had smacked him with and shook her head lightly. “Thick- skulled brat,” she muttered. She shifted where she sat and adjusted her sword before continuing. “The trials have always been part of Delvay, Neph. In the beginning, however, they were only for our warriors. It wasn’t until after your Grandfather died that it was decided that everyone must be a warrior and therefore everyone must take the trial. Not everyone agreed with it, but Ren was in charge so they accepted it.”
“Cowards,” Neph grumbled, his expression filled with disgust.
“What is the penalty for treason, Neph?” Kay asked sharply her eyes narrowing.
“It varies depending on the severity, but typically its disembowelment and being left to the mountains,” Neph answered slowly with a frown beginning to form on his face.
“Delvay is ruled by the strongest; it always has been. To disobey or to go against a direct order of our leader is considered treason. So unless you can take Ren in a fight, you accept what he says. No one in Delvay can defeat my brother yet. You might have considered that before you spoke so harshly to Kes. She had no choice but to do what she did.” Kay’s tone had grown harsher and Neph could see the anger she was working so hard to control.
“What do you mean, yet? You think Kadan will ever take over?” Neph asked dryly and shook his head in disgust. “Kadan doesn’t have the balls to challenge father.”
“And neither did you before today, but no, I wasn’t thinking of Kadan,” Kay answered with a faint smirk staring pointedly at him.
Eyes widening Neph returned her stare until she nodded slowly. “Me?” he asked dumbly, though she had already answered his question.
“My brother is a strong ruler, but he isn’t a good ruler, Neph. He is doing the best he can with what he has, though. The trials weed out the weak for several reasons and if you will be silent long enough, I will let you know them.” Kay paused and watched him as he nodded for her to continue. Her gaze flicked back to Zyi once more and her anger faded to what seemed to be resignation to his eyes. “Delvay is failing, Neph. Our heroes are gone and we are losing our strength. There was a time when only the best were chosen to defend Delvay. Now everyone must.”
“But if we need numbers, why do we kill our children?” Neph broke in.
Kay glared at him for a long moment and rolled her eyes. “I am explaining that, Neph,” she grumbled shaking her head at him once more. “It’s two reasons, mainly. We cannot show weakness to the outside world. That is why our children are not permitted to leave Delvay at all until they are past the trial. If our enemies had any indication of how weak we are now, they would march in force without hesitation. We are insular; we always have been. Now, however, it is more hiding than anything else.” Her words faltered and she rubbed her face. “The other reason is for future generations. Our blood is already too weak now, Neph. That is why we don’t allow commons to live among us. We can’t afford to weaken ourselves further. Our lands are harsh; they do not provide much. We cannot have a large population here, and we cannot force the strong among us to provide for those too weak to take care of themselves. Everyone must do their part, and if they are too weak to do it…” Her voice trailed off and she shrugged at him.
“Zyi could have left like mother did. He could have exiled her and taken her name and then it wouldn’t have reflected back on Delvay. He didn’t have to kill her,” Neph argued, a spark of his anger returning at her callous words.
“No, he couldn’t have, Neph. Do you have any idea how many children fail the trial each year?” Kay spoke gently and watched him as he shook his head slowly. “No, I didn’t think you did. Too many, Neph. As I said, Delvay is failing. How could Ren let his daughter walk away after forcing so many others to die in the trial?”
“He could have let her go when she ran away. He could have disowned her after she was gone rather than turning his back on her after she was already on Death’s doorstep,” Neph broke in once more.
“No, he couldn’t. Despite how you say no one would know where she was from, they would. All it would take is for Zyi to talk about her past. One little whisper to someone she trusted and soon everyone wherever she was would know she was High Lord Delvayon’s errant daughter. People gossip, Neph. I loved Zyi as much as I love you, Neph, and I grieve for her passing, but she was weak.” Kay leaned back against the Pine tree and watched him as a wave of emotions washed over him.
The desire to lash out was so strong he had to bite his own tongue. Instead, he tilted his gaze up to the pale blue sky and tried to rein in his emotions once more. Kay had always been honest with him. Some truths, however, were painful to hear.
“Tell him all of it, Kay. Don’t let him walk out of here thinking he will find her.” Kadan’s voice broke the silence between them and Neph turned his gaze back to his brother. Slowly he looked back at Kay a frown creasing his face.
“Why won’t I find my mother if I search for her?” Neph demanded cautiously.
Kay closed her eyes for a moment then turned to glare at Kadan. “I was getting to that, Kadan. I trust the grave is done?” “It is,” Kadan agreed.
“Watch your words, then, or I will be digging another and you will be measuring your own work from the inside,” Kay said in a clipped voice before turning back to Neph.
“Delvay’s strength is failing, Neph. Magically, you are the strongest child that has been born in the mountains in the last five hundred years. Your sister showed potential as well, but she didn’t have the strength of will that you do,” Kay began carefully.
“What does my magic strength have to do with my mother?” Neph snapped.
“You are stronger than father ever was. It’s rumored that you are stronger than my Grandfather was. You don’t show any of the weakness that is plaguing Delvay. What does that tell you, Neph?” Kadan growled drawing another glare from their Aunt.
“Kadan, I’m warning you for the last time,” Kay said levelly. Turning back to Neph, she shrugged. “There is no pleasant way to explain, Neph, but what Kadan says is true. Add the fact that you were born early by nearly two weeks and the fact that your hair is blond while your mother’s was chestnut and well…” Her words trailed off once more and she shrugged again.
“So, I’m not truly Delvayon?” Neph gasped his eyes flickering between the two of them.
“Your mother was a cousin of our house, so technically you do have some Delvayon blood,” Kadan offered gently. “Well then, who in the bloody hell is my true father?” Neph demanded.
“No one but your mother knew that, and no one has seen or heard from her since the night you cast your first spell at three years of age. It was strong enough to knock a hole through the keep wall, and far more powerful than any Delvay child would have been capable of. After that, Ren told us all that she had run off. Most of us didn’t believe it,” Kay explained softly. She chewed on her lip for a long moment before meeting Neph’s eyes once more. “Delvay won’t stand much longer at this rate, Neph. My brother is le
ading us to ruin and only a few of us even realize it.”
“Are you expecting me to save it somehow?” Neph asked incredulously.
“No, I’m not expecting it, but I’m hoping that you will,” Kay answered softly. “There is no one else that is strong enough to take control from him. Go and learn, Neph. Gain strength and wisdom and consider what I’ve said today. I will pray that you return but I will never expect it of you. The choice is entirely yours, and Delvay will do as it always has and try to survive either way.” Standing slowly, she dusted her armor off and looked down at him. “Let’s see to Zyi now and make our peace with our grief,” she said softly.
“I thought it wasn’t allowed to bury those accused of cowardice? Why are the two of you helping me with this?” Neph spoke carefully to keep the anger and frustration from his voice. They were both questions that he truly wanted answered and he didn’t want to give them reason to ignore him.
“Everyone buries their dead, Neph. Most sneak out of the city to do it to avoid difficulties. No one leaves their child for the wolves, though,” Kay answered with a sigh.
Kadan simply shook his head and shrugged. “She was my sister, Neph. I do what I must to keep him happy, but I didn’t want this anymore than you did. I simply knew I wasn’t strong enough to challenge him on it. You lived, Neph, I wouldn’t have. My hopes are resting on you as much as Kay’s are.”
“I haven’t forgiven you for allowing it, Kadan. You should have spoken up regardless of strength. Maybe if the two of us had stood together, he would have listened.” Neph stared hard at his brother as he spoke, but Kadan didn’t so much as flinch, instead he smiled with approval.
“I don’t expect you to ever forgive me, Neph, and if you do I’ll be disappointed. I doubt I’ll ever forgive myself. Don’t expect me to say more on the topic, Neph. Let it lie between us as it is. You never know when you are being watched, or by whom.” Kadan turned with those words and walked silently back toward the trees where he had dug the grave.
The Elder Blood Chronicles Book 4 The Blessed Curse Page 3
